Weight Loss Support - I can't believe what I did




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Enriquesgirl2
01-12-2012, 11:28 AM
Hi I am a newbie, My name is Diana. I have started getting chubby during puberty. I remember when I was 12 my weight went up to 138 Lbs I am a touch over 5 feet tall My mother took my to the doctor and he put me on a 1,000 calorie a day diet. I remember my mother counted the calories and posted it on side of refrigerator. I hated it. I lost 30 lbs and I weighed 108 lbs. Through my 20 and 30s I never got over 115 lbs. When I hit 40 I started to well get fat. By the summer of 2008 I was up to 150 lbs. I had a big event coming up in September I went on a strict diet and vigorous and I lost 39 lbs, I weighed 111 pounds for the event. People were commenting that was was too thin. I felt great about myself It did not last long. I am now bigger then I have ever been in my life. I am afraid to get on the scale. I was wearing junior clothes not I can not even find Misses ****s to fit me. I am wearing men's tee shirts.. How could have done that to myself. I had to go out and buy new clothes because even the few fat clothes I kept did not fit . I must have gained at least 50 lbs I am back on a 300 calorie diet I can not walk because I sprained my ankle. I gain back more then I lost I could I do that to myself. My problem is when I am eating I am not thinking especially when it comes beer. I am so angry and disgusted with my self. When I lost that weight back in 2008 I said to myself I will never get fat again but I did it. I had to get that off my chest, I bore other people when I talk about I hope I did not bore you


sacha
01-12-2012, 11:52 AM
Sorry, 300 calories?? Is that a typo?

You've been binging & starving for most of your life, are you ready to decide to love yourself and learn to have a GOOD relationship with food? If so, people here can help. Food is not the enemy. Self-hatred and using food to perpetuate self-hatred is the enemy, IMO.

Salley
01-12-2012, 12:18 PM
Guilt is another sworn enemy. Forgiving yourself is an important step. Congratulations for taking the action to join 3FatChicks! You're not alone!


bargoo
01-12-2012, 12:18 PM
300 calories ! Stop it right now ! You are starving yourself. You cannot be getting nearly enough nutrition with only 300 calories a day. You have not bored me, alarmed me would be more like it. You need to be on a healthy diet. Any diet that you will follow. I am just 5 feet tall and I lost on 1400 calories a day. I counted calories but do what you can do, but be sure it is healthy.

ShanIAm
01-12-2012, 12:19 PM
I'm like you sacha -- I really hope that 300 calories was a typo. Even if it was 300 calories A MEAL I'd be concerned. And the weight will definitely come back on with vengence if you are not taking it off a healthy way. I know some people who must drop pounds fast in order to be at a healthy weight for much needed surgery but never should it be done otherwise.

I can tell through your words that you are desperate to get this weight off and KEEP IT OFF. So the first thing you need to do is find a weight loss plan that is sustainable long term and it is a plan that can be easily tweaked for when you are ready to maintain.

I think your doctor did you a huge disservice by restricting your calories to only 1000 at that age. Even any age for that matter. And your mom was just following his orders. But you are now in the mindset that the lower the calories the bigger the reward. Short term, yes. Long term, no. So you need to shift gears mentally and remember that it is all about the long term. Otherwise you'll be yo-yo'ing and struggling with your weight for the rest of your life.

You found a great site here and I strongly recommend you do a lot of reading and posting and venting. You'll find the help and support you need.

Good luck sweetie! Hugs to you.

JayEll
01-12-2012, 12:22 PM
Diana, I would suggest that you get an appointment to see a Registered Dietitian. These are professionals who are knowledgeable about nutrition and weight. They can evaluate your situation and help you with a plan that you can sustain. It may take longer than what you would like to lose, but if you stay with it, it will work better than crash dieting followed by regaining. See if you need a doctor referral, but in any case, spend a little money and get some help, rather than spending it on beer... ;)

Jay

Enriquesgirl2
01-12-2012, 12:33 PM
Yes 300 calories a day less now that I can not exercise the way I want to. I have been doing this for a week and the pants are still tight when I sit. I really wanted to use the name 2fat2live because the is how I feel. but I thought that was too depressing I know I need help.. I want to this weight off me immediately. The less I eat the easier it is for me to stick to it. I can not eat five saltines with my soup I will end up eating the whole sleeve Better not to eat any. That is how I gained all this wait back. One dish of icecream became two and then three. Four slices of bacon became 10 . One beer becomes three then six I do feel helpless I can't even watch those weight loss commerical I want so much for that to me it hurt too much to watch Right now I fatter and more depressed then I ever had in my life. I want this weight off me Thank you for your support

sacha
01-12-2012, 12:39 PM
I'm sorry to hear that wasn't a typo. That is starvation (literally). It sounds like you have an eating disorder along with depression and need some professional counseling as well. Good luck to you.

bargoo
01-12-2012, 12:41 PM
It doesn't come off immediately. It takes one meal at a time, one bite at a time. You can lose weight on sustantially more caloreis than 300 a day. Does your doctor know that is what you are doing ? This is not helping you it is hurting you and will make it more difficult in the long run. I agree with JayEll that you need help not only a nutritionist but a counselor perhaps.

Rapunzel
01-12-2012, 01:27 PM
300 calories isn't suitable for anyone, and definitely not you whether you're exercisings or not. Have you been to a nutritionist? You should look into it. They'll work out your calories and foods for you in a healthy way and you don't have to feel guilty about it all.
Why the 1000 calorie diet when you were only 138? That's not fat! I'm "a touch over 5 feet" too at 5'1" and 135 is my GOAL weight for pete's sake! Anything lower is a bonus to me, but 135 is not perfect but it's not fat or terribly unhealthy. What a terribly thing to do to a growing child. My mom is my height too and she's always been around 100-105 pounds and she is wayyyyy too skinny.
You should try a nutritionist if not anything else the other people on here have suggested. Good luck.

Salley
01-12-2012, 02:15 PM
I know the tremendous effort it can take to make the first steps in "getting help". It gets *so* much easier. Please take the advice everyone here is giving you. Check with your doctor, and ask about getting counseling. And keep exploring this site for support. :hug:

srmb60
01-12-2012, 02:24 PM
I was in WalMart the other day and saw a w/o DVD for exercises done on a chair. I already had a couple in my hand so I didn't buy it but that would be kinda fun.

And you won't bore us ... this is what we are here for!

Foxevil
01-12-2012, 02:28 PM
Sounds like things are very tough for you right now and you need to get yourself some help rather than starving yourself, and 300kcal a day is starvation. The way you talk about what has happened makes me think that you have some really severe issues with food and body image and I think a good step would be to go and see your GP.

I spent a good deal of my life binging and purging, and in my 20s I was diagnosed with Bulimia. I relate to a lot of what you have said but life can be better than it is right now. I went on anti-depressants and saw a counsellor and a dietician all of those helped me get to a place where I wasn't consumed by my weight and food any more and yes I am still fat and I still need to lose weight but I don't hate myself. Somedays I can even joke about being a fatty!

I really feel for you, please go and talk to someone who can help you with the way you are feeling.

free1
01-12-2012, 02:34 PM
Did I read that 300 calories LESS....than I presume what you r currently eating? If so, how many calories r u currently eating. If not, STOP this is dangerous in every way you can imagine.

Enriquesgirl2
01-12-2012, 06:23 PM
Today I had soup and a salad. I have weights so I have been stretching in a chair. I went to the orthopedic doctor and in addition to a ankle sprain I have tendonitis I have to go to physical therapy but I still can do my power walking. I have seen 300 calorie diets on line. Have any of you ever heard of the Rotation diet? My friend lost weight with it but she goes to Weight watches now. The doctor was concerned about my weight because I asthma. This worried my mother. That was over 30 years ago but thinking about it. I think it may have been a factor in me developing this problem. When I was in my teens I go got down to 88 pounds. Now my mother was worried about me being too thin. I went to the hospital and therapy and . I gained wait which was torture for me even though I was so extremely thin. I was able to straighten myself out and I never got over 115 pounds. A few years ago after I passed 40 I started gaining weight, I was appalled and with the before mentioned 300 calorie diet exercise 2 hours a day and power walking six miles a day I lost almost 40 pounds But I was not able to keep the weight off for six months. i was not even eating that much. I am in a worse spot now then I was back then. Plus I am a few years older. I can't believe I spilled my guts on such personal stuff. I hope you don't think I am a nutcase. I lost a friend a couple of years about because she I was an anorexic nut job and she could not deal with it.

Arctic Mama
01-12-2012, 06:43 PM
You can and will do serious damage to your body by cycling between starvation and binging, please stop it now. Eat 1400 or so calories a day of whole, healthy foods and ditch the sugar and starchy, bready junk. You'll feel so much better and the physical side of your cravings should come under control, as well.

I am not completely opposed to medically supervised, specific VLCD's, not all function the same way, but this sounds like unhealthy nonsense and I'm afraid you're only going to exacerbate your binge/restriction cycles by starving yourself until your body finally overrides your mind and desperately seeks nutrition.

There are so many sensible diets out there, but your plan (from what I am hearing) isn't one of them. You may not define yourself as anorexic or a nutcase, I think that is oversimplifying it, but your behaviors are not anywhere near healthy mentally or physically and any doctor who would put someone on 300 calories a day, especially without very specific monitoring and supplementation, deserves a lawsuit. We're about maintainable, sensible plans here and would love to help you figure one out if you don't know where to begin, as fellow dieters wo have struggled with many of the sme things you have. But persisting on such a plan as you're on now is incredible dangerous.

Enriquesgirl2
01-12-2012, 07:25 PM
I will try to build my calorie intake up buy gradually. A little more each day. I think I want to hold at 900 because of the lack of exercise I have now with my ankle injury. I can keep such a low calorie count because I don't eat all day just coffee and then I have a late dinner. I know that is not good but I am so used to it it is hard to change Even when I was not on a diet, I would save and store up calories to be used letter I figured I could eat more if I had more caloreis to spare

cherrypie
01-12-2012, 07:31 PM
has it occured to you that the reason you are binging is because you are starving yourself? maybe if you ate reasonably your body and your mind wouldn't be so starved it will snap and eat anything.

Mamalicious
01-12-2012, 07:36 PM
I really feel for you. It seems like you have issues that go deeper than just needing to lose weight. Depression definitely needs to be addressed. Exercising 2 hours a day and power walking 6 miles burns off a whole lot more than the 300 calories you take in. Please try taking in more calories, you are starving yourself. Good luck to you either way.

Enriquesgirl2
01-12-2012, 07:44 PM
When I am in diet mode I am fine. I don't really get hungry if I do I drink coffee After I eat my meal and I am fine the rest of the night All I want to do if fit comfortably into my clothes. I can not keep a bra on. It is the first thing that comes off when I get home, It cuts into my skin. I just had to order a size 40 DDD. 38 DD could not handle it . I just want be able to fit an extra Large size to be able to sit down without my pants digging into me. To stop the roll of fat on my waist from getting numb when I lay my side. If I could just lose 20 lbs I can go slowly with the rest. But being this fat is intolerable for me. I can't help that I feel this way. I am sorry to be a pain

Mamalicious
01-12-2012, 07:57 PM
You are not a pain, you are reaching out for help. How tall are you?

Enriquesgirl2
01-12-2012, 08:28 PM
I am just a little over 5'0

bargoo
01-12-2012, 08:35 PM
And how much do you weigh ?

TiffNeedsChange
01-12-2012, 09:02 PM
I will try to build my calorie intake up buy gradually. A little more each day. I think I want to hold at 900 because of the lack of exercise I have now with my ankle injury. I can keep such a low calorie count because I don't eat all day just coffee and then I have a late dinner. I know that is not good but I am so used to it it is hard to change Even when I was not on a diet, I would save and store up calories to be used letter I figured I could eat more if I had more caloreis to spare

HI!! So AI should start by saying that I too have sprained ankles and tendinitis.. Be careful with all walking, I would get a brace. I have been swimming and riding the stationary bike while injured. I think the best way for you to figure what your calorie intake is would be to hop on a scale (don't stress over the numbers, you know you need to lose and a number will help) then go online and use a Basal Metabolic Rate calculator that will tell you the amount of calories your body needs for basic function, then multiply that by 1.2 which which tell you how many extra calories you use on top of your Bmr if you're mostly sedentary. 300 calories per day is way too low-I am 5'8" 264 pounds eating 1500 calories per day and I have lost 10 pounds in two weeks. The most important thing is taking a vitamin while counting calories unless you're eating very nutrient dense foods like leafy greens and fruit. I have always been a binge eater, well for the last eight or so years and I can tell you the best way to avoid singeing is by allowing yourself an occasional treat but mostly eating what you like in controlled portions. I think counseling would hello too, remember our self worth is not determined by our looks but by our actions-treat yourself kindly.

Enriquesgirl2
01-12-2012, 09:42 PM
I don't know how much I weigh I am too scared, I have not been on the scale for almost two years. I don't even know if the battery is still good, I must be a good 160. I never wore such big sizes and the heaviest I have ever been in my life is 150. My boobs are like two huge 50 pound sacs of potatoes. When I sit down my lower stomach sticks way out I feel like I am going to roll right out of my chair I am even be close to 200 I am too scared to check I will be more depressed then I already am.

bargoo
01-12-2012, 09:49 PM
The way you describe yourself you sound like a lot more than 160. I think you should see a professional to help you, your dieting or efforts at dieting are not healthy at all. Get weighed , talk to a doctor or nutritionist or somebody that will supervise your eating for awhile. You have spent too long doing it the wrong way.

Mamalicious
01-12-2012, 10:13 PM
The way you describe yourself you sound like a lot more than 160. I think you should see a professional to help you, your dieting or efforts at dieting are not healthy at all. Get weighed , talk to a doctor or nutritionist or somebody that will supervise your eating for awhile. You have spent too long doing it the wrong way.

I agree. I thought you were much heavier. I am 5'3 and a lot heavier than you and I dont have some of the problems you mentioned. Seeing a doctor is a great idea.

Huzzahforska
01-12-2012, 10:23 PM
OP, if you are for real (sorry everyone, I don't want to be brash but, my b.s. alarm is starting to go off with this one) and you're totally unwilling to listen to any of the spot-on advice that you've been given about seeking help then, I hate to ask it but, why are you here? We are here to lend an ear and be supportive, but I don't feel like you're trying to utilize this site for what it is meant to be used for.

Living on 300 calories a day is an abominable diet. You aren't losing weight like you want because you're starving yourself and your body is holding on to everything you put into it just to stay alive. Your injuries aren't going to heal unless you give your body fuel to actually try to heal.. If you stay on your current plan you're not going to get better at all, you're going to get worse. You have some severe problems with self-image, depression and your relationship with nutrition and you REALLY need to seek help, just like everyone else has said.

Please, for your safety and your life, please, please, please get some help very soon.

Enriquesgirl2
01-12-2012, 10:48 PM
I came here to talk about how I feel. There is no one else who will listen. I used to talk to someone a couple of years ago but she gave up her practice she gave me a good rate because the insurance on my job does not cover anything mental related. That is why I came here to talk I shared things I would not normally share. My mother passed away so I don't have her warnings anymore either. I just feel like this time I too far gone. Being at acceptable weight seems so far out of reach now and it is going to take such a long time, I lost a friend who did not believe I was doing what I was doing. There is a dietitan who comes in to work with the parents of the obsese children in the center I work when I get back to work maybe I can talk to her. I am sorry if I annoyed you. I will leave if you want me to,

Arctic Mama
01-12-2012, 11:24 PM
I don't know where you're getting that we're annoyed, but you are misunderstanding our tone. We are *concerned*. You are on a dangerous diet and showing severe and abnormal eating patterns, describing your body as though it were grotesquely massive, and generally sound quite depressed. We want to help you, but you need to be willing to work on some of the unhealthy behaviors you're describing.

Living off of coffee and 900 calories, even at 5' even, is a good 200-300 calories too low to give yourself adequate nutrition, and that is if you are eating whole, healthy foods and no junk (which it sounds like you're not). There are both physical (diet) issues and emotional issues you're struggling with from the sound of it, and you will have a really hard time adequately treating either component if you won't recognize the extent of your troubles, you know?

Disordered eating and thinking can destroy one's happiness, health, and can even take your life if it is severe enough. Depression has the same potential. Many of us have struggled with eating disorders and emotional disturbances to varying degrees and can relate to the desperation and pain you feel, but nobody got better by persisting in their illness. It takes a change of mind, a change of habits, and the slow development of a healthy foundation to work from, to really fix the issues plaguing us (all weight aside!).

You need to get on a scale and get a number. It is scary, but it is a start. From there, we can begin to give you calorie levels that are sensible and dietary suggestions, but without information you'll find the help you get is pretty sparse, simply because we don't have a lot to work with! There are so many smart ladies and gentlemen around here who have struggled in the same areas you describe, and they (and me!) are happy to help you out. But you've got to help us help you, by giving us some information so we can give better advice.

JayEll
01-12-2012, 11:28 PM
Good idea to talk to the dietitian where you work. That would be a good step to take.

I don't believe the 50 pound sacks of potatoes description. If you believe it, then you need to take a better look. Maybe you were just using ugly words because you feel ugly--but you need to stop doing that. It won't help you to see yourself that way.

You need to eat a good amount of nourishing food and stop punishing yourself.

Hope you get some help!
Jay

Mamalicious
01-13-2012, 09:45 AM
I believe that you know theres something wrong with your thinking and you actions, thats why you are trying to find someone to talk to. Point blank you really need the help of a professional and I pray you take heed to the advice you were given. Again, good luck.

Daki
01-13-2012, 12:24 PM
Look, I know you want this weight off NOW NOW NOW but you did not put this weight on in a week or two weeks or a month. You absolutely cannot expect it to come off in a week or two weeks or a month. You aren't grasping the concept that your current diet is HURTING your weight loss. It's hurting the healing process for your injuries. It's hurting your body.

You sound like you hate yourself. Treating your body like trash isn't going to help. You say "Oh, I'll eat 900 calories after I lose 20lbs first because I can't exercise" you can lose weight without exercising but you know what, you have to eat the right amount of the right foods.

I think you are playing dumb about the harm you're doing to yourself. I think you're making excuses for not getting help. Talking to a dietician helps but you need to address your mental health. The dietician will show you how to eat but you're always going to take it overboard if you don't address your eating disorder. You're obsessive about your calories. You're obsessive about your need for exercise. I think you need to recognize that you're sick. Healthy people do not think 300 calories A DAY is a good idea.

The reason you keep gaining weight is because of diets like this. They are not sustainable. You can't keep doing them forever because they are not healthy.

Please, look into programs your area has to offer for mental health. There are hotlines you can call. There are people whose job it is to help you find someone to talk to that you can afford. You do have options, you just have to do some research to find out what they are.

Slow and steady does win the race. You cannot expect 20lbs to come off in an instant, it doesn't work that way. Two months ago none of my clothes fit and neither did my bras. Today I'm wearing a pair of jeans that I couldn't get to zipper two months ago. I'm wearing a bra that fits because I had to buy one. I'm wearing a shirt that's too big for me. It didn't happen in a week. If you're really that uncomfortable in your clothes, GO BUY MORE! I know that feels like giving in but you can't be this impatient about it. Go to a thrift store, find a few things and wear those. Don't destroy your body because of clothes that don't fit.

Enriquesgirl2
01-13-2012, 03:16 PM
OK I am still not brave enough to step on the scale. I did muster the courage to take my measurements. Wow that was devastating for me. I am huge just like I feared
Bust 42
Waist 34
Hips 44

I was

Bust 36
Waist 25
Hips 38

I always had wide hips even when I was thin I have to be clothes that are loose on my waist to bit my hips. I went from a size 4 to a size 16 it is ten pounds per pants size I went up six sizes I gained 60 pounds, I was 111 so I must be at least 170 LBS I can not bear to see that just yet. You are all right there has to be something wrong with me to get this big. The thing that is so depressing is it is going to take so long to take this weight off. Probably a year at the least. How was it for you ? Was I hard to be patient enough . The first couple of weeks is the hardest I guess that is the starting point. Thank you all for listening to me and your support I will look into getting help. Right now I can not drive the doctor said not to because o my ankle by I will try to find someone to talk to

Vivian27
01-13-2012, 06:50 PM
I agree with everyone's advice but want to add if you cannot drive and you for some reason need help every state has crisis centers. Google online for your state's Emergency crisis centers, most hospitals have them and they offer help if in need of immediate help. You may also call 911. Please take care of yourself!!

EagleRiverDee
01-13-2012, 07:34 PM
300 calories ! Stop it right now ! You are starving yourself. .

^^^ This. You need to redefine your relationship to food and start eating healthy food in healthy portions every day, not starve yourself until you reach a goal weight and then return to the unhealthy habits that made you gain weight. This has to be a forever lifestyle change that is sustainable. That should be how you decide if a "diet" will work for you- could you do it for the rest of your life? Obviously not, with a 300 Calorie diet. Dump it, and start eating real food in real portions but reasonable portions and get a reasonable amount of exercise every day. You'll be healthier for it.

Huzzahforska
01-13-2012, 09:25 PM
You are all right there has to be something wrong with me to get this big.

You are the only one who has said this.. No one is condemning you for putting on weight (we're all here for the same reason), we are saying that, because of the way you are abusing yourself, you need to seek help. We are not judging you for your weight, we're trying to get you to see that your relationship with food and your skewed view of dieting are doing substantially more harm to you than you seem to be willing to acknowledge. So, please stop trying to convince yourself that we think you need help because you gained weight (because that is totally wrong), and try to, instead, realize that we're all concerned for your well-being both mentally and physically.

Enriquesgirl2
01-14-2012, 10:53 AM
That is why I came here for support from others who may have gone though what I have. Worked hard to lose the weight only to gain more back then they lost. It is such a horrible feeling. I do hate myself for doing gaining the weight back. While I was suffering the pain of extreme exercising when I went to bed hungry night after night I said to myself this is what you get for getting so fat and vowed that I would never do it again but I did. I feel like a failure. I should never have gotten into my history. I can't beleive I opened up like that. I am embarssed now people think I am mentally ill. Maybe I am. But I have to be careful about who I talk to I am a teacher. Thank you all for your concern and advice . I found a online support group that has I am going to look into to start.

bargoo
01-14-2012, 11:18 AM
I lost 90 pounds and did not go to bed hungry, Not once. Going hungry is not necessary to lose weight. I don't see anywhere where someone has said there is something wrong with you for getting to this weight. These are your words, not ours. there is something wrong with the way you think about it, though.
Please get weighed, you don't even have an idea of what you weigh. If you are 170 as you think, I am here to tell you 170 is not a weight that would cause people to recoil from you in horror. Many would be delighted to weigh 170 and in fact some would pick that as their goal.
Your conceptions are totally skewed. Professional help would be desirable in your case and I urge you to get professional help as soon as you can.

losermom
01-15-2012, 09:39 AM
That is why I came here for support from others who may have gone though what I have. Worked hard to lose the weight only to gain more back then they lost. It is such a horrible feeling. I do hate myself for doing gaining the weight back. While I was suffering the pain of extreme exercising when I went to bed hungry night after night I said to myself this is what you get for getting so fat and vowed that I would never do it again but I did. I feel like a failure. I should never have gotten into my history. I can't beleive I opened up like that. I am embarssed now people think I am mentally ill. Maybe I am. But I have to be careful about who I talk to I am a teacher. Thank you all for your concern and advice . I found a online support group that has I am going to look into to start.

Please stop punishing your body and mind for regaining. You deserve so much more. I know it's hard to learn to silence the harsh words in your head. But you are so worth it! Do you have family or friends close to you? I'm sure that they care deeply for you. Would you ever say the sorts of things to someone that you care about that you are telling yourself? Would they say such hurtful things to you? Please treat yourself with the same tenderness that you treat your students.

Enriquesgirl2
01-16-2012, 11:01 AM
With encouragement from a friend. I literally dusted off the scale which I have not been on in over three years only to find the battery was dead. it is a digital I swear this not an exucse. I will have to wait until tomarrow on the scale in the nurses office at work as long as nobody is around. My pants are looser but still tight when I sit down.. My underbelly as I cal lit is so fat. I know it has only been a couple of week my I am getting discouraged

EagleRiverDee
01-16-2012, 01:47 PM
With encouragement from a friend. I literally dusted off the scale which I have not been on in over three years only to find the battery was dead. it is a digital I swear this not an exucse. I will have to wait until tomarrow on the scale in the nurses office at work as long as nobody is around. My pants are looser but still tight when I sit down.. My underbelly as I cal lit is so fat. I know it has only been a couple of week my I am getting discouraged

Good for you for taking that step. And look- regardless of what the scale says, try to stop with all the negative self-talk. It's hard to change for the positive if your general attitude is negative. It can take a while, but try to change any negative talk into positive. If you start by saying, "I can't believe I let this happen. Look at me!" change it to, "Yes. Look at me. I've made a decision to start eating healthier and exercising. I've decided to stop allowing my short term desires to overcome my long term health goals. This is a good thing!" Pep talks, girl! Use them.

runningfromfat
01-16-2012, 02:52 PM
Looking at your measurements you're pretty much 100% average for an American woman (http://webcenters.netscape.compuserve.com/homerealestate/package.jsp?name=fte/clothessize/clothessize).

The average measurements are listed as:
* White: 41-34-43
* Black: 43-37-46
* Hispanic: 42.5-36-44
* Asian: 41-35-43

So NO you are not some huge sack of 50lbs potatoes, i don't believe that for one second!!!! Also, the thing about your bra? You have to be wearing the wrong size, which is going to cause an extreme amount of pain if you're trying to wear a 40DDD. If your waist is 34 then your underbust can't be 40"!!! That's insane. Measure your underbust tightly and I'm guessing it's going to be around 34" also. If that's the case start trying bras in the 34FF(try also 34G"s and 34F's too). I know some may think I'm crazy for pointing this out when there are much bigger issues here BUT I've had some major body image issues due to my bust size AND back/arm pain (look here (http://braslessinbrasil.blogspot.com/p/finding-bras-that-fit.html) for more fitting help). Getting into a correctly fitting bra can do wonders. It'll also help you to be able to do upper body exercises.

Point is. All this self-hate that is coming from you is NOT true. NOT TRUE. Say that to yourself, realize it. You can change. If those are your measurements I was MUCH bigger than you when I started losing (just seem my ticker!) and I lose eating more like 1800-2000 calories a day. 300 is too low. 900 is too low. Eat at least 1200, even if your sedentary. Get a bra that fits and then start doing upper body workouts. You know what? I can't do anything because of a crappy knee. I can't run or bike. But I lift weights, I swim. I do a lot with my upper body. You figure something out and do it.

Start small but start moving. Even if you're just doing punches while watching TV. but make sure you're fueling your body in the process.