Weight Loss Support - When is enough enough?

View Full Version : When is enough enough?

03-28-2011, 10:58 AM
For the past few weeks I have been obsessed with my new found bones --- hips, ribs, femur, shoulder. But now that I am almost 10 pounds from goal (which I lowered from 144 a few weeks ago), I am obsessing about what fat is left – abdomen, inner thighs, outer thighs, back of arms, front of arm pit! I can easily grab a fist full in many areas and now I’m thinking I need to lower my goal since it’s obvious I have way more than 10 pounds of fat left on me. And this concept is frustrating me. At 139 I would still be considered overweight according to all the BMI charts I have used but getting down to 132 would put me at the highest end of the normal range. Right now I would be happy at 139 but what’s going to happen when I get there? Am I going to tell myself it's ok that after all this hard work of losing 45 pounds I’m still going to be in the overweight category? I'm not sure if that would be "ok" with me!

I know, I know. I just need to let go and be happy that I am out of the obese category and ultimately end on the low end of overweight. Right?

I know this sounds ridiculous but when I play these weight goal games in my head, it keeps me motiviated to work just as hard today as I have been the past few months. I'm afraid when I get closer to goal, I'll slow down.

03-28-2011, 11:07 AM
I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting to get out of the "overweight" category and into the "normal" category. But I'd give yourself a limit. For me, because of my height, I will not allow my calories to get below 1200, and my weight below 128 (I wouldnt mind hitting 129... Just once). Just like people on here set a "no higher than this", a "no lower than this" should also be in order. :) just set realistic goals, stay HEALTHY, and have fun. :)

03-28-2011, 11:23 AM
I know, I know. I just need to let go and be happy that I am out of the obese category and ultimately end on the low end of overweight. Right?

Yes, you should be happy to be out of the obese category, but that doesn't mean you should be satisfied with being overweight. You have worked too hard to stop at overweight, get healthy.

03-28-2011, 12:28 PM
Just focus on the goal you have now and see how you feel when you get there. If you wanna drop your goal when you get there then do it if not then don't. You sound like you aren't sure where you want to end up right now and you sound like you would be content with 139 but you are getting wrapped up in what the BMI says. It's how you look and how you feel that is important and especially if you've been doing a lot of strength training you could look very nice and healthy and be in great shape but still be in the overweight category. If you are concerned about health issues your hip-to-waist ratio is far more important.

03-28-2011, 12:34 PM
I always encourage folks to think of goals in terms more than just numbers like weight or bmi or body fat %.

Agility, strength, confidence, endurance...these types of things make a real impact on your quality of life and are great things to focus on that arent so weight oriented :)

03-28-2011, 01:11 PM
Well, I've been at goal for three years and I'm still happily obsessed with the way my bones stick out. I think that's pretty normal and it help keeps me on my food plan longterm. My hip bones are awesome. :)

I'm a bigger fan than most of the BMI, but you do need to remember that your weight is effected by the amount of extra skin you have after losing a large amount of weight. Some of what you're grabbing may not be fat so much as it is places where you will have some extra skin. Extra skin has weight you can't do much about without surgery. Some will snap back over time, some will not.

It's also important to remember that your body may not be the perfect one you have always pictured in your mind. If you've got big hips in relation to the rest of your body, then losing weight may make them smaller, but they may still be large in relation to your bust or waist. Even skinny people have body issues about this stuff and we're not exempt from it.

I personally would not stop losing weight until I had a normal BMI. Aside from the health benefits of being at a healthy weight, a mention of an overweight BMI on your medical records can effect your medical insurance rates, your ability to get life insurance and its rates, and any number of other things that I know I don't want to have to deal with after all this hard work.

03-28-2011, 01:51 PM
As you saw and commented on in my post, I reached normal BMI (135) and from there I lowered in 5 pound increments. My initial goal was actually 140, because I never thoughts I would make it there. Imagine my surprise when calorie counting worked! :)

One of the things the 5 pound method has allowed me to do is to get used to my body at each stage. And things change quickly, the lower you get. Have you heard of the "Paper Towel Effect"? The idea is that, the fewer pounds you have to lose, the easier it is to see even a small weight loss. I've definitely found that to be true.

For myself, I tried a bunch of stuff and decided that I wasn't happy eating fewer than 1300 calories a day on a regular basis (once or twice a week is fine, but I aim for a higher average). So my weight loss has been slower since I settled on that, but I didn't want to do anything unsustainable. I think that's pretty key.

Do what you feel comfortable with. But be aware, even at your lowest weight, there WILL be parts of your body you don't like. Body acceptance has been a big part of this for me. I now wear size 4 jeans and still feel fat some days. I think that might just be a part of being an American woman in the 21st century. :(

03-28-2011, 05:05 PM
i do not think that wanting to lower your goal is crazy, AS LONG AS YOU ARE HEALTHY about it. it is alll about health and being sustainable. This is about long-term as well as just hitting the number.

03-28-2011, 05:34 PM
I totally can relate to being obsessed about- but why not get there before you worry more about it. Thats what I've decided to do!

03-28-2011, 05:39 PM
I can understand your concerns. Getting out of these unhealthy categories on the BMI chart are milestones for a lot of people. They're part of my goals too.

I cannot say what weight you should end at. But do consider that the areas you're hating right now could possibly be excess skin (or some fat and some excess skin).

Are there other ways you can assess your health to make sure you really are healthy? How about...
-A full lipid panel at your doctor's office
-Check your cardiovascular endurance
-Body composition test (something that can tell you what % fat, muscle, etc you have) -- this will be much more specific

I hope these ideas help. I totally get that you want to be out of the overweight BMI category -- I feel the same way about myself. But unless you still feel really unhealthy or something, I would try assessing your health in a variety of ways, so that you can at least have some context for your BMI. And, as you already know, BMI is not totally accurate.

Only other thing I can think of is maybe you're being too hard on yourself. Even thin or normal weight women don't like parts of their body and think of different places as pudgy. You might never be 100% excited about how you look because we all are very critical of ourselves. So, my last suggestion is to work on self-acceptance :)

Good luck and I hope you feel better!

03-28-2011, 05:48 PM
You guys are right….as usual. :) I just needed some perspective and I was just having one of those days. I know a lot of these feelings have to do with not knowing what to do with myself when I do get to goal. And then worry if I am going to lose my momentum.

I am going out tonight for a pick me up. Today is my night off from the gym so I think a new work out outfit is in order. My mom asked me last night what keeps me so motivated to get to the gym. I told her I had a lot of cute workout clothes that I love wearing. Sad but true….. ;) I never thought I'd become one of "them". Haha!