General chatter - Kids in expensive resturants




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Carisa
10-04-2011, 01:23 PM
Am i the only one who cant stand to go into a romatic expensive resturant and see a bunch of kids running around???? Drives me nuts now im to the point where i send my husband in 1st to do a kid count and if its more than around 5 and they ARENT sitting QUIET we move on. :?: Next WHY do parents think people want to tolerate their kids running around like they have no home training??? RUDE! I mean McDonalds IS ALWAYS open.


Lambiechop
10-04-2011, 01:25 PM
Hate. If I can get a babysitter so I can go out to a nice restaurant why can't other people? It frustrates me to no end.

treasureBelle
10-04-2011, 01:47 PM
I don't really like it either. Fancy restaurants just aren't designed for children - at least, not to play in.
I don't generally mind if they're sat nicely and are well behaved, but I do agree it's quite inconsiderate when parents let their kids run round the restaurant like they're at a playground. I mean, apart from the other customers, there's also the employees to consider. Waiting staff are constantly running around with hot plates etc... the last thing they need is small children in their way.
My sister had a waitressing job this summer... they were expected to work quickly and efficiently, for example like having a cup of coffee to the table within three minutes of it being ordered. She wouldn't have been pleased if, when carrying a hot plate/heavy tray or whatever, she had to negotiate a route around children.


tinneranne2
10-04-2011, 01:50 PM
IMO: In public, adult places (like fancy restaurants or live theatre performances) if you're child can't behave as everyone else (ie: use inside voice, stay seated with your party) then you need to escort them out. I know kids are kids and they can't be held to an adult standard...which is why I think its unfair to place them in that situation to begin with. There are youth theatres and family restaurants for this very reason. Bottom line: If your child can't "blend in" with the crowd someplace...they probably shouldn't be there.

Maybe it was just me growing up, but you sat at the table until dinner was over, not until you got bored/whined/whatever. And you NEVER ran around a restaurant. You never even wandered off sedately..because if you did, that was the last time you got to go out to eat for a very very long time.

EagleRiverDee
10-04-2011, 02:06 PM
I'm mixed. I recognize that a lot of parents don't have the option of having a sitter take care of their kid, or they aren't comfortable with it, or what they are really looking for is a family night out WITH the kids but they don't want to eat McD's for the 13th time that week. I get that.

That said, parents need to keep their children under control. I don't mind children in theaters or fancy restaurants when they are well behaved. Some parents are good about it, some aren't. Honestly, I find CELL PHONES to be more annoying than kids, usually.

sacha
10-04-2011, 02:28 PM
I'm a mom and if we can't get grandpa to babysit, we go to a kid-friendly restaurant. There's really no need or excuse for it. Yes, it sucks to not go out nearly as often as before, but that's a price of parenting to be paid. Besides, why would I want to pay for a nice romantic dinner when I have my boy throwing food on the floor or people staring at me.

berryblondeboys
10-04-2011, 02:35 PM
But maybe people's ideas of what's fancy and what's not is different. Like, I don't consider Cheesecake Factory as fancy - some people might. Basically, if it's a small, quiet place, non-chain sort of place with real candles and dim lights, then it's not for kids. But there's a big range of what is in the middle.

But no matter where - kids should be good. I have two boys and if I can keep them good, then anyone can keep their kids good.

kaplods
10-04-2011, 02:57 PM
My parents always took us out to nice restaurants, even as babies, but there were strict rules. If a baby cried and couldn't be consoled very quickly with a pacifier or bottle, one of the adults (or teens) would take the baby outside.

Until we were older, we weren't allowed to leave the table without permission and an older escort. If we misbehaved we had to go outside with one of the adults or teens.

Many strangers would compliment my parents on how well-behaved we children were. They still get the same compliments with the grandchildren.

If there was a paper placemat, we were allowed to draw on it. If there wasn't, we were allowed to bring something very small (and quiet) to play with. And they talked with us, and allowed us to talk.

We were always allowed to pick the restaurant on our birthdays, and I always chose a fancy restaurant (my brother usually chose pizza or burgers).

When I was living near my sister, I passed on the love of nicer restaurants to my nephew. At three years old, when asked where he wanted to go to eat, he always said "a table restaurant," meaning a sit-down, nice restaurant with table cloths. His favorite restaurant at the time, was an indian restaurant (which shocked my sister and my parents, because they thought the food was too weird and spicy for a kid to like - but my husband and I had taken him in the spirit of adventure, and he loved it).

I have mixed feelings about the "playland" restaurants, where kids are allowed to run and be wild. I know parents and kids love them, but they've become so common that I think both children and parents are losing the sense of what is proper in a restaurant. You now will see parents completely ignoring or worse, watching with amusement as their children run amok in a nice restaurant (and even smiling and saying "kids will be kids," if you dare give them a critical look).

4myloves
10-04-2011, 03:27 PM
But maybe people's ideas of what's fancy and what's not is different. Like, I don't consider Cheesecake Factory as fancy - some people might. Basically, if it's a small, quiet place, non-chain sort of place with real candles and dim lights, then it's not for kids. But there's a big range of what is in the middle.

But no matter where - kids should be good. I have two boys and if I can keep them good, then anyone can keep their kids good.

Do you offer an obediance traning course, kinda like for dogs, but for my daughter? :dizzy:

berryblondeboys
10-04-2011, 05:03 PM
Do you offer an obediance traning course, kinda like for dogs, but for my daughter? :dizzy:

Believe me - I have kids - one with strong ADHD and the other with high functioning autism. AND... we don't go out very often. But, they've always known to be good and they have. Now... running off in the grocery store - that's another story.

Suzanne 3FC
10-04-2011, 05:21 PM
At least when kids act up in restaurants they are just being kids.

Think about the adults who are loud, abrasive, inconsiderate of other diners, or rude to the wait staff. IMO they are the ones who should stay home!

mzKiki
10-04-2011, 06:09 PM
I've taken all 3 of my kids out to "nice" places since they were newborns. It's always been my intention to show my children how to dine out, eat properly, speak quietly, use correct utensils and generally hone their social skills from an early age.
The 1st 2 worked out GREAT! They all love going out to restaurants. However the baby of the bunch (2yr old) is the problem. NONE of my children run around or act unruly, but she is a crier. I've taken her outside before when it's gotten really out of hand. But all in all she's basically good.
I really don't feel like 3 minutes of crying will ruin anyones dining experience. But if I was at an establishment where children were actually running around I'd complain to the manager. After all you are a paying customer and there is no reason for you to have to tolerate that.

cbmare
10-04-2011, 06:12 PM
We took our girls out to nice restaurants from the get go. They had to learn in a hurry that sitting through the entire meal was required and no loud voices or noises. Like Kaplods, paper placemats were fair game for coloring and writing until the food came. I did try and have something in the car for their amusement, maybe a little book to read or some such if there were no paper placemats.

I really feel for the wait staff. If one of those little brats runs out in front and gets some hot soup spilled on them, then the restaurant may be sued.

The other day we were in a nice, not upper scale, but well above Denny's and there were some people there with 2 kids, 1 and under. I understand that a 1 year old is still playing with their voice but they can be told to be quiet. The mother actually said she tries to ignore him when he lets out those screams. I turned around and glared at her and I actually said something after about 3 minutes of that screaming. I told her that she can ignore it all she wants at home but some of us come out to enjoy other peoples company and that a screaming child drowns out conversation at OUR table. She started paying attention to him and the rest of the restaurant patrons could enjoy their meal.

That said, I have to say that IA about cell phones. Some guy was sitting next to us one time and had obviously gotten his first phone. He was entertaining himself by playing ALL the ring tones. We had to ask him to turn it down. He didn't realize there was a volume control on the blasted thing.

98DaysOfSummer
10-05-2011, 02:36 PM
I just don't really see that many kids in fine dining restaurants, but I do see plenty of kids who don't behave well in more family-oriented places. Just because I can buy a hamburger here, that does not mean I want to hear kids yell and cry or that the rest of us are a baby sitting service for the people who let their kids run around.

We go out to eat with our five year old fairly often, but I don't think she's every been some place really REALLY nice. I am saving that kind of thing for date night. She does know how to behave, and she would be fine in that kind of place (if a little bored) but I don't see the point in spending several hundred dollars on a meal to feed a kid.

InsideMe
10-05-2011, 02:46 PM
I know it drives me nuts too. And if my kids start acting up, they are in crap. We pack up and go. I've done it before so they know when I say it I mean it. So far so good. I can't stand kids running around like crazy! Those parents need to get some parenting classes or call Nanny 911....seriously they aren't doing the kids any favours in teaching them manners or appropriate behaviours. I don't think it matters what restaurant your in, fancy or Macdonalds, you HAVE TO BEHAVE! And I tell them that and if they don't they know the consequences. We leave. It's so sad cause those kids need guidance, structure, routine etc... it's the parents fault. I would hate to see them in their teens! Then the parents will wonder "what the **** happened, why are they breaking the rules?"

aka8941
10-05-2011, 03:08 PM
I don't really even notice it. I've never seen a child in a REAL upscale restaurant.

Munchy
10-05-2011, 03:47 PM
I just don't really see that many kids in fine dining restaurants, but I do see plenty of kids who don't behave well in more family-oriented places. Just because I can buy a hamburger here, that does not mean I want to hear kids yell and cry or that the rest of us are a baby sitting service for the people who let their kids run around.

We go out to eat with our five year old fairly often, but I don't think she's every been some place really REALLY nice. I am saving that kind of thing for date night. She does know how to behave, and she would be fine in that kind of place (if a little bored) but I don't see the point in spending several hundred dollars on a meal to feed a kid.

Ditto! My kid would eat many other cheaper things over a $50 meal from a nice restaurant. I never see kids out at fancy spots, or if I have, I never noticed.

I definitely do see poorly parented children at family restaurants. I was just out with my friend, her 10 and 11 year old daughters and my barely four year old daughter and our three girls all sat nicely and ate their meals on the outside patio of a specialty burger restaurant.

Meanwhile, one woman near us had her two daughters running around outside on the patio area, one sitting at the bench right outside of the restaurant door, and then the waitstaff even came to talk to mom outside because her kids went into the restaurant alone.

The daughters CONTINUED to run around while this mother just sat and ignored them. I couldn't get over how disruptive these kids were and how complacent the mother looked. :mad:

April Snow
10-05-2011, 09:59 PM
I don't think that families going out to eat with kids should be limited to McDonald's. If there is a kids menu at a restaurant, then I feel like people are on notice that they may be kids there. I certainly expect my child to behave appropriately but anyone who is put off the mere fact that kids are in a restaurant is the one with the problem IMO. But if it's a fancy enough place that there are no kids menus, then I take that as a sign that it's not meant for children.

EZMONEY
10-05-2011, 10:29 PM
I'm 57 and Angie and I go out almost every week at least once for date night. I will admit we usually go to locally owned places and not chain restaurants but we do go to those also.

I really can't think of anytime that a child ruined my dinner except for one...

She was the 5 daughter of a woman I was dating after my divorce. I really liked thelittle girl but she was a pain in the butt/out of control...when seeking attention. She embarrassed me a couple of times when we took her out with us...to family style places...my kids, who were a few years older were embarrassed!

The mother would bring in a truck load of toys for her to play with....and expect her to be good. She would run all over the restaraunt....go up to tables of customers...my daughter took her to the potty and came out MAD as he$$...she said the little girls was crawling under the stalls!

The kid was a kid.....with absolutely zero discipline! Mom was a cutie but the way she handled her child was a deal breaker for me!

juliana77
10-05-2011, 10:37 PM
My son (8) has gone to a fine dining restaurant several times. We sit near a window so he has something to look at without disturbing others. He knows how to be quiet and well-behaved while at the table for the most part, and I do let him play games on my (muted) smartphone between courses or when he's finished eating. That said, I have never seen another child in there, and there is nothing on the menu he likes (they make him some pasta with marinara sauce). I tip well to make up for the special requests and everyone is happy.

I am not ok with kids running around at anyplace nicer than McDonalds. Stay in your seat! If a kid is crying, or misbehaving and disturbing people, take them outside.

shishkeberry
10-06-2011, 04:28 PM
I don't think that families going out to eat with kids should be limited to McDonald's. If there is a kids menu at a restaurant, then I feel like people are on notice that they may be kids there. I certainly expect my child to behave appropriately but anyone who is put off the mere fact that kids are in a restaurant is the one with the problem IMO. But if it's a fancy enough place that there are no kids menus, then I take that as a sign that it's not meant for children.

Yeah, that. Especially the bolded part. We're all trying to get healthy, right? Expecting us to stick with McDonald's when we have kids isn't really setting them a good example. I have a son with suspected ADHD (haven't gotten an official diagnosis yet) and although he sits at the table with us and knows better than to run off, he is loud. He has trouble regulating the volume of his voice. Mostly it's because he loves to sing at the top of his lungs. But if you're at a restaurant with a kids menu, you have to expect loud children. I try my best to keep him from singing, but we have trouble with that at home, too. Should I be expected to never leave my house because my son loves to sing and forgets that he's not supposed to do it so loud?

sontaikle
10-06-2011, 05:20 PM
I think it's really silly to expect that children be excluded from expensive restaurants. They need to learn how to behave in certain situations and sometimes the best way to teach them how is to actually take them to places.

That said children who can't behave themselves shouldn't be taken to nice restaurants.

CloudySky
10-06-2011, 05:50 PM
Let me tell you all a story. I have this daughter who had the most extreme separation anxiety and I couldn't leave her with anyone! I know some moms just dump them off and let them scream and feel abandoned and figure they'll get over it, but I would not enjoy myself, or do that to begin with. So after not having a date alone with my husband for a really long time (since we got married), our anniversary came around. I tried to get her to stay in a church nursery, with my best friend, my sister-in-law (weeks ahead of time) and it was not happening. She was 9 months old back then by the way, nursing, and refused bottles from birth. Well, we decided we were going out for our anniversary anyway and took her along. We got all dressed up and went out to dinner somewhere nice that cost us an arm and a leg, and of course she made baby noises the whole time and people gave us ugly looks the whole time which made me very uncomfortable and kind of ruined the night for me. I understand that it's annoying, but it is what it is. I agree people letting their kids run all over and be atrocious should not be in nice restaurants though. There are fancy places that don't allow people under a certain age... perhaps try those out?