Weight Loss Support - Curvy Ladies and Burly Guys - Higher Goal Weights




Renwomin
02-02-2013, 06:57 PM
Sometimes I feel a bit odd around here when I notice my goal weight is much higher than many people. Heck, sometimes my goal weight is higher than where people are starting! :lol:

There is nothing wrong with being super skinny (unless we are talking about anorexia), but I don't want to ever be there and I don't see it as the ideal in attractiveness. (We all have our personal preferences.) I know this is contrary to the messages we see in the media.

I'm 5'7". The lightest I've been as an adult is 170 and I felt fantastic and was very happy with my body. I tend to distribute my weight fairly well (at least that is what I keep getting told!) My goal weight right now is 180 and I can't see myself ever below 160. I want to keep my curves! When I get down to my goal I'll have to evaluate my health, but there is a growing body of evidence that weight in and of itself isn't as big of a health factor (http://www.nytimes.com/2012/09/18/health/research/more-data-suggests-fitness-matters-more-than-weight.html) as once thought. It is far more accurate to measure body fat percentage instead of weight as well, but isn't it so much easier to step on a scale?

I've noticed some people here have "higher" goal weights as well and I thought it would be good for us to band together for support. Anyone else out there?

Addition for Clarification: I'm not saying that skinnier people can't be "curvy" by my title. I'm also not advising that women should have higher goal weights - a goal weight is a personal choice. Along that line, we all have different concepts of what our body ideal is. I respect those differences in opinion in others while still having my own preferences.


Silverfire
02-02-2013, 07:14 PM
Hey Renwomin, I'm with ya. I know that I am not built to weigh less than 160 lbs. My super ultimate goal is to make it to a "Normal" BMI and that's around 175. I am tall, and have a large frame. Besides, I like having a shape, I have a nice hour-glass figure in there somewhere and I can't wait to be able to show it off :) Long way to go, but I am motivated!

Mozzy
02-02-2013, 07:31 PM
My original goal was 175. But I lowered it to 145 just to see if I could go below my comfort zone.
But honestly, 145 is considered the "high" side of normal for my height.


Streudel
02-02-2013, 07:44 PM
I'm 5'3 and shooting for 145, but I don't know if I can get there at my age. I'll be 40 next month and I haven't been in the 140's since I was 23. Also, I'm one of those girls who has front and rear bumpers like a 57 Buick no matter what I weigh. :D I don't think I'm meant to be " petite ".

I just picked 145 because it's just within the " normal " BMI range for me and it would make 100lbs. lost. I would settle for 150-160. I was even pretty happy with 175.

CanadianCutie
02-02-2013, 07:48 PM
I'm 5'3" and my final goal is currently 170. I don't remember the last time I was at that weight. I know I was 150/160 in Grade 5, but I was a few inches shorter then. We'll see how it goes, but I can do 170 and be happy I think.

stimkovs
02-02-2013, 07:59 PM
you know what? who cares as long as you're happy.

i'm almost 5'9 and 180 lbs. I have a flat tummy and abs poking through. more so when some people in the low 140s or below.

if you're happy, life is good

elvislover324
02-02-2013, 08:08 PM
I will consider myself a SKINNY MINNIE at 199, let me tell you! That's my goal right now and it seems so far away even though I have accomplished so much. It's like seeing the finish line and then inch-worming to the end!

When I got out of high school (a hundred years ago!) I was 145lbs and thought I was larger than life. I look back on pics and wish I appreciated how I looked. :(

I met my husband a few years after that and I was up to 159 after our first couple of months dating (hello dinner and dessert!). So then I felt larger than larger than life!!

During our marriage, the lowest I can remember getting to is 175 and everyone thought I was so skinny then and I had only been as high as about 225 to start that time around.

199 will be a dream come true for me and if I get lower than that, yay me. If I don't, people can still think I am large and I will not care!!

I do get envious of people my height or taller with goals of 130, 140, etc. I don't think I weighed that since I was 10 lol.

PUPMOM5
02-02-2013, 08:13 PM
Yes! Finally other people with higher goal weights! My goal is 180 and I'm 5'4.5". That is still considered overweight, but is so far lower than anything I've weighed as an adult, *I* consider it a great goal. I feel like being curvy is such a HUGE part of my identity that I am very uncomfortable at the thought of being smaller. I want to be healthy but still me and love my body.

Renwomin
02-02-2013, 08:20 PM
If you really look at it BMI (or any other height/weight scale) is a bad metric (http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=106268439). It doesn't take into account fitness, healthy, or body fat percentage. When athletes are being listed as "overweight" on the BMI scale you know something is wrong!

Also, I'm one of those girls who has front and rear bumpers like a 57 Buick no matter what I weigh. I don't think I'm meant to be " petite ".

:lol:

This made me laugh! I'm built the same way.

you know what? who cares as long as you're happy.

Amen!

novangel
02-02-2013, 08:40 PM
135p is the lowest I can go before I start looking too thin so 140p goal it is. People already think I'm in my 120's. Not even close.

Marniadec
02-02-2013, 08:42 PM
I don't know what my goal is. I will be at a healthy BMI at 152, so I have set that as my goal, but if the boobs or the butt start to shrink, I'll stop. :p Although, so far it's the exact opposite and nobody can explain it... I like having a goal, but I don't really think any of us know when we'll be satisfied with how we look.

CherryQuinn
02-02-2013, 08:44 PM
too each their own. im 209 and your height (op) and at 180 im still quite fat (like MEGA fat). and i dont mean pant size wise cause im about a 10 now (9-11 and probably 7-8 at 180) just in general im still quite very fat at 180 despite my fitness level and even weight distribution. so id never stop at 180. im still quite fat at 150-160 even. but thats me. I know girls my height that are perfectly flat and perfect at 160-180 too. Bodies are very different. i dont think its fair to think women who go below that 'lose their curves'. i dont, many women are still curvascious at a lower weight. its what best suits YOU not someone else. I dont think generalizations are fair to larger women or smaller women. What you find attractive is personal but generalizations are unfair. Theres a diff between 'curvy' and heavier too. just saying this cause some girls equate them as the same. You can be a size 6 and have more curves than a size 16. Its not one in the same. I'm not saying I disagree with anyones gw, just that ppl seem to be equating holding onto more weight as holding onto curves as tho smaller women dont have a feminine shape lol I know far more shapeless large women than shapeless small women. It just varies body to body so unless youve been a weight before you have no idea where you will be happy at and what you look like then. Do whats best for you and your health not some false fear of curve loss :P when youre happy with it youre happy with it

Amarantha2
02-02-2013, 08:59 PM
I agree with Cherry Quinn. People's ideal or goal weight is very personal and individual.

Renwomin
02-02-2013, 10:06 PM
It never was my intent to disparage anyone's lower goal weight. I understand it is a personal choice and our bodies are all different! My intent is to provide a place for those who have set higher goal weights to connect and bond since we seem to be the minority on this site - that is all.

Changergirl
02-02-2013, 10:26 PM
I enjoyed reading through this as I'm in the same boat as most of you. For most of my adult life I've been around 200, I hit a high weight of 220 and a low of about 188. I'm 192 now and am actually pretty comfortable being here. My goal is to hit 170, I'm pretty sure my body physically can't go much lower than that, but who knows as I've never seen it. According to BMI, I won't be in normal weight till I hit 158, but I think that's impossible. I was there in middle school.

My main goal is to become healthier and have a more active lifestyle. The extra weight is just slowing me down. I'd be fine at 190 as long as it was a 'fit' 190, right now it isn't.

Novus
02-02-2013, 11:12 PM
Several years ago I lost a significant amount of weight and was in the 190s. According to the charts, my BMI "should" have been in the obese range at 32. But I had it calculated by a fitness trainer using this hand-held thingy and it was actually within a few points of normal, like about 25ish. So, I've set my goal at 175 and when I get there I'll recheck my BMI and see how I feel and what size I'm in. My "ideal weight" - 140 - just seems way too low to me.

elvislover324
02-02-2013, 11:23 PM
My comments were strictly about me and only my experience about myself in response to the OP. Everyone's goals are personal, including mine saying 199 is skinny TO ME. I don't expect anyone to understand that 199 on my body really is skinny after all I have put myself through. :)

HelloNurse
02-02-2013, 11:53 PM
My goal weight is about 20 pounds heavier than my skinniest ever weight. To be honest I wish I could maintain my lowest weight forever, I looked great! But I was also a 16-year-old athlete and I had an easier time maintaining a little heavier weight without torturing myself, and I still looked pretty darn good.

My sweetheart has set his goal weight for 210. I think he's adorable now and I will think he's adorable no matter where his weight ends up.

yammy
02-03-2013, 12:33 AM
I also have a higher goal weight! Really, I don't 100% know what my goal weight is. I do know that I want to be under 200. I'm thinking 175-180 ish, though it'll definitely depend on how I feel about my body. I've never been one to wish I were a size 2 and I don't have a problem with having curves. I think I'd like to be a size 12, maybe 14. Currently I'm just working my way into a size 18. Time will tell, but I'm certainly not aiming for super skinny-ness. I just want to be healthy and feel good! And for me, health isn't a BMI number. It's feeling healthy, living a healthy lifestyle, exercising, eating clean, and going to the doctor and knowing that I don't have any health problems.

KimL1214
02-03-2013, 01:05 AM
My goal's set at 150, but I know that I may end somewhere between 160-170. My friends always joke that I'm built like a linebacker, but honestly they're not that far off. I once had to make a special trip to a different hospital when I tore my rotator cuff for an MRI because my shoulders are so broad! I might add that I was about 190 at the time so it wasn't because I couldn't fit due to my weight. In college I was very big into competitive power lifting and could bench 275lbs. and squat just shy of 400lbs., so I know I may never be the "ideal" BMI weight just because of how muscular I get when I work out. I'm not talking veiny, bulgy grossness, but definition (too many women have the misconception that women will get all gross looking if they lift too much)... As long as you feel good, then go for the weight you think is best! I'm glad to see someone else who isn't aiming for tiny numbers!

April Snow
02-03-2013, 01:07 AM
My goal is to fit into non-plus sized clothing. I have no idea what the number on the scale will be when that happens, though.

sontaikle
02-03-2013, 01:18 AM
too each their own. im 209 and your height (op) and at 180 im still quite fat (like MEGA fat). and i dont mean pant size wise cause im about a 10 now (9-11 and probably 7-8 at 180) just in general im still quite very fat at 180 despite my fitness level and even weight distribution. so id never stop at 180. im still quite fat at 150-160 even. but thats me. I know girls my height that are perfectly flat and perfect at 160-180 too. Bodies are very different. i dont think its fair to think women who go below that 'lose their curves'. i dont, many women are still curvascious at a lower weight. its what best suits YOU not someone else. I dont think generalizations are fair to larger women or smaller women. What you find attractive is personal but generalizations are unfair. Theres a diff between 'curvy' and heavier too. just saying this cause some girls equate them as the same. You can be a size 6 and have more curves than a size 16. Its not one in the same. I'm not saying I disagree with anyones gw, just that ppl seem to be equating holding onto more weight as holding onto curves as tho smaller women dont have a feminine shape lol I know far more shapeless large women than shapeless small women. It just varies body to body so unless youve been a weight before you have no idea where you will be happy at and what you look like then. Do whats best for you and your health not some false fear of curve loss :P when youre happy with it youre happy with it

Yeah I have to agree with you here. Thin women aren't shapeless. I'm a size 00/0 and I'm curvy! I always get annoyed when I see people putting down size 0 or thin women or that stupid campaign to end size 0.

Women shouldn't be made to feel bad about their size just to make others feel better.

For the record, I don't disagree with anyone's goal weights either. Wherever anyone choose to end up is their decision. It's just not ok to say that one body type is more attractive than the other.

caliyah
02-03-2013, 05:47 AM
Wow! :hug: This topic really hit home with me Renwomin. I'm 204 pounds but I'm an hourglass with a smaller waist leaning towards pear and I have muscular legs/calves. People are always shocked when I tell them I weight 200+ most assume I'm 160 from how I look. My BMI says I need to lose 50 pounds for my height. When I did my body measurements though and waist to hip ratio etc. to calculate bodyfat it said I was not overweight but normal range. I have always had a skewed view of myself thinking I'm bigger than I am and people always tell me I look like I have no more than 10 pounds to lose --- mostly to flatten my tummy more. So yes I don't plan to lose more than 20 pounds. Everyone has fat distributed in different ways -- some people are rectangles, some triangles, some pears, some hourglass etc. and they have different ideal goal weights.

Samantha18
02-03-2013, 07:37 AM
I would like to be at least 120-125 to get to a healthy BMI (and that's the higher end, but I have a large frame and my weight is also really even), but I'm totally prepared to call it at 150 if I feel good and my body doesn't want to lose anymore without extreme measures. I'm also a fan of curves! Looking something like Sara Ramirez (Callie Torres on Grey's Anatomy) would be perfect to me!

Amarantha2
02-03-2013, 08:00 AM
This is really what I was trying to say in my previous post, but this says it better.

Blessings, hope everyone has a great rest if the week.

Yeah I have to agree with you here. Thin women aren't shapeless. I'm a size 00/0 and I'm curvy! I always get annoyed when I see people putting down size 0 or thin women or that stupid campaign to end size 0.

Women shouldn't be made to feel bad about their size just to make others feel better.

For the record, I don't disagree with anyone's goal weights either. Wherever anyone choose to end up is their decision. It's just not ok to say that one body type is more attractive than the other.

kjnnc
02-03-2013, 08:38 AM
I totally get what you are saying about a higher goal weight. I have been thick to FAT all my life. The lowest weight I ever managed to get to was 170 and I looked sickly. So my goal is 180. At this point in my life (I'm 43) I am striving to be healthy. I have mistreated my body over the years with weight gain and weight loss so badly that I don't think I will ever have that "flat tummy" again. but if I can get to healthy weight and prolong my life by a few years then I'm good!!! Best of luck to everyone on the thread - irregardless of you shape or size or weight goal!

Hotaruchan
02-03-2013, 09:12 AM
Good luck to everyone, regardless of goal weight. Where ever you feel comfortable is best, particularly since everyone carries weight differently and many can look thinner at higher weights. (Though I'll admit to being jealous of people who can :p )

Cherryquinn: Are we the same person? I wore size 7/8 pants at 180 and I had a few friends actually demand to let them check my tags and step on a scale for them because I was a very chubby (albeit very athletic) 180 lb person. I thought it was pretty normal, but it seems like a lot of people are in double digit pant sizes at my height when around 180. It must just be that I have no butt...

...which leads me to part two, wherein you were discussing how smaller women can have curves. I think I've actually gotten considerably curvier since losing weight. Before I was just (to quote Christmas on Sesame Street) "built like a dump truck." Lots of muscle under lots of fat, which, paired with short hair, sometimes left me being mistaken for a dude from behind. I'm certainly not Tinkerbell now, but my chest is a lot more proportional on a thinner body, and I actually have enough of a waist now to make it look like I have hips. There's still a lot of belly bulge (apparently the PCOS will help see to it that that's the last to go), but I can wear dresses and have a shape now.

If I had a less unfortunate natural build, I'd probably be happy where I am now. Unfortunately I can't do this, (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V1DxmmpzrTM) so I'm stuck on the diet for a while longer. I can't wait to be back in the US where low-carb is actually an option...Insulin Resistance+required school lunch filled with rice, breading, and starch=bad news bears.

ImImportant
02-03-2013, 10:08 AM
Renwomin. I get it. I read and re-read but I didn't see anything in the posts that said others don't have a right to their goals. Nor did I see where you or anyone said that 0/00 can't be curvy. Unless there was some editing I just thought you were discussing personal preference.

I appreciate this thread because I'm shooting for the upper end of my healthy BMI and found myself scanning posts to see if I was the only one with a similar goal.

CherryQuinn
02-03-2013, 10:09 AM
@ hotaru ---lol I have a 40 inch hip measurement so i guess thats small for my weight, im an hourglass shape right now but my weight is so even that im chubby everywhere so i can get into smaller clothes faster but im still rather large with a belly and many smaller bumps elsewhere. Thats my explanation lol so yeah we probably have very similar body shapes and not too different in height either.

racrane
02-03-2013, 10:45 AM
Everyone's body is so different. I don't judge anyone's final goal weight. I think losing any weight is an accomplishment. :) As for me, I think I would be happy at 160, but I know I want to be fit at 140. But everyone is different.

caliyah
02-03-2013, 11:38 AM
Yes definitely very thin women can have curves if that is their body shape.

This model although extremely thin still has hourglass build.
http://i47.tinypic.com/2nv6ww7.jpg

ImImportant
02-03-2013, 11:53 AM
Caliyah. I tried the waist to hip measurement but I have very large fibroids that are the size of a 4 month pregnancy,so it says I have an apple shape due to a large 31" waist, 39" hips. I would just like a good way to know what is reasonable to shoot for. Until then I have to go with where I feel best.

mrsj2013
02-03-2013, 12:14 PM
The thing with a goal weight is not to set it too low that it seems impossible to
to achieve or maintain. My doctor agrees that setting a higher goal weight is right for me. I had lost 94 lb to my goal weight of 155 lbs. Now I've gained 45 lbs. back and have set a goal weight of 175 as I found it impossible to maintain the lower goal. I wish everyone a journey to success!

Renwomin
02-03-2013, 01:10 PM
I will consider myself a SKINNY MINNIE at 199, let me tell you! That's my goal right now and it seems so far away even though I have accomplished so much. It's like seeing the finish line and then inch-worming to the end!




You've done so well and you are getting so close! I'm so impressed you've stayed so dedicated.

Renwomin
02-03-2013, 01:16 PM
I'm really encouraged by everyone posting their stories! I've honestly been feeling a bit like an outsider in some ways.

I've gone back to add an addition to my first post for clarification. It was never my intent to judge anyone's decisions about their health or body, just to embrace my own.

Radiojane
02-03-2013, 01:27 PM
Very great thread. I felt like a supermodel at 215 pounds. I'm a big girl, fat or no fat, and I've embraced that healthy for me won't be much lower than 200.

LockItUp
02-03-2013, 01:31 PM
Ironically enough I've felt the same as you except for the opposite reason. I've felt "judged" around here due to no longer being overweight yet still pursuing fat loss.

Goal weights and ideal bodies are so individual, as long has you're both healthy and happy -- go for whatever you want! I've just learned not to expect everyone to understand or be fully supportive of it. I totally understand what you're talking about though, even if we are coming from different places.

Radiojane
02-03-2013, 01:41 PM
Stephanie,

I can see where you'd have that issue. It's really unfair, but I, and many people I know in the same weight range simply cannot wrap our heads around where you are. What I mean is I've actually had to kick my own butt for the mindset that if you're thinner than me, you're fine. When you're hundreds of pounds over weight, you have no idea what healthy is for anyone, and more often than not, your own issues make you extra judgemental. I fully admit that I've been this person. But what I see looking at you now, is inspiration and education for keeping myself healthy when the weight is off.

berryblondeboys
02-03-2013, 02:15 PM
Pounds on the scale really mean nothing - even for the same height.

My "hopeful" goal is 160 at my height. That would be downright fat for some people of my height and downright thin for others.

In the end, what the scale says (to a point) won't matter to me. It will be my fitness level and body fat percentage that matters to me.

Amarantha2
02-03-2013, 09:57 PM
I agree with this. It is just so individual and bodies are so different not so much in their biology but in their exact structure.

I think that is where this topic strikes a nerve with people.


Pounds on the scale really mean nothing - even for the same height ...

caliyah
02-03-2013, 11:06 PM
Caliyah. I tried the waist to hip measurement but I have very large fibroids that are the size of a 4 month pregnancy,so it says I have an apple shape due to a large 31" waist, 39" hips. I would just like a good way to know what is reasonable to shoot for. Until then I have to go with where I feel best.

Definitely consult with a trainer and a doctor to make sure you get to your goal. My own personal goal is really when my tummy is flatter and I lose some back fat I'll stop and maintain. I did all my measurements and it says I'm in normal range but it's always good to get a second opinion. :)

mnckrstn0
02-03-2013, 11:25 PM
I am okay with my body at 140, 135 is the lowest I've been in recent years. But at 140 I didn't feel comfortable in a bikini, so I've made my goal weight 130 so hopefully that will be small enough that I'll feel fine wearing whatever I want! Keep in mind I'm only 5'0'' so my goal weight should be a lot lower. But I've got hips, tits, and an *** so I don't really care how much I weigh as long as I can keep my assets and feel good :)

glittercloud87
02-04-2013, 12:02 AM
My goal is 167. I haven't been that skinny since my sophomore year of high school! I thought I was so huge back then, but will be so glad when I get back there. Shoot, I'll be happy to get back to where I was in college.

According to web-md, I should weigh 154 lbs at the MOST, but that just seems TOO SMALL for my stocky Irish frame.

Amarantha2
02-04-2013, 09:58 AM
This is a great thread & proves we are all so individual with individual visions. There is no one-size-fits-all when it comes to beautiful people.

And we are all beautiful.

Life would be pretty boring if we all thought alike, looked alike, wanted the same thing. There is no need to compare our goals or divide into separate weight watching camps, all goals are valid.

Just my opinion lol.

LockItUp
02-04-2013, 10:31 AM
Life would be pretty boring if we all thought alike, looked alike, wanted the same thing. There is no need to compare our goals or divide into separate weight watching camps, all goals are valid.



So true! :bravo:

skintoskincombat
02-04-2013, 12:37 PM
I'm with ya! I am a tall girl 5 9 1/2 and i weigh 205 ish i would be super happy to get down to 180! I used to be 160 and looked very thin, at 180 i looked womanly and when i got higher i just started to look sloppy:( some people just carry it differently!

kisskiss
02-04-2013, 12:49 PM
This is a great thread & proves we are all so individual with individual visions. There is no one-size-fits-all when it comes to beautiful people.

And we are all beautiful.

Life would be pretty boring if we all thought alike, looked alike, wanted the same thing. There is no need to compare our goals or divide into separate weight watching camps, all goals are valid.

Just my opinion lol.

This ^ :)

yourbffmegan
02-04-2013, 01:00 PM
I feel like at 200 I'd "feel" beautiful. My weight distributes VERY evenly and people always assume I'm a lot lighter than I am. (and not just to be nice.) My mother recently went on a rant about how I "must be pushing 250 and that's just not healthy!" I wish! I set my goal at 155 because that's apparently the absolute heaviest I should be for a healthy BMI.

Elladorine
02-04-2013, 01:41 PM
My goal weight has been 150 for ages, because it's what several doctors have suggested to me over the years. And even though I'm finally seeing a light at the end of the tunnel (as in I'm consistently losing rather than stalling/yo-yoing), I'm still wondering if it's realistic for me. My husband is guessing that I'll settle comfortably around 180. And honestly? I don't know! I've haven't even been anywhere under 220 since I was 13 years old. :dizzy: I'm definitely bringing it up with a doctor when the time comes, and if I need to change my goal, no big deal.

I think, more than anything, I'll be satisfied when my waist is smaller than my hips and bust. And since it's something that I've never, ever experienced (my stomach got fat long before I ever had a chance to develop a "figure"), I have no clue when or even if that will happen.

I know it's all relative and it's not something I take in a personal way, but it can be depressing to see people fuss about needing to lose weight while knowing that my lowest has never been anywhere near their highest. But at the same time, I know everyone has their own definitions of what their own personal best can be, so my personal best doesn't apply. And besides, it's not fair to compare! I want to cheer everyone on to reach their goals; we're all already beautiful and we all deserve to feel healthier and happier, no matter our starting point, no matter our goals. :)

krampus
02-04-2013, 01:45 PM
You shouldn't - if other people are making you feel bad about your own goals, they are doing "support" wrong :P

Song of Surly
02-04-2013, 01:46 PM
My goal weight is at the highest end of a healthy BMI. Actually, it may be towards the lower end of an overweight bmi. I made the goal so long ago, I can't remember. I don't know why I chose this weight, other than the fact that the thought of being even smaller than that size makes my head get a little fuzzy. I have not been below 200 pounds since sophomore year of high school. Being at 180 pounds at this point seems like enough to make me feel weird. I don't know how I will feel as I lose.

I actually almost posted a new thread about this the other day. I made a list of reasons I am afraid to get "skinny," and it was a little odd. It was actually a very long list, but it made me take a long hard look at some things. I know a lot of you women say you want to keep a "curvy" physique, and I worry about changing my shape drastically. I do argue, however, that I think the whole "curvy" thing is just another piece of crap the world throws at us to emulate no matter what our weight. Anyway, I am not trying to say that a higher goal-weight is fear based for anyone here, but in my experience, it is. My whole family is large, and I would almost feel guilty for being the one to finally make it to being little. (I know, crazy.) In my family culture, being a "health fanatic" makes you a bit of an outcast. I am afraid I could not maintain my weight at a lower weight. I am afraid of the work it would take to maintain at a lower weight.

It's weird, though, because while I think that, I worry that if I do not become a health super hero, I will not be able to maintain any weight loss for long. Like, it will be easier to slip back up to 200 pounds and bad eating habits at 160 pounds rather than 135 pounds. I know being a health super hero does not mean that you have to be very thin, but the people who I have met who are most dedicated to their health are very thin.

I don't know if this makes sense to anyone. Goal weight for me makes me fairly anxious. I think it's just the worry of maintenance in general, however.

Radiojane
02-04-2013, 01:50 PM
Very true Elladorine, Comparison is very much the thief of joy.

April Snow
02-04-2013, 03:28 PM
as the saying goes, everyone's starting weight is someone else's goal weight.

elvislover324
02-04-2013, 03:45 PM
as the saying goes, everyone's starting weight is someone else's goal weight.

Truer words have not been spoken April Snow! I see people logging in here for the first time saying they weigh 225lbs and my height, complaining they are so big and blah blah blah (like their life is over). And I'm like, what?? I feel wonderful and glad I made it this far, hoping to lose more and more.

I just looked real quick but couldn't find it. There is a quote on Pinterest that says something to the effect of "Someone is praying right now for the thing you are taking for granted.". Always makes me remember how blessed I am in so many ways, weightloss included.

LockItUp
02-04-2013, 04:32 PM
as the saying goes, everyone's starting weight is someone else's goal weight.

Truer words have not been spoken April Snow! I see people logging in here for the first time saying they weigh 225lbs and my height, complaining they are so big and blah blah blah (like their life is over). And I'm like, what?? I feel wonderful and glad I made it this far, hoping to lose more and more.

I just looked real quick but couldn't find it. There is a quote on Pinterest that says something to the effect of "Someone is praying right now for the thing you are taking for granted.". Always makes me remember how blessed I am in so many ways, weightloss included.

All so true! And I LOVE that quote.

Any given weight sure feels a lot different going UP than on the way DOWN.

It's all about perspective. Where we've been, and where we start has a huge effect on where we are going and where we think we can go.

For one person 225 means being the biggest they've ever been, for another person 225 means they've lost a crap ton of weight so far. Even at the same height that same 225 will feel incredibly different depending on where the person started.


I've really loved this discussion. See where everyone is coming from has been eye opening for me.

eliza422
02-04-2013, 06:03 PM
I just hit a goal for 100 pounds lost (102, to be exact; it's funny, I weigh 202 right now!). In 3 more pounds I'll be at 199.

In 20 years I've not been less than 200 pounds. My goal - hopefully met this year - is 175.

I between 5/6 and 5/7 (depending on the day)...so I know this number is still "high".

The way I look at it is where will I be comfortable with eating and my activity level? It's taken me 3 years to get to this point, and I am pretty damn sure I can't eat less than I do now (1500 - 1800 calories), nor am I willing to workout more than I do now (my activity level is pretty high).

So I'm looking to get to where my input = output, pretty much.

If I raise my arms, my ribs already pop out (it icks me out a bit, honestly). Almost all the weight I'm hoping to still lose is in my stomach...I'm an apple.

It does make me alternately laugh and sigh with the whole your starting weight is my goal weight thing...I understand both sides.

So I had originally thought about using the BMI chart as a rough guide, but I can't honestly say I can get to 150 or so...I really feel like that is way too little for me. I can't imagine losing 50 more pounds at this point, it just doesn't feel like that would be either desirable or manageable for me!

35X35
02-04-2013, 09:05 PM
I have a higher goal weight for a couple reasons.

When I was my lowest weight ever as an adult, which was around 170, I felt GREAT. I was wearing a size 12 misses pant and a med/large misses shirt size...and I believe a 10/12 dress. I was able to wear anything I liked, do anything I liked, stand on my feet all day at work in heels with no pain, exercise easily and so on. I also thought I looked awesome. I got a lot of attention from men (not interested in that now as I am very happily married lol) and just felt really comfortable in my skin.

Having gotten so heavy since having my kids - I think I'd feel like a super model at 170 because I haven't been that weight in about 10 years lol

Another reason I have a higher goal weight is because I don't want to do what it takes to maintain 130lbs. I mean, to be honest -- I like eating, I love to cook, I enjoy food, going out, etc. I'd rather be 170 and carefree (although I imagine I'll always have to be on some sort of 'plan') than 130 and have to work really hard to stay there.

I have controversial opinions on health, bmi etc so I won't go into all that here but sufficed to say other than my physical appearance (being fat lol)-- on paper I am the absolute picture of health -- no issues, nothing hurts, bloodwork perfect, etc (in my mid-late 30s). So, 100+lbs lighter (at 170) I believe I will be perfectly healthy and feel great :)

Of course that isn't written in stone. I could get there and decide to take it further and get down to 130 (or whatever). For now, I am just taking it one day at a time and praying for wonderland at some point...

HungryHungryHippo
02-04-2013, 10:06 PM
Honestly, I think there are more people on here with a higher target weight than a low one. And it also seems like a regional thing.

mandypandy2246
02-04-2013, 11:00 PM
When I weighed 180 I looked and felt great. I was a size 12/14 and it fit my build/body. I don't think I'd even want to be smaller than that - and I certainly don't want to fight to be smaller than that. If I can get there and maintain that comfortably I'd rather just stay there. If for some reason, after continued major lifestyle change I get thinner than that - so be it - but I will not fight to be smaller than that - I will fight to maintain when (NOT IF) I get there.

BeachBreeze2010
02-05-2013, 03:28 PM
Yeah, I think I'm in the higher goal weight camp also. 145 is still not in the healthy BMI level for my height. But, I think I will be "done" in another 15lbs. We'll see, though. I might decide to lose more. Maybe it will end up being a mini goal. As far as I've come, the idea of still having 35lbs to go is very defeating. But 15lbs, shoot! I can do that!! I'll take it 5lbs at a time once I get there. My "dream body" isn't perfectly slim with no extra body fat. I want to be able to wear a bikini, but a size M is fine with me.

Garnet2727
02-05-2013, 06:07 PM
I've set my goal at 175 which is 15 pounds heavier than normal BMI for my height. I've done this for a few reasons. I haven't weighed less than 200 pounds since I was 13 and I'm 49 now. I have a large frame and big bones for my height. I also want to be at a weight that it won't kill me to maintain it.

I've spoken with my medical practioner and she agrees with my goal and my reasons for it. The truth is, I can always change when I get closer. I honestly can't even comprehend what it will be like to be below 200. :dizzy:

elvislover324
02-05-2013, 06:17 PM
I am right there with you Garnet! I haven't seen less than 200 in so long I can't even imagine how it's going to feel.

We are similar in height and weight right now so we could possibly get there at the same time!

I think I am going to pass out when the scale starts with a "1", it's going to be unreal!

After I am done with my passing-out episode, I will reset my new goal weight. :)

Pink Hurricane
02-05-2013, 11:44 PM
Currently my goal is 175 but I wouldn't mind getting to 150, which is ideal the most I should weigh for my height. I have always been super comfortable around 175, confident and healthy around that way, so I am not going to be hard on myself if I cannot get any lower. If I am able to then great! :)

Robin41
02-06-2013, 12:05 AM
It's interesting that the reason that many people pick a goal weight on the higher side, that it's reasonably easy to maintain, is exactly the reason why I went a lot lower that I had originally planned to. I saw 165 as some sort of miracle dream number that I had thought about for years. I tried to maintain there and just couldn't do it. My problem was that the difference between 165 and 170-175 just didn't show up very much, either in how I looked or in how my clothes fit, so I just started inching higher and higher until I was fighting myself to stay at the 175. When I got myself under control, I realized that a light weight like 144-146 meant that every extra pound showed up in my face and how my clothes fit and it was much harder to fool myself that it was still ok, that I hadn't lost control and that I wasn't putting weight back on. So it's a little harder to stay at my usual 144 in terms of food and exercise choices, but it's a lot easier to catch myself before I put more than 2-3 pounds on, and I'm never fighting an extra fifteen.

This probably wouldn't work for everybody, but it suits my own personal brand of crazy.

Doomkitty
02-06-2013, 10:43 AM
If you really look at it BMI (or any other height/weight scale) is a bad metric (http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=106268439). It doesn't take into account fitness, healthy, or body fat percentage. When athletes are being listed as "overweight" on the BMI scale you know something is wrong!

You're right but, personally, I still like to use it as a guideline. I don't like how I feel at 140. My thighs are still too thick, my stomach is too pronounced, etc.. I feel better at 135, I can move quicker which is quite noticeable when your roommate is teaching you cardio kickboxing and speed and precision are key if you don't want to look stupid. :lol:

That's not to say that you can't be quick and precise at a higher weight...just that I'm not. I'm a little person, 5'3" isn't exactly tall, and I can't haul that kind of weight.

It was interesting reading some of the responses and while I know you put up a disclaimer regarding curves, I still wanted to put in my two cents...

At my highest - 181lbs - I had C cups, hips, and everything else. My ex called me "curvy" but I think we've begun to fudge what curvy really means. I wasn't curvy, I was obese. Those "curves" were primarily fat rolls. My body composition was appalling. It's still not great but it's a lot better than it was.

Now that I've lost 45 pounds, I can tell you that I am a curvy woman. The curves are actual curves, not rolls of fat hanging off every part of my body. I'm touting a smaller band size but the same cup size. Still got hips, they aren't going anywhere. My figure is an hourglass sort of shape, I tend to distribute evenly with a little extra on my stomach but not too much.

So to those who are afraid of not being "curvy" anymore, I ask - what do you consider curvy? And I say, if anything, don't be afraid because chances are, you'll still be curvy regardless. The difference will be in what the curves are made of. ;)

BUT - yes, do what you feel is best for you and ignore anyone who tries to be rude about it. Your body, your choice. I hate people telling me what to do, I wouldn't dream of doing the same. I just wanted to slip in my own thoughts, this was an interesting read. =)

berryblondeboys
02-06-2013, 11:05 AM
You're right but, personally, I still like to use it as a guideline. I don't like how I feel at 140. My thighs are still too thick, my stomach is too pronounced, etc.. I feel better at 135, I can move quicker which is quite noticeable when your roommate is teaching you cardio kickboxing and speed and precision are key if you don't want to look stupid. :lol:

That's not to say that you can't be quick and precise at a higher weight...just that I'm not. I'm a little person, 5'3" isn't exactly tall, and I can't haul that kind of weight.

It was interesting reading some of the responses and while I know you put up a disclaimer regarding curves, I still wanted to put in my two cents...

At my highest - 181lbs - I had C cups, hips, and everything else. My ex called me "curvy" but I think we've begun to fudge what curvy really means. I wasn't curvy, I was obese. Those "curves" were primarily fat rolls. My body composition was appalling. It's still not great but it's a lot better than it was.

Now that I've lost 45 pounds, I can tell you that I am a curvy woman. The curves are actual curves, not rolls of fat hanging off every part of my body. I'm touting a smaller band size but the same cup size. Still got hips, they aren't going anywhere. My figure is an hourglass sort of shape, I tend to distribute evenly with a little extra on my stomach but not too much.

So to those who are afraid of not being "curvy" anymore, I ask - what do you consider curvy? And I say, if anything, don't be afraid because chances are, you'll still be curvy regardless. The difference will be in what the curves are made of. ;)

BUT - yes, do what you feel is best for you and ignore anyone who tries to be rude about it. Your body, your choice. I hate people telling me what to do, I wouldn't dream of doing the same. I just wanted to slip in my own thoughts, this was an interesting read. =)


I agree. Curvy used to be what was pictured up above - a woman with a nice figure - think Jessica Rabbit. Somehow it turned into a nicer way to say an overweight female.

Been with my guy for 20 years and he much prefers the feel of firmness of muscle over the squishiness of fat.

Radiojane
02-06-2013, 11:17 AM
I agree. Curvy used to be what was pictured up above - a woman with a nice figure - think Jessica Rabbit. Somehow it turned into a nicer way to say an overweight female.


This is very true. I have told people on numerous occasions not to refer to me as curvy. I was "curvy" when I was 200 pounds and had a visible, well proportioned hour glass, even if I was larger than the norm. I was not and am not "curvy" at 300 or 400 or 450 pounds.

I'm all for respecting and loving people of any shape size or form, but I think that the "curvy" or "bbw" thing is doing a lot of young women a disservice. Some of us will always be heavier, even at our healthiest, and we should embrace that. But using "I'm curvy" as a crutch or an excuse for bad habits and a lack of responsibility for our health is a bad, bad idea. Political correctness has hobbled us just a little bit in that regard.

Ok, off soapbox now.

April Snow
02-06-2013, 12:19 PM
It's interesting that the reason that many people pick a goal weight on the higher side, that it's reasonably easy to maintain, is exactly the reason why I went a lot lower that I had originally planned to. I saw 165 as some sort of miracle dream number that I had thought about for years. I tried to maintain there and just couldn't do it. My problem was that the difference between 165 and 170-175 just didn't show up very much, either in how I looked or in how my clothes fit, so I just started inching higher and higher until I was fighting myself to stay at the 175. When I got myself under control, I realized that a light weight like 144-146 meant that every extra pound showed up in my face and how my clothes fit and it was much harder to fool myself that it was still ok, that I hadn't lost control and that I wasn't putting weight back on. So it's a little harder to stay at my usual 144 in terms of food and exercise choices, but it's a lot easier to catch myself before I put more than 2-3 pounds on, and I'm never fighting an extra fifteen.

This probably wouldn't work for everybody, but it suits my own personal brand of crazy.

Interesting perspective, thank you for sharing.

I'm one of those who is assuming a reasonable, realistic and maintainable goal is going to be higher rather than lower, but this is definitely something helpful to add to the thought process.

eliza422
02-06-2013, 01:09 PM
Curvy used to be what was pictured up above - a woman with a nice figure

I've always been a big gal and an apple shape. As I've lost weight (I'm at 102 pounds lost as of Monday), I've actually started gaining a little bit of shape that I would consider "curves".

It's not much...but my waist is actually slightly smaller than hip and bust now. I've never had any kind of "shape" to my body - I've always referred to myself as bullet shaped.

However, in very close fitting clothing, I actually feel like I'm getting a little bit into the hourglass shape that is seen as traditionally curvy.
I have never referred to myself as curvy despite having a largish bust; I've never understood what large women are referring to when they say they love their curves.

Renwomin
02-06-2013, 01:58 PM
Like so many things in life there is a happy medium.

Being really overweight (with body fat) can have a horrible stress on the body. But as well, being skinny doesn't automatically equate to being healthy. There have been some recent studies that indicate that one of the largest factors to long term health is physical fitness regardless your size (http://healthland.time.com/2012/09/05/can-you-be-fat-and-fit-or-thin-and-unhealthy/).

I'm losing weight to get healthier. My weight is a contributing factor to health factors such as sleep apnea, borderline high blood pressure, borderline high cholesterol. Now is the time to make the change before these things get worse. But if I'm completely honest with myself and you all I also want to be at a weight where I feel more attractive. I also want to be at a size where I can shop almost anywhere for my clothes.

I don't find fat rolls on myself attractive. I also know that at 170, I didn't have any (or it was so slight it didn't bother me). I don't equate fat rolls to curviness. We all have our own personal body ideal (and there is nothing wrong with that!). For me, my personal ideal for me is genuinely around a size 12/14. (My husband thinks the same thing. Actually I think for him it would be a bit larger.) The media ideal is much smaller than that. I also know that I can be attractive and healthy at that size. If I get smaller at some point because I get into a really active hobby than that is perfectly fine, but I'm not actively seeking a lower weight at this time. When I get down there again I might change my mind for one reason or another.

35X35
02-06-2013, 04:52 PM
It's so funny how body shapes are SO different. At 170, I had a small fat roll below my belly button but otherwise, no real 'fat rolls'. I'm pretty short too. I got *insane* attention from men -- so I guess personal anecdotal "evidence" points to many men preferring or at least not minding a girl with more endowed curves (and GASP!! even a little fat roll lol)

I've been happily married for over 15 years and my husband and I have enjoyed a very active and satisfying...well... love life ...(to be polite) no matter what weight I've been so I can safely assume his attraction for me is not rooted in my weight (thank God) but something deeper, something eternal. And I love that.

I'm doing this for me, not for what society, or men, or experts, or the catty girls who've never outgrown high school or whoever believes is the "right" weight/bmi, whatever. I think holding that view allows me to change my "goal" weight any old time I feel like it with no second thought lol

Right now, it's a higher...as the title of this thread asked input on :) Everyone has to do what they feel is best for them! I don't bemoan or criticize anyone's goal weight -- even if it's too thin in my opinion. That's their business.

Glover girl
02-06-2013, 08:58 PM
Honestly I just picked my goal as a 100 lbs less than I started with. I can't quite imagine it as I have failed and yoyo dieted so much. If I can loose 100 lbs it will be a dream come true. I'll be crazy with joy:dizzy: after that I'll reassess and perhaps lower my goal.