100 lb. Club - The tickers here depress me sometimes.




Vex
02-07-2012, 09:44 AM
I really like reading these boards, and I know it's dumb, but sometimes I see people's tickers high weight starting at like 160 or 180 and it depresses me.

I read about how they talk about how super fat they and it just makes me think, "why the heck didn't I start THEN instead of now." or holy cow, if they are saying they're huge at 170 I must be freaking enormous. I can't even imagine getting to where they are now.

I know it's silly, but it still makes me feel blah sometimes, and I'm sure people well over my weight probably think the same thing about me.

Maybe it's just because it's snowy, cold, and cloudy outside today that put me in this mindset - but does anyone else ever think that?


.


synger
02-07-2012, 09:48 AM
I definitely agree sometimes. That's one of the reasons I keep coming back to the 100 lb club. You guys KNOW what this is like. By the time we are the weight we are, our metabolisms are broken, perhaps for good. Someone who is "only" 30-50 pounds overweight (though of course it seems like a huge issue for them) don't have some of the same issues and struggles that we do. Granted, some of it is very similar, and I have learned a LOT from folks who have less to lose than I do. But I still come back here, because there are just some things that I won't discuss or vent about in other forums.

thistoo
02-07-2012, 09:50 AM
I have those thoughts sometimes when I read someone who's 160 talking about how 'huge' and 'disgusting' they are. My knee-jerk reaction is always, "Wow, what must they think of me?" But then I remind myself that they're not thinking of me at all, that it's all relative, and they have a right to feel just as bad about themselves as they want (even if they are nearly at my goal weight.)

Sometimes it works. Other times, not so much. ;) The tl;dr version of all that is: I hear you! And I'm doing this for the second time, so it's even *more* depressing this time around.


astrophe
02-07-2012, 10:00 AM
I do wish I'd started sooner.

But I don't internalize other people's body rants. I don't think taking that on board would help me any. So "what must they think of me?" isn't something I think about. I really don't think they are thinking about me -- they are caught up in a rant.

I do sometimes think "How old are you?" because in some of the rants they strike me as younger than me. But then there are those here older than me too. It's going to be a mixed bag. Weight loss is so personal.

A

fyreflie24
02-07-2012, 10:18 AM
My weight gain this time came in two very distinct phases of about 50 lbs each. I was just a bit heavier than I am now at the end of phase 1 and it's odd because I feel much thinner now but then I felt like I was all kinds of a slovenly slug. I am working out more so I think I might be smaller than I was at this weight before and I, too, think 'wow, if I'd started from here I'd be done now!". There's a girl right now on the Biggest Loser who used to be a competitive weight lifter and it's killing her that she can't do what she used to do. Bob told her, 'you are this girl, right now' and he's right! I try to look at the ways this journey MORE than my previous and smaller journeys is making me a stronger, more 'together' person and becoming an integral part of who I am. It's hard to look at the bright side sometimes and I get as freaked and overwhelmed as everyone else, and that's why, like others have said, I come here to vent around people who get it! :) <3

Vex
02-07-2012, 10:22 AM
That's true about being the person you are right now. I was just having a depressed moment I guess. I feel better now though. More caffeine and reading you guys helped :)

.

rachaelm
02-07-2012, 10:24 AM
Yes. They do depress me sometimes. But then I slap myself (mentally, of course) and remember that this is MY journey, not anyone else's. And then I lurk around in the featherweight threads, just to remind myself that 'skinny' people have to work really hard to keep the weight off too.

And I post in the 300+ thread a lot. Cuz they feel my pain.

Ruthxxx
02-07-2012, 10:30 AM
If they really bug you, change your profile. Go to User CP and select Profile Options. There is an area there where you can turn off seeing the tickers. Remember to save your changes.

Eliana
02-07-2012, 10:31 AM
I must say, I AM now one of those 160+ pounds and what a glorious thing to be here!! :D I do not take this weight for granted, no sir-ee.

It bothers me enormously too and always has. I hate very much to see women so disgusted with their bodies. Perhaps that notion should bleed over to all of our weights, but it makes me all the more upset when I see someone I feel is small talk about how huge they are.

I am very grateful to have been where I have because it just makes where I am now that much sweeter. I'm not at goal. :no: I've gained 20 pounds. But I'm still very happy to be where I am.

thistoo
02-07-2012, 10:38 AM
I am very grateful to have been where I have because it just makes where I am now that much sweeter. I'm not at goal. :no: I've gained 20 pounds. But I'm still very happy to be where I am.

When I got down to 150 and felt FANTASTIC this was exactly my attitude. It was nice to have come from where I'd been, knowing what it's like, and to know how hard I'd worked to get to where I was.

I'm frustrated by a substantial regain, sure, but now that I know exactly what I'm working toward, it makes me that much more determined to get there.

linJber
02-07-2012, 12:03 PM
I understand how you feel, though I try not to take it too personally. As some others have said, this is the exact reason I mostly stay in this area of the forum. I even feel funny going to some other areas because I'm not experiencing what they are.

An example is the younger people threads. They have a completely different set of concerns that someone who is my age (60.). I'm not worried about a bikini body, for example. And I want to shout at them that their health is the most important part of this, not some cute boots! LOL at myself! Those are very important reasons! Just not to a 60 something woman who wishes she had done this sooner.

I feel out of place in the heavier forum, too. I think I don't relate very well to someone with more to lose than I do. I know there is wisdom to share no matter our weight. And support is always welcome. But does someone who has 200 pounds to lose look at someone with 100 to lose as a lightweight?"

Perhaps the dividing line is "obese." Anyone heavier than that has a lot in common with all others in the same boat.

I disagree with using the word "disgusting" to describe ourselves, no matter our weight When my DD was small, she had a friend who was a terribly picky eater. That friend referred to anything she didn't like as "disgusting." It upset my DD that someone would call a banana or some other food she liked by that term. The same applies here, perhaps. We are not disgusting at any weight. And if we're in here, it means we're trying to improve. That's what really matters.

Lin

runningfromfat
02-07-2012, 12:08 PM
I must say, I AM now one of those 160+ pounds and what a glorious thing to be here!! :D I do not take this weight for granted, no sir-ee.

This!!! I am so thrilled to be at the low end of the 160's. :D I put on a size 4 pants for the first time in my LIFE this week and am completely over the moon about it! :lol:

Yes, there are things I still want to improve: I'm not at a healthy weight yet, for example, but I feel like I'm close and I love it. It's just so nice to know there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

As to the OP, I hear you! it wasn't that long ago that I made a similar post to yours. I don't like hearing women going through extreme body hate. Don't get me wrong. I definitely believe that body image issues can and DO exists for all shapes and sizes but at some point it's important to learn to love yourself, love your body, and accept who your are. What I HATE is that the media doesn't embrace that and instead they continue to airbrush models and choose models that only fit one body type. I want to see more diversity in modeling so we see first that there are women that look like US (and by real women I mean non-airbrushed women!).

OnMyWayDown
02-07-2012, 12:17 PM
I cant say that I get sad by seeing them I do however feel like I might not have much in common with them on my weight loss journey. My secretary and friend is a size 00 and her goal this year is to gain 10lbs. So supporting each other I am working on helping her gain while she is helping me lose. I must say it is interesting to realize that while I have lost 22lbs she has not gained an ounce. I imagine for those who only have a little to go it is just as hard if not harder for them to get there. They say the last 10lbs or so hang on really tight.

That said imagine what your ticker is gonna say at the end. :carrot:

dragonwoman64
02-07-2012, 01:10 PM
I definitely agree sometimes. That's one of the reasons I keep coming back to the 100 lb club. You guys KNOW what this is like. By the time we are the weight we are, our metabolisms are broken, perhaps for good. Someone who is "only" 30-50 pounds overweight (though of course it seems like a huge issue for them) don't have some of the same issues and struggles that we do. Granted, some of it is very similar, and I have learned a LOT from folks who have less to lose than I do. But I still come back here, because there are just some things that I won't discuss or vent about in other forums.

that's how I pretty much feel.

rakel
02-07-2012, 01:55 PM
It all depends on perspective. Plus, there is a lot of self loathing involved, which really has nothing to do with you, it's just how they feel about themselves. When I was 170lbs I thought I was disgusting too, and now I am almost twice that! But just because they have less to lose doesn't mean it's still not really hard. From what I know, it's actually easy to lose a lot of weight in a short amount of time if you have a lot to lose, whereas if you only have a small amount it takes longer and is harder to get rid of. Thats not to say that it's not hard to lose weight if you're larger like me - because no matter what it's difficult to change habits, change your heart/mind, etc. For the purpose of my demonstration, the "ease" is just physical... But if you don't address the mental, the physical won't happen, or it does and you end up gaining it back and sometimes more.

Eliana
02-07-2012, 02:27 PM
It all depends on perspective. Plus, there is a lot of self loathing involved, which really has nothing to do with you, it's just how they feel about themselves. When I was 170lbs I thought I was disgusting too, and now I am almost twice that! But just because they have less to lose doesn't mean it's still not really hard. From what I know, it's actually easy to lose a lot of weight in a short amount of time if you have a lot to lose, whereas if you only have a small amount it takes longer and is harder to get rid of. Thats not to say that it's not hard to lose weight if you're larger like me - because no matter what it's difficult to change habits, change your heart/mind, etc. For the purpose of my demonstration, the "ease" is just physical... But if you don't address the mental, the physical won't happen, or it does and you end up gaining it back and sometimes more.
This is absolutely true. I thought it was hard to lose weight at 235, but it was a different hard than I experience now. Now my calories have to be spot on, and the quality of the calories matter (I'm convinced) and I have to not just exercise, but exercise with goals and intensity in mind. Before it was hard because I was battling cravings, any exercise was hard and intense and I had so much self-doubt. But I think the hardest thing for me was that I worked so incredibly hard and looked in the mirror and still hated what I saw. Now I can work really hard, lose nothing...but I least I like what I see in the mirror. I attribute that once again to having been where I have. If I hadn't gotten up so high, I would NOT currently like what I see. So when the scale doesn't move, at least I can say, "Well, at least I maintained this."

SmallSteps
02-07-2012, 03:13 PM
No matter what your starting weight I believe all people think they are huge, enormous, big as the side of the barn. We are depressed and there is a lot of self loathing involved.

When I weighed 150 I thought I was as big as an elephant and now I would do anything to be that weight again.

So don't take it personal we are all here fighting the same battle and supporting each other along the way.

goal4agirl
02-07-2012, 11:14 PM
My goodness you have lost a bunch of weight in a few shorts months (looking at you ticker Vex)
You are doing an amazing job! I would not worry one little bit about what others say about feeling huge at 150-170 Lbs.
The main thing is not to compare ourselves with each other, it will always lead to sadness and bad feelings. You just keep your eye on the prize and keep on going strong.
;)

oneshortday
02-07-2012, 11:38 PM
I tend to feel similarly more on a in-person basis. I know people who weigh anywhere from 130-180 who constantly talk about how fat they are. It drives me nuts, especially when I'm sitting right next to them! I know they don't mean it personally, but it's hard to see it that way when you're on the heavier side of the scale. I think a little tact would be nice, but it is what it is.

On here, however, I think it's a little different. As discouraging as it may be to see someone's highest weight as 160, let's remember that we're losing TOGETHER. It's about being healthy and happy with who we are, no matter which side of the scale we're on! :)

ValRock
02-07-2012, 11:43 PM
I was born fat... I feel like I have more to be proud of.

You'll be there too one day and look back and be so proud of yourself!!!!

duckyyellowfeet
02-08-2012, 01:18 AM
It does bother me, but I try to put it into perspective.

We all have something we wish we "had". I wish I hadn't regained 60lbs and had re-entered my journey after 5, 10, 15lbs. Other people wish they had started earlier in their lives. Other people wish they lost the same amount of weight that another member did.

I try to find the positive in the things I HAVE done right. There is always something "better" but there is also the best with the situation I have. That is what I keep forcing myself to look at....cause otherwise I go crazy.

Nightkatt
02-08-2012, 02:51 AM
I think for me its not the starting weight .. but how low the goal is lol .. I feel bad for not aiming that low .. I dont know what I want to get down to, I just want to feel better and be happy in my skin .. hence only choosing 25lb at a time til I reach where Im happy. But then I look at the tickers with 1?? and Im thinking should I be aiming lower????? I think it has to be something you are confident in .. I remember when I was younger I got down to what was almost my ideal for my height and I felt like a walking coat hanger with my bones sticking out .. its in interesting journey with a lot of self discovery.

rakel
02-08-2012, 09:00 AM
I think for me its not the starting weight .. but how low the goal is lol .. I feel bad for not aiming that low .. I dont know what I want to get down to, I just want to feel better and be happy in my skin .. hence only choosing 25lb at a time til I reach where Im happy. But then I look at the tickers with 1?? and Im thinking should I be aiming lower????? I think it has to be something you are confident in .. I remember when I was younger I got down to what was almost my ideal for my height and I felt like a walking coat hanger with my bones sticking out .. its in interesting journey with a lot of self discovery.

I know what you mean. I do have an ultimate goal of under 200 (don't much care how much under, we'll see when I get there), but for now I am focusing on losing 50lbs. Seeing a ticker with 160lbs to lose was freaking me out so I will just take it in smaller goals instead of focusing on the enormity of what I really should be losing.

runningfromfat
02-08-2012, 09:16 AM
I think for me its not the starting weight .. but how low the goal is lol .. I feel bad for not aiming that low .. I dont know what I want to get down to, I just want to feel better and be happy in my skin .. hence only choosing 25lb at a time til I reach where Im happy. But then I look at the tickers with 1?? and Im thinking should I be aiming lower????? I think it has to be something you are confident in .. I remember when I was younger I got down to what was almost my ideal for my height and I felt like a walking coat hanger with my bones sticking out .. its in interesting journey with a lot of self discovery.

Looking at your ticker it seems what you're doing is working amazingly well for you, congrats! ;)

I was the same. When I started the thought of losing 100lbs was very overwhelming so I've always put my mini-goals in my signature. For a long time I would just look at the top one on my list and focus 100% of my energy on that. When I started it was pretty incomprehensible for me to think of low numbers or imagine what it would even be like too. I've had a goal range in mind for awhile but really my mini-goals were always my main goal for that period of time (still is for that matter!).

OnMyWayDown
02-08-2012, 10:24 AM
But if you don't address the mental, the physical won't happen, or it does and you end up gaining it back and sometimes more.

A very intuitive insight. I hope this time I can address the mental part and keep it off.

Nightkatt
02-10-2012, 12:00 AM
I cant remember who had it on their signature but a fave quote I read when I was last on here was:

I cant lose 100 pounds, but I CAN lose 10 pounds 10 times :) Makes it more realistic :)

saltatoria
02-10-2012, 12:42 AM
Sometimes I feel jealous that they're starting at a weight close to my *goal* weight, but then I remember everyone has their own struggle and it doesn't make it any easier for them.

I was sort of venting to my boyfriend that I'm so tired of hearing about girls at work who need to lose 5-10 pounds, like it's the hardest thing ever. I told him I wish I only needed to lose 5-10 pounds. He said, "Well, think of it as losing 5-10 pounds, and then lose 5-10 more, and so on." I get what he was saying, and it's nice to think of it that way, but I still get a little jealous. ;)

suzukigurl
02-10-2012, 12:19 PM
I totally get it but the way I look at it from a few points of view.
#1: EVERYONE is harder on themselves and most of the time it's a state of mind or an emotional statement not a statement of fact. I think back to when I was HUGE or ENORMOUSLY overweight at 225 lbs where as now I would LOVE to be back there.
#2: My best friend (who I might add I think is gorgeous... LOL) is struggling with her weight right now. She is 155Lbs, Yes I said 155lbs but this is the heaviest she has been in 15 years. Just a year ago she was 125lbs & the weight she gained is a HUGE amount to her.No matter what your size or weight when your FAT pants are to tight you get the same sick feeling in your gut! Now here I am her BFF at 285lbs(as of about a month ago) and she is not disgusted by my size or would say I am monstrously over weight!
#3: Everyone is at a different place in their weight loss journey. The journey is very personal and often can be a struggle no matter if it's 10lbs or 200lbs.
We all need to work hard to get to our goals. It might take someone who is 150 lbs a month to lose 5lbs where as I may be able to lose that in a week!

Again I know the feeling and have had those same thoughts from time to time, but this time around I am focused on my journey on only SUPPORT other on theirs I will never COMPARE again!!!