Weight Loss Support - Smart come backs needed to weighty comments!




Michelle2008
08-18-2011, 02:04 PM
So I am doing pretty well with my new lifestyle and the scales are moving in the right direction. But I am struggling with peoples comments and even though I feel good about my weight loss I am starting to feel self concious!!

My weight loss isn't dramatic or particularly rapid but my work colleagues have started commenting on how skinny I am (as if!) or simply look me up and down and say 'you've lost weight'. This is always followed with comments on how I should stop or a patronizing 'are you eating' or worse comments about how big I used to be!

None of these are compliments so I can't just say thank you and change the subject - but I can never think of a polite response which is appropriate and closes the subJect. It's not that I want compliments - I would rather people didn't mention it. Thee was even a conversation about weight loss being a sign of serious illness!

I still have quite a few pounds to lose - and I am dreading the comments intensfying.

Please ladies - any witty/ smart / miss manners style come back?


luciddepths
08-18-2011, 02:15 PM
Its a compliment that they even noticed! I always say "I have!!! Thank you!!!" It does close the conversation.

JOLINA
08-18-2011, 02:49 PM
Just tell them in your friendliest manner:
"I've been on a diet and lost 10 pounds. How many pounds do you plan on losing?"

When you turn the tables on them, they get very uncomfortable and change the subject. Your weight is fair game, but not theirs. I find they blush, get really flustered, and walk away real quick.

(Some might ask you for advice though. So be prepared to be very nice to some of these people.)

Nobody has ever talked to me about my weight loss twice, except for just one friend. She is very supportive of me and is going to be joining a gym to lose about 20 pounds. We discuss weight loss at great lengths. But still, she knows I have lost 10 pounds (out of the 44 that I lost!). I don't want to be the center of gossip between my friends and famly, so I just tell them I have lost 10 pounds.

Once someone asked me how many more pounds I planned on losing. I told her I am all through dieting for this year. Maybe next year I will try for another 5. Then I asked her how many pounds she planned on losing. Wow, was she shocked! I always ask them the same questions they ask me. You'll be surprised how uneasy some of these people become. They don't expect to be questioned. LOL

One person asked me what size I wear. The nerve! I told her "I am between sizes, but what size do you wear?" Then I told her I wore 2 sizes larger.

They think nothing of putting you on the spot, so put them on the spot too.
(But smile and be nice. Some of these people are well meaning.)

:devil:


PreciousMissy
08-18-2011, 02:59 PM
If it is insulting just simply tell them "thank you. I have a goal that I am still working on and am doing it in a slow healthy manner." and in the same breath, before they can ask another question or make another comment, change the subject.

ennay
08-18-2011, 11:06 PM
My weight loss isn't dramatic or particularly rapid but my work colleagues have started commenting on how skinny I amCOMPLEMENT - thanks or simply look me up and down and say 'you've lost weight'COMPLEMENT - yes, thanks. This is always followed with comments on how I should stop COMPLEMENT - thanks, subject change or a patronizing 'are you eating' SNIDE - Well, not at this moment, I am workingor worse comments about how big I used to be! SNIDE - at least IVE done something about it -and walk away

None of these are compliments so I can't just say thank you and change the subject - but I can never think of a polite response which is appropriate and closes the subJect. It's not that I want compliments - I would rather people didn't mention it. Thee was even a conversation about weight loss being a sign of serious illness!so is weight gain

I still have quite a few pounds to lose - and I am dreading the comments intensfying.I could have sworn we talked about this already. I dont want to bore you with my weight loss saga. No, no! its just rude for me to keep going on about it

Please ladies - any witty/ smart / miss manners style come back?

You only need to be as polite as they are being...no more, no less.

But at the same time look at all the threads on here where people are upset because no one noticed.

Beach Patrol
08-19-2011, 11:40 AM
If it's a "nice compliment" just smile & say "thank you" & then QUICKLY change the subject "that's an awesome necklace, where'd you get it?"

If it's a not-so-very-welcome comment (i.e. "are you eating? - you used to be so big!") just give the very straight-faced & pretty simple comment of "my body, my business" (said with a ****eating SMILE, of course) :s:

fitmom
08-19-2011, 11:44 AM
If it's a snide remark: How about just rolling your eyes and walk away laughing? Works for me, lol.

If it's a genuine remark: Just smile and say, "thanks".

Lovely
08-19-2011, 11:49 AM
I agree with everyone above.

Anything that can even potentially be considered in the realm of a compliment, such as "You've lost weight" can be answered with a quick "Yes, I have, thank you. Say did you get that e-mail about xyz? How crazy is that?"

Anything that might be a busybody or uncomfortable, such as "Are you eating?" Well, you have choices. "Yes... are you?" or "Very healthfully, thank you. [Change subject]" or "Uh... that's a weird question to ask a co-worker...[Change subject]"

They might ask. You have no obligation to give them any juicy answers.

Michelle2008
08-25-2011, 01:05 PM
Thanks everyone!!! Some good advice which I will be deploying!!

Lurker89
08-25-2011, 01:34 PM
When they tell you that you should stop, tell them you're trying to get heavier and ask them how they managed it.

- L89

FatNoMore03
08-25-2011, 02:25 PM
"Whatever I've lost, it seems you found them." Got this from a movie with Sylvester Stallone, Arnold Schwazenneger and Bruce WIllis. HILARIOUS.

Arctic Mama
08-25-2011, 02:57 PM
I agree with being as polite as they are being, no more or less. If they are noticing your losses and commenting on them in good faith (even if somewhat awkwardly) I'd give a cheerful 'thank you! I'm trying to be as healthy as possible and feel great!'. If they're being more negative or critical, I'd simply comment that what you eat or do isn't their business and that their comments aren't appreciated.

Most people either wish you well or take the hint, don't give their comments more power over your mood or feelings than they deserve :)

Congratulations on your losses thus far!

BeachBreeze2010
08-26-2011, 09:04 AM
What I always find awkward is when people ask me how much weight I've lost. I know they mean well and are supportive, but I feel like I am telling them how much I weigh especially when they can see that I still have more weight to lose. I usually just answer the question and then try to change the subject. I haven't had anyone say anything to me with ill intentions, so I try to let it roll off but that question is always weird.

bargoo
08-26-2011, 09:33 AM
Just tell them in your friendliest manner:
"I've been on a diet and lost 10 pounds. How many pounds do you plan on losing?"

When you turn the tables on them, they get very uncomfortable and change the subject. Your weight is fair game, but not theirs. I find they blush, get really flustered, and walk away real quick.


:devil:

I think this is the best answer I have ever heard !

Mary79
08-26-2011, 09:36 PM
BeachBreeze2010 - I can't figure out how to quote you! Anyway, your response sounded so much like me!

In the past, this always stopped my weight loss - like when people starting asking how much I've lost and I tell them, then I quit losing. So this time, I purposefully don't keep track of the total. Of course, I have a general idea, but honestly don't know the correct total. I know how much I weigh (pretty close) and if I looked up my records to my starting point, I could do the math. But for this very reason, I don't.