Games - Corrupt a Wish Game

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07-27-2011, 10:32 PM
(I didn't see one of these already when I looked through this forum.)

Basically, the person above you will make a wish. You grant it yet find someway to make it corrupt.

Example: I wish I had a million dollars.

Granted, but it's all in pennies and you can't exchange them for larger bills.

So on and so forth. Once you corrupt someone else's wish, then you make your own for the next person to corrupt.

I wish the next four months would hurry up and be over with.

08-02-2011, 06:19 AM
Granted, but you're summoned to jury duty at the end of the 4 months and the trail lasts 1 month.

I wish I my room would clean itself.

08-02-2011, 06:10 PM
Granted, but it gets OCD about itself and decides your belongings are garbage too and throws it all out.

I wish this game would pick up. xD

08-02-2011, 06:26 PM
Granted... the game picked up VD... better use protection

I wish I had cute new clothes

08-03-2011, 01:23 PM
Granted, but the 'cuteness' came from from the fact that they're all baby clothes.

I wish I had a sandwich.

08-03-2011, 02:02 PM
Granted, but it's literally made of sand with sandpaper slices.

I wish the laundry machines weren't in the basement of the building.

08-03-2011, 03:31 PM
Granted, they are on the roof

I wish a had a personal chef

08-03-2011, 03:46 PM
Granted. However, he only knows how to cook one recipe. Haggis.

I wish I lived near the ocean.

08-03-2011, 03:56 PM
Granted, you live in a storm-prone region near the Arctic Ocean

I wish I could run faster

08-03-2011, 06:27 PM
Granted, but you have to do it on all fours to maintain stability.

I wish the people in my livingroom would be quieter. xD

08-03-2011, 06:38 PM
Granted, but now you live with a bunch of mimes.

I wish I could find a job making six figures a year.

08-03-2011, 08:51 PM
Granted, all of those figures are zeros.

I wish I could have a magic wand!

08-03-2011, 10:33 PM
Granted, but its a conductors wand

I wish I could have world peace!

08-03-2011, 11:06 PM
Granted but all the humans die.

I wish I wasn't so bloated. =/

08-03-2011, 11:10 PM
Granted but now the world news wants to know how you did it and are camped on your front porch for 2 weeks

I wish my kids would just go to bed already!

08-03-2011, 11:45 PM
Granted, but they will but insist on sleeping in your bed, and you're stuck sleeping in a twin bed with Yo Gabba Gabba sheets.
I wish my car ran on vegetable oil.

08-03-2011, 11:54 PM
Granted but the local restaraunt that you work at is siphoning it out of your tank to cut costs

I wish my hubby didn't have to work till 12am tonight.

08-03-2011, 11:58 PM
Granted... but since he was rushing to get home to you he got a speeding ticket, and then you fought about it when he got home.

I wish my husband would stop going bald.

08-04-2011, 12:04 AM
Granted, but his body hair grows so much that it looks like he's wearing a sweater at the beach.
I wish candy bars grew on trees.

08-04-2011, 12:27 AM
Granted... but when you went to go pick some one fell from the tree, hit you right in the temple and you croaked.

I wish I was a genius.

08-04-2011, 12:30 AM
granted but you are a genius in the feild of weed pollination and you use your yard as your testing spots

I wish that my basement was remodeled

08-04-2011, 12:31 AM
Granted, but you are driven insane realizing how corrupt the world is.

I wish I would just work out already!

08-04-2011, 11:42 AM
wagfam- granted, your basement was remodeled to look like a dungeon
sarrawrnaomi- granted, but you pulled a muscle

I wish I had a more interesting job

08-04-2011, 04:19 PM
Granted - you are now a secret agent and travel all over the world, but you can never make any connections with anyone because you will put their life in danger so you are doomed to roam alone...

I wish I could wake up tomorrow at my goal weight.

08-04-2011, 05:07 PM
Granted - you wake up tomorrow at your goal weight, but all of the scales in the world have mysteriously ran out of batteries!

I wish for a raise at work.

08-04-2011, 05:13 PM
Granted, your office is now on the 45th floor and all the elevators are broken

I wish I could have the ability to teleport to anywhere in the world.

08-04-2011, 05:32 PM
Granted... you teleported to a desert and couldn't teleport out.

I wish I was a good cook.

08-04-2011, 08:28 PM
Granted, but then you eat everything you make and ruin your excellent progress.

I wish butter had negative calories.

08-04-2011, 08:37 PM
Granted, but it has 200 grams of fat per serving.

I wish my boobs would go back to C cups, haha.

08-05-2011, 11:52 AM
Granted but now they are on your back :(

I wish money would really grow on trees

08-05-2011, 11:56 AM
wagfam- granted, your basement was remodeled to look like a dungeon
sarrawrnaomi- granted, but you pulled a muscle

I wish I had a more interesting job

I actually did pull a muscle the other day. lol :(

08-05-2011, 03:55 PM
"I wish money would really grow on trees"

Granted, but it turns brown, brittle and unusable the moment you pluck it from the tree.

I wish my coffee would stay warm.

08-05-2011, 03:57 PM
"I wish money would really grow on trees"

Granted, but it turns brown, brittle and unusable the moment you pluck it from the tree.

I wish my coffee would stay warm.

Granted, but it's so hot it burns your tongue and never cools down.

(is this right?? LOL).

I wish I only had to work part time.

08-05-2011, 04:11 PM
Granted, but your co-workers keep calling out, and your boss keeps telling you that you have to make up their time and come in on your days off.

I wish cheese had no calories.

08-05-2011, 04:17 PM
Granted, the cheese has no calories, with no flavor just a yellow appearence.

I wish I could have a pay raise.

08-05-2011, 06:36 PM
Granted, but inflation makes it useless.

I wish the semester would start now.

08-05-2011, 06:39 PM
Granted, but it's one week long, you have to read 20 books, write 15 research papers and pass 10 tests.

I wish my husband would cook supper tonight!

08-05-2011, 08:41 PM
Granted....Grab that bottle of BEANO

I wish my wife would allow get off this Dr. Who on TV kick

08-05-2011, 08:55 PM
Granted: Remind her (gently) of how easily one can change female sidekicks (as proven by the Doctor) ;)
(then get out of arm's reach :p)

I wish there were more hours in the day.

08-05-2011, 10:37 PM
Granted, you now have far more chores to do, each of them take up the time added to the day.

I wish there were an easier way to get all my grocery bags up three flights of stairs.

08-05-2011, 10:38 PM
Granted but that mean you have to work those extra hours.

I wish that I had an unlimited bank account.

08-06-2011, 12:25 AM
Granted, but it can also be accessed by unlimited people.

I wish I had an airplane ticket.

08-06-2011, 01:03 AM
Granted but it's a one way ticket to Timbuktu

I wish I could hit a curve ball

08-06-2011, 01:40 AM
Granted but you end up taking out the windshield of a brand new bentley

I wish I would never feel sad

08-06-2011, 09:00 AM
Granted, but in exchange you can never feel sleepy ever again!

I wish the heat would go away!!!!

08-06-2011, 10:36 AM
Granted... now it's 20 degrees below zero for the rest of the summer!

I really wish I would hit the powerball (it's up to 180 million!)

08-06-2011, 01:35 PM
Granted, but through a cruel twist of fate you and 179 million others also get the right numbers, so all you get is $1 before taxes.

I wish my husband would turn OFF ESPN for a day!!!

08-06-2011, 02:09 PM
Granted, but in exchange he plays video games all day.

I wish I could wake in Bora Bora with a sexy man.

08-06-2011, 10:28 PM
Granted, but when he leaves he steals all your money and valuables.

I wish I had my sleeping schedule on track before school starts.

08-06-2011, 10:52 PM
Granted, but now you fall asleep at exactly your bedtime no matter where you are or what you're doing.

I wish I could stop craving something sweet tonight.

08-07-2011, 01:55 AM
Granted, now you are craving somthing salty.

I wish I wasn't so achy tonight.

08-07-2011, 02:02 AM
Granted but you'll be achy for the rest of the week after tonight.

I wish I could tell him the truth.

08-07-2011, 09:28 AM
Granted, but from here on out you can ONLY speak the truth, no matter how the other person takes it. (Them: "Do these make my butt look big?" You: "YES, they do!")

I wish the house cleaning fairy existed and would visit me!

08-07-2011, 10:39 AM
Granted but it also means the Messy House Fairy exists and he comes in right after...

I wish my rent was $300 lower than it is

08-07-2011, 12:34 PM
Granted, but now all your other bills are increased by $300!

I wish i didn't have to work today.

08-07-2011, 01:41 PM
Granted, but it's because your workplace was warped to an alternate dimension and you can't get to it anymore.

I wish I had a Blu-ray player

08-07-2011, 02:26 PM
Granted but it warps your discs so you cann't watch anything.

I wish I had more time before I have to go away to school.

08-07-2011, 08:44 PM
Granted, you're expelled, get a job.

I wish this download would complete so I could run!

08-07-2011, 09:58 PM
Granted, but your computer melts down and crashes into a useless pile of rubble so you can't use it.

I wish tomorrow wasn't Monday!!!!

08-07-2011, 10:18 PM
Granted, it's Tuesday, and now you can't remember what you did for the Monday you skipped.

I wish a good song would play on the radio.

08-08-2011, 01:02 AM
Granted, but now your ears fell off so now you cann't hear.

I wish I wasn't so hungry.

08-08-2011, 09:24 AM
Granted, but now you're overwhelmingly thirsty ALL. THE. TIME.

I wish I had more coffee.

08-08-2011, 11:09 AM
Granted, the coffee will not stop overflowing our of your cup

I wish I had a strawberry smoothie

08-08-2011, 11:18 AM
Granted, but it's made with strawberries, not low-fat yogurt and TUNA.

I wish I had a new computer in my office.

08-08-2011, 12:04 PM
Granted, but there is nothing in your office but the computer.

I wish I had an Iced coffee.

08-08-2011, 12:09 PM
granted, they put so much ice in it, you only get a few sips and it's gone

I wish I had prettier feet

08-08-2011, 12:16 PM
Granted, your feet are beautiful but they're a size 15....

I wish I had better skin.

08-08-2011, 01:04 PM
granted, but you become increasingly acident-prone and gain a multitude of scars on your once-perfect skin

I wish my co-worker would stop asking me to review EVERY file she works on

08-08-2011, 01:22 PM
Granted but now instead of reviewing them you have to take in her work load.

I wish I could go on vacation

08-08-2011, 01:50 PM
Granted, you've been fired.

I wish I had the day off.

08-08-2011, 01:52 PM
Granted, but it's an unpaid day off.

I wish I could have a brand new diamond ring for my anniversary.

08-08-2011, 02:24 PM
Granted but it turns your finger green.

I wish my computer wasn't so slow!

08-08-2011, 02:27 PM
granted, your computer is now fast but prone to crashing often

I wish good furniture wasn't so expensive

08-08-2011, 02:42 PM now have to build all your furniture from here on out.

I wish someone could fix our air conditioner at work.

08-08-2011, 03:05 PM
Granted...but now its constantly -40 every day in the building

I wish my dishes would do themselves.

08-08-2011, 03:36 PM
Granted, but they do a horrible job and you're always having to re-wash them anyway

I wish the comcast guy would call me back

08-08-2011, 07:09 PM
Granted but instead of helping you with your cable he asks you out and doesn't take no for an answer.(although this wouldn't be corruption if the guy was hot LOL)

I wish I could afford the wedding of my dreams

08-09-2011, 01:36 AM
Granted but now you don't have enough for the honey moon.

I wish that I could get everything that I need to do tommarow done.

08-09-2011, 02:04 AM
Granted but tomorrow turns into a loop like groundhog day and you end up having to live the same day over and over again for years.

I wish there was real magic in the world and that I was a part of it.

08-09-2011, 02:07 AM
(Oh I so wish that, too, and I hate to corrupt it...)

Granted, unfortunately there are plenty of people who start to use it for dark purposes and it ends up corrupting just about everyone who uses it!

I wish my breakfast would make itself in the morning.

08-09-2011, 02:59 AM
Granted but you get food poisoning...every morning!

I wish I could have a designer purse

08-09-2011, 03:09 AM
Granted, but the purse is so small that you can't fit a single thing in it and end up having to carry your old purse just the same.

I wish for more British comedies in the world.

08-09-2011, 08:46 AM
Granted, but everything else turns into a Japanese game show.

I wish I could buy a new pair of running shoes.

08-09-2011, 12:30 PM
Granted but when you put them on you can never stop running.

I wish I knew what to have for lunch.

08-09-2011, 12:43 PM
Granted, but now you have to have that same thing for lunch forever.

I wish I had more energy today!

08-09-2011, 03:05 PM
Granted, but you won't have enough energy to get out of bed for a week.

I wish everything goes well when I see my Doctor today.

08-09-2011, 05:22 PM
Granted... but insurance doesn't cover your 1 million dollar bill as a result!

I wish my body looked like Jennifer Lopez's

08-09-2011, 05:28 PM
Granted...but then you have to marry Mark Anthony.

I wish it was time to go home!

08-10-2011, 01:26 AM
Granted...but when you get to your car all your tires are gone.

I wish I could fly.

08-10-2011, 01:31 AM
Granted... you've now turned into a bat.

I wish I could get off my bum and start cleaning this room.

08-10-2011, 04:21 AM
Granted...but now you have OCD and it's never clean enough!

I wish I could walk in heels

08-10-2011, 11:04 AM
Granted, but you wear them backwards and look rediculous

I wish my computer would stop asking me to reboot every 15 min

08-10-2011, 11:08 AM
Granted, but now it just crashes every five minutes instead.

I wish the crazy people would stop coming in here today.

08-10-2011, 11:10 AM
Granted...but I will return tomorrow!!

I wish my wife would make me breakfast....

08-10-2011, 12:44 PM
ha ha

Granted, but it's liver, onions and tuna paté.

I wish I had a new car.

08-10-2011, 01:59 PM
Granted, Its a brand new matchbox car.

I wish The rest of the week was as cool as it is today!

08-10-2011, 04:19 PM
Granted, but next week will be 10 times hotter.

I wish my headache would go away.

08-10-2011, 04:25 PM
Granted, but now your foot aches instead!

I wish I could find a nice house at a reasonable price!

08-10-2011, 06:51 PM
Granted but it is nextdoor to an airport.

I wish I was more organized.

08-11-2011, 10:19 PM
Granted but you have been banished to a 4' X 4' room to organize all your belongings...

I wish hot dogs weren't so bad for me...

08-12-2011, 12:54 AM
Granted but now they taste like cardboard.

I wish I had made better eating choices today.

08-12-2011, 12:57 AM
Granted, but now the choices you made the day before yesterday became much worse.

I wish I could see the stars from my room.

Tanna Banana
08-12-2011, 01:10 AM
Granted- but that hole in your roof isn't going to be any fun when it rains.

I wish my hands and feet weren't constantly the temperature of the surface of the sun. (thank you pregnancy)

08-12-2011, 01:26 AM
Granted-but they're ice cold and you can't move them.

I wish I could find a job that I loved and paid more than I make now.

08-13-2011, 11:39 AM
Granted but it's far away from family.

I wish gas prices would come down

08-13-2011, 12:23 PM
"I wish gas prices would come down"
granted but now you have to pay an admission fee to get into a gas station

I wish pizza had no carbs :(

08-15-2011, 01:58 AM
Granted, but all the carbs are replaced with fats. D:

I wish I could find textbooks without having to pay an arm and a leg for them.

08-15-2011, 02:13 AM
Granted: but on the first day of class you find out you have the wrong edition, making them near useless.

I wish that my husband wasn't so grumpy this weekend!

08-15-2011, 02:15 AM
Granted, but now he's super sleepy and you can't get him to get out of bed.

I wish that I could get back onto a normal sleeping schedule.

08-15-2011, 06:13 PM
Granted, but your best friend suddenly have insomnia calls you every night for a 4 hours long chat.

I wish I had a 4.0 GPA.

08-15-2011, 06:30 PM
Granted, but you moved to Australia and they grade out of 7

I wish I would stop breaking out (I'm too old for this many zits)!

08-15-2011, 10:36 PM
Granted, but it requires $400 per month in skin care products to achieve.

I wish baking didn't heat my apartment up so horribly in the summer.

08-16-2011, 03:52 AM
Granted! Now when you try to bake your oven is broken and won't heat anything.

I wish I could get motivated to do all the things I've always wanted to do.

08-16-2011, 12:30 PM
But... but... Aw, crud.

Well fine, your wish is granted, but there are now enormous, 5-year waiting lists for all the things you've wanted to do. Even if it's as simple as visiting a new city. Nope, sorry, the city is not accepting new visitors until 2017. AND all of your activities require 30 page application forms. So there. :p

I wish the landlord next door would finally remove the darn broken branch that's been hanging in my window for four months!

08-17-2011, 02:22 AM
Granted the branch gets taken down and placed on your bed....

I wish I could wake up with my hair instantly styled to my liking.

08-19-2011, 12:14 AM
Granted- it's styled beautifully when you hop out of bed but when you get to work it looks awful.

I wish I could get a good night's sleep.

08-19-2011, 01:01 AM
Granted...but you fall asleep early, forgetting to pick up your usual daily lottery ticket......and your numbers hit.

I wish the laundry fairy would show up and take some of this never-ending chore off my hands.

08-19-2011, 01:04 AM
Granted, but more roads are given tolls. D:

I wish I could lose some weight this week! :D

08-19-2011, 03:54 AM
(I don't want to corrupt this one because I wish for the same thing) have lost weight because all your hair fell off...

I wish my husband wouldn't frustrate me so much!!

08-24-2011, 04:02 AM
Granted! But now your husband finds you frustrating all the time and cant stand to be around you day in and day out.

I wish my husband would have more sex with me! mwahahaa!

08-24-2011, 06:20 AM
He does twice a day in fact! But alas he has lost his signature moves!

I wish I weighed 100 pounds less.

08-24-2011, 10:08 PM
Granted but you lost all on only the top half of your body :P

I wish my beloved pasta would make me drop weight instead of gain it!

08-25-2011, 12:04 AM
Granted- but that yummy super-secret sauce that your aunt makes causes you to gain a lb for every tbsp you eat of it >:D

I wish I could control water! XD

08-25-2011, 01:48 AM
Congrats! You can now control water. Oops... global warming causes it all to evaporate away forever. ;~; Useless mutant power.

I wish that it's nice weather for when I go to the museum tomorrow.

08-25-2011, 01:59 AM
Sunny skies with white puffy clouds for you tomorrow. However, when you arrive for a day at the museum, it becomes a night at the museum, and all the exhibits come to life (and, as a bonus, you get to meet Ben Stiller--and I don't know if that is a benefit or a corruption).

I'd like a maid to clean this endless mess of a house....send one over, please.

08-25-2011, 07:54 PM
Granted, you get a maid to clean the house, however, she brings her 5 children with her who are uncontrollable and break everything not put up.

I wish I had long, thick, and healthy hair.

08-25-2011, 08:16 PM
Granted! Long, thick, healthy hair... is now growing from your armpits.

I wish I were a better cook.

08-25-2011, 10:27 PM
Granted- but due to global warming and the lack of water there are no crops... so no veggies, fruits, spices, or anything for you! (But if the water comes back I'll use my mutant water controlling powers and give some to you XD)

I wish my school schedule was better!

Tanna Banana
08-25-2011, 10:32 PM
Granted, but all of your teachers now speak with thick accents.

I wish I had a pint of ice cream right now.

08-26-2011, 12:14 AM
Granted, but your ice cream has melted and is sour.

I wish I had a brand new car.

08-26-2011, 11:44 PM
Granted...but it is being recalled in 3 years for everything!

I wish I could drive a tank down our freeway...OVER the cars!

08-28-2011, 12:05 AM
Granted, but it's a remote controlled toy tank and it gets smushed by one of the cars. :D

I wish I would get called back for that job!

08-28-2011, 12:10 AM
Granted, but the job involves a 2 hour commute each way in rush hour traffic and working weekends is mandatory.

I wish I had a new shoe wardrobe.

08-28-2011, 01:01 AM
Granted, but all of the shoes are a tad too small and pinch your toes.

I wish I had a maid who did all of the laundry and dishes.

08-28-2011, 02:44 AM
Granted, but all your clothes were shrunk 2 sizes too small and all your dishes were broken.

I wish I could go on a vacation for a week.

08-28-2011, 03:31 AM
Granted..but while on vacation you get shipwreaked and have to live your life out on a tiny island with a bunch of strangers.

I wish we could nab the loser who stole my husband's iPod.

08-28-2011, 04:29 AM
Granted...But it turns out the loser who stole it dropped it in a puddle and cracked the screen.

I wish I had a sexy new car. Vroom vroom!

08-28-2011, 06:55 AM
Granted but it has no engine or tires.

I wish I had a new washing machine!

08-28-2011, 05:10 PM
Granted, but your new washing machine is Barbie sized..

I wish I could have a better vertical jump.

08-29-2011, 01:31 AM
Granted, but your jump only increases by 1/2 an inch.

I wish I had slender fingers.

08-29-2011, 03:02 AM
Granted! You now have fingers like Nosferatu.

I wish I could get my car fixed this week.

08-29-2011, 03:47 AM
Granted, but now you cant drive to due to all the roads in your town being flooded with 4 feet of water.

I wish my boss would shut his trap!

08-29-2011, 05:57 AM
Granted, but now you have to try and understand all his hand gestures.

I wish I could fall asleep.

08-29-2011, 06:04 AM

But now you find yourself always tired

09-03-2011, 10:50 AM

But now you find yourself always tired

Not sure what the wish was, but um... Granted! And then ants show up at the picnic!

I wish I could see into the future.

09-04-2011, 02:00 AM
Granted but you can only see milliseconds into the future...

I wish I could grow my hair on command (kind of like the barbies back then where you could pull more hair out LOL)

Faith Autumn
09-08-2011, 01:16 PM
Granted, but it all grows in the wrong colors!

I wish I could fly!

09-12-2011, 08:55 AM
Granted, but now there's more traffic, meaning you'll take longer to get to places and use more gas anyways.

I wish that I would make my End of September goal.

09-15-2011, 12:08 PM
Granted, but it will be the end of September 2012.

I wish someone would pay my son's college tuition.

09-15-2011, 07:52 PM
granted but he ends up with a degree in Queer Musicology from UCLA

i wish i had sparkling white teeth

09-15-2011, 08:55 PM
Granted, but they are dentures.

I wish someone would clean my house.

09-15-2011, 08:58 PM
Granted! But the cleaners were from the state pen!
They LITERALLY cleaned you out!

I wish I could find the magic formula to get me out of this 3 month plateau!

09-15-2011, 09:06 PM
Granted, but you won't be losing weight, you're pregnant.

I wish my dog would stop shedding.

09-15-2011, 11:37 PM
Granted, but you won't be losing weight, you're pregnant.

{{FAINTS}} I wouldn't need to lose any in this case, I'd be DEAD! :rofl:

I wish my dog would stop shedding.

One shed-less K9 coming up, but wouldn't you know it, poor Fido has the mange! EWWE!!!

I wish I could run my race scheduled for tomorrow night, instead of being stuck at home in misery with TOM!

09-16-2011, 01:59 PM
Granted, no misery and no race since you are pregnant and you won't be getting TOM:D

I wish summer wasn't over.

09-18-2011, 09:47 PM
Granted...but it's 105 degrees for 365 days in a row.

I wish I had a PT Cruiser!

East TN

09-20-2011, 09:30 PM
One PT Cruiser coming right up! Neon Green, Double the cost, and a lemon to boot--the air doesn't work and the windows don't go down in that 105 degree heat!

I wish our dayshift head nurse would find a job on another unit--preferably on one I would never ever work on!

09-20-2011, 10:37 PM
I probably shouldn't grant your wish after you granted mine....but I couldn't help myself!

Granted. The head nurse is transferred to a Psyc Ward. And you are NOT working there. You've been committed there. Now she has full charge over you.

I wish I could wake up in the morning with a perfectly clean house (and I was not the one to do it)

09-20-2011, 11:43 PM
I probably shouldn't grant your wish after you granted mine....but I couldn't help myself!

Granted. The head nurse is transferred to a Psyc Ward. And you are NOT working there. You've been committed there. Now she has full charge over you.

I wish I could wake up in the morning with a perfectly clean house (and I was not the one to do it)

That was :devil: ish!

09-25-2011, 11:47 AM
Granted, but perfectly clean gets taken to extremes and all your furniture is gone too.

I wish that I'll do well on my psych test on Tuesday.

09-27-2011, 12:06 PM
Granted, but you fail all the rest of the tests and the final exam..."F"
(I'm sure you'll do great on Tuesday though):D

I wish I had more energy today.

10-06-2011, 04:45 PM
granted but its energy wattage for your lightbulbs

i wish i had a pefect size 10 figure

10-07-2011, 11:45 AM
Granted, but all the weight went to your feet. Now you can't move.

I wish I had a a new transmission for my car.

10-12-2011, 08:36 AM
Granted, but it is sitting in your driveway and you are going to have to install it yourself.

I wish my sick son at college had some of my homemade chicken soup.

10-12-2011, 06:36 PM
but he is not really sick he is skippimg classes today

My neighbor mowed my lawn without asking

10-12-2011, 10:17 PM
granted, but he also mowed your garden and chopped down your trees.

I wish I had a new dishwasher.

10-13-2011, 03:51 PM
Granted, but you bought the new dishwasher because the old one leaked all over the kitchen and ruined the floor, which now has to be replaced.

I wish I didn't have to give this speech today.

10-13-2011, 04:04 PM
Granted, but you bought the new dishwasher because the old one leaked all over the kitchen and ruined the floor, which now has to be replaced.

I wish I didn't have to give this speech today.

Granted, but now you cannot speak ever again.

I wish my family could all get along.

10-13-2011, 09:52 PM
Granted, but you must all live together in a 2 room house without air conditioning in the middle of the mohave desert and hold hands while singing Cumbayah together 2 hours every night.

I wish I had a personal chef.

10-14-2011, 05:09 AM
Granted, but he cooks liver and onions for every single meal.

I wish my brother's dog would hurry up and be potty-trained!

10-14-2011, 09:14 AM
Granted, but the dog gets loose and runs away and you never see it again.

I wish I could go on vacation

10-25-2011, 08:18 PM
Granted, but it rains the whole time.

I wish I will pass my exam on Thursday.

10-25-2011, 10:04 PM
Granted. You don't just pass you get a 100.
But because the rest of the class flunked, no one will talk
to you anymore (and the teacher things you cheated)

I wish my husband would stop snoring!

10-30-2011, 10:12 PM
Granted... but now he has uncontrollable flatulence all night long!

I wish my husband would clean the bathroom.

10-30-2011, 10:31 PM
Granted but he only cleaned it 'cause all his buddies were coming over and they completely trashed your house.

I wish I could eat my weight in Chinese food without ever gaining a pound

10-31-2011, 12:24 AM
Granted. You didn't gain a pound! You gained 20!!

I wish that we make $500 in our garage sale next weekend!

11-06-2011, 04:50 PM
Granted, but they bought the whole garage for $500 and took it away. Now you have to park outside.

I wish I had new carpeting.

11-08-2011, 01:59 PM
Granted, but your new carpeting is on Change4Life's driveway and has a car parked on it.

I wish my Christmas shopping was done.

11-13-2011, 01:53 PM
Granted, but the mpg on your car would decrease as well.

I wish that it was November 21st already!

11-21-2011, 11:17 AM
Granted!:D It's November 21st today!

I wish I had a spare bedroom for my Holiday guests.

11-30-2011, 10:17 PM
Granted but they brought three large dogs with them and stayed 4 months

I wish I had a new car..

12-06-2011, 08:57 PM
Granted, but its alternator dies two miles away from the dealership.

I wish that I'll do well on my finals next week.

12-07-2011, 04:12 AM
Granted. But there was someone who passed a copy of the test around prior to the Finals. Teacher found out. Now you have 15 page Term Paper due in 2 days instead.

I wish my house was completely decorated for Christmas.

12-08-2011, 02:49 PM
Very creative corruption there! 0o That would SUCK.

Granted, but a single Christmas light burns out, causing the whole chain to go and you can't figure out which one it is.

I wish Thursdays moved faster.

12-16-2011, 02:29 PM
Thursday is over and done with! But just as quickly as it went away, it took Friday, Saturday, and Sunday with it, bringing you a slowly-creeping MONDAY!
(I :love: Monday's) :lol:

I wish the holidays had come at any other time than the present. I am SO stinking close to ridding myself of this dang plateau!

02-27-2012, 10:40 AM
Granted now they come every Thursday

I wish I had more income

02-27-2012, 12:55 PM
I wish I had more income

POOF! Granted...
But now your car breaks down and you need a new one.
So much for the "more income"!

I wish it would snow just once this winter (or Spring!)

04-02-2012, 09:18 AM
Granted! But it was the biggest snowstorm of the season and now you can't leave your house for weeks until the thaw...

I wish I had a sailboat.

04-02-2012, 05:24 PM
Granted. But it's so big the police won't allow you to transport it on the roads and so has to stay on your driveway.

I wish I wasn't so pale and freckly!

04-02-2012, 11:03 PM
Granted. But the spray on tan is permanent and you are tinted orange.

I wish got the job I want as a College Professor.

04-03-2012, 12:52 AM
Granted but it's for a prison college program and you have to live "on campus" during the weekdays.

I wish I owned a house on the beach in Malibu...

04-03-2012, 02:33 PM

Here is your new house on the beach at Malibou...

Well, you never said what size!!

I wish my taxes were done, and there was a HUGE refund check on the way!

04-03-2012, 03:42 PM
Granted... the check is HUGE...actually 3 feet by 8 feet , but it is only for $1.00

I wish my paperwork was organized and filed.

04-03-2012, 03:58 PM
Granted, paperwork has been shredded neatly and placed in file 13.

I wish I had a Porsche.

04-03-2012, 10:49 PM
Granted, a banged up Porsche is being delivered from your local junkyard.

I wish I could live my life over beginning at 16.

04-03-2012, 10:53 PM
Granted but it's 16 in dog years so you are now 112.

I wish I had become a marine biologist.

04-03-2012, 11:00 PM
Granted, but you get laid off and get evicted. (uggh, sorry, it's on my mind).

I wish that mini-pie I wanted hadn't been 350 calories.

04-04-2012, 11:59 PM
Granted, it is 3,500 calories.

I wish that I never had to work again.

04-05-2012, 12:24 AM
Granted, you got fired and permanently blackballed from all future employment by your last employer.

I wish my teenage kids could figure out how to replace the toilet paper.

04-05-2012, 10:22 AM
Granted, but they did with the pink perfumed kind that grandma used to use and everyone knows that stuff sticks to everything!

I wish I had a personal trainer.

04-05-2012, 05:12 PM
Granted, but he is personally training you on washing out public toilets.

I wish I was at the Tiger's opening game today.

04-05-2012, 07:12 PM
Granted, but you are sitting in the stands naked.

I wish I could run super fast.

04-05-2012, 08:29 PM
Granted, but you needed bionic legs to do so and during your first run there was a huge downpour and they rusted up so you can't use them anymore.

I wish the housework could do itself.

04-06-2012, 02:57 PM
Granted but the housework decided to evict you for not doing a good enough job.

I wish it was warmer today.

04-09-2012, 08:51 AM
Granted. You find yourself in the middle of the Sahara with nary an oasis in sight.

I wish I didn't have to go to school (to work) today.

04-10-2012, 09:59 AM
Granted, you no longer have to work Mondays, but you have to work every Saturday and Sunday.

I wish my daughter wasn't looking at colleges 1000 miles from home.

04-10-2012, 08:19 PM
Granted, she has decided to live at home for the rest of her life rent free and job free.

I wish I had a new bike.

04-21-2012, 09:11 PM
Granted, it's a top of the line 10" bike for a 3 year old with training wheels included. (You probably won't need the training wheels ;-)

I wish my laundry was done, folded and put away.

04-21-2012, 09:34 PM
Granted your laundry is all done and put away,, To bad you left the red lipstick in your pocket now it's all over everything.

I wish I had a new puppy!!

04-22-2012, 05:38 AM
Granted: But, your puppy is really a 120lb Great Dane that will pee lakes in your house everyday for the next 10 years.

I wish my husband was home from the war.

04-22-2012, 09:48 AM
Wow how can I corrupt that wish. I can't.

04-22-2012, 09:53 AM
Aww, I can't corrupt that one...He surprises you tomorrow morning by kissing you awake! (Maybe you have dragon breath, there, I corrupted it) Thank you for a brave husband!

I wish I knew how to play golf with my son.

04-25-2012, 12:34 AM
You do but hit a golf ball through a 100,000 dollar stained glass window. Wish granted but it may take some time to pay that off. :)

I wish I could lose 100 pounds overnight.

05-07-2012, 12:52 PM
Wish granted but now none of your clothes fit and you have to go shopping wrapped in a sheet!

I wish I had a real espresso machine in the house.

05-08-2012, 01:29 PM
Granted, you get your'e espresso machine only to find out the price of coffee has skyrocketed and is more valauble than copper.

I wish my hubby would let me have a dog.

05-08-2012, 02:04 PM
Wish granted, but that dog won`t stop barking!

I wish I had a brand new car.

06-16-2012, 09:07 AM
Wish Granted, but your brand new car is pictured below

I wish I owned a pet.

Precious Little
06-16-2012, 11:32 PM
Granted but it could be lethal.

(Emperor Scorpion) - can u believe ppl have these as pets OMG!

It's a nice day outside, I wish I wasn't stuck inside doing paperwork Grrrr....!

Rose Centered
07-03-2012, 11:40 PM
Wish granted, but you got a nasty sunburn and can't sleep tonight.

I wish my daughter would move back to the US from Australia. ( (

07-04-2012, 12:29 AM
Granted, but she moves to Anchorage.

I wish I could have a week off.

07-04-2012, 04:05 PM
Granted, but you get life off as you're fired.

I wish I could have an orgasm.

07-04-2012, 04:10 PM
Granted, you develop Persistent Genital Arousal Syndrome and now orgasm at the slightest vibration.

I wish I had more money!

Rose Centered
07-06-2012, 09:05 AM
Granted, but you cannot buy anything new or go on any expensive vacations because your friends and relatives would hover around you constantly asking for help. (At least you could pay off all of your bills and no one would know!)


Rose Elizabeth
07-27-2012, 08:29 PM
Rose Centered- you forgot to make a wish!

I wish my room would stay organized.

Rose Centered
07-27-2012, 08:56 PM
Rose Elizabeth :) - Granted, but living in severe organization stiffles your creativity, and you spend all of your spare time trying to keep things in order rather than going out and having fun.

Now my wish...My daughter and her boyfriend would finally become engaged and set a wedding date. :flow1:

Rose Elizabeth
07-28-2012, 03:13 PM
I feel bad about corrupting this one. It's so sweet! Granted, but the wedding is in Japan and you can't find an airline or a cruise line company to get you there in time!

I wish I had a concert grand piano all to myself.

07-28-2012, 03:17 PM
Granted, it falls on you looney-tunes style.

I wish all my packing and moving was done!

Rose Elizabeth
07-28-2012, 03:20 PM
Granted, but the moving company took your stuff to the wrong place!

I wish I was really good at chess.

08-17-2012, 10:21 AM
But then you develop arthritis, making it difficult to play.

(no pain, no gain :P)

If I had a hammer...

09-29-2012, 12:45 AM
Granted, but it's made of porcelain.

I wish my new shoes were already broken in.

10-23-2012, 01:34 AM
Granted, but you can never take em' off ;-)
I wish I had a ginger cat, like Garfield

10-25-2012, 01:34 AM
Granted, but it's a taxidermied cat. (too dark?)

I wish I never have to wash dishes again.

12-12-2012, 03:31 AM
Granted, but the new dishwasher is some creepy guy who moves into your house, sleeps on your couch, and smells like cheese....

I wish to win the lottery!

12-12-2012, 08:31 AM
Granted, but you lose the ticket before you can claim the prize

I wish my Christmas shopping was done

12-14-2012, 01:15 AM
Granted! But the gifts are all wrong! Wrong size, color, style, game, etc.

I wish I could say what I wanted & not loose my job!

12-15-2012, 09:04 AM
Granted. Now you are the boss, and because of what you say, all your employees quit.

I wish I had a closet for my clothes.

12-16-2012, 02:03 AM
Granted! But it has a monster in it & it likes to grab you & tickle you so badly that you can't breathe!

I wish I could meet & have dinner at a table surrounded by my favorite actors & actresses!

12-23-2012, 02:32 AM
Granted! But they all talk nonstop about themselves and end up in a fight about who is the most talented.

I wish it were spring.

12-25-2012, 06:13 PM
Granted! But now your hayfever is soooo bad, you can't enjoy a moment of it!

I wish I owned a home, free & clear, over-looking the ocean.

12-25-2012, 07:04 PM
Granted, but the ocean is too cold to swim in so you have to mortgage the house to build a swimming pool.

I wish I could move to Greece.

12-27-2012, 01:17 PM
You got it! But with the economic crisis there, you've lost your life savings when your new Greek-owned bank goes kerplunk.

I wish I had pretty fingernails.

12-27-2012, 02:00 PM
Granted! But your all your keratin is redirected to your fingernails to keep them shiny and pretty so all your hair falls out and now you're bald with no eyebrows.

I wish I could hit my goal weight by next month.

01-02-2013, 05:15 AM
You do, but then your metabolism became so low that you would have to live on 500 calories a day for the rest of your life to keep your weight from skyrocketing higher than before... Good luck on that one!!

I wish I could own my own house.

01-02-2013, 09:02 AM
Granted, but it turns out to be the home that inspired the movie The Poltergeist and the spirits are angrier than ever.

I wish my dog was obedient.

01-02-2013, 06:38 PM
Granted! Too bad he only obeys commands he hears on TV.

I wish I could own my own sucessful company.

01-02-2013, 07:04 PM
Poof! Granted! But it's a 1-900 phone sex company and you're the sole owner/operator.

I wanna win the next Powerball lottery!

01-02-2013, 07:34 PM
You win! Unfortunately your accountant runs off with the entire thing right afterward!

I wish my hair was longer.

01-02-2013, 09:33 PM
Granted, but it's the hair in your ears.

I wish I actually enjoyed exercise.

Quiet Ballerina
01-03-2013, 02:28 PM
Granted, but it's the hair in your ears.

I wish I actually enjoyed exercise.

Granted! But the only exercise you enjoy is channel surfing.

I wish my back would stop hurting :(

01-04-2013, 11:06 AM

But now you are so flexible your only option for employment is to join the circus.

I wish... all my wishes could come true.