Depression and Weight IssuesHave you been diagnosed with depression, are possibly on depression medication, and find it affects your weight loss efforts? Post here for support!
I feel like crap at the moment. I saw a photo of myself back in 2008 pre-bipolar diagnosis, and I looked fabulous! I don't recognise that person anymore. I feel like crying. Feel like someone yanked my heart out. I was happier, much much thinner and gosh, I was actually pretty (though i didn't think i was at the time). Now i'm at least 15-20kgs heavier and look not to mention FEEL terrible. Losing weight is harder as well because of medication. I have to work rrreaalllyy hard to lose weight. I miss 'me'. I want the old 'me' back again. Being bipolar has robbed me of soo many things, my life! At this point of time, my future seems rather bleak, my bipolar condition hasn't improved enough and I have very bad bouts of anxiety. I want my life back again. I want to feel in control. Right now I'm just cruising on autopilot. Living a very bland existence. Living day to day hoping to somehow suddenly wake up and everything will be alright again. Yeah, I know.. fat chance of that happening. Sorry for the rant, I thought I might as well write things down here instead of binging on chocolates and cry all night.
I feel the same way. I felt my life collapse around 2008 as well. It's taken me this long to actually show improvement in my weight. I still don't feel well most of the time but I keep pushing myself to be in school, to exercise and to eat right. The differences in diet and lifestyle can help snap you out of it sometimes. I tell myself that if I don't do this I'll just be worse than I was before and who knows if I can crawl back out of that hole. It is very difficult and medication doesn't help because it just whips your mood around more. Try to keep focus on at least one thing and it will get easier as you go.
Thank you Initiative, I am glad that you are doing well in school, exercising and eating right. I will definitely try to focus on at least one thing at a time and not try to do too many things at one go. I tend to plan big big things for myself, and when I fall short or things don't go well, I end up being even more depressed, then I am back to square one. Thank you again for your advice. I guess I should just take things one small step at a time.
Esha - I clicked to read this, because that's exactly how i feel too, when it's bad..'I want ME back again'. I can only tell you that it helps me alot to do a regular exercise daily, it really helps my self-worth to be able to say 'well I DID accomplish something very good for me today!' even if it's a wimpy workout. Hugs to you!!
aww honey I read this and really felt for you, i have been on and off meds for the last 12 years. and i am 4 stone heaver now and hate it. your doing so well though 9kg is alot keep at it and it will come off slowly is the best way, that way it dont come back.
I dont take meds except sleeping pills becuase the meds took away my personality and I didnt feel like me. its really hard as some days i am low and some days i am hyper but every now and again i am the "old" Marie and its worth holding out for them days.
Good luck
M
VermontMom, you are right about daily exercise, it does give me a sense of accomplishment. And it helps elevate my mood, or keeps my mood swings in check. Appreciate the hugs and advice, thanks again!
Marie81, I agree that meds seem to sap out personality, it kind of makes me feel numb and dull all the time, but I feel I am still better off taking them than not. When I wasn't on meds, I'd get crazy mood swings and tend to make really rash decisions! I wish I could go off my meds because it also causes me weight gain but I think it's important for my mental health. Pity, it's at the expense of a chunk of my personality. To be honest, I haven't felt the "old" me for a long long time. Not sure if I ever will. Maybe I just have to accept the cards that I've been dealt with and do my best. Thanks Marie81.
Hi Esha, your doing the right thing by staying on the meds when I was at my worse they helped me alot. Remember you wont be on them forever the main point is you get better again. Then you can be you again
Good luck honey
Am I being too focused on getting back the 'old' me that I am not accepting the person I am today? That I refuse to acknowledge this new person I have become? I'm in love with my 'old' self, and I haven't found love for myself. But how do you love somebody so dysfunctional?
Honey 90% of people are difuctional iv never meet a normal person yet, everyone has their own propblems even if you cant see it on the surface. when I meet my husband I was at my worse and he helped me alot as time as gone on I realise now that I should have stayed single I am an awful wife and its not just the depression, its me.
How long have you been like this? Im over 12yrs of it now just wish it would shift and I could get on with my life.
How have you been getting on with the diet this week?
I dont think your to focused on being the old you, it a time when you where happy right and you want to get beck there again, its a good thing to aim for
I was just diagnosed 2 years ago, i guess i haven't come to terms with things yet. Thanx for reminding me that most people are dysfunctional anyways, and that they have their own problems even if i can't see it on the surface. The diet? Well, i tend to snack here and there, but mostly on healthy stuff like fruits and nuts. I don't think i've been keeping to the 1200 calories per day rule though. That's something I have to work on. I managed to go to the gym twice this week though. I know it's not enough to lose weight but I'm doing my best at the moment. I hope to kick things up a notch soon. Many thanx again Marie for replying.
Esha - it's been almost a month, are things any better for you? I think there might be 'light at the end of the tunnel' for me; I just have to get through March; and April is always so much better..because of the longer days, and slightly warming weather (we'll probably have snow for a long time yet!) but once in a while I get a feeling of my old self.
Will I ever be 'me' again?
