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Old 06-11-2012, 12:52 PM   #1  
Melissa
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Default I feel freaking awful! Foot in mouth situation!

Just last night my youngest son's teacher friended me on FB. I didn't think anything about it and accepted her friendship as well, I like her! I volunteered every day in her classroom.

HOWEVER, a couple weeks ago, I said something like, "My son's teacher isn't the brightest crayon in the crayon box, but she's a realllly good teacher. She's not a good speller and doesn't know they speak Portugese in Portugal, but she knows how to teach. My son has been so lucky to have her" And so on.

I NEVER say negative things about people, and it wasn't meant as a slam as I think she's a phenomenal teacher.

This morning she posts, "I just read someone saying some not so nice things about me and what should I do? It's coming from left field too and from someone I wouldn't expect."

I still didn't think it was me as I DON'T bash people, but.... I found that. OMG.... I feel horrible!!!

I sent her a private message apologizing if I upset her and that I felt she was phenomenal and I deleted the posting. But GEEZ!!!! Insert foot and swallow hard! I feel HORRIBLE!!!! As I really like her! And have a lot of respect for her and now I've gone and been stupid - really stupid.

Wah!!!! Just needed to vent that I'm a freaking idiot!

Last edited by berryblondeboys; 06-11-2012 at 02:21 PM.
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Old 06-11-2012, 01:37 PM   #2  
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That sounds like something that I would do, lol. So sorry you got caught like that. It does absolutely feel horrible when you unintentionally hurt someone. I'm really not liking FB these days for these sort of reasons.

Here's a good one, we were at our sons soccer game with other parents. The other husband forgot that I was on his friend list and posted (from the game) that they didn't want to talk to the other parents that were with them. That was us, we were sitting with them! LOl. I wanted to comment on his post but I let it go. Now I know how they feel.

I swear, I bet this kind of thing happens all the time. I doubt that she'll trust you much after that, honestly. Might be hard to put a spin on that one. You apolologized, I think that's the best you can do.

I'm scared to even post on FB anymore because I just don't even trust myself to post non-offensive stuff.

Just know that you aren't the first or the last to insert foot! I hope she goes easy on you.
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Old 06-11-2012, 01:42 PM   #3  
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Ouch - it looks like in this case, she was a very good teacher - teaching you the old tale against gossiping - three yogis are together and one says let's each share secret about ourselves - one goes and says he stole rupees from the church, the next speaks and says he had a love affair with an unavailable woman. Then they ask the one who suggested it in the first place - and what secret does he tell? That he was a terrible gossip.

Just be careful what you share verbally or written - assuming that it can be seen by all. Sometimes common sense trumps brilliance in those we know and those we converse with. You end with "she's not very smart" but then "that's fine" and "she's average". ... Certainly don't think you intended to hurt her, but the jabs will still feel the same, whether intentional or unintentional about something inherent to her being. But - lesson learned, no? You both will move on from it.

Last edited by nationalparker; 06-11-2012 at 01:46 PM. Reason: typo
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Old 06-11-2012, 01:56 PM   #4  
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just let time pass..i'm sure things will be fine. who isn't the brightest crayon now?? hahaha.. really, i'm sure she will forget about it soon enough. you've apologized and thats all you can really do.
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Old 06-11-2012, 02:15 PM   #5  
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You say she's "average" and you're equating that to "not the brightest crayon in the box?" I feel offended for all "average" people. :/
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Old 06-11-2012, 02:21 PM   #6  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ALEKS View Post
You say she's "average" and you're equating that to "not the brightest crayon in the box?" I feel offended for all "average" people. :/
See, another instance? I'm an idiot.... And I truly feel HORRRRRIBLE.
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Old 06-11-2012, 02:23 PM   #7  
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Default re:

WHOOPS!

Nothing you can do really but apologize, which you did.

Hopefully school is done and your son will have a new teacher next year. As for her relationship with you who knows?

Last edited by Vex; 06-11-2012 at 02:34 PM.
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Old 06-11-2012, 02:32 PM   #8  
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I suggested Melissa edit out part of her post. We sometimes forget that this is a public forum. We have lots of members but many, many more non-registered browsers.
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Old 06-11-2012, 02:35 PM   #9  
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Default re:

That is true, so I have edited mine.

Thanks!
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Old 06-11-2012, 02:50 PM   #10  
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In our district we as teachers aren't supposed to friend parents of our students....I feel for you though!
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Old 06-11-2012, 02:53 PM   #11  
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Well, it was after the school year was over. And as I said, we 'hit it off'... wouldn't know it by my statement. She has responded to my apology, and of course, she is hurt and has unfriended me - deservedly so. First time I've been unfriended.

Well, lesson learned. I tend to be a very "upfront and honest" person, but never meant to ever be the 'stupid' person. I truly was/am the stupid person in this situation (and in my re-response) I said just that.
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Old 06-11-2012, 05:01 PM   #12  
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We all say things that we're ashamed of, whether or not we intended them to be hurtful. Forgive yourself but don't forget, & you'll be doing fine.
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Old 06-11-2012, 05:17 PM   #13  
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I feel for you...I no longer am on Facebook because there are just too many issues stemming from it as far as I'm concerned. I know it's great for many, but I got out.
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Old 06-11-2012, 05:31 PM   #14  
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Ouch! Man, it sucks to hurt someone's feelings like that, on top of that learning a lesson the hard way!

I've done things similar by sending a text meant for someone else to the person I was saying something about. It's horrible, but in a way I'm kinda glad when things like that happen, it reminds me not to talk about people in unflattering ways. I've sure learned that lesson over and over and over again.

I've always thought you to be a kind and caring person from reading your posts on here and your blog. I'm sure it isn't something you will do again, and it seems like you feel truly terrible, plus you apologized. Not much else you can do!
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Old 06-11-2012, 05:57 PM   #15  
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My uncle once made a joke. A family picture was being taken, he said to my cousin's wife 'You get out, you're not REAL family.' then turned to his youngest daughter and said 'And you. You're adopted'. It was just a silly joke, my uncle has weird humour sense.

BUT, I was retelling this story to another person, then half way through I remember that person really was adopted!! I just had to stop telling the story and pretend I'd someone forgot how it ended... OOOOPS!!!
xxxx
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