40-Somethings - Remembering that "thin" is not problem-free
01-14-2012, 10:49 PM
Just a quick throw out thought. I am not thin, but got my first, "You are half the size you used to be!" comment today. (I am in no way half the size I used to be). People are treating me differently.
It's really weird to be slowly sliding back into the world I was in when I used to be thin. I remember now that I was often unhappy when I was thin. In fact, part of the reason I gained weight was to "costume" myself, in a way. To protect myself from unwanted (or wanted) attention.
What are some coping techniques you all use to deal with the unwanted emotional side effects of losing weight and being more appealing/noticeable to others?
Thighs Be Gone
01-14-2012, 11:28 PM
Gosh, that's a hard one. It was difficult. People did start treating me differently--some better, some not. I went through a period where I felt really uncomfortable even in my own skin--and clothing for that matter. It will take a while. What ever you do, don't let it distract you from your goal. Keep going, and this too shall pass. Hugs coming your way.
01-14-2012, 11:35 PM
Thank you so much for responding and understanding. I didn't realize that losing weight would be such an emotional journey. It seems so simple - lose weight - be happy. It's not so simple. I am remembering that I did not like the thin me very much - even though I enjoyed how she looked and dressing her up. I did not like the thin me as a person. Fat me is much nicer, less judgemental, and just a more moral and down-to-earth person. I don't want to lose that - even though I do want to lose the fat.
Thanks for reminding me not to give up on my weight loss goals. I am determined to keep going forward! I need to if I want to keep living a healthy life. There is no choice.
01-16-2012, 11:02 AM
You just have to stay grounded. Thin or fat, be who you want to be. You have to realize you're going to get attention and you'll have to figure out how to deal with it. It's not always going to be good either. But you are doing this for YOU and it shouldn't matter at all what everyone else thinks.
They say having a ton of money has its problems as well, but I wouldn't know. I'd like to give those problems a try. ;)
01-16-2012, 08:26 PM
I was reading about happiness and people who won the lottery, and apparently there is a study which says that these people report they were much happier for a year after they got their money, but that after a year they found themselves feeling much like they felt before. That tells me that once we get what we want, we need to set new goals and strive after them. With a healthy body, let's go for more!!!
01-16-2012, 08:58 PM
Well personally I'll be glad when people stop looking through me or past me like I don't exist- sometimes it feels like being heavy makes me a pariah. But I do think that being heavier or having other issues can often make us more empathetic. I don't think you'll lose that when you're skinny. You'll remember.
01-16-2012, 09:27 PM
Thanks for the comments. I have often said that the bigger I get, the less people see me. It's a strange paradox how we become invisible when we become overweight. I feel like a ghost who suddenly finds herself being seen by the living world! It isn't happening all at once, but it is happening, and it is startling to find that certain people are noticing me (right now it's mainly people who have struggled in the past with their own weight - so maybe it's that they recognize "one of their own.").
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