100 lb. Club - I want to be DONE WITH THIS already!!!




Lyn2007
02-05-2011, 11:39 AM
Anyone else been on the weight-loss truck for a long, long time??

I mean, yeah, lots of us have sporadically "tried" all our lives, but how long is your latest sustained effort? I have been blogging and working at weight loss for three and a half years now. I have periods of stall, plateau, bits of regain (10-15 pounds) and re-losing. It seems like it is taking FOREVER.

I know the time will pass anyway but lately I just CANNOT STAND it anymore. I have lost over 100 pounds and I just want to get these last 25-30 pounds off and it feels like it is never going to happen! UGH!

Then people tell me "this is forever" and that maintenance is the harder part, and I cannot get my brain around that. It cannot POSSIBLY be harder... can it??

Regardless, I just want to be done with the LOSING part already. I am soooo sick of this! I am using these feelings to fuel my strictness and discipline to stay 100% on plan til I reach my goal (which is NOT 168 pounds that my ticker says... that was a "startup" goal because anything over 110 pounds to lose was too hard to imagine. I would like to reach 140-150 pounds, but I'll know when I get there when to stop, and I am NOT there yet!)


bargoo
02-05-2011, 12:03 PM
103 pounds lost is fantastic. Congratulations !

wfonseca3017
02-05-2011, 12:48 PM
I had just 51 pounds to lose, still trying to. I have been doing this for 2.4 years. Still need to lose 15 to reach my New goal weight ,the only way to do this is keep working on it.

103 is great :)


Vladadog
02-05-2011, 01:34 PM
Sometimes I'm right there with you Lyn. I'm very curious what my body will look like at goal weight. I'm not sure I've ever been a healthy BMI as an adult and I am just sooo curious.

On the otherhand, I know I'm going ot be eating like I'm eating now for the rest of my life so I figure, what's the hurry.

On any given day you can flip a coin for which side of this debate my mood is on....

Dusti
02-05-2011, 02:00 PM
Hang in there. You have done so well losing 103 pounds! What an accomplishment. I understand your frustration because it is a long process but perhaps you could do something to clear your mind for awhile so you don't get stressed over it. I know stress causes me to stall and make bad eating choices. Good luck to you.

Matilda08
02-05-2011, 02:11 PM
Sometimes I feel the same way but I dont think it really ever ends. I think we will still have to work toward maintaning our goal weights . I try not to think of it as much but sometimes it does trigger something in me. YOu are doing a great job!

JustSharing83
02-05-2011, 02:13 PM
I have not been consistent, so it has taken me 4 years to lose the weight I have. I'm hoping I can finally push through and finish it. But yes, it's been a long time coming and I just want it over with as well.

joyfulloser
02-05-2011, 02:20 PM
Sounds like you may just be getting tired of the same ol..same ol. 103 lbs is nothing short of AMAZING...:congrat:

That said, why not try mixing it up a bit. Maybe changing your foods around a little and/or your workout program. It may also be good for your further weight loss efforts!;)

Lyn2007
02-05-2011, 02:24 PM
Thanks guys.

I started by just adding more fruits & veggies and cutting the junk food back. After awhile, I added walking and calorie counting. Then for a bit I did South Beach. Then calorie cycling, calorie banking, "free for all" (did not work out so well!) and taking a break. Then Medifast, then back to calorie counting briefly, then a break, now back to Medifast.

I am just impatient I guess. I am enjoying my plan as much as you can enjoy a plan, but I want my goal body to go with it!!

ubergirl
02-05-2011, 06:17 PM
Oh yes! YES, yes, yes!!!!!!

I started in June 2009, the first fifty came off quick and the second fifty took longer, but the last twenty or so.... SO HARD... and my enthusiasm waxes and wanes. Sometimes I think I'm happy where I am. Sometimes I gain a few and have to go right back. I don't know what my block is, but I often feel I just don't have the energy to lose what is left.

JennieLovesKisses
02-05-2011, 06:28 PM
I know what you mean! I have been on this journey for almost 2 years now and have lost about 155lbs. I am only 5lbs away from the goal I had planed for myself those 2 years back and it is SO frustrating at times when I work so hard and I don't see movement on the scale; granted I am still seeing changes in my body so that does easy the frustrations a bit. I have to keep reminding myself it takes time. I'll get there, just like we all will if we stick with our workout and exercise plans.

kaplods
02-05-2011, 06:58 PM
It's taken me six years to lose 88 lbs. It's by far the largest and longest weight loss accomplishment I've ever had (it's also by far, the slowest. Ironically, I always gave up in the past, for losing too slow - while losing more than I've ever yet lost in this attempt. This time's success has been slower, from the start than my weight loss at the time I abandoned eveyr other weight loss attempt. This is the only weight loss that I've been able commit to for more than 70 lbs or for more than two years. I was always losing fairly rapidly, or gaining fairly rapidly.

In all those previous weight loss attempts, I felt exactly as you do (but I ultimately failed at all those attempts).

I'm not saying the feeling is fatal to your weight loss, but it was fatal to mine.

When weight loss inevitably started feeling that it was "taking forever," and I would "just want it to be over and done," it would eventually escalate to the point that it felt just as bad to see a small weight loss as it did to see a gain. When losing slowly became as painful as gaining, quitting became more and more (and eventually irresistably) tempting. I didn't quit because I was failing, I quit because I felt like my success was no better than failure.

"This time" has been different from the start. The first 20 lbs were accidental. I didn't even own a scale. I learned that I had lost 20 lbs after being prescribed a cpap for sleep apnea. My doctors told me I'd probably lose some weight without trying, but I thought they were nuts.

When I discovered that I'd lost 20 lbs, I decided that even if I couldn't lose another pound (and I didn't think I could) I could maintain the weight loss and "maybe lose one more."

That's been my new strategy in a nutshell. I decided to begin with maintainance. I also decided to make changes that I was willing to commit to whether or not any further weight loss resulted (and for two years, none did, but I did make other health improvements).

Weight loss isn't a behavior, it's a result of behavior. You have 100% direct and complete control over the behaviors, not the results. Focus on the behaviors, and use the results to evaluate your changes, not determine your "success" or failure.

I've never lost slower, or with smaller changes (with a lot of health problems I didn't have the strength, energy, or stamina for large changes), but this has been the easiest, least stressful, most enjoyable way to lose weight ever.

When I start to feel discouraged, I remind myself that I've chosen a low-stress method for a reason. I refuse to let weight loss become so miserable that weight gain seems like the least unpleasant alternative (which is what I did to myself in every other weight loss attempt. Thousands upon thousands of them).

I could lose faster if I accepted more stress. I could have less stress (in the short term) if I gave up completely. I have to strike a balance. For me that means taking one choice at a time. Even one day at a time is often too much for me to handle without getting overwhelmed, so I only make once choice at a time.

I've only been able to lose this much weight (more than I've ever lost before, and by far the longest I've ever kept at it by three fold) by vowing to focus on weight maintenance not weight loss. My focus (and the main source of my feelings of pride and accomplishment) isn't weight loss, it's weight maintenance. My first priority is keeping off the weight and trying to lose one more.

In the past I only saw the goal weight as the success. Everything else was preparation for success. And I never acheived or tasted success. I didn't see the success I was acheiving, I only saw what I had not yet acheived (and it felt like what I had failed to acheive).

It's a mindset difference that has made a huge difference. I'm not waiting for success, I am experiencing it. The "just one more" pound is a goal secondary to keeping off what I've lost, and it means almost every day is full of feelings of success, not failure and not the "waiting room" for success.

Lyn2007
02-05-2011, 08:18 PM
kaplods, that is awesome. Thank you.

I have felt like that *sometimes.* Like, hey, if I can maintain at 178 pounds, I am still SO MUCH better off than I was 100 pounds heavier. That is a success and I am living life as a fairly average sized woman. Awesome.

The catch for me is that I feel a LOT of pressure to lose more because of my knee problem. Dr's, PT's, they all tell me that getting the rest of this weight off is crucial to avoiding total knee replacements relatively soon. I think I get ON myself a lot more because of this. I get mad at myself for "hurting" my knees by not losing the weight faster.

I really need to be more forgiving of myself and applaud what I HAVE done.

twinmommaplusone
02-05-2011, 08:23 PM
Yep I hear ya, especially when I suffer from PCOS and the battle is uphill sometimes.

I get honestly pissed when someone tells me that it's just as hard in maintence cause you know what it maintence you can eat a little bit more,lmao. I'm serious, we have to eat tight when we are trying to lose. Yes I will eat the same after, but guess what I will get to have a little bit more, or maybe something a little bit different. I eat healthy and always will forever now, I LOVE IT~! But, I dont' always love saying to myself...."nope Connie Don't eat those grapes because thats 100 extra calories for you for today, remember you want to lose 2-3 pounds this week" You know, it's hard to be in the lose mode and perhaps it will be hard in the maitenence mode, but I'm ready for it too! Hang in there, we are so close! :hug:

kaplods
02-05-2011, 08:51 PM
kaplods, that is awesome. Thank you.

I have felt like that *sometimes.* Like, hey, if I can maintain at 178 pounds, I am still SO MUCH better off than I was 100 pounds heavier. That is a success and I am living life as a fairly average sized woman. Awesome.

The catch for me is that I feel a LOT of pressure to lose more because of my knee problem. Dr's, PT's, they all tell me that getting the rest of this weight off is crucial to avoiding total knee replacements relatively soon. I think I get ON myself a lot more because of this. I get mad at myself for "hurting" my knees by not losing the weight faster.

I really need to be more forgiving of myself and applaud what I HAVE done.


I can so relate, because I also have those same catches. My biggest issues are fibromyalgia, and an autoimmune disease attacking my respiratory tract, skin and joints (possibly all my connective tissue) and moderately severe osteoarthrtis and possibly mild rheumatoid arthritis. Joint replacement isn't immediately on the horizon, but probably eventually if I can't get the weight off in the next five years. It does add extra pressure, but unfortunately extra pressure doesn't make me more successful.

In the past year, I've discovered that relatively low-carb eating actually has put my autoimmune disease into an apparent or at least partial-remission. I've had no severe flares since drastically cutting carbs and virtually eliminating wheat (In many autoimmune books, I'd encountered the theory that grains and carbs can aggravate AI disease, but I was still very surprised to see such dramatic changes myself).

I don't have AI celiac disease, but even small amounts of wheat, or large amounts of sugar will bring on AI symptoms (so far, just the skin issues, thankfully, but when I see the skin rashes, I get scared and am more careful with my diet).

It's more than insane that I need to see a face breakout to remind myself that high-carb eating could kill me, but long-term consequences are just naturally harder to deeply comprehend than immediate ones.

Unfortunately though I've found that the self-recriminations and guilt don't help me dig myself out of the hole I've gotten into, they only seem to encourage me to dig deeper or become immobilized from hopelessness.

For me, I had to stop aiming at a weight loss that would end with my getting to eat more at the end of it. Instead, I chose a calorie level that I will lose weight into. My calorie level averages around 2000 calories. This may end up my maintenance calories, or I may find that when I stop losing, I will have to decrease my maintenance calorie level. I'd rather do this, than lose at a much lower calorie level and then hope to be able to (and then have to learn) a new calorie level.

This is also a new technique for me. I'd always diet at 1200 to 1500 calories (or less) in the past, taking for granted that I'd get to eat more at maintenance. Then when my weight loss would stall, I'd panic and think that I was going to have to cut my calories under 1000 calories to get to my goal weight. The prospect of cutting calories even further (when I was already feeling hungry 24/7) would send me into a tailspin of hopelessness.

It's possible that I'll be able to increase calories at maintenance weight, but I'm not aiming for that. I also still have a lot of other changes to make, as the better my health gets, the more I'm able to do. The more calories I can burn to lose weight.

For me, with the fibro and autoimmune disease especially using my health as a motivator is a double edged sword. Any drastic change, even those I have no control over like weather send me into a flare of the fibro. If I try to make any change too drastically, I end up with a flare of the fibro and/or AI disease (probably because drastic change, even positive changes, can release stress hormones that aggravate fibro and AI disease, and other health issues too, even insulin resistance, which I also have).

So ironically, while I feel I should be motivated to do more, faster, when I try I end up with a severe flare of symptoms that set me back.

I often feel like I take two steps forward, and one step back (of course it's a dramatic improvement over when I took one step forward, and two steps back).

Taking two steps forward, and one step back - I will eventually get to goal. The other way, I'll just get further and further away.

It's interesting how I've almost had to learn to diet "backwards" from the way I was taught in order to succeed. When I try to lose weight, I end up gaining. When I focus on making healthy changes, the weight loss has been a happy side effect. Just one of the rewards (aside from other health improvements).

kuchick
02-05-2011, 09:30 PM
I'm so ready to be done, too. It's difficult to live your life in constant change. I can live this life forever for maintenance. I love the food I prepare - I just have to keep measuring and limiting servings. What I have a problem with is only buying clothes with an eye to what is going to fit at goal; exercising with an eye to what is going to help me lose weight not just what will keep me healthy; constantly changing my routines to keep my body guessing - it's stressful. I want to finish the C25K and rejoice in what I have accomplished - instead I'll have to think "Now my body is used to this - I won't lose any more weight this way - now what?" I'm just tired of temporary clothes and temporary exercise for my temporary body.

calluna
02-06-2011, 01:57 AM
Truth be known, I have had to find something else to focus on for a little while that will still help with the weight loss. I'm training for a sprint triathlon. It's something of a relief - i still track food and such, but my focus is a bit different.

I understand! Hope my escapism works for me.

Arctic Mama
02-06-2011, 03:13 AM
I've only tried losing this one go around, and its been 2.5 years or so of slow progress. The length isn't bothering me much, because quite frankly I can't get mad about slow progress when I keep not sticking like glue to my plan? I get out what I've put in, and I've put in about 70% effort, thus my losses have been solid enough, but not particularly quick. A year off for pregnancy didn't help either :lol:

I'll get there, but if I want to do it with any speed I need to buckle down and stick to my plan. Since I haven't been choosing to do that, I don't get speedy results.

Lyn2007
02-06-2011, 01:49 PM
Agreed, Arctic Mama. I keep going off plan and that is why I haven't been losing. Proof: I stayed on plan all week this week and dropped 5 pounds. Huh.

5 more and I'll be back at my ticker weight.

Sea
02-06-2011, 04:28 PM
Though I've had slips, I've been basically on plan for 6 months now. It is getting a bit old, but I am trying to safely change things up a little bit now and then. This week's change up is to include seeds, for the mufa benefit. I count calories, and will include them in my count, but I suspect that the occasional change up helps me fight the frustration, boredom, and stalls. I have upped my calorie count some as it really was too low for health at the start. That low start helped me get some momentum going.

pamatga
02-06-2011, 04:39 PM
Lyn, you said what I was just telling my husband earlier today. I joined this site back in 2007. I spent the next 18 months living and breathing this site. I got so familiar with a lot of your struggles here and I hope that I provided encouragement as you were going through all that you were going through. Then, I lost my Mom to cancer in late 2008, and yes, you all were there for me, and then I sunk into a depression, understandably. Then, my husband lost his job and then five months later I lost my job. Somewhere in the midst of all that whatever strides I had made I lost them.

Now, I got a computer again, thanks to the kindness of someone my husband knows, and I can post regularly but guess what? .......all of you who I remember by all your wonderful names I can't find anymore, there are a whole new bunch of people on here and I feel lost. I seriously got bummed out about that. Did everyone else lose weight and no longer need us or did you give up? Well, I don't know but I have returned with the reminder that "you can't step into the same river twice" so here I am, still pudsing along, working on the weight I need to lose. Each new year I tell myself this is going to be it and well it hasn't worked out that way...yet.

So, Lyn, you are a lot farther along than I am and I am feeling hopeful today so please try to keep fightin the good fight. You've come too far to give up!

So, for all of you new people on here, I am one of those who started something a few years and I am back. I want to say I'm here, I want to get healthy by losing weight and although I feel like I am a stranger in a familiar place, I hope to get to know some of you newbies as well.

This is one place where being called a "Loser" is a compliment. Yes, remember that!

Lyn2007
02-06-2011, 06:13 PM
..all of you who I remember by all your wonderful names I can't find anymore, there are a whole new bunch of people on here and I feel lost. I seriously got bummed out about that. Did everyone else lose weight and no longer need us or did you give up?



Welcome back!! I am so sorry to hear about your losses and struggles and I do hope things start looking up for you soon. Yes, people have come and gone, a LOT. Some lost a lot of weight, some regained, some quit before getting there. It is interesting and sad to see the ebbs and flows here as well as in the blogosphere as my blogger friends disappear and delete their blogs. Who knows what happened to everyone? Makes me sad too.

But you will see some old familiar faces here! Some still fighting the battle, some are maintaining. It's one big happy family :)

GirlyGirlSebas
02-06-2011, 08:28 PM
Did everyone else lose weight and no longer need us or did you give up? I understand that. Totally! I really miss some of our friends that never show up around here anymore. I feel like we make a bond, then....poof! They are gone.

Glory87
02-07-2011, 01:41 AM
6 years. Most times, it's pretty easy because I am rigidly on plan during the week (I plan my meals and then I eat that food, no biggie).

I've had a creep since the holidays and usually I can get back on track and lose the weight pretty quickly. I've been a whiny pouty footstomping baby about it this time. Just so tired of my weight, worrying about my weight, planning my food, yadda yadda.

I'm sure this will pass - but, the answer to your question is forever, if you want to keep the weight off. Whenever I relax, I gain weight. If I don't get right on top of it and lose the weight right away, it's a serious chore. The rewards are great, but it is a lifelong endless project that sometimes makes me feel very tired of THINKING about it all the time.

Lyn2007
02-07-2011, 06:57 PM
I'm sure this will pass - but, the answer to your question is forever, if you want to keep the weight off. Whenever I relax, I gain weight. If I don't get right on top of it and lose the weight right away, it's a serious chore. The rewards are great, but it is a lifelong endless project that sometimes makes me feel very tired of THINKING about it all the time.

Is it any wonder that soooo many people regain the weight? Maybe after awhile it feels like it's just not worth it. Like it would be easier to be fat and eat whatever you want.

But then I'd be immobile with my knee issues, and probably die a lot younger, so I guess I will have to keep doing this.

Trazey34
02-08-2011, 10:35 AM
I completely hear ya!!! Sometimes I catch myself thinking "WOW when can i go back to normal" LOL and then smack myself and say this IS normal and it IS FOREVER!!! I almost get annoyed when people say that after losing weight life is all roses and rainbows - I was a happy person before, and i'm still a happy person -- but it's still HARD!!! it's still a DRAG sometimes!!! There's no other way to say it -- it can be a total DRAG at times, having to watch and count and be careful, and i know i'll always have to be that way. I have a lot of things on auto-pilot food-wise to make life easier, but each new thing is "what is it, what's it made of, etc." ugh it gets very annoying at times LOL but considering the alternative, i'll live with it ;)

ChrissyBean
02-08-2011, 06:32 PM
Yes, I'm right there with you, and I only have myself to blame. I refuse to count calories and I refuse to give up all my treats, so it's a verrrrry slow road to trudge, but in the long run...I don't want to live without the occasional potato chips or glass of wine, so no sense cutting it out now only to binge on it later, right??

Slow and steady wins the race...eventually. ;) Okay, so we may be DFL, but we'll finish that race!

akacutie
02-08-2011, 09:54 PM
Over 2 years now.... I feel like I am fighting an uphill battler now with myself! I can't seem to get back in to the game steady like I was even a few months ago... I have lost 65 pounds... Most ever lost and the longest at it ever! :) I have been doing WW, but maybe I need something new for a bit.... Hmmmmm- Not sure....

Lyn- Your stats are awesome btw!!

Bac0s
02-09-2011, 08:01 AM
I've only been in the game since late June/early July. It feels like for.ever sometimes, and sometimes I just don't want to do it anymore. But, I've been doing it long enough that it's habit now and I don't know how to stop. Plus, if I decide, "forget this!" there's really nothing in my house to eat to "give up" with. Not much junk, so then I go "binge" on baby carrots and I'm over it. :)

Gale02
02-09-2011, 09:33 AM
I've been at this since January 2007 - sort of. I lost from 260 to 197 that year and then got pregnant. Gained 60 lbs, didn't lose any while I nursed that first year and got pregnant again immediately after weaning. Now, 5 months after the birth of #2 I am losing again. So I suppose I haven't really been trying to lose weight since 2007 since I was pregnant for almost 2 years in there, but it sure feels that way. :/

Lyn2007
02-09-2011, 04:30 PM
Every day I think about eating off plan. Every day I consider, even if for just a few seconds, going out and buying chips and junk and eating whatever I want for a couple of days and then "starting over." But I have DONE that enough times now... it has to stop, I will NEVER get there if I don't knock that crap off.

Today is Day 10 *on plan* and I so don't want to throw that away and go back to square one just for some stupid food.