100 lb. Club - I really planned and planned for this Thanksgiving
11-26-2012, 03:19 PM
I really planned and planned, foodwise, for this Thanksgiving. Many of you were part of helping me figure it out and reinforce my ideas. I am thankful for all of your input, etc.
I thought I had it figured out, planned alot, gave it alot of thought, had the tools, could face the food with reserve, had healthy alternatives and more.
And still, I could not get through the four days without bingeing. I just didn't have the willingness, I guess.
I am beginning to think that it's been 48 years of horrible horrible unhealthy eating (started at age 12 for me). Maybe it's too ingrained in who I am. I feel like I can never have any long term real food sanity. Do I need to have a heart attack or stroke??? I've 'tried again' a hundred times or more. I am feeling like it's just too late.
I am feeling guilty that now 33 year old son has food issues. He is gaining weight steadily. I was never a good role model for him.
I don't know if it can ever happen for me.
I guess I will try again...
11-26-2012, 03:37 PM
You nailed that it is a will issue. And if you're not to the point you can completely block out all justification to eat off plan, you're fighting an uphill battle. But you know? That's okay! Because fighting a battle you're winning most of the time is better than losing all of the time, isn't it? It isn't hopeless, it isn't worth quitting, just be aware of your strengths and weaknesses and keep on trying.
Think of what example you set for your son when you give up, instead of crack down and find another path forward? You can DO this! A binge, even with good planning, is water under the bridge. Every day is new and every choice needs to be made fresh. You can still choose your health moving forward. Don't let this defeat you, it's not worth it!
11-26-2012, 06:27 PM
Hey! You've lost 50 lbs! I wish I could lose 50 lbs! Im the weight that you started out at, haha.
One binge isn't going to make you gain all of the weight back, you've already come so far! Tomorrow is another day. Don't beat yourself up about it, we all binge every once in a while. I just had a bit of a binge on Saturday and I didn't even go home for Thanksgiving! Way less temptation and I still did. More good days than bad days is all we need, and clearly you've lost 50lbs so you've had a LOT more good days than bad. Keep going! You're setting the example for your son by not giving up!
11-26-2012, 06:39 PM
I just want to echo other folks: the perfect is the enemy of the good. I did not plan or otherwise worry about what I ate over Thanksgiving. I ate less than I did last year, for sure. I also ate much more than I normally do. Thanksgiving happens once a year. The point is to make sure that "once a year" occasions are not your justification every other Tuesday, and to make consistent choices in your daily life that contribute to your better health so that you can be a bit more indulgent on a birthday or holiday.
To me, the MOST IMPORTANT PART of Thanksgiving is not whether you overate on Thursday, or even Friday, but whether you got back on track Sat/Sun/Mon. Whether you faced the scale and got back on the ball. That behavior - IMO - is the difference of success or failure, and I personally am celebrating that I got back on the scale and am back to my healthier eating.
11-26-2012, 06:56 PM
I planned all sorts of things for Thanksgiving. Oh, it was going to be great! :D
None of it worked out and I ended up having a mediocre holiday with my kids. But there were things that worked out, and that's what I'm going to focus on. Yes, I totally overate potatoes, sugary things and grainy things (all the things I need to stay away from), and yes, I gained some weight back. But I know that it'll come off again.
I'm back at The Plan for every day again. OMG! I've been doing so well today! I feel invincible! :carrot: Ya know what? That feeling will go away too! As a woman, middle-aged and menopausal, every emotional moment on this road to losing weight is different. But the weight loss trend, it's still with me. And I am so encouraged by the fact that I KNOW I'm never giving up.
As for your son, I have chubby sons too. I love them to pieces, but I have to let them figure things out for themselves. When they're with me, they'll see how I'm eating (healthfully), and they'll see that I'm getting healthier. They see that I'm exercising daily. And when they find value in it for themselves, they'll go there too. And then I'm sure they'll come around to my house and start preaching about how they're eating so healthy and what I should do, just to get back at me for all the years I've droned on and on about no sodas in the house and no candy, etc.
So many things to feel guilty about when raising kids. Enough to make me want to overeat!
11-26-2012, 06:56 PM
Beverlyjoy, your persistence has inspired me for years. I have a lot of respect for all you have done and are doing. Please don't be down on yourself. The binge monster is so hard to deal with. You did not go down without a fight. I know you don't have it in you to give up. Lick your wounds and come back fighting! Hugs friend.
11-26-2012, 06:58 PM
Many thanks to you all for your thoughts and input. I appreciate it greatly.
Yes....I have lost 50 pounds. This is wonderful
... I need to forgive myself and move forward.
Thanksgiving is OVER, yes.
Yes... it's not too late to be a good example for me son.
Yes... I can't let this Thanksgivng overeating defeat me.
I can't go down without a fight. I'll put 'up my dukes' for the fight back.
I threw away the leftover potatoes, gravy, stuffing, snack foods etc. (doused it with liquid dish soap too) I've given away some things too. I am getting rid of temptations.
Thanks so very much, Arcticmama, mnemsyne, lynn, and asaladandadream! I appreciate your input dearly.
11-26-2012, 09:14 PM
BeverlyJoy - your outlook is always so positive. I love your posts for that reason. I'm going to pass on my thoughts about "dieting" in general. We all have things that tempt us and pull us off plan. But most of the time we are able to eat what we know we should and keep our focus. The trick is never letting one day be more than that.
I've decided that I want to try to eat and think like a thin person. The thin people I know eat tons of stuff on Thanksgiving. Maybe 2X what they eat on a regular day. They eat the carbs, they eat the sweets, they eat second helpings. But - they only do it for the one day and usually compensate by eating less the days before and / or after.
I think this mentality helps me. My DD is thin and very fit. She watches what she eats as closely as I do, but you'd never know that if you saw her when she's out because that's the only time she really splurges. And I notice that she doesn't "clean her plate" - ever. Maybe this is a harder habit to break thatn we think! What I'm trying to tell myself now is this - If I eat it, I'll wish I hadn't, so the choice of eating or throwing away should be easy. If it's enough to freeze, I freeze leftovers immediately. If I put them in the fridge, they are easy to come back to. Harder to do if they're frozen. And then I have ready-made meals in a pinch, so there's no excuse for not eating right.
This is a ramble - sorry. Just realize you've inspired many friends in here and we are all behind you on this. You can get back on plan. And if the rest of you life consists of mostly eating healthy foods in healthy quantities with a few bad binge days scattered along the way - Oh, well! Habits DO die a slow death and they don't go quietly! LOL Good luck getting back on plan.
11-26-2012, 11:49 PM
Chica! It's not even the end of November and here you are trying to get back on track! If that's not progress, what is?! How many people would use this as an excuse for the rest of the year? You are way ahead of the game. You are way ahead of where you were at the beginning of this journey. You may think these habits are ingrained but you're already changing them!
11-27-2012, 07:29 AM
You are all so wise. Why is it we sometimes need others to see what we can't see for ourselves. I really appreciate your thoughts.
Yes.. thin people overeat on Thanksgiving... but, then hop back into healthy eating. - as it should be.
Yes - trying to get back on plan is good. It's something I might not have even considered years ago.
Yes - old habits die a slow death - good reminder.
Yes - getting back on plan will make me feel good and give me motivation to carry on.
Yes - I can strive to be a food role model for my son - it will be helpful to him.
Thanks so much geoblewis, goddessjessica, & lin ( and everyone posting who I mentioned above). I appreciate your thoughts, ideas, and caring very much.
You folks are awesome.
11-27-2012, 07:47 AM
One binge doesn't mean it is over! As other people said, you have to just keep going one day at a time. Look at what you have accomplished!!!
Tomorrow is a new day and a day to make better choices. :)
11-27-2012, 12:43 PM
BeverlyJoy - I'm so impressed that you rid yourself of the left overs and snack foods after the holiday. That's always hard for me to do - to remind myself that I don't need all this STUFF around me. The dish soap idea is inspired, too. If I ever feel like I'm getting out of control, I might well try it.
11-27-2012, 02:02 PM
BeverlyJoy you are already setting a good food example with your son by first, losing the weight; second, you had a plan even though you strayed from it; and third, you are back on track!! Trust me, you are making more of impact than you realize!!
Big hugs to you Beverlyjoy; this is not an easy battle! I love your positive attitude and spirit.
I think just by never giving up you are a wonderful example to your son.
11-27-2012, 08:02 PM
Beverely , you have always been a great inspiration for me and I am thankful for you ! You keep on keeping on ! You have been doing a wonderful job ! We are great works in progress ! No time to look back we know how to reach our goals . Good Luck Friend !
11-27-2012, 08:21 PM
I was invited to join a cookie exchange again this year. The woman who hosts it LOVES to entertain, and the exchange is accompanied by a wonderful dinner at her home, with some thought to giving back at the same time. It is always a wonderful time, full of friendship and fellowship, and a sense of giving. I am declining this year because I decided I don't want 8 dozen cookies in the house.
I'm posting this here because I'm keeping the image of BeverlyJoy throwing snacks away in my mind this year. I'm not bringing them into the house. Last year i gave at least 4 dozen away after Christmas. I don't need the temptation. My friends and family know I hate to bake. (Love to cook - hate to bake) so no one is surprised or offended if I don't have the stuff around. My holidays are very stress free. I have only one adult child and her fiance, so shopping is easy. I decorated minimally, and as I said, I hate to bake. As I see it, there is no reason to add the stress of cookies that I'll want to eat.
I just wanted you yo know that this post inspired me to turn down the cookie exchange part of the day - I can still join in the rest of the activities. Thanks for the reminder that I don't need cookies! LOL
11-28-2012, 09:23 AM
Hi friends... I can't say enough about how you have all helped me this week. Thanks so very much.
jojo - one day at a time... such a good reminder. I think I need to tatoo this to my brain!
mnemsyne - yes... the dish soap has 'saved' me many times when I just can't stay out of something. Dh sometimes asks me if 'such and such' food is pitched with dishsoap, if he can't find it. lol
sluggerbean - yes, losing this weight can be helpful to my son. Good reminder. Thanks.
dumplin - I am always touched and thankful if anything I have done or said helped another person. Thank you.
linjer - good for you. I don't think folks will mind you not doing the cookie exchange. Give yourself credit for thinking ahead and being willing to think about helping yourself with food.