Weight Loss Support - was feeling good until i tried on jeans :(




bellastarr
05-27-2011, 05:10 PM
so i'm three months and seven days into this latest go of losing weight and i was feeling good, i can tell i'm losing, my waist is definitely smaller so i decided to try on jeans to see where i was. i have every size in my closet so i pulled out my 12's and i could at least pull them up but super tight everywhere and i have a major muffin top in them. i also tried on a pair of 10's i have in my closet that i used to wear easily cuz they had stretch in them and i thought they'd be tight but was hoping to get them on, well i couldn't even get them past my thighs/hips and now i am so depressed. i feel like even though i've made progress i still am nowhere near where i used to be. i am trying hard to say to myself ok, it's been three months since i started at 238.5, i refuse to weigh myself but would guess i've lost 20 or 30... if i can spend all of june, july, august and try them on again in 3 months they should be looser... but really i feel like omg how dumb was i to think i am getting better when i'm still huge? :(

just needed to vent. i feel like i'm losing no inches at all from hip/thigh area :( since i can't even pull them up. when i used to wear them even when they were starting to get tight i could at least pull them on and lay down on the bed and suck my stomach in and zip them :(


theCandEs
05-27-2011, 05:35 PM
Well, it's still happening to me, too. My mom insisted I try on this cute little dress I bought years and years ago. She said it was big on her, so it should fit me. Ugh! Couldn't even zip the stupid thing up! It put me out a little. Anyway, just know that it happens to all of us. We just have to keep on keeping on. We will get there eventually.
Good luck!

DixC Chix
05-27-2011, 05:48 PM
I seem to be changing sizes every 20 lbs or so.

It also depends on how much you tighten up the muscles with exercise.

Instead of going straight for the smaller sizes, try on the 20's and then the 18's and then the 16's. You will be able to gauge your progress without getting bummed out too much.

As a matter of fact go do that now and come back with smiley faces for the sizes that are history!!!


pinkflower
05-27-2011, 06:32 PM
repeat to yourself : I didn't gain this weight in a few months, it's not going to come off in a couple months!

Instead of thinking bad thoughts about yourself (calling yourself dumb), pat yourself on the back for losing the weight so far and coming so far from where you started. You chose to change make healthier choices. Give yourself credit for that

carter
05-27-2011, 06:41 PM
Give it time. Sizes are very frustrating at first because there are a lot more pounds between sizes at the large end than at the small end.

Search this forum for "paper towel theory" for an interesting insight into why that is that might make you feel better.

In my own process, my body didn't seem to change very much at all for the first 40-50 pounds. Only then did I start noticing my clothes getting very loose. Then between around 60-75 pounds gone, it was like a switch flipped. The changes started coming fast. (I also started stepping up my resistance training, which helped.) It started to seem like clothes I bought would be too big on me just a couple weeks later.

Be patient, you're doing great, I promise this will get better.

JOLINA
05-27-2011, 08:00 PM
Hang in there and don't give up.
I have lost 30 pounds and I have just dropped one dress size.
I have lost very little in my waist.
It is coming off my face, arms and legs first.
That might be happening to you too.
:?:

Watch your hands and feet and see if your shoes are getting looser and your hands thinner.
My body is doing its own thing. I have to go with what it has planned for itself. But all the excess fat will come off eventually in my waist and hips.
Just have to be patient. :(

:hug:

Mango683
05-28-2011, 02:47 PM
I feel exactly (EXACTLY!) the same way! It's only been a solid month (plus a week for me) with really watching what I'm eating and working with a personal trainer, so I know nothing should be drastically improved. However, I've been feeling really great and have a noticeable difference in my regular jeans! I decided to pull out my summer clothes from last year, which I always felt were my fat summer clothes, and low and behold, I don't even fit into them. It makes me sooo depressed- for a number of reasons. I can't believe how much I allowed myself to gain over the summer, and also because I may be feeling good, but I'm not even near fitting into clothes that were my staple last year that weren't even all that great anyways. I've got such and incredibly long way to go, and it's making me stay on track and work heard, but I agree, it really just feels like a smack in the (big) gut when you are feeling so accomplished and motivated, and then you get that reality check.

This is why we're all here, and it helps me to know I'm not alone. I'll be hanging in there, and I hope you will, too!

asweetchicagogirl1
05-28-2011, 04:14 PM
Hang in there, I know how frustrating this can be. I hate jean shopping (to the point where I didn't wear jeans for about 3 years). Jeans suck, especially if you are like me and carry all your weight in your thighs, legs, and butt (which is what is sounds like from what you are describing). Focus on the positive (how you feel, the difference you can notice, etc.) and do NOT focus on the size.

When I went jean shopping for the first time in years about a month ago I went to a really high end store, picked the first sales guy I saw, told him not to tell me how the European sizes equated to American sized and just find me a pair of jeans that looked worth the money I was about to spend on them...he did just that and then some even though I now know the size and it is seriously sort of a bummer...seriously, they are a 10 and I'm about the same height as you so you've got to feel my pain on that. Some of us are just built different, KWIM? I will forever have a big butt/thighs (I've been teeny tiny, about 15lbs lower than my current goal, and still had this problem so it ain't going away). Embrace the smaller parts of you as well as the more well-endowed ones. :)

JenniD44
05-29-2011, 02:31 AM
I know how frustrating it can be. The jeans I was wearing when I started the diet were too big in a couple of weeks--won't stay up. However, when I was trying to find things to wear in a smaller size, many were still too tight. Take it one day at a time and you will get there.

Riddy
05-30-2011, 11:55 PM
I'm down 29 pounds, and my pants are falling off my butt! Seriously, I can take them off without unbuttoning them! The stuff that's falling off me are 20's and 22's, but when I went shopping this weekend, most of the 18's and 20's I was trying on were too small. Grrrr! :tantrum: I did finally find 1 pair of capris that fit, and they're size 18.
NSV - first pair of new pants that the size starts with a "1"! :woohoo:

aimeebell
05-31-2011, 09:09 AM
Size 10 is likely the size you will be when you are at your goal weight, so why are you trying them on now and letting yourself get depressed and disappointed? You are estimating your weight to be somewhere around 210 to 220 pounds; that is not a size 10, and trying those jeans on will only make you upset. It takes time. You will get there. You have come a long way.

98DaysOfSummer
05-31-2011, 10:54 AM
That is exactly why I do weigh and measure myself. I can't estimate how much I've lost. I just can't. I know that according to my perceived effort, I would guess too high. Unless I was having a down day, then I would guess too low. Either way, it's just a guess.

I also know how much I weighed last time I was a size 12 and it wasn't in the 200s - it was more like 150. I'm not going to try on 12s for a L O N G time. No use putting myself through that. Right now I wear a 24. If I'm feeling brave, I'll pull out some 22s. But not till my scale says I've lost 10 or 15 pounds, or my 24s look baggy. I just don't want to deal with the disappointment. I'd way WAY rather think about how far I've come instead of how far I have to go.

I've done this weight loss thing before. I'm trying to learn from my mistakes. Most of mistakes didn't come in the form of eating too many carbs or not drinking enough water or some of the teeny details that people fixate on, it came from feelings. I dieted just fine, but sometimes I let my emotions and feelings get the better of me and then I just couldn't recover. Pretty much every re-gain I've ever had didn't come from too much ice cream or fast food, it came from feeling bad about myself in some way and giving up.

Can I ask why you're refusing to weigh yourself? Is that something you decided or did someone else talk you into thinking it's a good thing? I know it's probably the way to go for some people, but if it doesn't work for you as a strategy - you can always abandon it. Or you can get a tape measure and keep track that way. Don't set yourself up to feel bad. A tape measure or scale will show your progress. Clothes that don't fit just show you how far you have left to go. ENJOY your success!

dragonlady1978
05-31-2011, 11:02 AM
I am about your height, and I am in a size 14 at 185 pounds. Expecting to fit into size 10's right now is just unreasonable. I won't even begin to try a 10 until I'm below 160 pounds.

Try not to focus on the number so much. If you are having to squeeze into a pair of jeans by laying down and sucking in, then they don't really fit. Wearing clothes that are too tight only emphasizes unpleasant bulges and rolls that wouldn't be hangin out in clothes that fit properly. When people see you, they can't see the tag in your jeans to know the size. Choose clothes that make you look and feel good, the smaller number on the tag doesn't mean much if you look like you can't breathe in them.

There's nothing wrong with wanting to be smaller, we all do. I just think you are setting yourself up for disappointment by expecting to live up to unrealistic expectations.

xHannahxBux
05-31-2011, 11:13 AM
Don't give up dear, let this stigma motivate you into pushing yourself hard so you will one day soon be able to fit into those 12's or even 10's! We all have our moments of weakness and doubt but get back up on that saddle and keep on going! Good luck!

khat
05-31-2011, 12:15 PM
Argh I do that too. It's really a depressing moment, you are not alone trust me. Just don't give up. I remember I could really see a difference when I got down to 145. Before that I always felt the same when I tried them.. Weird..

uwfan27
06-01-2011, 05:10 PM
I'll vent with you! It's sooooooo frustrating to own a closet full of clothing you can’t fit into. Those cute jeans, the expensive pairs… You can only remember how you looked in them from the old pictures. *sigh* Being stuck wearing a size you never thought you’d be wearing while occasionally taking out the nicer pairs, the smaller pairs… wishing and hoping they just. might. fit. It’s so flipping hard!!! But I just keep going, because I will eventually get there. It WILL happen. I just have to keep reminding myself, just like so many of us; I didn’t gain the weight overnight and it’s not going to come off overnight. But it WILL come off if we just keep working hard!!! And the day I fit back into my skinny jeans will be worth every bit of effort, sweat, frustration, skipped desserts and all the hurdles I’ve encountered along the way.

The day will come!!!

runningfromfat
06-01-2011, 08:44 PM
That is exactly why I do weigh and measure myself. I can't estimate how much I've lost. I just can't. I know that according to my perceived effort, I would guess too high. Unless I was having a down day, then I would guess too low. Either way, it's just a guess.

I also know how much I weighed last time I was a size 12 and it wasn't in the 200s - it was more like 150. I'm not going to try on 12s for a L O N G time. No use putting myself through that. Right now I wear a 24. If I'm feeling brave, I'll pull out some 22s. But not till my scale says I've lost 10 or 15 pounds, or my 24s look baggy. I just don't want to deal with the disappointment. I'd way WAY rather think about how far I've come instead of how far I have to go.

I've done this weight loss thing before. I'm trying to learn from my mistakes. Most of mistakes didn't come in the form of eating too many carbs or not drinking enough water or some of the teeny details that people fixate on, it came from feelings. I dieted just fine, but sometimes I let my emotions and feelings get the better of me and then I just couldn't recover. Pretty much every re-gain I've ever had didn't come from too much ice cream or fast food, it came from feeling bad about myself in some way and giving up.

Can I ask why you're refusing to weigh yourself? Is that something you decided or did someone else talk you into thinking it's a good thing? I know it's probably the way to go for some people, but if it doesn't work for you as a strategy - you can always abandon it. Or you can get a tape measure and keep track that way. Don't set yourself up to feel bad. A tape measure or scale will show your progress. Clothes that don't fit just show you how far you have left to go. ENJOY your success!

:yes: Just to give you a data point, I'm in a size 12 right now and I'm 2 inches taller than you and probably at least 20lbs lighter. It sounds like your setting yourself up for disappointment by using clothes that are just not realistic right now (But will be SOON if you keep up the good work!!!!).

I totally agree with what 98DaysOfSummer said. This is precisely WHY I weigh myself daily AND take my measurements. I get to see my progress first hand even if it is slow, I know it's happening. Going by clothes can be really tricky because they can stretch or you can be bloated the day you try them on. Also, if you're putting on ones that won't be able to fit yet you'll be setting yourself up for disappointment. :(

I'd suggest stepping on that scale or at the very least start taking measurements. It can really, really help to see your progress! ;)

Marmot12
06-02-2011, 09:46 AM
I am the same i bought a load of t-shirts a few sizes smaller than i am and every so often i try them on and then they go back in the closet lol but slowly so slowly there starting to look a bit better each time.

I also bought two pairs of jeans which are 1 size to small for me as motivation to lose weight! so i have to lose weight or i wont be able to wear them in autum/winter lol

So just keep going you will get there!:) and you will be mega proud once they fit!

Kendrab1223
06-03-2011, 03:36 PM
I have totally been where you are! Around 170ish pounds I bought a pair of size 6 old navy (helllllooooo vanity sizing!) capris. I stupidly tried them on (knowing they wouldnt fit). They hardly went half way up my thighs! I'm thigh/booty heavy as it is so even buying those 6's in my mind I was laughing at myself.

A week ago I tried those suckers on again and they freakin fit. Im now doing the same thing with a pair of size 5 hollister skinny jeans (hellloooo non vanity sizing!!!). They go about half way up my butt. I knew trying them on they wouldn't fit but seriously... When youtry those jeans on again after sticking with losing weight, and they fit, you will feel like a million bucks. You don't think it's great now, but when they fit you'll be soooo happy you tried them on at a higher weight because you'll REALLY see the progress!

As fr as being bottom heavy goes... My butt and thighs have been the last to start going but they're going lol. I'll probably always be unproportionate but now it's fine with me.

PacSunMama
06-03-2011, 05:52 PM
Size 10 is likely the size you will be when you are at your goal weight, so why are you trying them on now and letting yourself get depressed and disappointed? You are estimating your weight to be somewhere around 210 to 220 pounds; that is not a size 10, and trying those jeans on will only make you upset. It takes time. You will get there. You have come a long way.

Yes, this exactly! If you think you've lost 20-30 pounds, you're still at about 200. When I'm 200 at 5'7, I can't fit one leg into a pair of size 10's (or 12 or 14 for that matter!,) it's just not realistic.

Why do you refuse to weigh yourself? Maybe if you weigh yourself you'll either be VERY pleasantly surprised and motivated all over again, or maybe you're not making quite as much progress as you think you may be and it will force you to buckle down all over again. Surely you've made some progress, possibly even more than you're guessing at! I say hop on the scale and try your pants on again, starting at the top- what falls off, what fits and what's close? Be kind to yourself, after all this hard work especially, you deserve it!

Serbrider
06-03-2011, 08:02 PM
I'm 5'9.5"... 208 lbs... and I am at 12/14. Every 16 I've tried on has been huge on me. Some 14s are huge on me... while I can barely put some 12s on my legs.

My next pair of goal jeans are a pair of 10s that my mom's cousin was giving away. I'm not expecting to fit in them until the end of the summer (hopefully up to 20-40 lbs down).

Dress-wise... I am a solid size 12... could probably squeeze into several 10s... am a medium on most of them... but not all. And this isn't to where I look like a stuffed sausage... but actually look just fine.

My guess as to why I can fit into these jeans now is because I have longer legs (I need at least a 33 inch inseam... 34-36 are preferable)... other than that... no clue.

Don't rush it. Don't try on a million things that are several sizes smaller than what you wear currently. If you want to try it on... if you have a couple sizes bigger... try those first.

You have made AWESOME progress girl. :) Good luck!

lin43
06-04-2011, 12:28 PM
I've done this weight loss thing before. I'm trying to learn from my mistakes. Most of mistakes didn't come in the form of eating too many carbs or not drinking enough water or some of the teeny details that people fixate on, it came from feelings. I dieted just fine, but sometimes I let my emotions and feelings get the better of me and then I just couldn't recover.

Oh, how very true this is! I think this applies to many of us who have been yo-yo dieters (I know it applies to me). Thank you for posting that.

To the OP, I know just what you mean. I, too, have gained at least 10 (maybe 15) lbs. since last summer, and I wanted to lose, not gain! I have some really pretty skirts in my closet that I would love to be able to get into this summer, but realistically, I know that isn't going to happen. I just won't be able to lose that much weight that fast without going on some diet that I will feel deprived about. I'm trying to decide now what to do, but one thing I can't do is focus on the past. Learn from it but don't focus on it. Bemoaning what you used to be will only set you back, mentally. Think of how far you've come during the past few months and how great you will look in a few months.

mzKiki
06-05-2011, 08:07 PM
Aww, you sure are being hard on yourself. If you lost 20 or 30lbs in 3 mnths you are doing a phenomenal job! I say go try on some pants that fit you kind of tight when you first started.
I lost 20 and only went down 1 size! But hey 18 is still better than 20!!!
And those 20's sure are baggy in the butt lol.

bellastarr
06-05-2011, 08:48 PM
to everyone who asks why i don;t get on the scale it's a big thing for me, i get very upset weighing in because it is never enough. so even if i get on it and see ok i lost 30 i will still mentally be like big deal 30 and still can't get anything on.

i was hoping the 12's would be a little less tight, i really wanted them to fit by the end of school... i tried them on to get a gage of where i was, i hadn't attempted to try them on in 3 months and thought well lets see...

i'm guessing i must be a 14 right now...

i know i am hard on myself but i have to be.... i gained 100 lbs........... i'm so embarrassed and until most of that is gone i really can't be happy with losing 30... i'm trying to tell myself well at least i am making progress but it's hard to know i still have such a far, far way to go

i wouldn't even go out of the house last weekend and had a 4 day weekend for memorial day, because the last time those 12 jeans fit i was too ashamed to be seen and now that they still don't even go on was feeling very bummed

trying to stay calm, thanks for all the replies/encouragement.... just very frustrating when i've done this so many times before and am worried i'm not losing in hips/thighs since i can't pull the jeans up past them. every time they got tight in the past could at least get them past there just couldn't button...

giving it time though :(