Weight Loss Surgery - a few musings

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04-11-2003, 10:17 PM
well, i had my now-annual visit with the surgeon on wednesday, and actually saw the nurse practitioner. the doc has apparently gotten too busy to see everyone who's doing well. not a big deal because i truly believe that NPs actually pay more attention.

but that's not really the point of these ramblings. i did manage to grab the doc for a couple of minutes, and we had an interesting conversation.

let's face it. those of us who have gotten to the point that we need wls generally have trouble taking care of ourselves. we take care of everyone else, we ignore our own needs. some folks really do take good care of themselves. and believe me, i'm not going to even touch the various reasons this happens.

but the doc is amazed at the number of people who, despite being told 'the rules' [no carbs, and that means no juice too!, lots of protein, lots of water, exercise, vitamins] insist that they 'can't' after the surgery. he says that everyone is told 13 times that the lap incision on the left side will hurt because that's where the stomach has been cut and stitched. and despite this, 40% of the patients call to say that it hurts, there must be something wrong, and they're going to the ER.

yes, it hurts. but for me, at least, there was no bleeding, so i figured it was OK. maybe i'm just too dumb????

he's absolutely baffled by the effort people put into getting TO the surgery, and the LACK of effort they put into it afterwards. when i raised the issue of having trouble taking care of ourselves, he basically threw his hands in the air and said that they're just surgeons... they can't fix everything, and that's why they refer to psychologists who specialize in eating disorders. his point is that the help is there, and people just have to be motivated to get it.

he said that i had 'found god' and was doing just great and he didn't understand why others couldn't do it as well. i don't really have an answer, except that I had held onto the promises he'd made before the surgery. first, he promised me that if i followed the rules, this would work. he also said that the first three months would be difficult, but it wouldn't last. and he was right. he also said that after a year, i'd be able to eat pretty much whatever i wanted, in tiny amounts, and he was right.

but apparently there are a whole bunch of people who give up during those first months because they figure that this is the way it'll be for the rest of their lives.

and it's not!

so, i gave him a kiss on the cheek and told him he needed a vacation. and that he could call me anytime to cheer him up.

so, what do you all think??? just wanted to share...

04-12-2003, 11:35 PM
Jiff, I think you are absolutely right. Ole Alvin is the poster child of what NOT to do. He lives on Mashed oitatoes. I've given up yelling at him and just let him do his thing. I KNOW he's not following the rules and I really feel that in a couple of years he will be back where he started, but, maybe not... I hope not..

Anyway keep up the good work and keep n Preaching the rules to all who will listen. You are doing so good and I appreciate all you've done for me.

04-13-2003, 08:36 AM
barb... that was the NICEST hug!!! THANK YOU.

now, here's something i just don't get... ole alvin is living on mashed potatoes <disapproval here as well> but i threw up lunch yesterday because my first bite was a french fry, and not the burger!!!! after a year+, i still have problems with potatoes in any form, but i've found if i eat some protein first, i can manage a couple of bites. but who wants to eat cold fries?????

but we went out to dinner, and i managed to get in about 6 oz of korean barbecued short ribs!!!! they were wonderful! and i was really short on protein yesterday by that time after tossing lunch, so i was glad.

there's just no rhyme or reason to who can eat what and when, but we just have to keep trying to find what works for us, at least within those 'rules.'

04-14-2003, 08:19 AM
Thanks for your inspirational thoughts. While attempting to eat small portions of soft/regular foods, I keep finding myself getting sick. I'm sitting on the john thinking to myself "what have I done?" Then I realize I've put myself in this situation.

I'm making a conscience effort to slow down, eat small bites and chew, chew, chew and then chew some more. I know I have the tool, now I'm figuring out how to use it.

This too shall pass...........


04-14-2003, 10:48 AM
I have a neighbor who had wls and blew it! She lived on popsickles and icecream. She lost about 150lbs and then got pregnant and gained it all back. My husband used her as an expample for me. He said - see, it doesn't work!

I know she waited about a year for this operation and then she just didn't follow the rules. I don't get it. If I do deside to do this, you bet your but, I'll be following all the rules!

It all baffles me as well!


04-14-2003, 11:20 AM
bella... i read your other post about the lack of your husband's support, and my heart really goes out to you. is there a support group near you? does your doc encourage you to talk with other post ops? with him going away [and we'll all pray for his safe return!] you will probably need to consider getting some help for a few days after the surgery. you'll be under the weather, and that'll worry your girls.

it's real scary when one of us regains the weight, not only because we know the effort that went into losing it, but also because we know it could happen to us as well!!!

you've SEEN what the ice cream and popsicle diet can do to a wls person! and i'm so lucky to have a mentor who did this more than 5 years ago. she's looking fabulous. oh, she did put on about 20 pounds last year, but as she said she'd developed a serious pretzel habit, and after she stopped that, she lost weight again.

and a couple of months ago, she started gaining again, but got some very sound nutritional advice and is losing again. she PROMISED me that even if i gained weight after the surgery, i would be able to take it off by eating right and exercising. i've always been willing to follow whatever set of rules would WORK, so it's a tremendous comfort to me that i WILL be able to lose whatever rebound weight happens.

of course it'll take work, but that's ok.

keep coming back here, bella...