General chatter - little overwhelmed...looks like we will

01-29-2012, 08:43 AM
be raising our two youngest grandboys..we filed for guardianship so we could take care of medical. Mom has become a stripper and embraced the party lifestyle has told me that she would like to see them just once a week. Dad, our son, sees living with us as a free ride to go out on the weekends and to tell you the truth its much more peacefull when he does ...neither is helping financially at this point. All the reasons why our son was asked to leave at 18 are coming back...

At 46 and 52 and both working full will definitely be an adjustment...a 9 month old and 20 month old...the lack of sleep is the hardest thing..

anyone in a similar situation...anyone know of any support sites like this one??

01-29-2012, 08:55 AM
Haven't been there, but God bless you for being there for your grandsons, for giving them a stable life.

01-29-2012, 10:39 AM
the lack of sleep will be the worst..

01-29-2012, 10:40 AM
Holy moly. My DH is 52, and I am 44. Our DS is 12. What Bargoo said ... You are taking on something incredible, and giving those little boys a chance at a good life. Maybe in time their parents will grow up too. Wow. Just .... wow.

Lifehack has some good ideas for simplifying, but seems like you need some real support, not just Internet forums. Are there any real social service resources in your area that you can tap into?

01-29-2012, 10:57 AM
Sorry to hear about the parents not being responsible, that is a bummer. It's great you all care enough to take in the baby.

I don't know what to tell you about your son. I'm not anywhere in that situation, but I know if I were you I'd be mad as ****. My only advice, is to be tough on him and make him pay his bills or do chores around the house at least if he is not going to take care of his baby.

01-29-2012, 11:03 AM
Hang in there! My grandparents raised my sisters and I.. I thank god every day for them.. they truly made me want to be a better person.. you are their guardian angels. :-)

01-29-2012, 11:04 AM
Kudos to you for taking on this responsibility for the sake of the kids. It's terrible the parents are being so flaky.

I think in those shoes I'd talk to social workers, lawyers, etc who are helping you with the guardianships. I'm sure they see that sort of paperwork / situation all the time and perhaps can point you to online support systems or real life support systems.

For instance I did a seach for "Grandparents raising grandchildren" and came up with links like

I'd have to sit back an assess how much/little to let the bio parents around the kids. If total flakes, the kids don't need to be around that.

Hang in there. It's a lot of hard decisions but I'm sure you will do your best by your grandkids. Remember you don't have to be everything for everybody, put your OWN oxygen mask on first. Even if it means asking son to move out so YOUR home life is more stable for the babies.