100 lb. Club - Annoying Co worker question




View Full Version : Annoying Co worker question


SmallSteps
02-07-2012, 11:17 PM
I have a co - worker who is always "on a diet" is always "going to exercise tonight" is always "going to the gym" and she never ever follows through. She is a follower if you are doing it she is doing it too and can do it better and faster than you ever can.

She knows I am dieting and she knows I have given up all forms of soda but she is forever offering me food and soda. She always says one drink will not hurt you, one piece of cake will not hurt you, one doughnut will not hurt you (you get the idea)

My questions is how do you deal with the self sabotagers in your life who are not happy unless they are bringing someone down with them?


rakel
02-07-2012, 11:23 PM
Hmmm, tough one. Aside from having a heart to heart, I would continue to decline until she gets tired of asking, and don't offer too much information about what you're doing... Just let your results speak for themselves. :)

carter
02-07-2012, 11:24 PM
"Great, good for you. Best of luck with your plan! So, how is your kid doing?"

"No, thanks - I know the donut won't hurt me, but I just don't want it. Thanks, though. So, have you seen any of the Oscar-nominated movies?"

Repeat as necessary. She will get the message eventually.


Kitcherella
02-08-2012, 03:58 AM
Kindly ignore. I have a friend like that. Whenever I do something, she has done it, she knows better, she's fitter. she's this, she's that. She is an insecure person and she tries to come across as stronger by behaving like that.
Carter has said it really.

oneshortday
02-08-2012, 04:57 AM
Ignore, ignore, ignore. Maybe bring in some healthier food for you both to share if she's so adamant about sharing food. Also, if she's willing to listen, you can maybe try explaining calorie counting and how one soda or one piece of cake DOES matter because you're trying to make a change or portion out your diet for the day.

I also deflect in those situations. For example: "hey, I would, but I just ate. I think (other co-worker) would like it, though!" which, in most cases is true. :)

Beverlyjoy
02-08-2012, 05:20 AM
This is tough. She's trying to 'trip you up' it seems. Keep saying, "No thank you."

Could you say something like this: "It would be so helpful to me if you don't offer me goodies'.

Some people can't stand to see people do what they can't do. Good luck.

cathi888
02-08-2012, 10:26 AM
"It would be so helpful to me if you don't offer me goodies'.

I like this one. I have found most others want to feel involved in your journey, but don't know how, this makes them feel like they are doing something to help you.

linJber
02-08-2012, 10:35 AM
I like all the answers so far. Here's a different one. A bit sarcastic, so you have to decide if it's appropriate. If other people at work also know you're trying to lose, call her out in front of them by saying, "I know you love to share, but I'd rather not right now and I appreciate the fact that everyone else has honored that. It would be a big help if you stopped offering me treats. If I change my mind and want some, I'll ask. Thanks."

That's my immature self coming out. The older and wiser self says its probably not the best response but it will feel good! Just ignore her. She's a small bitter person.

Lin

astrophe
02-08-2012, 10:45 AM
Sometimes I just stretch the truth a bit and say "No thanks. I'm pre-diabetic. It will mess with my blood sugar."

I've never had someone react with anything but "Ohhhh... sorrry. Didn't know!" and they back off.

I'm actually prediabetic PCOS hypothyroid syndrome X but who wants to explain THAT? It's so much easier to go "diabetes" because everyone's heard of that.

A.

sontaikle
02-08-2012, 10:50 AM
If you don't want to stir up any discussions and confrontations, I've found that "I'll have some in a little bit" is a good way to get people off your back. You haven't outright refused the food, and chances are they forget about you not having any.

gagirl1
02-08-2012, 10:54 AM
Ok, I know it's wrong to lie but sometimes you just might need to. Maybe next time you could tell her that you're pre-diabetic and that having those things would be harmful to your health. That might make her take a step back and stop trying to sabotage your healty lifestyle if she thinks it is more than just another diet. Then if she wants to talk about it further just tell her that you prefer not to talk about it. In the end aren't we all "pre-diabetic" and pre-a lot of other things if we don't get our weight under control? We all know her kind! Good luck!

OnMyWayDown
02-08-2012, 10:58 AM
First of all CONGRATULATIONS :bravo:
You have accomplished so much already.

Secondly there are always people who will try and guilt you into failing. It normally is because it justifies there decisions and less about you.

The only advice I can impart is that I have learned to tell people who know I am "changing my lifestyle" that "insert particular offered item here" will not kill me it will simply make me have to work that much harder tomorrow but thank you anyways.

Keep it up we can all do this together. One day at a time :carrot:

time2lose
02-08-2012, 11:09 AM
It seems like every work place has one of those people who feel that they have to push the food! I have said, "I have diabetics in my family and the sugar can hurt me." However, the best defense is just saying, "No thanks". In my experience, if you are consistent with that, the food pusher eventually gives up. But accept once, and they are encouraged to continue!

SmallSteps
02-08-2012, 01:45 PM
All Great and Wonderful Suggestions!!! I really think I pissed her off this morning and I really don't care because I am in that kind of mood!

She came into the office carrying two plates each with a doughnut and a napkin.

Her: "Here I brought you some breakfast"

Me: "Thanks but I have already eaten"

Her: "Oh go ahead and eat it, it will not hurt you to have just one"

Me: Screaming as I am throwing the plate, doughnut and napkin into the trash can "I told you I do NOT want this, I have asked you repeatively to stop!!"

Her: " Now that really was not necessary!"

Me: "Obviously it was you NEVER listen to me!"

I am so over this!! Maybe now she will understand!!

astrophe
02-08-2012, 02:19 PM
Jeez!

I'm sorry that you had to get all dramatic but that person just doesn't LISTEN or what?

I wonder what need she fulfills by being a food pusher?

A.

SmallSteps
02-08-2012, 02:31 PM
Jeez!

I'm sorry that you had to get all dramatic but that person just doesn't LISTEN or what?

I wonder what need she fulfills by being a food pusher?

A.

I am 44 years old and she is 58 I wonder if its a mother thing?

bargoo
02-08-2012, 02:40 PM
Me: Screaming as I am throwing the plate, doughnut and napkin into the trash can "I told you I do NOT want this, I have asked you repeatively to stop!!"

Her: " Now that really was not necessary!"

Me: "Obviously it was you NEVER listen to me!"

I am so over this!! Maybe now she will understand!!

Wow ! I bet that felt good.

astrophe
02-08-2012, 02:44 PM
I am 44 years old and she is 58 I wonder if its a mother thing?

Maybe. Who knows? I do know that some people equate you eating / liking their food as liking them.

Or like a bonding ritual -- to have an eating buddy?

A.

linJber
02-08-2012, 03:00 PM
It sounds like she just likes to meddle. And undermine. If the situation comes up that allows you to apologize, try making an analogy to taking medicine. "I know you don't want me to feel deprived. But you'd never suggest that skipping a dose of medicine just once wouldn't hurt. I feel the same about this."

Lin

SmallSteps
02-08-2012, 03:05 PM
Yes Bargoo actually it DID!!

Astrophe: I don't mind being the eating buddy but she needs to get on some low calories food and stop pushing the bakery!

SmallSteps
02-08-2012, 03:12 PM
We will see what happens Lin. 3 of us work in this cramp tiny room all day together so eventually I will have to speak to her again! LOL!

staja
02-08-2012, 03:25 PM
SmallSteps: I'm more of a lurker than anything else, but I wanted to pop out of the shadows, because you're reaction to your co-worker made me smile today :)

evilwomaniamshe
02-08-2012, 03:25 PM
What I say to the food pushers is this... "Thanks, but NO thank you I am allergic to ________ (whatever it is), it makes my @ss swell!" :)
Yup, honesty is the best policy..:D

angelsgirl1983
02-08-2012, 03:31 PM
Congratulations!

SmallSteps
02-08-2012, 03:46 PM
SmallSteps: I'm more of a lurker than anything else, but I wanted to pop out of the shadows, because you're reaction to your co-worker made me smile today :)


Thanks staja! This is what happens when you catch me on a pre menstrual day! lol

konfyoozed
02-08-2012, 04:09 PM
What I say to the food pushers is this... "Thanks, but NO thank you I am allergic to ________ (whatever it is), it makes my @ss swell!" :)
Yup, honesty is the best policy..:D

this almost made me spit my water out. lol... i like it.

Candeka
02-08-2012, 04:53 PM
Does she have children? Are they overweight? I know a lot of mothers who are food pushers to their coworkers. It helps them feel like they are helping and doing something good and nice. Most of the them have overweight children since I think food pushing makes them feel like they are showing love and affection.

SmallSteps
02-08-2012, 05:46 PM
Her children are grown and do not live with her. She lives all alone doesn't even have a pet that I know of. She is just a mean evil woman.

linJber
02-08-2012, 05:49 PM
SmallSteps - I hope it all works out. Life is too short to be in situations that are uncomfortable or that make us unhappy. I like the I'm "allergic" comment better than the diabetic one. I'm not sure it's a good idea to "fib" about a medical condition at the workplace. You never know where that info might end up. The allergic comment is obviously a joke.

Lin

sontaikle
02-08-2012, 05:51 PM
wow! Kudos to you for standing up to her! Maybe she'll get the message! :cheer: