Dieting with Obstacles - Dealing with Rejection

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02-23-2012, 05:11 PM
Hey guys. So I am having trouble not eating a giant box of entemanns right now. After months of freaking out and checking the mailbox every day for responses from graduate schools...I just got a response. And I got rejected from U Michigan Ann Arbor. I am so nervouse because I thought that was going to be one of my safe schools. I just can't help thinking that I am not going to get into ANY graduate program and then what? I have a BA in history, I need to go to grad school in order to get a job with my degree. If I don't get into any grad school I will have to restructure my whole life plan...what job I want where I want to live...I'll have to go to school for something completely different. As a giant emotional eater this is just really really difficult right now. I know I am overreacting, I applied to like 6 schools and only heard back from one. But I was already lacking so much confidence in my ability to get accepted into a school and there is nothing worse than expecting something bad to happen...and then it happens.

02-23-2012, 05:18 PM
Go for a run or do some sort of exercise. It will get your frustrations out. As you said, you still have 5 more opportunities so don't panic. Just distract yourself so you do not go on an emotional food binge.

02-23-2012, 06:57 PM
I don't know if it is the same for grad schools but when I applied to nursing school, my safe school rejected me. I was later waitlisten and As it got closer to the beginning of the semester I then finally got a permanent spot :) so it was super stressful but it worked out in the end. Something else to think about it something's just aren't meant to be- that school probably wasn't your best match since it was sort of a back up. Good luck

02-23-2012, 07:53 PM
Of course you are stressed and worried.

According to "Life is Hard, Food is Easy" -- That's emotional eating of the heart hunger kind where you want comfort and nurture. Why not go do something else that is self nurturing? Give yourself a sugar scrub facial for instance. Or a nice long soak in the tub. Listen to music by candle light.

It doesn't have to BE a box binge, esp when there's still more letters waiting to come.


02-23-2012, 10:17 PM
I know it's hard when your plan gets derailed. My husband got his bachelor's and master's degrees in Psychology with the intention completing his PhD., but he didn't get in anywhere because many programs have tighter budgets. Whereas a program may have admitted 20 out of 200 applicants, now they may only admit 10 out of 200. Of course you're stressed, but I promise that this is not the end. I can't tell you how many hours that we have spent freaking out because both of our life plans got derailed after we finished our master's degrees. Also, graduate school, in our case, caused our school loan debt to balloon, which we had not anticipated. Finding a job in our fields was nearly impossible, and starting salaries are super low right now, even with one or more master's degrees. (Don't panic, though. Eventually things work out!)

Anyway, try to journal a bit. Think about all of the ways that you might grow as a person if you don't get in to graduate school. I know that sounds crazy, but it helps. Also, you may be able to reapply next year. It sounds like a long time, and you'll enter repayment on any student loans that you many have, but it isn't as long as it sounds in terms of your whole life. What are some other things that you haven't been able to enjoy while you've been busy with school?

In the meantime, try to think positively even when it's hard. I find it helpful to give myself mental pep talks. I also tend to give them to others. Say things like, "I'm the best candidate for this program. They'd be crazy not to accept me. That spot is my spot. I'll get into the school that best fits my needs." Etc. Also, maybe work in a little pep talk about how a setback in this may actually help you. It takes a lot of work, but if you keep it up you'll feel better.

Good luck! I hope that you get your acceptance letter soon! :-)

02-24-2012, 10:56 PM
:hug: That must have been very disappointing. But what good will eating do? I think that SensualSiren's advice to journal about what else you can do if you don't get into any of the programs you applied to is sound. Things don't always work out like we think they will, so it's good to already have some ideas about what to do if/when things happen. Thinking about that sort of thing usually helps me calm down and feel better when I get stressed about a disappointment or a period of uncertainty.

Just out of curiosity, what do you want to do?

02-24-2012, 11:03 PM
Even if that school was your safe choice, you never know what happened and you don't really know exactly what admissions is looking for in particular. They might see something they really like and then you won't even care about your safe bet. =)

02-24-2012, 11:16 PM
Your news bites but in reality admissions looks at so many factors,some of which believe it or not have little to do with you.

A friend of mine living in the northeast desperately wanted to go to a particular school in the northeast. Rejected 2 different years, she did a litttle research and decided her best solution was to move to the midwest. This she did and wham was accepted to that northeast school on the third try. Personally there is no school that I would want to attend that much.

I would suggest you analyze your situation and perhaps try some different aproaches. You never know what might strike a responsive cord on the Gods that decide to admit . Good luck.

In the meantime keep your skills polished and do meaningful things to enhance your overall position.


02-24-2012, 11:28 PM
When God closes one door, he opens other and it turns out to be better than you have planned. You will witness the same. If that happens, pl send personal message to me, as i am a beliver and i want to see whether my belief is true.

02-24-2012, 11:46 PM

And if it helps UofM is really tough to get into :(