30-Somethings - Turning 30 any advice ??
11-03-2011, 02:13 AM
Hello! In 11 short days I will be turning 30. I had a small freak out two weeks ago but still don't feel 100% about turning 30. I am feeling all the pressure of society having a career master degree family/ kids house financial stable ideal body and weight etc... I am barely getting by as it is and that extra pressure all in my head cause no one really has told me this is not making it any easier to lose weight. I just keep self sabotaging my attempts.
Any advice on how to get out of this rut!?! Does it get better are my self expectations crazy? what do my 30's bring? :?:
11-03-2011, 09:35 AM
I would like to know too as I will be 30 in 7 days. I am trying to think about it as just another year but then I get freaked out too........
11-03-2011, 09:36 AM
Hi and Welcome! I just turned 30 last year and really, it wasn't bad at all. Just another day, really! Only you can put those unrealistic expectations of what you "should" have achieved by a certain age.
11-03-2011, 12:26 PM
I didn't think turing 30 was a big deal. Do I wish I was younger yes, but I didn't have kids until I was 30 and it wasn't a big deal. I think you might be freaking out too much. It's ok. Just vow to make your next decade your best!!
11-03-2011, 01:31 PM
I turn 30 in 3 months. I'm not really freaking about it though like I thought I would.
I know so many women in their 30's who are enjoying life so much more than in their 20's because they just know so much more about themselves (this is what I've been told by them). And they are clearly much more happy and stable people, regardless of what they are doing in their lives, than they were when they were even just 5 or 10 years younger.
Career? Master's degree? Financially stable? I just work on being happy :D
I never finished university (I did finish college, but I don't use my diploma at all), I have a job that really isn't a "career", I carry a lot of debt.. I'm married but my husband and I are child-free which freaks people out ("What? You're almost 30, you better have some kids before it's too late to change your mind!" ... silly people, I will never change my mind), we don't own a house and probably never will (too expensive)...
We break all the social-norms that I suppose we're "supposed" to have by now. But you know what?
It doesn't matter! Because we're super happy and enjoying life.
If you enjoy life, why worry about all of those "shoulds" other people place on your shoulders? There's no such thing at the end of the day. Life is purely what you wanna make of it in any given moment.
11-03-2011, 08:32 PM
I just turned 31. I didn't want to turn 30 last year. I had a lot of big changes I wanted to make in my life and I think hitting the big 3-0 without a career, marriage, house, kids, etc... (all the American dream stuff you're supposed to do) made me sad. So I changed.
In the last year I have lost 60lbs, ran 4 marathons, doubled my income with a new career with a great company (and had a job interview today for a promotion with the same company!), left an unhealthy abusive long term relationship, built new friendships, started counselling for the depression I have suffered from since my teens, got the braces I have wanted for my teeth for the past 20 years, and I'm shopping for my first home.
You can let another year pass you by, or you can change. The time will pass either way.
11-04-2011, 11:14 AM
Don't worry about turning 30, when you are a woman it is ok to stay 29 for the rest of your life. :dizzy:
11-04-2011, 11:32 AM
It is cliche, but age is just a number. You don't drastically change from 29 to 30 in one day. I turn 30 in a couple months and I am using the milestone to motivate my weightloss. You still have plenty of time to find a significant other, have children if you want and work on your career! 30 is still young! Your thirties will bring whatever you make happen!
11-04-2011, 11:52 AM
Don't worry about turning 30, when you are a woman it is ok to stay 29 for the rest of your life. :dizzy:
I like this. :D
11-04-2011, 10:19 PM
Wow!! Thanks everyone! I feel motivated!! I was thinking today, after a hard workout , about doing a list of things I want to accomplish by the age of 40. Like a list of 10 things one for each year. Fun thing really fun!! Again thanks so much ladies!!
11-05-2011, 03:08 AM
I'm 32, and I love being in my 30's. But I also don't have any issues with getting older, when I see myself in the future I always imagine myself in my 80's tending to my garden.
I remember having a moment in the mirror on my 30th birthday, where I looked at myself and couldn't believe I was 30, it was shock more than anything, but it quickly passed. If you live long enough, you're going to get older, it's just life on life's terms. But I think the goal is to age well and truly enjoy your life. You couldn't pay me to be 20-somehing again.
11-05-2011, 03:52 PM
i turned 30 last year, it really wasn't a big deal! it is just a number!
11-07-2011, 11:37 AM
I am 38 soon to be 39 , When I turned thirty it was great. I enjoyed my life more and it didn't freak me out. As thirty isn't as old as you think it is, Heck I am even eager to see forty, isn't forty the new twenty or something like that?
Thighs Be Gone
11-07-2011, 11:41 AM
As you grow into your full potential, you must learn a few rules. I am still learning. But here is one that will ring true, come what may!
Rule #1. Forget about what Society expects and find what works for YOU!
11-11-2011, 12:18 PM
Totally agree with Raine! I'm 32, and I already did alot of the "expected" things in my 20s - got married, bought a house, had a "career" type job. Then got divorced, sold the house, got laid off from the job, all by the time I was 30 lol. Now I'm living with my boyfriend, in an apartment, and working at a job that pays nearly half what my old one did. And I'm sooo much happier. Don't worry about what's expected, or accomplishing things by a certain age. Just do what's important to you, right now, and the rest will sort itself out. :)
11-11-2011, 06:29 PM
When I think about turning 30 all I see is the progress that I have made during the last 10 years. By no means am I where I wanted to be, but I have progressed and for me that is a wonderful felling. The closer I get to 30 the more I feel like a real "adult". 30 is the age where we really began to gain control of our lives (at least in my opinion). I have never felt more confident in myself as whole and complete women than I do now. The older I get the more secure I am in myself and I expect that when I hit the big 3-0 I will be even more confident. Turning 30 is great!!!!!
.......However if none of these things offer you much solace then remember 30 is the new 20 ;)
11-12-2011, 02:40 PM
I turned 30 4 years ago. I too was all apprehensive, feeling old and fat, feeling like I should have accomplished more...
The day I woke up and was 30, all that went away. I was looking forward to FINALLY be seen as an adult. I thought about how my experience could help me get further. How my 30s were going to be awesome!!!
There wasn't any one thing that got me out of my rut. But I've liked my 30s. There hasn't been any pressure really, except from myself. You will enjoy it!!!!!!!!
11-17-2011, 09:00 PM
I really do feel a lot better! I celebrated with my friends and family and it made me feel great about see and feel the love no matter what age I was. I have been doing a lot of mental/emotional processing this past 3 months and its really helped me become happy! letting go of all this mental grief and road blocks has been great. Again thanks everyone!
Untamed: Thanks for sharing! That was such an eye opener!
Thighs be gone: Share more of those lessons!
11-19-2011, 10:36 AM
I think turning 31 was harder for me than 30... kinda weird, and 32 bothered me as well... That's why I am working like crazy now to make sure 33 goes a lot better. I think when you are happy with yourself the number won't bother you as much... if that makes sense LOL
11-20-2011, 04:53 PM
people keep asking me how do i feel about being in my 30s, I am 32 by the way, the first time i heard that question i was so angry but i count to ten then i said to the person who asked me:
well, I look like 20s
I feel like 20s
i have the experience,wisdom and charm of 30s
so yes i love being in my 30s...
the only thing i wished i idid it in 20s is reaching the weight i want, but i will do it in my 30s
so that is extra thing why 30 is amazing age
11-27-2011, 12:50 PM
I will be turning 31 in a few months. Honestly I love being 30. I'm in best shape of my life, and working towards true inner happiness, something I didn't know in my 20s. When the big 3-0 approached, I had some of the expected things done, married, kids, college (though I want to continue) but some things I hadn't, I wanted to have more schooling done, a better position in my field of study, we rent not own...
But the most wonderful thing happen at 30. Mentally it did sonething to me. I started to see life as an experience, not a race. I started to feel more like an adult, because I think the rest of the adult world thinks "kid" when they hear twenty...
It really sunk in that I will not be alive forever, and I really began enjoying my life, and searching for peace with the hardships I endured in my younger years.
I am also someone that did not peak in high school, and I would say who I am, my appearance and what I have to offer the world improves with age.
I started to feel sorry for those people that were super popular, super pretty, had lots of money (well their parent's money) nice things, and just thought they were the cat's meow in highschool and even their early 20s. Because I still know some of them now, and its like their life was so great then, it had no where to go but down. Or at least they let themselves believe that. And a few of them really do live in the past. What a sad existance to spend your life wishing you could go back to one age.
For me, I know the best it yet to come. In exchange for all life has to offer and all I have yet to see, learn, and do I will grow older, but its worth it.
I also think about the people I've known along the way that have died young. When I was in highschool, our junior year two students from our class were killed in a car crash. They were 17. I wasn't close to them, but I had a few classes with them. Sometimes I think of all the things I've lived since 17, and how they never got that chance. And I imagine all that I will get to live over the next 20 years, and I hope I get th chance to do it. I would never want to be forever 29. Growing older, to me, is a gift.