Weight Loss Support - Need tips for balancing a fitness plan in a relationship! And vacation help!
04-25-2012, 09:57 PM
So, I have been doing really well for the last few weeks. I have been meeting all of my fitness and diet goals and feeling great about it. Last week I was especially motivated so I joined this forum, and also made logs and charts to keep track of my goals and progress.
Then last weekend I spent Friday-Monday with my boyfriend, which is more of the weekend than we usually spend together. Things are great between us and we are both so happy right now BUT I skipped three workouts (Not including Sunday, which is my rest day) and I didn't record what I was eating. (Which I do to help me be more conscious so I don't go overboard.)
I went back to my usual workouts today and yesterday, and it was rough. After four days off, I have been dragging and I had so much trouble getting to the gym today. It just made me feel like I do NOT want to get off track like this again. But I'm not sure how to do that. Plus, my weekly weigh-in is tomorrow and I am not feeling optimistic... :halfempty
My boyfriend knows I usually work out most days, so he asked a couple times over the weekend if I wanted him to hang by himself while I went to the gym or for a run, but faced with the choice of spending an extra hour or so with him or working out... my willpower totally failed. Not to mention we went out to eat a lot and well, yum! but also: I didn't need that cheesecake, chocolate croissant, etc...
I know the obvious thing to do is to say "Yes" next time he asks if I want to go to the gym, but I'm wondering if anyone else has had any success balancing a relationship and fitness/diet and could offer some tips. I talk to him a lot about my workouts and he knows how important working out is to me, and is very supportive. But it seems like I can't resist the temptation to just let it all go when we're together. :(
Also: We're going on vacation for a week starting Friday! Which will be so great, and I'm not too worried about workouts because I think I'll do a lot of hiking... but eating well will be a challenge. Any vacation tips are also welcomed! Thanks.
04-26-2012, 12:59 AM
My suggestion is to chill out. Exercise doesn't have to become your life's passion to be effective.
Your eating plan doesn't have to be perfect to lose weight.
Maintain flexibility and your chances for success will be greatest.
Eat a little too much one day? Who cares ... eat a little less the next day.
04-26-2012, 06:07 AM
Can't you integrate exercise into your time together? Go for a hike, a walk, bike ride, etc?
04-26-2012, 06:49 AM
I make exercise a priority. You don't skip out on work or something like that to be with your boyfriend, right? Well don't skip out on the exercise either! When you make it something that must be done then it's much more difficult to skip it. Your boyfriend can join you or you can go on your own. I'm sure he'll eventually get used to it.
When you're on vacation and you don't want to go overboard then watch your portions! Eat half of your meal and put the other away. It might actually save you money since you will not have to go out to eat as much! I went on two vacations during my weight loss and by just watching my portions I was able to stay on track :)
04-26-2012, 08:07 AM
Wow I love vocation! I think you can learn how to become a chopper in eating. Instead of cutting out your favorite foods altogether, you can take a small portion but not whole portion. Eat more natural foods such as fruits and vegetables. Drink plenty of water or other calories free beverage (preferable still plain water). Anyway, never hurry on your losing weight results.
Enjoy your trip!
04-26-2012, 10:55 AM
I totally know how this goes. These days I'm dating someone who lives down the road and we go to the gym together, but prior to that I always treated visiting guys I dated as mini-vacations and it was laughable to think I'd work out and eat "on plan" or whatever together.
The nice thing about visits is that no matter what, as long as you're together you'll be happy. You enjoy each other's company so much that you can walk for 3 hours and barely notice it. Going out is fun - cooking together is fun too!
04-26-2012, 11:07 AM
I have to say this situation doesnt go away! I lost 15 lbs after my ex boyfirend and I broke up. We used to eat out alot and he never wanted to go to the gym. He would even discourage me if I wanted to go "don't you want to spend more time with me". Plus we ate out alot. AFter breaking up with him I had time for things I loved (like running in the foothills) and I'm not one to go out to eat by myself. So I ate much healthier naturally. Well after meeting my husband 6 months later it was back to old habit. My husband lifts weight religiously. He always goes on his lunch break. But I have always been a nighttime workout kinda person. SO even though he didn't discourage me from working out, his workout was done for the day and since I work 4 nights a week I wanted to spend those three nights we had off together. I gained 20+ lbs since we have been together for over three years. I lost most all of it in 2010, but since then gaine dit back. I have time in the day and I am trying (still) to learn to get my workouts done early. Also I think age has a big role. I just cant eat as much at 28 as I could at 23 or 24. And I know I am still pretty young so I figure its going to get harder and I need to figure it all out now.
Relationships need to be a priority and being fit and healthy and happy in your own skin needs to be a priority. I haven't yet figured out how to balance all this, but if you do please clue us in!!!
I do have to say I am learning that eating is the biggest thing to weightloss for sure. In my younger years I ran more and lost weight. I just finsihed a half marathon last weekend and was running between 20-39 miles a week and I barely lost anything. Exercise make me feel alot better, but weightloss only comes with diet. SO what I am trying to say if that making sure that you and your honey eat healthy together is a great way to ensure that your not missing out on the relationship but still doing what you need to for your health.
04-26-2012, 12:56 PM
I can totally understand your dilemma!
For my bf and I, we realized we just can't eat out as much. If we do eat out, we generally look at the calories together and he's just as disgusted by a burger that's 900 calories as I am so we'll go for the healthier options.
As for exercise, maybe try wake up earlier then him and go work out so you don't feel like you're missing out on any time with him? Or you can exercise together. Like my bf and I play squash! It's super fun, a good cardio workout, and it's nice to play together.
As for the holiday, are you staying at an all-inclusive or do you have to buy your own foods at restaurants or grocery stores? I guess let yourself splurge a bit but try to pay attention to what you're putting in your mouth and make sure it's not super ridiculous.
Good luck! I hope you have a fantastic vacation! :D
04-27-2012, 12:51 AM
Thanks for all the advice and support, everyone! I think you are right about chilling out a little, JohnP. I had my weekly weigh-in today and I still made my goal (just barely) so I am still on track losing 1 lb per week, even though last week wasn't the best.
Thanks to everyone else for all the advice about my relationship. My boyfriend is an active guy, and I definitely think we could do more active stuff together and he'd be happy. And I hadn't even thought about it, but reading your comments I realized we need to stop eating out so much. It's fun, but we'll be better off if we eat healthier meals at home instead.
wannaBfitnessbuff, I'm 28 too and I am just shocked at how much easier it is to gain weight and harder to lose it than it was even three years ago! It's a serious reality check that I need to be more conscious about what I'm doing.
And it's good to hear that someone else can relate, krampus! We live an hour apart for now, so the time we spend together is often an indulgent "mini-vacation."
Well, I'm off to my real vacation tomorrow morning! Can't wait! (And we are renting an apartment, so we will be eating at restaurants and cooking for ourselves all week!) Thanks again, everyone!
04-27-2012, 10:21 AM
It's great that he's also active- do something fun together, like going on a hike, kayaking, whatever you might be interested in. Or just get the exercise out of the way as soon as you get out of bed, so you have the whole rest of the day together. That'll help you too, knowing that you already put in the work, so why have that extra piece of ____? Alternatively, do a little extra during the week and be easier on yourself when you're visiting. You don't have to be perfect, just be as consistent as you can!
Have a fun vacation!! :)
05-08-2012, 05:58 PM
Thanks for all the support everyone! I am back from vacation (it was awesome!) I almost hit my exercise goals for the week thanks to all our hikes and only gained 0.4 pounds as of the morning we returned. A small disappointment, but better than my worst fears!
Happy to report that after being home and back on my routine for about five days, I lost the weight I gained and another 0.6 pounds. I guess it's safe to say one vacation didn't derail me! Whew.
Thanks again, everyone!