Hi all. This is the first time I have joined a forum, but I really need a support network.
I am 42 years old, 5 foot 9 inches and weigh 263 pounds. I actually can't believe that is my weight, but I have been this weight for almost 3 years. I have been over 200 lbs since the birth of my first child, over 12 years ago. Now after having 2 more children, I need to lose 100 lbs. Very scary and overwhelming!
It is hard not to feel like a failure. I have tried to lose weight for so many years, and having been successful at so many things this just baffles me. My family, while very loving and supportive, seem to "obsess" (maybe too harsh, but can't think of another word) over me losing weight and that seems to stress me out more. I feel like I am letting everyone down.
But it is time for me to focus on myself and stop worrying about everyone else. I want to be healthy, have more energy and be in control. I am not going to give up, no matter how long it takes.
Welcome! And congratulations on your journey. First of all don't feel like a failure. Your first victory in this journey was getting started. Do you know how hard that is? You've done it. You can't be successful if you never get started and you have, so go you!
I think it's hard for people not to put us off with their "obsessiveness" over our weight loss journeys. With family, I think they want us to succeed soooo much that they tend to over-support and over-involve themselves in our journeys, which ultimately are personal and private. How I got over this, was that I kept my journey private. I didn't ask for anyone in my real life's help with accountability because that makes it hard for them not to become the food police. This site provided 99% of my support in terms of encouragement, accountability, rants, motivation etc, I've found it to be a big help.
Don't worry about what anyone else thinks or what other people are doing or how fast or how successful their weighloss seems compared to yours. You're you and just as you're unique, your journey is unique as well. Success will come if you stick to it. This isn't a race. Every minute is a new opportunity to make a good decision that will help your body. Treat yourself well be kind to yourself and as you've said, NEVER give up. Know, believe that you can do it and you will.
Good luck and congratulations on beginning this journey!
Sounds like a lot of us here actually, and look where we are now? It's one day at a time. And learning from past trials and errors. I swear, this time was the easiest to lose weight because I finally figured out what I NEEDED to do for ME. Not what some book said or looking for a quick fix (though I never did try to look for quick).
You just need to listen to your body. Take it one day at a time and ride out the stalls and set backs (as they will happen). Before you know it, you'll be halfway there and even more motivated to go further. AND... every pound, every level of increased fitness is an improvement to your health, so if you never get to your 'dream' weight, that doesn't mean it's a failure either - tell that to your body that 200 pounds is as 'bad' as 263. It won't agree with you.
I have a similar story to yours, minus the pregnancies but plus obsessive family members. I've done it before, and it was hard, but I know it *can* be done. I'm unfortunately back to losing after a regain over the past couple years, but there are lots of success stories around here, and many successful women over 42 have lost. You're in good company.
You are going to meet your weight loss goals! Why? Because you came to this wonderful forum!!
Seriously, I am 46 and a little over a year ago I weighed 319 pounds. I lost about 30 pounds before finding this site. Since then I have lost about another 60 with the help, advice, and support of these wonderful people.
Look around the threads, join a challenge, but most importantly never give up! Have a great day!!
Welcome! I love your name too! I am also 42 and it was sooo hard to get started. I agree with keeping your journey as private as you can. 3FC is also 99% of my support in terms of whining, ranting, raving, obsessing, questioning, sharing about weight loss. In real life I speak very little about what I am doing or what my goals are. Remember that making little changes gradually will have a domino effect - you can completely change your diet and activity level within 1 year just by making small changes over that time. I know I was never a "cold turkey" kind of gal. Whenever I tried to drastically cut my calories, carbs, sugars overnight - I would be white knuckling it until I finally gave into my cravings with a vengeance!!! Start slow and build momentum. Also, remember that you are human and cut yourself some slack. You will eat things you wish you hadn't, you will slack off on exercise, you will overindulge on vacations - or maybe you won't! However, if you do, that doesn't mean you have failed. It means you are human and you will pick yourself up and get back on track again! You can achieve your goals!
Welcome!! You're in a great place with a lot of fantastic people who will give you awesome advice! Just stick with it and stay motivated...You can do it!
I'm 42 as well, and let me tell you, joining the board was the ONE thing for me that made the difference in being successful. It's just awesome to have a place where you can go to talk about what is going on with you without fear of criticism. Granted, there may be some tough love here from time to time, but that's sometimes what is needed.
42 is NOT too old. A year from now you'll be glad you started today. You can do it!
I am a recent member, but I too started at 263 lbs at age 40. This site has been helpful in keeping me going.
I have some "over-involved" relatives, so I don't discuss my weight loss with anyone else. I just mention to family that I am biking a lot more (and my husband is helpful in making sure the tires on the bike are inflated properly).
I realize everyone's situations are different, but that seemed to work for me: give the "busy bodies" in one's life a specific, helpful task to do, and they tend to back off. Hope that is helpful.
I have a 16yo who is way too involved in my commitment as well. I have not had soda for about four weeks, but an important part of my ability to commit to this long - term is choosing to make nothing 100 percent off limits. So I wanted a coke, and got one when I bought him food from McDonalds. I had taken only a few small sips when he rolled down his window and threw the Coke (cup and all) out the window. We were on the highway driving 60 mph.
I got enough to satisfy my craving, though. I will never admit to him that he just saved me some calories, as I probably would have consumed a bit more before getting rid of it myself. And the littering was not okay.
So, yep. I relate. And that's why I love this site. So much common experience and great support!
New here! Here is my story.....
