Has someone confronted you about your weight? I feel so low.
I had already had one of those days where I was just being knocked down and upset, when I went to the break room to leave a lady I didn't now (I work in a huge department), stopped me and started to talk about the importance of weight loss, how she struggled to do it and did it, and how she knows of a great diet plan to do it called pancreas diet something blah blah. I have to say, to be pulled aside at random by someone because of how I look made me so upset. Is it socially okay to do this now? Am I so fat I'm catching the attention of people and they feel the need to intervene on my behalf because obviously I can't help myself?
I had already had one of those days where I was just being knocked down and upset, when I went to the break room to leave a lady I didn't now (I work in a huge department), stopped me and started to talk about the importance of weight loss, how she struggled to do it and did it, and how she knows of a great diet plan to do it called pancreas diet something blah blah. I have to say, to be pulled aside at random by someone because of how I look made me so upset. Is it socially okay to do this now? Am I so fat I'm catching the attention of people and they feel the need to intervene on my behalf because obviously I can't help myself?
No. It's not ok. I'd call her something but it is a word that 3FC censors.
Geez I'm glad someone agrees with me. I feel like if I tell my family or friends about it and how upset I am tonight over it they'll just be like "Well you DO need to lose weight".
I'm so sorry that happened. When I read the title I figured it was a family member or something, but a random person? That's completely unacceptable. I'm sure her *intentions* were good, but holy cow how insulting.
Holy crap - NO, it is NOT okay to do this! What an inconsiderate woman to walk up to a stranger and say such things.
I'm so sorry you had to deal with this. Really reminds me that some people never escape the 2nd grade school yard, I'm just so stunned that an adult would do that. I am sure she thought she was doing you a favor or something, which is just mind-boggling. I just cannot imagine.
I'm sure you were even more stunned that I am. Please, just try and brush it off. People like that truly have something wrong with them - how incredibly self-righteous.
I have absolutely no idea who she was. I work in an enormous clinical lab and I don't think she was an employee there. She said there would be flyers up soon of her B&A photos and I could give her my e-mail.
If she was selling this then it's a HORRIBLE business strategy, making me feel awful about myself knocks me off the horse.
Last edited by JollyGreenSteen19; 04-02-2012 at 04:57 PM.
I feel for you...after spending a week with my boyfriend's aunts; one of his aunts pulled me aside and told me I need to lose weight for my health. Although I'm sure she meant well it really ticked me off because she had been practically force feeding both of us all week. I just don't think people understand how sensitive a lot of overweight people are to weight comments...
Not that it makes it any better to accost a stranger but then you know she's just looking for sales and prob accosting EVERYONE at the office.
That was my first thought.
There are also people out there that have lost weight and become sort of avidly religious about spreading their newly-found gospel of supposed helpfulness. It's like they've totally forgotten what their own "before" was like and how they'd have felt about a stranger approaching them back in the day.
Either way, don't give her too much power over you.
ppl can only make you feel bad if you give them that permission.
my reply when someone pulls a stunt like that (not that it happens all that often) is something along the lines of "yeah, i'm fat - but you're an ugly moron and i'm on a diet...."
I've been there too! It's incredibly rude! I think people mean well, but unless you've been overweight I don't think they know how hurtful comments can be. I have had numerous family members tell me i should lose weight and it's ALWAYS rude from them!
My dad regularly makes jokes about things, he's very comical and one day we were at a fancy dinner party and my parents were there too, and I was talking to a lady about cakes (my mom makes cakes professionally) and she was asking me if I knew how to make them, and then my dad comes along and says, "I don't think she knows how to make them, but I know she can eat them!" OMG I wanted to disappear. It was a bunch of awkward stares and then I laughed it off, but I felt like part of me died when I heard it, and felt myself tearing up a bit. So rude, but it's also things like that that push me forward to lose weight.
People just don't get it though!! Don't worry though, you're not alone!! If she did lose a ton of weight she should know not to blurt out things like that to a stranger!
Yeah it wasn't a friend or family member with genuine concern. I've got to say that hasn't happened to me, a DISTANT family member has told me (as in don't know them, met them at my grandpa's funeral) but other than that the only person who has brought up my weight is my sister, because the idea of growing old with no family upsets her. That made me feel really bad but I know she was just being honest and that's fair enough. A complete stranger though, really? That's not necessary.
I never understand when RANDOM people come up to others and comment on their weight, suggest a diet etc. I had that happen to me once a couple yrs ago too by an extremely obese man at the library! So rude!
All I can say is shake it off and know that you shouldn't feel weird, SHE is the weird one. Sorry you had to go through that *hugs*
I had already had one of those days where I was just being knocked down and upset, when I went to the break room to leave a lady I didn't now (I work in a huge department), stopped me and started to talk about the importance of weight loss, how she struggled to do it and did it, and how she knows of a great diet plan to do it called pancreas diet something blah blah. I have to say, to be pulled aside at random by someone because of how I look made me so upset. Is it socially okay to do this now? Am I so fat I'm catching the attention of people and they feel the need to intervene on my behalf because obviously I can't help myself?
I do not understand why people think this is okay. In a general sense, I can understand if a family member or friend is concerned, but a (relative) stranger? No. It's ridiculous and it's patronizing.
No overweight person is confused or delusional about the way they look. It always seems like it's a tactic on the part of either successful dieters who're insecure or "naturally thin" women who want to feel powerful.