Self Sabotage..?
After years of getting to this point more times than I want to admit.. I had to stop and wonder. Am I self sabotaging? Anyone that has seen the Biggest Loser knows what I mean.. That one fear or expectation or whatever that subconsciously stops you in your tracks. That stops you from reaching your goals. The trainers seem great at making people not only realize what their big fear is, but also overcoming it. you can be doing great, losing consistently, feeling great.. And then, like an invisible wall *SMACK*
I'm pretty sure I know what mine is. I'd barely admit this to my best friends, but here it's easier. The sad fact is, I've been really overweight (like, obese most of the time) my whole life. Guys have never paid any attention to me. It's always hurt a lot, but I've always acted like I didn't care. It's easier that way. The truth is, my greatest hope for losing weight is that guys will start to show an interest. I know that's not supposed to be my reason, but it is. Yes I've loved getting to wear clothes I couldn't have before. But how can a guy (ANY guy!) liking me not be a legitimate reason? Isn't companionship what we all need? It's human nature. I get that we shouldn't want the guy who will only like a skinny girl, but people need to be attracted to someone. I get it. I don't even blame guys for that.
I think my invisible wall is the fear that even if I lost all the weight I want to, I still won't get the attention I wish I had. I know this sounds like the worst reason, but it's hard to describe unless you've been in this position..
So, long story short.. Anyone else have an "invisible wall?" That fear that always stops you from achieving that last hurdle to your goal? What are your reasons for self sabotage?
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