100 lb. Club - Started binging now I hate myself
02-10-2013, 02:10 PM
Turns out, I can't be left alone where food is concerned. I will eat and eat if I'm alone and bored. I just ate like 7 strips of bacon on tortillas with blue cheese crumbles. It wasn't even a really good combination, but I couldn't stop myself for a little bit there. So I've used up my calories for the day, and it's only 1 PM. I'm going to have to be extra careful for the next 24 hours to make sure that I get back on plan and stay there.
On the bright side, I stopped before the 7 strips became the whole pound.
02-10-2013, 02:38 PM
Well at you stopped thats the good thing.
Tomorrow is a new day, you can't fix past mistakes but you can chose to forgive, learn and succeed tomorrow. "and the rest of today" just because your over doesn't mean you have to toss away the entire day just make better choices :)
02-10-2013, 02:56 PM
Hating yourself helps absolutely nothing, so stop that right now!! ;)
Really, you can't be perfect all the time, nobody can. Are you being too strict on yourself and not allowing any treats at all? Down the deprivation route lies madness! Also, what Thinforme said: you stopped and that's what counts. Think about the foods you're craving and if there's any components in them that make them particularly appealing, or if there's any nutrients you're missing. Any chance you're running low on protein or working out more? Then if you're missing anything you can re-incorporate it in a more controlled, on-plan way?
Either way: *hugs* and DO NOT hate yourself. Would you hate any of us if we just ate what you did? Same respect and compassion applies to yourself!
02-10-2013, 03:39 PM
Awww, don't hate yourself. That just triggers more bingeing. You can stop this. You have to love yourself. You do deserve love and compassion. Just take it one day at a time.
02-10-2013, 03:40 PM
I'm the same, simple don't let yourself get bored, knit,sow, exercise, read, anything that engages you and passes the time. Boredom is failure in a cloak.
02-10-2013, 03:45 PM
02-10-2013, 05:16 PM
Thanks for the support. I guess "hate myself" was a bit of melodramatic hyperbole anyway, but it feels good to talk about it with people who have been there.
As the denoument to my terrible after noon, thanks to the aforementioned bacon I've been nauseated all day.:devil: I only even cooked it because I was afraid it wasn't going to last another day in the fridge and part of the reason I'm fat is that I hate to waste food. This time, it bit me in the butt.
02-10-2013, 05:52 PM
I am the same, I hate wasting food. I used to just snack on my kids left overs "chicken nugget, a few french fries" here and there and it would really add up.
02-10-2013, 06:05 PM
Do you have a friend or neighbor that you can give food to, if you need to? I can be the same way about not wanting to waste food. Today, I took over a couple of bags of off plan things from my freezer and pantry to my sister. I don't want to eat them, my son doesn't like them but my sister and her her family will eat them so they aren't going to waste - or to MY waist! lol!
02-10-2013, 06:08 PM
I only even cooked it because I was afraid it wasn't going to last another day in the fridge and part of the reason I'm fat is that I hate to waste food.
Sorry you had a rough day. :( ^^^^^ This is something I am learning. It's ok for me to throw away food, I don't have to inhale every last bit. It's been a huge part of my learning curve. I am a clean my plate then eat everything left in the pan kind of girl, even if it's enough to feed a small country. Now part of my strategy is to just get rid of it (cooked or not cooked) and tell myself it's honestly ok.
I hate to waste food
Huge, huge issue for me too. I too will eat the last chicken nugget or fries from my son's meal instead of throwing it away. At least now I'm making myself COUNT it, which seems to help I guess.
Don't hate yourself for a bad day. I know the feeling really. Just have a lighter than normal dinner and get right back on track.
Hey, at least you splurged on bacon! Can you imagine all the protein you had :)
02-10-2013, 07:38 PM
I tallied it all up, and actually only went over my goal for today by about 50 calories. I can make that up no problem! I skipped dinner because I haven't felt well, but I am making some nice roasted chicken for the boyfriend because he worked hard today.
I have to learn that it's OK to throw out what doesn't get eaten. Part of my problem is that I grew up fairly poor, and in our household any amount of waste was tantamount to sin. But my mother was skilled at planning and shopping so that nothing ever did go to waste. I am not as good at that.
The thing is, the money is equally spent whether the food ends up in my belly or in the garbage, so why would I eat something that is on the verge of turning? And I make enough money to not eat bad food.:shrug:
02-10-2013, 08:58 PM
The horrible truth is I read what you ate and thought, "oh bacon with blue cheese, that sounds yummy." This is why they don't let addicts cross talk. LOL Sounds like you are making a save, so that is pretty awesome!!!