General chatter - Confession: I hate my job




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FreeBird3
02-21-2012, 02:16 AM
I just need to vent. I know that I'm lucky in the sense that I'm employed while many others aren't in this crazy economy.

I hate my job. I've been with my current employer for almost 6 years now. I've had some good bosses and have been fortunate to move around a few times within the company. Yet nothing feels "right" to me.

I've been working in my field for 8 years now. I'm in the mid 30s now. I've never experienced that "Ah HA!" moment in terms of thinking this is what I really want to do in life.

The stink of it is that I get a lot of perks for being with my current employer for nearly 6 years. Specifically, I get an entire month off from work, good health/dental/vision insurance, and decent 401K. If I jump to another company, then I'm back to square one regarding how much PTO I have and what not.

I just wish I could find a career that I'm passionate about instead of JUST a job. I'm almost 34 years old and all I know is what I'm doing is not what I want to be doing.

Sometimes I cry on the commute home from work. I keep on reading job ads on several job boards, but nothing really appeals to me. I have a mortgage, so I'm "stuck" with having to make a certain amount of income for the time being.

I just want to feel happy in my career. I know some of my emotional eating stems from not being happy with the work that I do.

I just want that "AH HA" moment regarding knowing what career/job I want and that I'm damn good at.

Even though I've been doing roughly the same type of work for nearly 8 years, I don't have much work confidence. This is due to having been sexually harassed by my former boss at my former employment back in 2006. I reported him and he was fired, but it took the company almost one year to get rid of him. During that time, many of the employees (i.e. his group of 10 to 12 men) would berate me in meetings...nothing direct, but more snarky comments about my work and how I didn't know what I was doing. Being that it was my first job out of grad school, I really took it to heart. I guess I'm still trying to recover from it.

I'm rambling now. I just feel lonely. This Pacific Northwest weather is finally getting to me. I miss my family and friends back home on the east coast.

I just want to be happy and find peace for once.


Lovely
02-21-2012, 02:20 AM
:hug: :hug: :hug:

TiffNeedsChange
02-21-2012, 03:12 AM
I totally feel your pain and :( do you have many other job type options with your degree? I was stuck before, quit for the same job at a new company and it was somewhat of a step down and back (no benefits etc) and I was still unhappy. Now I am back in school because there wasn't much I could do with my bachelor's degree. It is hard when you are "stuck" because of bills. I hope you find something that makes you happy. Maybe until then do little things to make your workspace more personal like putting up pictures of family, have certain air fresheners, fresh flowers etc on your desk. Maybe even brew and sip some tea to relax if you're feeling tense.


ICUwishing
02-21-2012, 08:12 AM
I could have written this post a year ago! Recommendation: "Finding Your Own North Star" by Martha Beck. It's an amazing book, and I have to say, I have read a LOT of self-help books. This one can teach you how to recognize the waypoints of how to choose which way to go. It's an easy read, but the exercises can rip you up if you've spent a lifetime doing what everyone else wants. It may not be your work, it might just be the environment you're doing it in.

A year after reading it, I've changed jobs, wow, yes, it IS twice! And I'm dialed in on the pieces of my job that I really enjoy. A lot of people told me not to take this most recent one (including my mom), but I was confident that I was on the right path. No regrets!

Beach Patrol
02-21-2012, 10:38 AM
Awwww!!!! :hug:

I'm so sorry you're in such a crappy situation. I'm the opposite - I LOVE my job! - I make "barely OK" money, & have great benefits! -but haven't had a raise since 2008 & always the possibility of company being "shut down" or "merged" with another, which would mean crazy changes that I probably wouldn't appreciate.

I've had jobs where I made better money in the past; but I either hated the work or the people I worked with... always something! - by far, I'd much rather have a job I love, working with people I really like & make little money than the other way around. Money can't buy happiness, but neither can being poor! It's hard to find the happy medium!!

Good luck to you - I know it's a hard decision!

XLMuffnTop
02-21-2012, 11:54 AM
Do you have something you're interested in? You may take lessons or classes in something that truly makes you happy and see if you can't build it into a career.

I'm in Finance and shove in going to art school part time. I won't be able to graduate at this slow pace until 2016 but I get through my work because I know twice a week I get to have my creative outlet and I'm working towards a job that makes me happy.

I also have a friend that has been self taught glass blowing. He's slowly building a customer list and hopes to someday quit his officey type job and do glasswork full time.

I guess my point is, it's OK (and common) to not like or hate you job. But work towards something, whatever you love, and it makes your less-than-desirable job a little easier until you can manage a permanent change.

:hug: Hope tomorrow is bright and sunny for you.

kristynkayte
02-21-2012, 12:41 PM
I was just in the same situation. I went to school and got my degree in teaching and did that for 4 years. I changed careers to banking and finance and did that for 8 years. I just wasn't happy. I made a total career change in december and took an LNA class locally to see if I would like it and LOVE it! I just got my license a month ago and am currently working a full time LNA job and a part time private care job. I am currently applying to nursing school to continue in the medical field. Best change I ever made. I took a drastic pay cut. Like $6/hour pay cut...but i'm so much happier. I love to be able to go home at night and know that I helped someone that day...and made an impact in someone's day. I leave every night with a smile on my face...even if i'm not always smiling the whole time i am there. Lol.
I'm not saying to join the medical field...just saying that sometimes $ isn't everything. I'm much happier with less $ in my pocket and loving my job. Change is good. Don't be afraid. If you don't take the chance...you may never find the 'ah-ha' moment you are searching for :) Don't regret the choices you make in life...regret the chances you never took :)