Weight Loss Support - I keep on starting weight loss plans but I have a hard time staying on plan




seabiscuit
09-13-2011, 10:24 PM
Hi there chickies...

I feel so frustrated right now :(

I have started weight loss plans but have a hard time staying on track. I don't put enough effort into it, maybe that is the problem or maybe stress gets the best of me and I stress-eat and throw my hands up in the air of defeat then try to get back on. Maybe it is both those issues plus I rebel against structure but the reality is I need to lose this weight!!!!! I have joint, liver problems from my weight gain and while I have lost quite a bit, I don't know how to get a focus back to get on a weight loss plan and stick with it.

Let's see what I have tried:

Weight Watchers, I tried them recently and gave up after about a month because I got sick of counting my points and felt like I was constantly going over my points. I did lose a little but gained it right back. A few years ago I reached my 10% goal too!

Medifast, I tried that awhile ago and about a week ago placed an order of 4 boxes total of different things to see if I would be able to eat these meals on a regular basis instead of real food and after trying them, I don't think it is going to work.

Overeaters Anonymous, I have done well with that, had 90 days abstinent, but then IDK, I think the cravings came back really bad and I just wanted my way again instead of abstinence. I am debating going back to OA, and think it's a good program, I just have issues with constantly having to report to a sponsor.

Jenny Craig, I did well with them too. I got tired of the food and got tired of the expense and quit and have debated going back but again like with Medifast don't know how well I will do without "real food"

I just don't know which way to go now! I have so many reasons to lose and I do have a history of stress-eating and bingeing but I have improved a lot with that.

Thanks chickies...


Ryler832
09-13-2011, 11:12 PM
Since you've tried many different approaches and it Isn't right for you why don't you try counting calories. That way you can still allow some indulgence if you stay within your daily max calories. By counting calories you won't feel deprived and best of all it's free.

indiblue
09-13-2011, 11:30 PM
I was going to suggest calorie counting too.

For some people, a structured packaged program, like the ones you've tried, works great. For me, I need something that I know I can stick with the rest of my life. I need something that limits the AMOUNT of food I eat, not the TYPE of food.

That's why CC'ing works for me. I don't have to subscribe to it, it doesn't cost money. It's something I can do for the rest of my life. It teaches me LIFE changes that are sustainable. Once you get the swing of counting calories and eyeballing portion sizes (after weeks/months of weighing measuring :)) it's not that much mental math. And the mental math you do have to do is worth it, because you lose weight as a result :)

Just my two cents... wish you all the best!!


tuende
09-13-2011, 11:33 PM
First of all, I feel you on this. I too have gotten to the point where I feel like I've tried everything and nothing stuck. Unbelievably frustrating! I have 2 suggestions:

1) Look at those past attempts as places to learn about how to move forward. From your posts, it looks like pre-packaged food is out. Eat "real food", count the calories, decide on your own calorie limit, be in control, be your own plan. If OA worked for you, by all means go back! Maybe the accountability isn't all bad. At any rate, take a deeper look into what was successful and what got in your way in the past and use that info to guide your decisions.

2) Really think about why you want this, why it matters to you. You mentioned some health concerns. Any other reasons? Write 'em down. When the 'why' is clear in my mind, I can put up with a lot of the irritating and not-so-fun things about weight-loss.

I read on here recently something along the lines of "if you want it, you'll find a way; if you don't, you'll find an excuse." Find a way. Lose the excuses. Looks like you've successfully lost a good bit of weight, so you're doing something right! Keep your chin up and stay in the fight- you can SO do it!

April Snow
09-13-2011, 11:52 PM
I don't know if it would fit your personality, life style and food tastes, but I am doing a very low carb, low fat plan called the Dukan Diet. And even though it's a pretty restrictive plan, it has been the easiest thing to stay on plan that I have ever tried, and I've tried plenty. I started on 5/22 and have been on plan every single day - and it's not a struggle at all. I found that once I completely eliminated grains (except for 2 tbs oat bran a day that is on the plan), sugar and starches, I don't get cravings for them at all.

If you have any interest and want to know more, feel free to ask here http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/other-reduced-carb-diets/232592-dukan-diet-support.html

kaplods
09-14-2011, 12:18 AM
I have a hard time sticking to my food plan too. In fact, I don't think I've had a perfectly-on-plan week or more than one or two consecutive perfectly-on-plan days in all 94 lbs lost.

In the past, I would give up when I couldn't stick with a plan, because I thought perfection was required for weight loss. When my weight loss wasn't as fast as I wished it would be, I'd tell myself "well, you'd lose more, if you stuck to your food plan."

But that would morph into "you won't ever succeed if you can't learn to stick perfectly to your plan."

And then, when I couldn't stick perfectly to plan, I would convince myself that I couldn't succeed and therefore I'd give up.

Turns out I didn't have to be perfect to succeed, I just had to not give up.


There's often an unspoken myth to weight loss that you have to be perfect to succeed, and if you can't be perfect, you might as well give up.

We think "if you can't do it well, don't do it at all."

I think the opposite is true "if you can't do it well, do it half-as*ed."

You could say that I've lost all 94 lbs by the half-as*ed method.

You don't have to be perfect, you don't even have to be anything close, you just have to do better. Eventually, it will pay off.

tkdtara84
09-14-2011, 12:23 AM
Something that has really helped me is the Beck Diet Solution. It's a book that teaches you how to follow a diet-- any diet you choose. It's more about behavior modification-- e.g. teaching you how to avoid cheating, get right back OP if you do cheat, etc. I have really noticed an improvement in my adherence ot my diet (Metabolic Research Center). There are forums here for both Beck and MRC.

Anyhow, I firmly believe that almost any diet will work if you follow it, so the key is finding something you can/will follow. That's why I like the Beck book so much. It would help me no matter what plan I chose. I've done WW, calorie counting, Atkins, South Beach, Suzanne Somers, and MRC. I've been overweight my whole life, so the dieting started for me when I was 13. I had the most success with MRC, so that's why I chose to do that again after having my baby. However, I honestly feel much more in control due to the Beck book, so I think I could be more successful on calorie counting or WW if I chose to go back to that.

OneStepAtATime
09-14-2011, 12:28 AM
I'm afraid I don't have any good advice to give. Yesterday, I made a thread almost identical to this one...I too have done the weight watchers, OA, etc. Right now I'm back to calorie counting.

Mostly, I just wanted to give you my support. And if you find anything that works, let me know! We seem to be going through some of the same problems right now.

Tai
09-14-2011, 12:57 AM
Maybe try calorie counting and see how you like it. I choose it because it wasn't too difficult and it's free!

It seems like you did well and liked OA. Is it possible to do the program and be abstinent without a sponsor?

JayEll
09-14-2011, 06:55 AM
Hello! Your post sort of sounds like, "I just can't lose weight--I've tried everything." But from what you wrote, it sounds to me like you're right when you say maybe you just haven't put enough effort into it and you get rebellious.

Yes, you have to count points on WW. If you give up after 1 month, well, that's that. Even if you do calorie counting on your own, you'll have to count, weigh, and measure foods.

Every day on Medifast you must eat "real food." It's the lean & green meal, and it is healthy and filling. It sounds to me as though you tasted a few of the Medifast meals and just decided you didn't like them. That's not "trying Medifast," really.

OA--checking in with a sponsor is really a good idea because it can help when you are thinking you want "your way" back again. It's called support.

So--my suggestion would be that you choose a plan, make a commitment to it, and follow directions. No need to second guess, decide whether you "like" it or not--just follow directions. When you find yourself thinking, "Oh, this isn't working, it's too much trouble, I'm sick of it," realize that that's the voice of the "kid within" who just wants her goodies, all of them, right now. Don't put her in charge!

And if you slip up, don't let that throw you off the plan completely! Just get back onto the plan you have committed to and keep going...

I wish you luck!
Jay

lin43
09-14-2011, 08:15 AM
I was going to suggest calorie counting too.

For some people, a structured packaged program, like the ones you've tried, works great. For me, I need something that I know I can stick with the rest of my life. I need something that limits the AMOUNT of food I eat, not the TYPE of food.

That's why CC'ing works for me. I don't have to subscribe to it, it doesn't cost money. It's something I can do for the rest of my life. It teaches me LIFE changes that are sustainable. Once you get the swing of counting calories and eyeballing portion sizes (after weeks/months of weighing measuring :)) it's not that much mental math. And the mental math you do have to do is worth it, because you lose weight as a result :)

Just my two cents... wish you all the best!!

I agree with this. Also, what has really helped/inspired me this time around is having an app on my smart phone to track my calories. It makes it SO much easier than in the old paper-and-pencil days of tracking. The foods I eat regularly are saved, so just a couple of touches and I've entered my food.

If you're not up for calorie counting, what about just committing to adding one or two new good habits a week? That gradual approach works for many people. It may not be the fastest approach, but I sense that you're looking for longterm solutions, right?

Lovely
09-14-2011, 08:42 AM
I don't think you need a new plan necessarily. I think you need a new perspective on what "succeeding" is.

After reading your list, it seems like when the going got tough, or when you thought you were making a mistake (or about to make a mistake) you just... gave up entirely! As if making a mistake was the worst thing, and if it was kinda hard why do it at all?

If we all did that, no one would be losing weight for more than a month.

In order to change your perspective, maybe you need to change your focus on what a plan is. A plan is merely a guide to changing your habits.

Because no matter what plan you choose, you're always going to have to monitor your food/eating in some way, and you will at many, MANY points be making mistakes along the way.

Maybe focusing on the habits themselves help you see it differently. Think of them as additive instead of subtracting something.

Add a daily walk.
Add in more fruits and vegetables to your meals.
Add in a weekly support group.
etc, etc

After all, if a person makes a mistake with a habit, it's really no big deal. "Oops, forgot my walk yesterday. No big deal. I'll take it today." "Oops, forgot my baby carrots as a snack yesterday. No big deal. I've got them packed up for today."

There's no need to pick a specific food plan to start if you're really unsure, but maybe start making a list of the ones that made sense to you. Or start crossing them off if they are non-negotiable. If "real food" or minimizing packaged meals is a must on your list, then it's okay to cross off ones that don't offer that. If group support is a must on your list, then start searching into programs that offer it.

You'll find a way. It takes effort, yes, but we don't have to push ourselves so fast that we get burnt out.

carter
09-14-2011, 09:03 AM
To the OP: I find myself nodding most in agreement with both Jay's post and Kaplods. I agree with Jay in that I think your opening to this thread betrays a little unwillingness to do the hard work of losing weight. I'm not saying you feel that way all the time, but it's the tone of your post - this was too hard, that was too hard, I got tired of having to report.

Weight loss isn't easy. If it were, none of us would be here. You do at some point have to discipline yourself to say "no!" to the inner three-year old who wants to have her way all the time.

Having said that, I also agree with Kaplods that you do not have to do this flawlessly in order to have success. You can slip up, you can give in to the three-year old sometimes, you can have temper tantrums of self-pity. I do all of these things, and then some, and I've still lost 100 pounds in two years. I did that by getting right back on plan after a slip-up - not the next Monday, not even the next day, but the very next food choice.

So here is what I suggest. Go back and look at your past experiences again. This time don't focus on what you didn't like about them, but think about what worked for you about each one. Consider calorie counting too for all its advantages as others have suggested. Then pick one, the one that fits best with your needs and lifestyle, and promise yourself you will follow it for three months. And then do that, with the attitude adjustments of (1) acknowledging that this is going to take some work, and being willing to do that work, and (2) acknowledging that you will not be flawless for every moment of every day, and promising yourself you will get right back up and on plan whenever you veer off it.

Beach Patrol
09-14-2011, 02:13 PM
Since you've tried many different approaches and it Isn't right for you why don't you try counting calories. That way you can still allow some indulgence if you stay within your daily max calories. By counting calories you won't feel deprived and best of all it's free.

I agree with this, and not just because I am counting calories, but because, like the OP, I have tried so many diets... I have lost weight on almost all of them, but eventually went back to "old eating habits" & gained it all back, plus more. So what's the point of losing weight then, right?

Counting calories allows ME to be IN CONTROL of what I eat or don't eat. I am adamant about eating foods I love, and not eating something just because it's "on the list/available/part of a program/etc." With calorie counting, I CAN still have a cookie or a slice of pie. I CAN still have a margarita! I CAN still have thick, juicy steak AND potatoes and I CAN STILL LOSE WEIGHT. And my favorite advice in the whole wide world, "You can have ANYTHING you want... but you can't have EVERYTHING you want."

All those "programs" you've tried? You've proven THEY ARE NOT THE RIGHT WEIGHT LOSS PLAN FOR YOU. Counting calories IS easy, and also, as Ryler pointed out... FREE. What could be better?? :D