Weight Loss Support - Compliment Hound




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twinieten
12-03-2011, 04:25 PM
I've become quite the compliment hound and was just thinking that I will miss the compliments when I'm at my goal weight and they stop. I really love it when people notice a drop and ask if I've lost weight or say how good I look. I think it's fun when people ask me how I did it. Yesterday, I wore a size smaller for the first time, and not one person noticed or said anything. I was a little bit bummed about that.

This is funny, because there are those of you who've gotten sick of it. Meanwhile, me, I can't stop soaking it up! I hope I get tired of the complements, or just don't notice once they dwindle down. It's such an ego boost, and although I thought I wasn't much for attention.... I love the attention!


rainydays
12-03-2011, 05:25 PM
It's funny, but I really don't know if there is a happy medium when it comes to compliments on weight loss. Part of me is thrilled and ecstatic when I get them, and part of me is like, toe in the sand, hands in pockets, looking at the ground, "aw, shucks," kinda embarrassed almost. On the other hand, if it's been a month or so since I've seen someone and I've lost pounds and/or inches, I do take note when they don't comment. Funny huh?

GlamourGirl827
12-03-2011, 05:37 PM
Its so funny how differently we veiw compliments and others noticing! I hate when people notice my weight loss! It makes me uncomfortable. Its like having a neon sign over my head to others around me that reads: I'm eating better and exercising!!" Just not a change in personal habits I feel like advertising.

There was a period where the weight came off fairly quickly. Not that I'm complaining, but in like a months time it was like everyone had to say something, nice, not nice, whatever. My male neighbor who I was not interested in getting a compliment from for a laundry list of reasons, told me I look good... it was creepy. Even an male in law, said something, that they had noticed, and frankly I just didn't want anyone to notice. I don't mind the remarks from women as mch, but I do not like men noticing.
Even now, we are going to visit famly we haven't seen since the spring in a few weeks, and I was a size 14 when we went out there, now I'm an 8 (sometimes 6 in some pants!!) and I know they will notice. I just hope they don't say anthing. :p


JOLINA
12-03-2011, 07:00 PM
I went out to eat with an old friend of mine today. She complimented that I looked a LOT thinner since she last saw me.

I have lost only 3 pounds since I last saw her, but I do know I have lost a lot in my face in the last month. So it seems to her I lost an enormous amount of weight.

I am glad someone notices and says something. My thin friends will compliment me. They have no problems at all discussing weight loss, fitness centers and exercize.

My chubby friends never say a word, even if I tell them how much I have lost recently. My chubby friends DO NOT want to hear any diet talk at all. And a fitness center? Never heard of it, never been to one.
:?:

I have been complimented many times and they always embarrass me;
I always feel that they have not said enough.
~ Mark Twain ~
:encore:

lin43
12-04-2011, 07:31 AM
My thin friends will compliment me. They have no problems at all discussing weight loss, fitness centers and exercize.

My chubby friends never say a word, even if I tell them how much I have lost recently. My chubby friends DO NOT want to hear any diet talk at all. And a fitness center? Never heard of it, never been to one

This is so true! On my end, I actually am hesitant to bring up weight loss issues to my friends and/or family who are struggling with their own issues but are not ready to address them yet. I feel sort of guilty and as if I'm bragging (although I'm not). Years ago, when my sister was losing weight & really enthusiastic about it but I was fat & in the dumps, I tried to be encouraging but deep down I was saying, "Don't leave me behind!" I felt that and I felt guilt because I knew I should be getting on track but I just couldn't face it at the time.

Deep down, I enjoy getting compliments, but I've always had a hard time responding well to them. Now, I just try to keep it simple--smile and say, "thank you."

twinieten
12-04-2011, 08:22 AM
...I actually am hesitant to bring up weight loss issues to my friends and/or family who are struggling with their own issues but are not ready to address them yet. I feel sort of guilty and as if I'm bragging (although I'm not)....This is true for me too. I posted this somewhere else too. Among those in my life who are actively losing weight, maintaining weight or who are health conscious, talking about my weight loss is easy, and how I did it is fun.

However, around those in my life who are heavy and who can't lose weight for whatever reason, compliments may come but discussion is dropped beyond a "thank you". Talking about it with them would be considered bragging. Sometimes I also feel guilty when the compliments come from them..... although that guilt usually doesn't last for long ;) .

Beach Patrol
12-04-2011, 08:28 AM
I've always been a comp-ho. I eat it up (pun!) when someone notices my weight loss, a new outfit, when I curl instead of straighten my hair, etc. It just FEELS good! :D

MusicalAstronaut
12-05-2011, 09:21 AM
I agree with GlamourGirl827, I've been getting compliments from creepy guys. It's like, my friends, I like getting compliments from. But there's this one older guy at work in particular who has said stuff like "When you and your boyfriend break up I'll be the first in line. Seriously" *creepy look*. And just...the *way* he comments on it creeps me out. Not like "great job, good for you!". It's like "Wow, look at that body...". *shudders* If I could get one person to stop I would choose him. Btw, I'm 22 and he's like in his 40s and getting a divorce. He's told me all about it. Ick.
But in general, I appreciate compliments as long as they're not like...hmm, how do I say this...as long as they're not like "You used to be SO FAT, wow, you lost weight and you look great now because you used to be SO UGLY AND FAT". That's how I feel when people harp on it. :P But that's only happened from a couple of people (oddly, all adult women). My friends, dad, and boyfriend have all been great about complimenting me in a way I appreciate. :)

sontaikle
12-05-2011, 10:08 AM
I generally like compliments, but it really depends on the kind of compliment given.

Nothing wrong with a "hey you're looking great!" or something that that sort, but certain "compliments" bug me.

"You look so beautiful" really bugs me because why does my weight loss have any bearing on my beauty? Was I an ugly troll before? My face has barely changed and I've still got the same curly hair that everyone raved over before. Why am I suddenly more beautiful now?

"You are wasting away!" also annoys me because no I'm not. I'm right now at the really high end of a healthy BMI so...you know, I'm far from being a waif. This compliment is right up there with "you look great, stop losing weight!" because really stop telling me what to do.

NEMom
12-05-2011, 10:11 AM
I have to admit I LOVE compliments. I have worked hard darn it, I am going to enjoy my 15 minutes while it lasts.
I do have to share my most uncomfortable compliment to date. I was at a work function on Friday evening and while I was sitting at a table with my boss beside me (male, about 63 years old) one of our board members who had not seen me for about 6 months comes up to the table and says to my boss "How is it working with such a dish in the next office". I could tell my boss was kind of shocked by the question, I tried to come to his rescue and said "Well, he sees me every day so the change has been more gradual than you notice because I have not seen you for so long. Yikes, kind of not what I want people to say to my boss.

KatieC87
12-05-2011, 10:46 AM
I feel a little bit of both actually! When I first started losing weight, I loved all of the compliments I got. Now it's a little embarrassing because it seems like it's all people talk about when they see me! Seriously, grandma, ask about school! I'm more than the number on the scale!

Beach Patrol
12-05-2011, 11:23 AM
"You are wasting away!"

oh, this is one of my FAVORITES!!!
I always follow it up (singing) "...again in Margaritaville" :carrot: :dizzy:

Lori Bell
12-05-2011, 01:26 PM
I've become quite the compliment hound and was just thinking that I will miss the compliments when I'm at my goal weight and they stop. !
Tell me about it! ;) The cruddy part about it is, I have found that maintaining my weight is about 100X's harder than losing was, (for me)...AND I have maintained for 2.5 years now, which is much longer than it took me to lose it. I want major compliments NOW for KEEPING IT OFF...:) But, alas, that has only happened once from a very sweet 90 year old great uncle.

My chubby friends never say a word, even if I tell them how much I have lost recently. My chubby friends DO NOT want to hear any diet talk at all.

Oh how true this is! I only have 1 heavier friend who really has anything to do with me anymore, the rest have all abandon me. When they do see me, I can see them giving me the once over, checking to see if I've gained any weight back...then a disappointed look crosses over their face, as to scream...Oh crap, you're still skinny. :(

I have to admit I LOVE compliments. I have worked hard darn it, I am going to enjoy my 15 minutes while it lasts.


Hey NEMom....CONGRATULATIONS!!! for reaching goal. I'm so happy for you! Way to go! :hug:

lin43
12-05-2011, 01:32 PM
I agree with GlamourGirl827, I've been getting compliments from creepy guys. It's like, my friends, I like getting compliments from. But there's this one older guy at work in particular who has said stuff like "When you and your boyfriend break up I'll be the first in line. Seriously" *creepy look*. And just...the *way* he comments on it creeps me out. Not like "great job, good for you!". It's like "Wow, look at that body...". *shudders* If I could get one person to stop I would choose him. Btw, I'm 22 and he's like in his 40s and getting a divorce. He's told me all about it. Ick.
But in general, I appreciate compliments as long as they're not like...hmm, how do I say this...as long as they're not like "You used to be SO FAT, wow, you lost weight and you look great now because you used to be SO UGLY AND FAT". That's how I feel when people harp on it. :P But that's only happened from a couple of people (oddly, all adult women). My friends, dad, and boyfriend have all been great about complimenting me in a way I appreciate. :)

This sounds like sexual harassment. I would tell him in no uncertain terms to back off, and if he continues, I'd report it to management. Sorry, but he has no right to make you feel uncomfortable like that.

ArtyKay
12-06-2011, 12:25 AM
I'm not very good at getting complimented...but there are a few people who I don't mind getting one from, and even fewer that I want them from. Like DH, I can't wait for him to notice that I'm losing weight.

There's a difference between compliments and comments. Comments are NOT welcome with me.

A compliment should be within the range of "You look great!" and "Looking good!" and should come from somebody that is a friend/relative/significant other.

A comment is somebody's opinion or thoughts on you/your weight loss. In the past I lost 35 lbs at one point, and I've gotten:

"Where'd the love handles go?" Seriously?

"You look so good now!" What, as opposed to when I was fat?

"What's your secret?" *sigh*

"How much did you lose?"

"How much did you weigh before?"

"Have a donut/cookie/piece of cake, you don't need to diet anymore." Everybody at work knew I was on a diet, and all started trying to push food on me.

"You've lost a lot of weight! I was starting to worry about you.." this was from my brother. :tantrum:

I just hate when the general meaning behind a comment/compliment is "You used to be fat, but now you're not as fat!!! Yay you!!!"

They hurt even worse now that I've gained most of the weight back. :(

I just think that its incredibly rude to comment on a person's weight in pretty much any way.
It also bothers me that when you make a life change, such as moving to a new house, getting a new boyfriend, or losing weight, getting a new haircut...that people think its appropriate to start bashing your old house,old boyfriend, old body, old haircut. Like all the mean, snarky things they were thinking come out, and its okay now?

Nuh uh.

I say people should keep their negative thoughts to themselves, and that there's a very fine line between paying somebody a nice, genuine compliment and making a passive-agressive comment.

Anyway. :o That became a rant, I'm sorry.

melodymist
12-06-2011, 03:02 AM
I hate when people notice my weight loss! It makes me uncomfortable. Its like having a neon sign over my head to others around me that reads: I'm eating better and exercising!!"
:p

Same here!! I don’t get it why I get weird looks over choosing an healthy option over fast food.






However, around those in my life who are heavy and who can't lose weight for whatever reason, compliments may come but discussion is dropped beyond a "thank you". Talking about it with them would be considered bragging. Sometimes I also feel guilty when the compliments come from them..... although that guilt usually doesn't last for long ;) .

I have to agree. Maybe we feel like this because we lost the weight or are still losing it and they haven’t made the decision for themselves.


I generally like compliments, but it really depends on the kind of compliment given.

Nothing wrong with a "hey you're looking great!" or something that that sort, but certain "compliments" bug me.

"You look so beautiful" really bugs me because why does my weight loss have any bearing on my beauty? Was I an ugly troll before? My face has barely changed and I've still got the same curly hair that everyone raved over before. Why am I suddenly more beautiful now?

"You are wasting away!" also annoys me because no I'm not. I'm right now at the really high end of a healthy BMI so...you know, I'm far from being a waif. This compliment is right up there with "you look great, stop losing weight!" because really stop telling me what to do.

I get this ALL the time. I also got skeleton the other day, WHAT?? I have a BMI of 23.7 but I’m a skelton, whatever.:dizzy:

ChickieChicks
12-06-2011, 07:19 PM
LOL about "What's your secret?" I HATE THAT! Um...let's see...you don't REALLY want to know how difficult it was....must have been MAGIC! (eyeroll)

twinieten
12-07-2011, 07:57 AM
"You look so good now!" What, as opposed to when I was fat?This one doesn't bother me, interestingly enough. I guess because I kind of think the same thing. I never thought I looked good fat. I thought I looked terrible. I'd see large women who looked good and I figured I couldn't possibly look worse than them. Yet I couldn't bring myself to believe it. I was just not comfortable in my own skin.

"What's your secret?" *sigh*
LOL! I know. My secret? Count calories, exercise, Bodybugg...... Sometimes that's followed up with, by the person who asked, "I can't do that. It's too complicated". OK, whatever. I ran out of magic pills, sorry.

They hurt even worse now that I've gained most of the weight back. :( :( I can see why.

You make a good point about compliments vs comments. People should be careful what they say, or how they say it. Sometimes the well meaning comments can be hurtful.

sontaikle
12-07-2011, 08:22 AM
LOL! I know. My secret? Count calories, exercise, Bodybugg...... Sometimes that's followed up with, by the person who asked, "I can't do that. It's too complicated". OK, whatever. I ran out of magic pills, sorry.


LOL about "What's your secret?" I HATE THAT! Um...let's see...you don't REALLY want to know how difficult it was....must have been MAGIC! (eyeroll)


LOL I get this all the time. When I mention eating less or counting calories in addition to the exercise I was doing for years people get all bent out of shape for some reason.

My theory is that they're expecting me to have lost it by some seemingly impossible means—diet pills, an extreme diet or exercise plan—so that they can feel better about their own failures to lose weight. If it seems "impossible" to them then they don't have to worry about losing weight. When it's actually not impossible....well they get upset.

ArtyKay
12-07-2011, 02:36 PM
My theory is that they're expecting me to have lost it by some seemingly impossible means—diet pills, an extreme diet or exercise plan—so that they can feel better about their own failures to lose weight. If it seems "impossible" to them then they don't have to worry about losing weight. When it's actually not impossible....well they get upset.

That's so true...when you answer with a "blood, sweat and tears" type response people seem put down...like they were expecting for you to endorse some easy fix?

If weight loss was easy we'd all be slim and trim. :cool: