100 lb. Club - Pictures ruin my confidence!




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fatferretfanatic
04-10-2011, 03:49 PM
I hate having pictures taken, though I allow it-and I feel sometimes they are necessary, because I love documenting where I've been with them. But, I do not like that I think I look a million times worse in pictures than I think i do in real life! For instance, yesterday my friends, hubby and I went on a good hike a few counties over and had a blast. We took a picture atop the mountain we hiked, and when I saw it tagged on my facebook, I was so dismayed. I looked so fat! These past few weeks, I feel like I have noticed when I look into the mirror how beautiful my face is becoming again. But in pictures, I just look bad. I'm not letting it get in the way of my loss, if anything it's motivation to lose more, but I must have some sort of delusional way of looking at myself that makes me seem better looking than I am when I see myself. Maybe that's why I allowed myself to get this big. Do you guys have these feelings toward photos too?


ilidawn
04-10-2011, 04:00 PM
Absolutely! I got tagged in a group pic and when I saw it my jaw hit the floor because I thought I had lost weight and there I was like a whale with 3 chins! I try to hide now when people bring out cameras. The only person who takes my pics is me lol only because I know how to angle the pic to look thinner and I'll take a bagillion pics and only see a few I like XD

kaebaka
04-10-2011, 04:06 PM
Unfortunately, yes. But it goes both ways. Some pictures, I will look at them and see, "Wow, I've made a lot of progress!"... and then other pictures I look at and I feel like I haven't changed. Although with almost 50 pounds lost, I know that some of the changes are quite visible. :P

It seems like the pictures that I am most excited about- meaning the pictures of me doing physical activities I wouldn't have been able to do 6 months ago - make me look like I'm still at my high weight... But our minds do just play terrible tricks on us.


Ky30
04-10-2011, 04:36 PM
I HATE looking at the OLD pics when I was 285 pounds BUT I do look at them to remind me why Im doing this Im happy with the way I look in pics at this moment but Im sure when I lose another 25 I wont like those either.

ParadiseFalls
04-10-2011, 04:40 PM
I know exactly what you mean. I feel the same way. I have really low self-esteem anyway, but once in a while I'll look in the mirror and think I'm starting to look normal, then I see a picture and it all goes out the window. My friends and I go to dance night at a local bar where they always take tons of pictures and put them up on Facebook, and when I see them I'm always horrified even when I thought I looked kind of cute that night.

It even happens with pictures I take in the mirror! My mom lives in another state, so I've been sending her updates of my weight loss. If I'm going out and wearing something cute that I feel like shows off my weight loss, I'll take a picture, then I look at it and don't even want to send it because I don't think it looks any better at all.

I don't really have any advice for you, but I find myself looking at pictures of myself a lot and getting discouraged by them, which is probably a bad idea.

fatferretfanatic
04-10-2011, 05:12 PM
It's good to know I am not alone in that fact. I mean, pictures are sometimes necessary for life, and I think I'll just have to deal with looking like I do until I lose the weight-but I just wish pictures could express the way we feel that we look just once in awhile while losing weight. ^_^

Nola Celeste
04-10-2011, 06:13 PM
People say that pictures don't lie, but in one sense, they do.

Pictures are a two-dimensional representation of a three-dimensional form. Flash photography especially tends to flatten that three-dimensional form. When you then view the photo, you're perceiving a wider shape than there actually is. I'm sure you've heard that "the camera adds ten pounds," right? Well, if you're already carrying some extra weight, it adds more than that.

Here's a great article in Slate (http://www.slate.com/id/2160377/)that describes the phenomenon.

Another thing to keep in mind is that if YOU feel great and YOU know you look fantastic, then you absolutely do. I know that at my current weight for my height, I'm hardly model-thin--but I feel fantastic, so I suspect that I look lighter to others than my actual weight. An aura of confidence hides little flaws just as surely as a body-shaper or under-eye concealer. :)

Eliana
04-10-2011, 06:41 PM
The first picture is a horrible picture of me. In that picture I felt like a million bucks. I thought I was thin! I'd lost about 15-20 pounds at this point and wondered why people hadn't noticed. My face had thinned out. I saw this picture and was horrified.
http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o166/operaeric/NewcameraDec06004.jpg

But look at this one. My face really HAD thinned out. The picture above was just a bad angle.
http://i120.photobucket.com/albums/o166/operaeric/NewcameraDec06008.jpg

Now I wish I had taken more pictures at my heaviest so I could look back and say, wow. Look at what I did. As it is, I don't have very many "before" pictures, nor do I have many "along the way" pictures. Keep clicking, and use them as motivators! Really! You're doing a wonderful things for yourself. And we are always our harshest critics.

fatferretfanatic
04-10-2011, 07:12 PM
Nola, you are such a sage. I'm feeling a ton better about myself. I do feel like I look a lot better than I did in that photo. I was feeling so confident that day until I saw it, so hopefully nobody noticed that I was down about it. Eliana, it's true-that's what I feel like. I love straight on shots of myself though, for that reason-my profile, even when I was thin was horrible.

vixxi
04-10-2011, 09:56 PM
It's funny that you posted this, like someone else said, I thought I was looking darn good when I left the house! Maybe my perception of myself is off. Last night I went out with my bf and a group of friends, pictures were taken (me thinking I look pretty darn hot) and posted on Facebook. I get kind of mad at my bf for posting such horrible pictures, my face looked all puffed up, i lookede bloated, it was just morritifying and he now all his friends will see how horrible I looked. It really kind of shocked me to see the pictures because I don't feel like thats how I look, in other photos I feel my face looks slim and I look pretty decent. I don't know, maybe it was a bad night, but it sure stinks to see pictures and think "I look like THAT!!"

Trazey34
04-10-2011, 10:40 PM
I'm a ham, I love having my pic taken. It's awesome now to look thru them, the common thread is i usually have mouth wide open because i'm howling laughing at something or other LOL but it's fun to see them side by side and think WOW where' the rest of my face go??

runningfromfat
04-10-2011, 11:19 PM
Generally, I hate having pictures taken of myself. I'm almost to the point where I'm sort-of ok with it, if I can control the pictures but that's about it. ;)

However, the most depressing think in the world is if you see a picture where you're sitting down!!!!! Speaking of which I do HIIT on the bike at the gym and there are mirrors surrounding me. I carry most of my weigh in my belly at the moment and looking at myself sitting on that bike is a pretty scary thing!!! However, it's also great motivation to really push myself. ;)

Theyda
04-11-2011, 05:25 AM
I hate pictures of me but I know I'll appreciate them when I get to my goal weight, for now I'll just keep untagging on facebook!:D

Riesz
04-11-2011, 09:49 AM
I've always despised pictures being taken of myself. I do agree that as I've gained weight pictures seem more and more distorted. When I was slimmer, I would tend to look 10-15 lbs heavier in photos but now it seems to be more like 20-30. :(

I don't know much about photography and lighting but I look better or worse depending on the camera, usually. Funny enough, my webcam generally takes some of the truest, most flattering pictures, I suppose because the camera is in a fixed position and I can watch the picture on the screen so I know how far back and how to pose to actually look how I'd look in a mirror. :)

djs06
04-11-2011, 11:41 AM
OMG I feel your pain. I don't look that bad in my head... until I see a picture of myself. I'm totally vain too, and I blocked people from seeing the photos I'm tagged in on facebook. :lol:

I am also just terribly unphotogenic, so I suspect I would even hate pictures of myself if I were half my size. Oh well!

I would encourage you to take your own pics though, to remind yourself periodically how far you've come. :)

fatferretfanatic
04-11-2011, 12:01 PM
Yes, true-I am glad that the photo was taken. My mom saw them and told me I was looking stronger and smaller-though I think I look like a cow, she saw that I had lost. :D I am just going to decide to be Ok with it because that's all I can do.

kaebaka
04-11-2011, 01:01 PM
However, the most depressing think in the world is if you see a picture where you're sitting down!!!!!

So so sadly true. I have a pic from about 2 years ago where I was sitting down next to the Indian Ocean, and I thought I looked great at the time. I look at the pic now and it is one of the worst that was ever taken of me. However, 2 months ago when I was in Colorado with some friends, one of them took a picture of me sitting down in a very similar pose and I looked.... fine. Now that DOES make me feel better. :)

nickyj
04-11-2011, 01:44 PM
I feel the same. I just had some pictures taken last saturday at a family function, and I felt like I looked the same as I did at 210. But everyone said that I looked so thin, and honestly I couldnt tell. I think we have this image in our head of what we should look like, that it sometiems blinds the actuality of what we did look like, or what we look like currently, and it throws us out of whack.

Arabella
04-11-2011, 01:59 PM
Pictures and dressing rooms are my nasty nudge to face reality.

When I look at myself in a mirror, I always pose so it's the most flattering. And I'm never standing next to a thin person, which also makes a difference. Truth is, though, I can't pose all day, every day and thin people do stand close to me sometimes. Other people see me from all angles and see me standing next to people who aren't overweight.

I'm the only one that's ever shocked by how I look in pictures because everyone else has already seen it. I came to the conclusion that the only person I've ever been fooling is myself. Sad but true.

Dressing rooms? Ugh. Up close and personal in my underwear, there's no way to hide it, even in a mirror.

It's ridiculous how I sort-of "forget" how overweight I am and feel like I'm sort-of okay. I think I need the shock of a picture or the dressing room to remind me that I really need to do this.

JohnP
04-11-2011, 02:19 PM
Great topic! Funny how so many of us feel the same way.

When I had gone from 300 to 260 I was feeling like a champion. We went camping with friends and they are the kind that love to take pictures. Oh my ... I was not looking so wonderful. :D

Goddess Jessica
04-11-2011, 03:15 PM
I LOOOOOVE having my picture taken.
.... as long as I'm the editor! :)

This is why I am the queen of the self-portrait. I know exactly how to angle my face, tilt my chin and smile to make myself look amazing. Catch me off guard? I'm smack you.

Two weeks ago I went to a campaign event for a friend of my running for office. They had a professional photographer who stopped people and had them get together for portraits. Excellent. Stop. Pose. Tilt. Smile (or smEYES, as Tyra Banks would say). The photographer just gushed about how photogenic I was. Oh, thank you.

What I didn't know??? They had another photographer taking CANDID shots. Oh here's me talking! Or eating! Or sitting down!!!! NOOOOoooooo. Like 12 shots showed up tagged in my Facebook. ARGH.

So even those of us who love having our picture taken are still subject to feeling TERRIBLE about pictures.

MEH1969
04-11-2011, 04:50 PM
It's so hard. I don't feel like I'm 261 lbs, but I certainly look it when I see myself in pictures. I look in the mirror and I have some special contacts in or something that makes me see myself at maybe 200lbs.

Arctic Mama
04-12-2011, 12:02 AM
Haha! This is SO me! I both love and hate pictures. These days I am glad for them, because I look much better than I used to. I'm also glad for my old unflattering pictures for the same reason - it is such a big contrast! But some of it is the camera, or bad angles... A lot is the width of my butt! There's just no way around it. I don't let it impact my self confidence, though, because quite honestly I am beautiful even at a high weight. And my personality and actions are what makes the people around me love me. They know I am fat, there's no hiding it, but it's all so much periphery. Fat or skinny, my kids love me the same.

I focus on the good and take the bad for motivation to do better.

I LOOOOOVE having my picture taken.
.... as long as I'm the editor! :)

This is why I am the queen of the self-portrait. I know exactly how to angle my face, tilt my chin and smile to make myself look amazing. Catch me off guard? I'm smack you.

Two weeks ago I went to a campaign event for a friend of my running for office. They had a professional photographer who stopped people and had them get together for portraits. Excellent. Stop. Pose. Tilt. Smile (or smEYES, as Tyra Banks would say). The photographer just gushed about how photogenic I was. Oh, thank you.

What I didn't know??? They had another photographer taking CANDID shots. Oh here's me talking! Or eating! Or sitting down!!!! NOOOOoooooo. Like 12 shots showed up tagged in my Facebook. ARGH.

So even those of us who love having our picture taken are still subject to feeling TERRIBLE about pictures.

Josie83
04-25-2011, 01:22 PM
I have the very same issue and at times I have wondered whether it was something psychological too, or if anyone else seemed to notice the discrepancy. When I take my own photos through my webcam or digital camera, I seem to look to myself more similar to how I see myself when I look in the mirror, with my face making more of a heart shape and my eyes seeming big and bright.

When other people take photos of me with a camera, my eyes seem squinty and my face looks big and square, as well as my body looking way wider than I thought it did. To me, the two versions look so different that I'm not sure which one is the way I really look most of the time. I'd feel really down when someone would remark that I looked good in a photo that looked really horrible to me, because that's not what I want to look like or how I want to be remembered. I always (to me) look like someone that doesn't want to be there. :(

Someone I knew in person asked me if I doctored my own photos, but I don't and I'm not intentionally trying to make myself look thinner than I am as a means to deceive anyone, so I don't really get it. Maybe it's the lighting and the fact that by myself in front of my cam, I feel much more comfortable and expressive, rather than in public where I'm thinking about how fat I'm going to look in the picture? lol

Taking my measurements and weighing myself doesn't phase me too much because its all just numbers and feels impersonal, but if I dwell on my photos too much, I get depressed and ashamed of myself; so when I take progress photos, I'll have a glance and quickly file it away, because I don't want to be too embarrassed to go outside.

bitetoobreakkskin
04-25-2011, 01:59 PM
i didnt read the responses (yet), but i was just thinking this! yesterday for easter i took some pictures with my husband and daughter (her first easter) annnnd looked at how i DONT have a chin/neck (when i doooo)? looked weird in the pictures. i was in the bathroom here at work washing my hands, looked in the mirror and couldnt help but think-why doesnt the picture look like this??? ugh. its really annoying :)

SugarRomeoTango4852
04-25-2011, 02:05 PM
I feel the same way it feels most people on here feel about pictures. I will get dressed nice, think I look great and them BAM someone takes a photo and all of the good feelings are shot. It is 20x worse when there is someone smaller in the photo with me. Then I just feel like a gigantic ugly blob. In the past (shamefully) I have combated this by making sure there is always someone heavier in the photos with me (i have lots of heavy friends) so I look better by comparison.

I am jealous of anyone who is good at self portraits. I try and they look horrible or I just completely miss.

I combat this horrible feeling by just accepting it, strange as it sounds. If I look that horrible in the photo, I probably look that way in life and the only thing I can do is lose weight.

nickyj
04-25-2011, 02:37 PM
O my gosh I feel this way too. I want to post my progress pics, but I feel like I havent made any visible progress, so theres no point.

caryesings
04-25-2011, 03:44 PM
Yes. I hated seeing pictures or catching unplanned reflections of myself on the way down. I was FEELING so much fitter that it just killed me to see the same fat rolls on the body. It was particularly discouraging when I left the smallest plus sizes and started buying "normal" size clothing. My mental attitude was "woo hoo" as I entered dressing room with my size 18 clothes and pretty "boo hoo" on the way out even when sometimes I found the 18s too big.

Even now sometimes pictures can really give me a reality check. Yesterday I was on a long bike ride to celebrate the Easter holiday. Many pictures were taken. Loved the ones where you can see my face and smile, but most of the pictures were of my back and butt while I was biking ahead of the beau on the trail. NOT flattering. I now know where those extra 20 lbs are.

doinit200
04-25-2011, 06:30 PM
My sense of self is completely distorted. Sometimes I see pics of my old self and I just love my cute round face other times I'm horrified by how fat I look. Current pics throw me for an even bigger loop. I feel great, wearing smaller clothing, getting compliments and I see the pic and I feel whalish. I don't know how to dress myself, I don't understand when I look good. My self esteem is out of whack. I figure once I have maintained for a while I will be able to get a better sense of reality but who knows. Great show 'How to Look Good Naked' BBC version address peoples misconception of themselves all the time. If you haven't seen it you should take a look.

fatferretfanatic
04-25-2011, 06:57 PM
Good news! My friend Jonathan took a picture of me, and though it wasn't the hottest picture ever, it was better. I'm definitely making progress and with that, I am satisfied