[2BMeAgain757]

I am a 30 yr old mother of a beautiful 7 yr old boy. Every day I am killing myself with food, and i don't know why I cannot stop eating. I eat all of the worst things possible...high in fat, sugar, and I pile on salt. I know all of the right things to do, but it's like there is a blockade in my mind telling me, that I will not, cannot, do not want to give up my freedom to eat and drink whatever I want, at any given time. I have written down 100 ways in which my life would be better if I could control my weight, but alas I still choose to remain defeated. I am so depressed that I have absolutely no willpower over food, and my health. Has anyone out there felt this way...like there is an imaginary barrier or impass your mind will not allow to cross, for fear of giving up on all of the pleasure unbridled living (eating, drinking, socializing) can bring? Funny thing is, I know on the other side of this lies freedom I can only imagine...freedom to be confident, freedom to be uninhibited by the shame of my body, an ultimately the freedom in knowing that I am not a ticking time bomb, and that I do not have a pressing expiration date!!! I love life and I am too young to die, but @ 220 lbs and gaining, I can't help but believe if I do not get myself under control, this will be inevitable...

[Lovely]

At some point there's a level in our heads. And it weighs out the benefits of change versus the benefits of staying the same.

We might have 100 reasons for changing, but with staying the same there is comfort in things we already know, and the thrill and comfort of food itself.

People think of diets, or healthy living and they sometimes imagine this world where the only thing you eat for the rest of your life is raw celery and cottage cheese. It's the furthest thing from the truth. (Though there's nothing wrong with either food!)

We're fond of saying "this is not a diet, it's a lifestyle change", because it ISN'T a diet. This is life. From the moment we decide we're making a change...big or small change... this is still living. You don't have to flip a switch and refuse to eat your favorite meals ever again. But, we do have to learn moderation. We do have to learn portion. We do have to learn how to incorporate true choices.

Now, we can't eat whatever we want whenever we want without counting it, but quite frankly, I don't mind making compromises and keeping track of my food, because it's giving me more than I had before.

You don't have to be ready for a big change right now. Maybe you're ready for small, healthy changes. Or maybe you're just ready to read up on how others have done it.

There's no "wrong" stage. You know what you're capable of committing to right now

[proudmommy09]

I feel you sooo much, I couldve wrote this, except I have two small children, I hope that you find your drive and your "want to " and stick with it!! I have all or nothing thinking which Im working on......