A few years ago, when I was losing weight consistently, dieting seemed like the easiest thing in the world. NOTHING tempted me. People marvelled at my willpower. I did my weekly weigh-in and NEVER gained, even over the course of a few years. But it didn't really feel like willpower because I wasn't resisting temptation... I was just so driven by my desire to lose weight that I wasn't tempted at all.
Now, staying on a diet for even a few hours is torture. I feel like I can't go on without food. It's not that my life has become more stressful than it was... I just feel this need to binge that cannot be ignored.
My mom used to call this the "broken switch"-- as if there is a switch in our brain that allows us to be on the diet or off the diet, and some people can flip it on and off whenever they want. But for some of us that switch is broken, and in my case, when I look back on myself in the days when the switch was stuck ON, I can't even recognize myself. I wonder how I did it... even though I know how I did it. It wasn't hard then. But it feels like the hardest thing in the world now.
Maybe it's because I've been at goal weight and, while I loved the attention and adoration that came with it, I realized that it doesn't guarantee happiness the way that I thought it would.
What do you mean , you can't go on without food ? Don't you eat when you are dieting? There is no reason to starve yourself in order to diet and maintain. The store is full of wholesome, nutritious food that you can eat and still lose weight.
I regained a bit... of weight when I was pregnant this last year. I've spent the last three months trying to loose it. I've lost the majority of it, but have about 20 pounds left to go.
It's been a struggle though. It seems like it was easier last time. Like the 100 pounds just melted off. I think that's just perception. I think if you were really able to go back and live that moment again, you'd find that it was hard, it was a struggle, but you're remembering it differently than it actually happened. At least that's what I've found.
I think you just have to find your determination again and not let yourself get off with the excuse of a broken switch. At least that's what I've decided for myself.
Good luck! You can and will do it, broken switch or not!
You need to make your life good NOW and find happiness now or allow yourself to be more content because that promise that everything will be better at the goal weight is a hard promise to keep to yourself.
Nothing about your is broken you, as well all have tendencies, I have found myself being all or nothing, in one mode finding it hard to eat less and then finding it hard to eat enough!
I absolutely understand what you are saying. There are times when our heads are "in it" and times when we just can't get going. I have lost weight in the past and it seemed effortless. Not only did the weight come off fairly easily, but I was not tempted to stray. I'm pretty much in that place now, staying On Plan without effort (although weight loss is not quick). I don't know how I got here, or why the "switch" went on, but I'm glad it did.
So, why are there times when it is effortless and times when it is a herculean task?
I wish I could completely figure it out, but I've never been able to. I do think it's about digging down deep and deciding to move forward with your life in a healthy way, and the food issues subside and you just keep going.
I think a positive mindset is essential, and I don't mean simple optimism, but really feeling good about yourself, your food plan, and your goals; and having confidence that it will work. Those are things that have always been present when I've been successful. That is the place and the mindset that we need to duplicate.
Is there something that triggers our mind and then our behavior? I don't know, but it is important to take the necessary action and make a plan so that you give your switch a chance to turn "on" because if you don't you will never know.
If I'm not in that place, I almost never succeed with any significant loss or change. All the platitudes, logic, common sense and "will power" don't cut it when the switch isn't "on". Even slip-ups are of little concern, because you just move on from them.
It is good to remember that if you did it once, you will be able to do it again. You may have a few false starts, but don't give up, because you will do it, the switch will go on at some point.
We believe in you.
Last edited by Italiannie; 02-09-2012 at 06:45 AM.
It can be so hard to keep motivated, especially at this time of year, please if you have not already try exercise, it can make you feel better! naturalfigures
Totally know where you're coming from. My switch has been broken for a long time. I actually fixed the switch when I moved away from my family to attend university when I was young. Most people gain in college, I managed to lose 30+ pounds in the first 2 years. Then I met my hubby and the weight slowly came back on and my switch was again broken. It takes me a while to reset the switch. When my switch is broken, I am actually unaware of when I am at the satisfied point of eating and always ate until I was physically full.
Now that I'm back on plan, I am filling my belly with water a glass before I eat and a glass while I eat. This has definitely helped me to reset the switch and I am hoping that I won't slowly fade it out like I have in the past.
Way to go with your weight loss! Already more than half way there! That's really great!
My journey is just beginning but I am starting with a good attitude this time around and not being completely restrictive as many popular diets seem to promote. I'm doing what works for me and this may change on a week to week basis, so hopefully I will continue to have positive results...oh, well, negative results hmmm you know what I mean lol
I know EXACTLY what you're talking about - I could have written your post myself. I lost 63 pounds back in 2007-2008 and I didn't struggle much at all (for the most part). There was nothing in the world that could get me to cheat on my diet. Even on Christmas Day, I only indulged a little bit because I was on my elliptical before dinner! Then one day it was like something in my brain just shut off - I completely fell off the wagon and within a few months, had gained back 30 pounds. I found the motivation again eventually and lost 40 pounds, then fell off again.
I wish I knew why it happens and how to fix it. I'm motivated again now (after 4 months of NOT being motivated at all) and I live in fear of it happening again. For myself, I try to look at my old "skinny" clothes, and pictures of myself taken when I was thinner. It helps, but I'm still trying to figure out how to stop this epic months long falling off the wagon thing I do.
I wish I could be of more help But you're not alone, I can tell you that.
I also understand what you mean. I sometimes find weight loss very easy and then there are times when I can't do it no matter what I try....although usually it's somewhere in between. Something that helps to reset my switch is exercise and proper sleep. If I have both of those, then I'm much more likely to feel good and successful.
YES! I'm going through the same problem.. My friends said its because I deprived myself for all these year from having foods that I want and I'm suppose to find balance. Have a small portion of decedent food and fill up on salad etc so I wont binge or fall completely off the wagon and get to the goal weight. SIGH... even that is hard at time lolz
Thanks all for your feedback and encouragement... finally back to respond I've actually been doing much better wrt binges. But it's really nice to hear that others share in this feeling.
oh my god I could have written this. I've had this very same conversation to myself many of times. Somehow, and I don't even know how, I turned the switch on and went from 200 down to 127 in 8-9 months. I maintained a little bit. I'd go up 2-5, but would manage to go back down. Then my switch broke. I went crazy. Thinking of food all the time, never getting enough. It seemed to be worse when I was full than if I was hungry. The fuller I got, the hungrier I got. I gained 20 lbs this last year. I try, I try so hard to get back to the mind set I was at when I lost the weight in the first place, and I can't for the life of me manage to do it - even for just a day. I don't know how I did it. I wish more than anything in the world I could get back there, but I don't know how to get off this wagon and back on to this one.
I could go on and on, but I just wanted to tell you I'm exactly where you are!
Yes. I think that the real secret to forever maintaining your weight is finding out how to continue losing or maintaining even after that switch is long broken. My switch broke 4 years ago. That spark of motivation, which can stretch for a long time, but I can't depend on it always being there. At some point, I just have to find a way to continue my journey with or without that spark.
YES - totally get it! I just posted a thread about this in the Support Forum because I am starting to feel the binge cycle take control of me again. My switch was ON all last year - I went on a two week vacation in May and way over-indulged, gained 8 pounds and was back at the gym the day we got home (jet-lag and all!) - I was bummed I'd gained, but totally resolved to lose.
Now, I pretty much have a 50/50 shot at staying in control every day - I'm still working out a ton, which has kept me maintaining - but I still want to lose that last 20 and I feel like my switch is broken again.
I truly believe it's got nothing to do with willpower and more to do with happiness and contentment. I've recently resolved myself, after years of trying, that I'll never have kids (I'm almost 41) and it has been difficult to deal with. I believe in my heart that this, on top of turning 41 next month, has been pulling me down and I'm reacting with binges.
Maybe there is something buried that is turning your triggers back on in force, too?
The "broken switch"
But you're not alone, I can tell you that.
I've actually been doing much better wrt binges. But it's really nice to hear that others share in this feeling.
