General chatter - Things you do as a fat person that you wouldn't do if you were thin?




Amy23
03-29-2012, 10:31 PM
I just started thinking about this after reading another post about someone reaching a mini-goal by fitting into a smaller chair. It got me thinking, and then I realized that, navigating the world as a fat person, there is certain things I do now that I wouldn't need to worry about if I was at a healthy weight.

- Breaking chairs. Every time I go to sit on an unfamiliar seat, I conciously evaluate whether it is strong enough to support my weight. If I deem it unsuitable I then have to then make some sort of excuse not to sit in it. Awkwaaard...

And if a chair has armrests, I also have to evaluate whether they are wide enough to go around me.

That's just one of the things I do to help me through Fat Life with minimal embarrassment but there's plenty of others. Does anyone else have habits that would disappear if they lost weight?


Sinoia
03-30-2012, 01:16 AM
Steps are my nemesis. I can climb steps but I am always anxious that I will be out of breath and looking *fat* and disgusting at the top. However, if there is a lift option, like you see in supermarkets, next to the steps, I refuse to take it ... I think people will think `oh yes, she is fat so she cannot take the steps!'

guacamole
03-30-2012, 01:39 AM
Wear a tshirt/shorts/coverup over a bathing suit. Have you ever gone swimming in a giant wet cold tshirt over a bathing suit? Not fun and not attractive.


Elladorine
03-30-2012, 01:47 AM
I once broke part of a barstool at a Christmas party. At my husband's boss's house. Everyone heard the "crunch" and turned to stare at me. How embarrassing. :o I wasn't even anywhere near my highest weight! I've even lost 30 pounds since then but I'm still big enough for that to remain a possibility. :dizzy:

I'll have a better attitude about clothes shopping when I'm a smaller size. I'm not sure if I have a chip on my shoulder or what, but I just get extremely annoyed and irritated every time I step into a store with clothes. I wonder if they'll have anything that will fit me at all, let alone be somewhat flattering. It's really a pet peeve of mine to go into a store and see an entire wall of clothes, and realize that the teeny little section of only 5 or 6 racks is plus size, and then when I dive into that find out half of it is maternity. Although I suppose that's better than entering a store I've never visited and finding out they don't carry plus sizes at all. :(

I'm hoping I won't hide behind hoodies anymore. When I get smaller I'm going to make it a point not to buy them.

astrophe
03-30-2012, 01:57 AM
Do bizarre shower gymnastics because I can't see well without my glasses so I need to be close yet I have a big belly in the way so I can't just bend straight over to GET close.

A.

Selen34
03-30-2012, 03:33 AM
I know this is a bit pathetic but I cut the tags out of my pants because I get depressed when I see the size.

Candeka
03-30-2012, 03:44 AM
Jump into my pants. Don't get me wrong, I wear the correct size of pants, but I have very very wide hips and a small waist so I have to get the pants up past the the biggest part of me. I carry my weight mainly in my butt and hips/sides, so once I lose weight, hopefully it will even out my waist/hip ratio a bit.

Elliemar
03-30-2012, 04:49 AM
Selen - not pathetic at all - I used to do that too and so do two of my friends! :)

I also used to find any excuse going not to go to functions (too hard to find clothes that looked good as I lived in big, baggy shirts and jogging bottoms), do anything that involved hills or stairs and avoided cameras like crazy. I'm missing from many group pictures at big events with my girlfriends because I always offered to take to pics to try and avoid being in them.

Serval87
03-30-2012, 04:58 AM
Ever since my leg busted through an old board on my parents' back porch (twice!) sending me knee deep through the porch, and causing the ugliest collage of bruising I ever saw, I'm afraid of stepping on unfamiliar floors. I don't mean like department stores or anything like that. I more mean people's houses or porches. It was very embarrassing and it hurt pretty bad.

I also have the fear of breaking chairs too.

And I constantly wonder about what people are thinking when I'm going through the clothes racks in stores. No one has ever given me a reason to think this, but I'm just afraid of someone seeing me pull out a piece of clothing and say/think, "That would look horrible on you, because you're fat," OR "That's not going to fit you. You're fat!"

When I'm around food, at a buffet, or just eating in general, I'm afraid someone is going to look at me, sneer, and be like "That's why you're fat!" I also think this when I'm buying food at the grocery store. I carpool with my mom and she has fibromalgia, so walking a lot hurts her, and she'll give me the money and ask me to go inside and buy her the biggest, meat-lovers deli pizza. I feel so self conscious having that thing in my cart. I just want to yell at people I walk by, "It's not for me!"

I can't wait until these thoughts are a thing of the past.

berryblondeboys
03-30-2012, 08:11 AM
You know one thing I thought of is that I won't feel embarrassed to take second helpings at a potluck or something. But that's not true either. Anywhere I go where they know I've lost weight they'll be watching me to see how much I eat and if I eat more than normally, they'll worry I'm probably gaining weight.

sacha
03-30-2012, 08:37 AM
Change through 25 outfits, stare at the waistband, and keep going until you find one that makes you look slimmer

Italiannie
03-30-2012, 08:53 AM
I'm hoping I won't look around a crowd of people to make sure I'm not the largest one in the group.

I know, I'm shallow and petty and horrible, but that is what I do sometimes - it's all about insecurity.

It doesn't matter to me at all what other people weigh, it's completely about "me" - I'm so embarrassed to admit this huge character flaw.

GlamourGirl827
03-30-2012, 09:56 AM
You know one thing I thought of is that I won't feel embarrassed to take second helpings at a potluck or something. But that's not true either. Anywhere I go where they know I've lost weight they'll be watching me to see how much I eat and if I eat more than normally, they'll worry I'm probably gaining weight.

^this^

I feel less monitored over my food choices in one way "Oh look at the SIZE of her helping, no wonder she's fat...
But now I feel like people are just thinking" Oh look at the size of her helping, she's going to regain that weight...

Its a lose lose situation!

ghlover
03-30-2012, 10:07 AM
Wear a tshirt/shorts/coverup over a bathing suit. Have you ever gone swimming in a giant wet cold tshirt over a bathing suit? Not fun and not attractive.

Yes I have unfortunately I have been there, I always do the big T shirt ting because I'm not comfortable with the way I look in a bathing suit and I wear a pair of men's swimming trunks over the bottom too just to hide my thighs :(
:mad::no:

berryblondeboys
03-30-2012, 10:09 AM
Yes I have unfortunately I have been there, I always do the big T shirt ting because I'm not comfortable with the way I look in a bathing suit and I wear a pair of men's swimming trunks over the bottom too just to hide my thighs :(
:mad::no:

And reality is - it doesn't make you look any better and just makes you stand out even more AND it points out how insecure you are.

Amy23
03-30-2012, 10:38 AM
I once broke part of a barstool at a Christmas party. At my husband's boss's house. Everyone heard the "crunch" and turned to stare at me. How embarrassing. :o I wasn't even anywhere near my highest weight! I've even lost 30 pounds since then but I'm still big enough for that to remain a possibility. :dizzy:

I'll have a better attitude about clothes shopping when I'm a smaller size. I'm not sure if I have a chip on my shoulder or what, but I just get extremely annoyed and irritated every time I step into a store with clothes. I wonder if they'll have anything that will fit me at all, let alone be somewhat flattering. It's really a pet peeve of mine to go into a store and see an entire wall of clothes, and realize that the teeny little section of only 5 or 6 racks is plus size, and then when I dive into that find out half of it is maternity. Although I suppose that's better than entering a store I've never visited and finding out they don't carry plus sizes at all. :(

I'm hoping I won't hide behind hoodies anymore. When I get smaller I'm going to make it a point not to buy them.

I've never actually broken a chair - and probably only because I am extremely mindful about what I sit on - but my best friend did about six months ago, in front of a roomful of friends, and it was awful. She was around 300 pounds at the time and the spindly metal legs just gave out and she hit the deck. I felt truly terrible for her as what happened was and still is one of my worst fears.

I also get your frustration about the sh*tty clothing options for plus-size women. It's like the designers of these clothes think we're not really worth it so they might as well dress us in curtains and shapeless sacks. Ew. Can't wait until I don't have these issues anymore, although the chair thing is so ingrained in me I don't know whether I'll ever be able to break the habit!

Elladorine
03-30-2012, 11:06 AM
I've never actually broken a chair - and probably only because I am extremely mindful about what I sit on - but my best friend did about six months ago, in front of a roomful of friends, and it was awful. She was around 300 pounds at the time and the spindly metal legs just gave out and she hit the deck. I felt truly terrible for her as what happened was and still is one of my worst fears.

I also get your frustration about the sh*tty clothing options for plus-size women. It's like the designers of these clothes think we're not really worth it so they might as well dress us in curtains and shapeless sacks. Ew. Can't wait until I don't have these issues anymore, although the chair thing is so ingrained in me I don't know whether I'll ever be able to break the habit!
Oh, that does sound so awful for your friend! :( I was lucky the whole thing didn't fall over or anything like that, it was just one of the little bars that connected the legs that snapped. It had been a long party, I didn't really know anyone there aside from my husband, and it was crowded with few places to sit. I was very uncomfortable on that very tall bar stool, and kept shifting my weight and using that little bar for support as I moved around (as I couldn't reach the floor as it was such a tall stool). Apparently my 285 pounds was too much for that little bar no matter how carefully and gently I tried to shift my weight! It's been five years now but I'll never forget how that felt. :(

I'm sort of surprised I didn't take out any seats at my highest weight of 360, but I probably wasn't social enough to worry about having to sit in too many strange chairs. I do recall having a hard time fitting in the seats of the local theater, that we'd often choose to drive to the next town over just because their seats were more "comfortable." I kinda wonder if I'd be ok in them now, but I've moved since then and it's not worth the 2000 mile trip to find out! :lol:

My husband has tried to be helpful with my clothes shopping in the past, but has learned to just let me wander off in the store on my own. ;) I hate being such a grouch about it, but even after explaining multiple times he still doesn't seem to understand the segregation going on. For example, I'll be marching toward the plus sizes, and he'll keep stopping to point out cute things hanging on the racks that he thinks would look good on me. But none of those things he points out will ever fit me. :( I tell him we're in the wrong section, that the sizes don't go high enough, and he'll ask me why we're even there then. And I point out that we have to walk through the "normal" stuff in order to get to the "crappy" stuff, and then he just tells me I'm being grouchy. :p I had a similar issue early on in our relationship the first few times we went to a mall. He'd want to take me into all the stores, but it's pretty pointless and even upsetting when you know that 90% of the stores refuse to cater to your size. :(

Amy23
03-30-2012, 11:20 AM
Oh, that does sound so awful for your friend! :( I was lucky the whole thing didn't fall over or anything like that, it was just one of the little bars that connected the legs that snapped. It had been a long party, I didn't really know anyone there aside from my husband, and it was crowded with few places to sit. I was very uncomfortable on that very tall bar stool, and kept shifting my weight and using that little bar for support as I moved around (as I couldn't reach the floor as it was such a tall stool). Apparently my 285 pounds was too much for that little bar no matter how carefully and gently I tried to shift my weight! It's been five years now but I'll never forget how that felt. :(

I'm sort of surprised I didn't take out any seats at my highest weight of 360, but I probably wasn't social enough to worry about having to sit in too many strange chairs. I do recall having a hard time fitting in the seats of the local theater, that we'd often choose to drive to the next town over just because their seats were more "comfortable." I kinda wonder if I'd be ok in them now, but I've moved since then and it's not worth the 2000 mile trip to find out! :lol:

My husband has tried to be helpful with my clothes shopping in the past, but has learned to just let me wander off in the store on my own. ;) I hate being such a grouch about it, but even after explaining multiple times he still doesn't seem to understand the segregation going on. For example, I'll be marching toward the plus sizes, and he'll keep stopping to point out cute things hanging on the racks that he thinks would look good on me. But none of those things he points out will ever fit me. :( I tell him we're in the wrong section, that the sizes don't go high enough, and he'll ask me why we're even there then. And I point out that we have to walk through the "normal" stuff in order to get to the "crappy" stuff, and then he just tells me I'm being grouchy. :p I had a similar issue early on in our relationship the first few times we went to a mall. He'd want to take me into all the stores, but it's pretty pointless and even upsetting when you know that 90% of the stores refuse to cater to your size. :(

Yes! It's honestly as if they shove us all into a shadowy little corner of the shop, away from all the "normal" people, so we won't take up too much room in the skinny section!

I find it really cute that your husband points out things he thinks would look cute on you! It's a shame he's completely clueless about the rules of women's fashion though, lol. You're right: 90% of stores, especially boutiques, will not cater for plus sizes. But what I find most depressing is the hideous state of plus-size fashion. I almost feel like starting a blog just to mock some of the things I've seen in local shops -- I truly think some people would be stunned by some of the things they're expecting plus-size women to wear. The clothes either resemble curtains or are else hideously inappropriate: Just last month I spotted a rack of purple and gold leopard-print mini-skirts in the plus-size section, going up to a size 26.

Now, if a big girl wants to wear a skirt like that then more power to her. But come on: How many big girls are actually going to wear something like that?

As for the cinema seat, I'm sure you'd fit into it just fine now! About four months ago I couldn't fit into the local cinema seats without shifting my a*se to one side. It was just too uncomfortable. But yesterday I saw a movie there for the first time since then and fitted into the seats just fine! Mind you it wasn't particularly roomy but I no longer have bruises on my hips the next morning!

P.S. Your weight loss is inspirational! Congrats!

Only Me
03-30-2012, 11:34 AM
The only person who has broken a chair in my house is my (then) 35lb 3 year old. It was the way she was trying to sit in it and push it around at the same time I think. One leg snapped right off. I've since repaired that chair and someone else is sitting on it problem free. :) The 3yo (now 4) has her booster seat on a different kind of chair now. ;)

I'd like to say that there are things I do now that I won't do when I'm thinner, but I really can't think of any. I was down to 120ish between my last two pregnancies, which is pretty slim for me, and the only thing that I can think I did differently was sometimes being able to buy bras in Winners (TJ Maxx) or other regular stores. I still wore running shorts as bathing suit bottoms and I was still more comfortable with a shirt over top of my bathing suit (not while swimming though). Being thinner does not make me more comfortable about my body.

Amy8888
03-30-2012, 12:14 PM
I'll have a better attitude about clothes shopping when I'm a smaller size. I'm not sure if I have a chip on my shoulder or what, but I just get extremely annoyed and irritated every time I step into a store with clothes. I wonder if they'll have anything that will fit me at all, let alone be somewhat flattering. It's really a pet peeve of mine to go into a store and see an entire wall of clothes, and realize that the teeny little section of only 5 or 6 racks is plus size, and then when I dive into that find out half of it is maternity. Although I suppose that's better than entering a store I've never visited and finding out they don't carry plus sizes at all. :(

I'm hoping I won't hide behind hoodies anymore. When I get smaller I'm going to make it a point not to buy them.

I love your avatar, Elladorine! I so identified with that video when it was out in 93. I was going off to college and was hoping to find my own fellow bumblebees (and I did!).

Anyway, I agree with you. My answer to this question is that I wouldn't buy clothes I didn't really like if I were thinner. I had my third baby a few months ago so right now I mostly look for clothes to camouflage my belly. I don't want to buy clothes to hide something, I want to buy clothes because I love them!

sontaikle
03-30-2012, 01:05 PM
I used to have to buy several pairs of the same pants if I really liked them. My thighs would rub together and I would wear out the thighs on the pants :(

I still have some unworn pairs.

Elladorine
03-30-2012, 02:17 PM
Yes! It's honestly as if they shove us all into a shadowy little corner of the shop, away from all the "normal" people, so we won't take up too much room in the skinny section!

I find it really cute that your husband points out things he thinks would look cute on you! It's a shame he's completely clueless about the rules of women's fashion though, lol. You're right: 90% of stores, especially boutiques, will not cater for plus sizes. But what I find most depressing is the hideous state of plus-size fashion. I almost feel like starting a blog just to mock some of the things I've seen in local shops -- I truly think some people would be stunned by some of the things they're expecting plus-size women to wear. The clothes either resemble curtains or are else hideously inappropriate: Just last month I spotted a rack of purple and gold leopard-print mini-skirts in the plus-size section, going up to a size 26.

Now, if a big girl wants to wear a skirt like that then more power to her. But come on: How many big girls are actually going to wear something like that?

As for the cinema seat, I'm sure you'd fit into it just fine now! About four months ago I couldn't fit into the local cinema seats without shifting my a*se to one side. It was just too uncomfortable. But yesterday I saw a movie there for the first time since then and fitted into the seats just fine! Mind you it wasn't particularly roomy but I no longer have bruises on my hips the next morning!

P.S. Your weight loss is inspirational! Congrats!
I think the worst experience I ever had with clothes was at Macy's. I was looking for a new swimsuit and found nothing in my size, so I figured my best bet was to find the plus sized section in hopes that they had additional suits up there. It was on a whole other floor of course, completely away from all the other women's fashions, tucked in by the housewares. A sales clerk saw me looking around and asked if I needed help. I explained I was looking for swim suits, and she told me I was completely in the wrong section. And when I started to explain I'd already been through them on the other floor, she looked me up and down and snidely cut me off with, "Well, we wouldn't have anything that would fit you anyway." I walked away in a huff and cried about it once I got to the car. I figured Macy's was the place to go since I was able to find a perfect swim suit there at my highest weight not long before. She could have more politely explained they weren't currently carrying plus sized suits if that's what I was looking for, something like that, but with the way she said what she did it certainly came off as an insult. That was three years ago and I still refuse to shop at that location. :p

And I agree, most of the crap they design for plus sizes is just atrocious! Some of it might be forgivable if they didn't use such loud, crazy prints (like the mini skirts you described, yikes)! Some scoff at some of the clothes seen on peopleofwalmart but maybe they can't find much else to wear? If anyone should get attacked, it's the designers who made some of those things in the first place. :p

I probably would fit the seat now . . . I'm an apple so my butt's one of the smallest things on me. ;) Then again it was the arms of the seats that were the real killer; I'd sort of have to slide in sideways and turn forward as I sat down since it would cut into the sides of my tummy. :dizzy: I haven't had that problem in ages, thankfully . . . about the only issue I've had since was fitting on an old amusment park ride. The bar would simply not lock in place over my stomach, but I was bigger then too so who knows. It's just one of those things we sometimes have to work on.

And thanks! :hug: The progress has been so slow that it's sometimes hard to believe I was ever any different of a size that I am now. :dizzy:

I love your avatar, Elladorine! I so identified with that video when it was out in 93. I was going off to college and was hoping to find my own fellow bumblebees (and I did!).

Anyway, I agree with you. My answer to this question is that I wouldn't buy clothes I didn't really like if I were thinner. I had my third baby a few months ago so right now I mostly look for clothes to camouflage my belly. I don't want to buy clothes to hide something, I want to buy clothes because I love them!
Aw, thanks! It's funny, but I didn't discover the song until 1996 or so, when I was rummaging through my brother's CD's looking to make some mix tapes (wow, I so would have died for something like an iPod back then, lol). Our cable didn't offer MTV back in the day so most music videos were kind of foreign to me. :dizzy: Anyway, I didn't actually see the music video until sometime around 1999 when we first got VH1, and until then only knew the bee girl as the cover for the album. Just loved the video and wanted to find my fellow bees too (and so glad to hear you found yours)! It popped up in my head for some reason a few months back and I decided to draw my own version. :D I eventually realized that it was perfect to represent this journey I'm on and made it my avatar. http://i41.tinypic.com/24q4c9z.gif

Yeah, that's pretty much my problem too. It's not often that I get to buy anything just because I like it, it's because I'm desperate for something that isn't worn out or faded or shrunken or stretched . . . and it's something to camouflage my body with, not something I enjoy. I so want to enjoy clothes right now but it's so hard when it feels like nothing fits or looks right anyway, and I have to settle on something that covers me adequately.

MiZTaCCen
03-30-2012, 04:05 PM
When I was thin I didn't care what I put in my mouth...now when I eat something I wonder if people are looking at me going. Should that fatty really be eating that? Also when I'm home I wonder when I eat something if my mom will say something about it because I'm "fat".

Thats about it...lol

wanttobeinvienna
03-30-2012, 04:34 PM
Things I do at my current weight that I wouldn't do thin?

Avoid large crowds.
Avoid any parties that involve bathing suits.
Avoid mirrors.
Over do make up and hair ritual because I think it would pull the attention up and away from my stomach region.
Use tanning lotions- because tan fat has to look better than white fat.
Avoid sitting to close to someone, sitting on a lap, leaning on someone or having them help me up off a chair or the ground. I don't want someone to feel my full weight.
Cut to the chase by making a fat joke so that the people around me know that I know that I am overweight.

Porthardygurl
03-30-2012, 05:39 PM
well lets see...

I wouldnt have to put talcum powder under my breasts, on my tummy or my back to absorb the sweat because i sweat horendously from all this fat im carrying around..

I wouldnt have to go into a plus size clothing store anymore..

I wouldnt have to take up two bus seats instead 1 would do me just fine..

I wouldnt have to forgo my favorite ride at the fair because i would fit in the chair.

I would no longer hide my face in shame when someone takes a picture of me...

I would no longer cut up all the pictures i have of me being fat

I would no longer be called "the different one" or the "bigger one" or the "bigger boned one"

I would no longer have to worry about my legs chafing because they smoosh together when i walk.

I would no longer have to worry about my pants sliding down my bum in public because they would actually fit my entire body instead of just parts of my body.

I would no longer have to ask for the bigger size or the biggest size they have.

I would no longer have to shop for granny panties..i could get girly panties instead.

Taking back control
03-30-2012, 11:13 PM
I don't shop with other people. I am too embarrassed about my size and don't want others to know how big I am. And I too always look around the room as I hate being the biggest one in the room.

Goody3shoes
04-02-2012, 10:23 AM
All of the above.
Chairs, when they look flimsy are my enemy! I'm always scared of clothes shopping, it's like a nightmare and I hide from mirrors like I'm a vampire. It's ridiculous. Going in to try clothing, is my most dreaded event. The neon lights that make everyone look horrible don't help anything and the stores with mirrors on the pillars and things in random places so if you turn in the wrong direction you get a full view of just how unattractive you are in the clothes your already wearing! Then pulling out something because the print of the color looks pretty and realizing it's too small and I get this weird feeling of shame and hurriedly put it back so no one sees me and thinks "oh look at the fat girl who thinks she can fit into normal sized clothes, why's she even in this department, the fat sections over there." I know people don't think this...i mean...i hope people don't think this? Do they? OH GOD! NO PANIC ATTACK!
And then the going swimming, I've always had an issue with this, even when I was skinny because I've always had gigantic boobs and have never found a suit that actually fits and boys used to stare when I would go to the pool. I hate the feeling of a wet t-shirt, so I end up making a big production of it because I get into the water and lift the shirt as I get in so it doesn't get wet, but the water is covering what the shirt isn't and when I'm entirely in, hold the shirt above my head over to the side and toss it so it doesn't get too wet, but i can still reach it so I can reverse the process on the way out, i figure the water is obscuring enough if I make sure my body is underwater at all times.

The eating in public is awful, or when I go to dinner with family or skinny friends or what's worse, my fiances family, Buffets are the worst because your supposed to eat a lot, but if I eat a lot I just know in my fat mind that they will judge me for eating when I'm a fat girl. And it sucks cause it didn't bother me when I was skinny...which might be why i'm not anymore.... hmmm

Having people help me, physically. I slipped a disc in my spine two years ago and sometimes I'm not so good at walking or standing or existing and my fiance and friends have to help me up off the floor quite a bit or help me get up the stairs (we live on the third floor) or help me to get out of bed, or into or out of the shower or well just about anything you can think of there are times my body refuses to let me do it and I need help and it stresses me out because I'm so heavy I'm afraid they'll get hurt trying to lift me or pull something trying to help me up. I feel like maybe they should just get a forklift to lift this giant cow in heat as my grama calls me.

Bah.

usmcvet
04-02-2012, 03:38 PM
Broken chairs, broken toilet seats, not fitting in chairs, forget the bathroom on an airplane. Always look for chairs w/o arms and always ask for a table at a restaurant, 99% of booths are not big enough and when they are it leaves my kids/wife too far away from the table because I've moved the table or bench to get it to work for me.

I don't try shoes on at the store anymore. I know my size and buy and go or buy online. I've been embarrassed twice having difficulty tying my shoe in the store. Never again.

I wear a t shirt, suspenders and a shirt over the suspenders. Flying is a PITA for everyone, but the metal detector is a real pain. I bought a belt w/o any metal in it so I can wear my suspenders and belt through the metal detector. On flying days I wear sneakers tied very loosely so I can slip them on and off and still have the comfort and support of the sneakers for the often long walks through the airport.

Lunula
04-03-2012, 11:58 AM
Before even putting on a t-shirt I used to stretch it out and then put it on. I was doing some sort of t-shirt gymnatics to stretch it out as much as I could, and then after I had it on, there was more stretching. :(

Also, when I found a sweater or something that fit and didn't look horrible, I would buy 2 or 3 of them because I knew I'd be wearing them constantly and would wear out faster - and the thought of shopping made me sick on many levels.

tikanique
04-03-2012, 05:55 PM
There's a chain of stores in the metro Detroit area called Rainbow that actually has cute, stylish plus size clothes. The quality (fabric choices) are not as nice as what you'd find at Macy's but when I'd have somewhere to go on a weekend, say a bar-b-cue, family reunion, I could get something cute, size and age appropriate without spending a lot of money.

tikanique
04-03-2012, 05:56 PM
Oh, the other thing I do (did) was only use the handicap stall at the bathroom. Has anyone else noticed that bathroom stalls are getting smaller and smaller and smaller? what the heck is up with that?!?!?

summerlove
04-03-2012, 06:42 PM
- Worry about eating in public
- Worry about meeting new people
- Worry about trying on clothes at popular/trendy stores with loads of skinny customers

mariposssa
04-03-2012, 06:55 PM
One thing I used get sometimes and already don't have to worry about now is people looking at me and then looking in my cart and judging me based on what I'm buying at the grocery. I buy healthy stuff. AND, how rude is that anyway?!

Same thing about being in a restaurant or social gathering and worrying about what or how much you are putting on your plate.

I have avoided some events reunions, weddings, holiday parties, too. Some because I didn't want to see some of those people and others because of the thought of finding a dress, the buffet or eating, the dance floor, etc.

usmcvet
04-03-2012, 08:06 PM
Oh, the other thing I do (did) was only use the handicap stall at the bathroom. Has anyone else noticed that bathroom stalls are getting smaller and smaller and smaller? what the heck is up with that?!?!?

I only use the HP stalls too. :o

Pepino
04-04-2012, 02:14 PM
Whenever I sit on the couch at someone's house I always grab a throw pillow and casually hold it on my lap like I'm just lounging but really I'm hiding how bad my stomach looks when I sit!!! And I'm not far from my goal weight but that region still doesn't look good and I can feel it jiggle as I walk.

VenomousPiano
04-04-2012, 09:33 PM
Whenever I sit on the couch at someone's house I always grab a throw pillow and casually hold it on my lap like I'm just lounging but really I'm hiding how bad my stomach looks when I sit!!! And I'm not far from my goal weight but that region still doesn't look good and I can feel it jiggle as I walk.

^I do that all the time. :)

It seems that no matter how much I lose, my stomach pouch is always mockingly laughing at me... pillow cover-up is my savior!

Mrshonopolist
04-05-2012, 02:53 PM
I used to have to buy several pairs of the same pants if I really liked them. My thighs would rub together and I would wear out the thighs on the pants :(

I still have some unworn pairs.

I have the same problem! It sucks big time only takes like 3-4 months to do :(

neon_zephyr
04-06-2012, 02:39 AM
Dress badly. When I gain weight, I tend to wear baggier and more unappealing clothes. I'm working on this by maintaining and updating my wardrobe to remove too-big clothes; that pressures me to either lose or maintain but not gain.

Wear my hair longer. It hides my neck fat. But, long hair annoys me, so I wear it clipped back and that's just hideous. I'm working on this and deliberately styling my hair every day.

Wear ugly shoes. It feels painful to wear high heels when you're carrying extra weight. I"m working on this, though, and now wear heels every day. It's a reality check and reminder for me.

Bloopers
04-06-2012, 03:46 AM
-Hiding how wide my legs are with my purse or something when I'm on the bus (I have short legs, to make the problem even worse.)
-Day dreaming about the possibilities of clothes that I could wear if I was slimmer.
-Being afraid to bust a wheel on a bike.
-Feeling uncomfortable if I'm the biggest person in the room. (I go to a school full of athletic people that are fit. Rarely do I see a fat person galloping around campus.)
-One thing I really hate is that when I wear shorts and walk around, they start rising up in my inner thighs and I'd have to pull that out every once in a while. Tired of my thighs rubbing together!

Several years ago when I went back to my country, some friends and I would go around the city riding our rented bikes. Thing is, it was a two-person bike and I ended up with this skinny guy in front of me. As we were riding around, the medal bar kinda busted along with the wheel in the back (where I was sitting) and we had to come to a full stop. How embarrassing that was!

TiffNeedsChange
04-06-2012, 04:03 AM
-getting angry when I try to find business casual clothes at my usual clothing store that has 3/4 of the store dedicated to normal sizes and the other 1/4 dedicated to a Shorty array of normal sizes.
-feeling different than everyone else
-feelingwhat self conscious about the way I look while riding my bike, swimming, or just existing for that matter
-examiningif chairs, spaces etc to make sure I will fit before I try.. having to take a different route between cars in parking lots is embarrassing
-plenty of other things that I will list later!

RicecakeEater
04-06-2012, 11:37 AM
I used to pull my pants up to/over my belly button to hide any stomach fat. I still do sometimes, but my stomach fat is one of the first things to go and it's almost gone. (Hallelujah!)

I used to hate walking places with friends. Don't get me wrong, I loved my friends, and I love walking around the city, but I hated either A) being far behind or B) being out of breath. I felt like being out of breath was gross. I used to try my best to breathe quietly, and still maintain conversation. A lot of the time I would catch my nostrils flaring because they needed to take in more oxygen, and I was killing myself trying not to do that. It was sad, because I could hardly even enjoy myself. Now I can walk side-by-side with my friends without a thought. It feels GOOD. :D

I remember for pictures, I was always trying to position my face in a way that would flatter my neck. Sometimes my head would look VERY stupid flopping around for pictures. I was the most self conscious about my face/neck weight. If I looked fat up there, I was unbearably fat everywhere else. I always envied the fat girls with the slim faces. That is NOT me. Now I just let the photographer point and shoot- I'm always curious to see how I look just naturally. I never look that bad. It hasn't quite sunk in, haha.

When I used to take the bus, I used to be worried about being the 'fat girl who took all the room' so I would squish myself together as much as I could and would therefore be extremely uncomfortable the whole ride. Now I just walk to class, and thank heavens lol.

I was obviously a pretty insecure kid. :dizzy:

mirax3
04-09-2012, 10:35 PM
Trying not to bend over in public because I am afraid that the muffin top being sucked in by my jeans will be let loose for everyone to see!

Standing awkwardly thinking everyone is staring at your fat if you ever have to stand in a public place.

I can't wait to lose the last of this dang weight!!

HERMIONY
04-10-2012, 07:34 AM
when i was bigger i always tried to find clothes to hide my body, now i always make sure they are tight and shoe off my body!

MosesMom1
04-10-2012, 01:38 PM
My husband has tried to be helpful with my clothes shopping in the past, but has learned to just let me wander off in the store on my own. ;) I hate being such a grouch about it, but even after explaining multiple times he still doesn't seem to understand the segregation going on. For example, I'll be marching toward the plus sizes, and he'll keep stopping to point out cute things hanging on the racks that he thinks would look good on me. But none of those things he points out will ever fit me. :( I tell him we're in the wrong section, that the sizes don't go high enough, and he'll ask me why we're even there then. And I point out that we have to walk through the "normal" stuff in order to get to the "crappy" stuff, and then he just tells me I'm being grouchy. :p I had a similar issue early on in our relationship the first few times we went to a mall. He'd want to take me into all the stores, but it's pretty pointless and even upsetting when you know that 90% of the stores refuse to cater to your size. :(

Oh my God I know exactly how this feels!!! I haven't been to the mall in 3 years because last time I went, I realized only one store (Torrid) had size 20's. And the worst part was the clothes are SO overpriced!!!!! :mad:

Exhale15
04-10-2012, 01:47 PM
I will be so happy to have a flat toned middle. When that will happen....? But I'm feeling silly wearing a longer layer under my top when I practice yoga or pilates in fear of some softness peaking out :o

Natasha22
04-11-2012, 11:11 AM
Well, I have this compulsive behavior of pulling down my shirts all the time because I'm afraid my belly is going to show. Even when the shirts I'm wearing are clearly long enough to cover everything, I still stretch them down, "just to be sure". Once I lose all this belly fat and get more toned, hopefully this behavior will go away.

gypsy137
04-11-2012, 11:25 AM
Paint my toe nails without having to get in weird positions to do so. Also not using the bend in my knee{leg} to hold the polish bottle. LOL I know thats sounds aweful.

berryblondeboys
04-11-2012, 11:34 AM
Paint my toe nails without having to get in weird positions to do so. Also not using the bend in my knee{leg} to hold the polish bottle. LOL I know thats sounds aweful.

I decided I'm going to paint my toenails this summer. I haven't even TRIED since I was in high school and I only tried once - I'm 42 - that's a LONG TIME of no pretty toenails. Doesn't help I have the oddest toes See here for a visual:

http://melissaslife42.blogspot.com/2011/04/my-feet-are-problem-with-my-shins.html (too funny, I wrote that a year and one day ago. And wow - my feet were so chubby!)

Wonder if I will still paint them like a 2 year old with being unable to keep the paint ON THE NAIL!!!

Anssett
04-11-2012, 05:25 PM
I would LOVE to not compare myself to every other girl in the room to make sure I'm not the biggest. I notice this most often during dance classes because we're all wearing light clothes foe good movement and there are lots of mirrors. Even so, it DOESN'T MATTER!!! I'm there to enjoy my body and use it.

Gabe
04-11-2012, 07:03 PM
Seat gauging is a big one, but as a sort of tangent to that? Bringing my own seat belt extender when I fly.

Yeah. For serious. I had my own that I'd stow inside of my suitcase (I one-bag, so everything's a carry-on). I had a complicated sequence of top-secret moves to get it from the outside pocket of the bag to my pocket, and then to slip it out and into place without drawing too much attention to myself. I was like a very fat, very clumsy ninja.

Flying at 360+? You better believe I had an extender. And thankfully, I also had my mom in the seat next to me, so I didn't have to freak out too much about encroaching on her space. Flying at around 320-ish? Extender, if only just. Kind of disheartening when you've been on plan for four months, and you still need the stupid thing. Flying at 239? I might've been the only person in coach who was happy about how roomy the seat was! No extender.

Sitting like a normal person. I like to have my leg curled underneath me, or drawn to my chest, or resting on something. I climb. It's like I'm allergic to the floor or something. This worked fine at my low weight (high school) in the 190s. This was less fine at 360. It's now mostly fine again, but I still have to be a little careful. But I can now still usually sit like a freak.

The lift-the-belly wash. You guys know what I'm talking about. Or some of you do, at least. You know, the thing where you lift your belly when you shower because otherwise you just know it's gonna get all gross. I hope I get to the point where I don't have to do that.

Shopping at Lane Bryant. I'm starting to get close-ish to that point, as I'm now in their 14s. It's a little daunting, as Lane Bryant/Fashion Bug/Torrid have been my mainstays for ages (less Torrid after they became a more expensive Fashion Bug, but still). I don't think I actively consider shopping other places now, and that'll be an adjustment. One I'm glad to make, but still...

WilloW176
04-11-2012, 10:08 PM
I always get a cushion to hide my stomach and how my tights become HUGE when i sit down.
Also I would have to wear baggy clothes, or be self-conscious about how the clothes I'm wearing make me look fat.
And the chair thing actually happened to me at school in front of the WHOLE HIGH SCHOOL, it was so embarrassing.

lyv33
04-21-2012, 07:10 PM
I once broke part of a barstool at a Christmas party. At my husband's boss's house. Everyone heard the "crunch" and turned to stare at me. How embarrassing. :o I wasn't even anywhere near my highest weight! I've even lost 30 pounds since then but I'm still big enough for that to remain a possibility. :dizzy:

I'll have a better attitude about clothes shopping when I'm a smaller size. I'm not sure if I have a chip on my shoulder or what, but I just get extremely annoyed and irritated every time I step into a store with clothes. I wonder if they'll have anything that will fit me at all, let alone be somewhat flattering. It's really a pet peeve of mine to go into a store and see an entire wall of clothes, and realize that the teeny little section of only 5 or 6 racks is plus size, and then when I dive into that find out half of it is maternity. Although I suppose that's better than entering a store I've never visited and finding out they don't carry plus sizes at all. :(


I'm hoping I won't hide behind hoodies anymore. When I get smaller I'm going to make it a point not to buy them.

You won't even go near a hoodie. I use to be the same way. I like fitted clothes now. I don't like them even a tiny bit loose on me and you will feel the same way.

lyv33
04-21-2012, 07:12 PM
I had a friend in high school years ago that would tell her boyfriend a smaller size to buy for her (if he was buying clothes as a gift) and then she would return them for the larger size that she was. Heck, he could see what she looked like and knew how big/small she actually was. The size is just a mental thing with us.

lyv33
04-21-2012, 07:15 PM
I haven't tried to paint my tow nails yet since losing 28 lbs. I think I might try that tonight. It always hurt my belly to bend over to do it before.

samcakes
04-22-2012, 12:33 AM
my family has what we like to call 'the campbell buttcrack' it shows no matter what we wear, and at my size it is hard to find a belt that fits, so to cover the problem, i buy high waisted jeans, and i wear very long shirts, sometimes i will even go to ross, or fashion bug, or wherever, and buy a dress, then cut it down so it is long enough for me to move around comfortably without anyone seeing my business. when i am smaller, im hoping that wont be as big of a problem.

at least at a small size i can wear a effin belt!!

COchick
04-22-2012, 01:14 AM
Change my outfit eleventy-billion times before I'm satisfied. I've always thought (or maybe just imagined) that skinny women throw something on and go, and always look fabulous. With me, I'm constantly checking for muffin top, back fat, etc.

usmcvet
04-22-2012, 10:09 PM
I wear a t shirt, suspenders and another shirt, usually a policy shirt untuxked. I look forward to ditching the suspenders and second shirt.

Laifierr
04-22-2012, 10:28 PM
How about things I don't do as a fat person that I wish I could do if I were thin?

Being fat, I haaaaate buying clothes. Normally I buy men's pants because they look better on me. All the plus size clothes for women I find are kinda frumpy and "fitted" (just what I want to show off how fat I am with some nice fitted pants). If I were thin I wouldn't be restricted with what I can wear and I would looove to just take something off the rack and know it will fit. Being my size, even certain pants marked my size I can't fit in when I know that that is my size. =(

Being fat, when I am out exercising, hiking some trails. I will often find the nearest bench and "relax" while I wait for a group of skinny people go passed me. I am always embarrassed that I can't keep up the pace.

Being fat, I have to buy men's shoes because my feet are too fat to fit into cute women's shoes. =( I would love to wear cute sandals or heels, but they don't fit =( I would also love to wear boots that go up the knee, but my calves are way too big.

Ok, so most of my gripes are about not being able to wear something that I'd absolutely love to wear one day. =P

Being fat, you'd never see me in a bikini, much less any sort of swimsuit. If I went swimming it was men's trunks and a t-shirt.

I want to be skinny so I can wear whatever I want to wear. =) I love clothes, I just can't buy them for the fat me =/

want2bskine
04-23-2012, 04:06 PM
I do the sit on the couch and put a pillow over my belly thing. I also tie a light jacket around my waist to look smaller, but I think it makes me look bigger. I remember trying to buy some boots for winter a year or two ago and all of them I tried on would not zip all the way up! Talk about being embarrassed. I avoid short tops, and I hate when my tshirts shrink. I have also put my tops on and stretched them out using my bed post lol. For summer I would buy shorts to go over my bathing suit, or buy the little tie on skirt things, unless I bought a bathing suit bottom that was a skirt....and yeah get a tan. I'm sorry but I think a tan or a healthy color makes you look better lol.