Alternachicks - Getting Sentimental: How did you meet your partner?




barefootgrrrl
12-01-2002, 02:27 PM
It's that time of year..getting all lovey dovey..maybe it's the time spent indoors with people:lol:

Anyway, I've read so many wonderful posts here where chicks talk about their partners, girlfriends, boyfriends, boys, husbands, significant others.....

So here's my question: How did *you* meet your special someone(s)? here's a plus - maybe if there are chicks out there looking - our posts will give them ideas :)

I'll start first:

When I was in my early to mid thirties, I gave up on dating altogether and just hung out with different people...... every once in a while I thought it would be nice to meet someone special - but it just wasn't happening.

One year, right after the New Year, one of my friends suggested that I try the personals in the local newspaper (this was 1995 - my pre-net days!)

I got about 100 responses - amazing - only about 5 really seemed like a possible match - of course, looking back now - I know I was way too picky.

So I went out with bachelors 1,2,3,4 and 5 - often hilarious, but awful experiences ( I could write a book on that whole month!)

After that, I gave up again. I then noticed one day in February that my account ID (to collect voicemail messages) was about to expire. For the heck of it, I decided to check for any remaining stragglers before the account died. There was one message from a pleasant sounding guy. I called him up and we talked and talked and talked.

I got his phone # and I called him at home that night. We talked until the AM during a rare Virginia blizzard. We were both snowed in, so we talked the entire weekend - only stopping for meals and sleep. Finally the roads were cleared on Sunday afternoon. I agreed to have dinner with him. We had dinner that night together and nearly every night since.

The moral of the story - it can happen :)

Terri


sabrina
12-01-2002, 02:48 PM
Hey barefootgrrl,

Great topic!

I met my fiance' while I was still in a bad marriage. I was definitely NOT looking to hook up with another man, but it just happened.

We met online in Fall 1996, in Summer 1998 he moved out here to Oregon from the Midwest. We've been together ever since and will be married sometime next summer.

Great relationships can and do happen because of the Internet! :)

S.

Wanttolosealot
12-01-2002, 03:35 PM
No big story with my hubby! We were high school sweethearts!
Dated off and on for many years and finally decided to make the final commitment on May 19, 1990.
Virginia


barefootgrrrl
12-01-2002, 03:42 PM
Virginia...... It's wonderful that you and your husband have all those memories together.... I might have liked that had things been different.....but it's nice to think about! :)


Sabrina - I've heard of so many people meeting online. Outside of personals, does it happen in chat rooms? ( I guess I ask because I've only been in one chat room and that was enough for me! lol)


Terri

ellis
12-01-2002, 03:58 PM
What lovely stories... great idea, Terrigrrrl. :)

I met my DH on the last day of college. I'd recently lost the love of my life to suicide. I'd decided I would never meet another man so dear to me, and was NOT looking for a replacement.

DH was a charming and handsome little guy... he used to wink at me (and god knows WHO else! ;) ) in the hall, and he didn't even know me! Nervy. Very nervy.

Anyhow, he had an appointment that day with a teacher in the computer room... getting help with an end of term assignment. My girlfriend and I happened to be in there, and as we were much more attractive to the teacher than DH was, he helped US instead. And I ended up helping DH.

When he asked me to see a movie with him using the EXACT same words my first love had used, I decided... what the ****... it must be fate. And it was. That was over 16 years ago, and I love him more than ever. And if he chooses to leaves me tomorrow I'll be okay, because he's helped me so much with my personal growth. And I will NEVER marry again, because it's too much damned work. :D

flower
12-01-2002, 05:41 PM
I met my husband on a blind date. My girlfriend set us up. We had gone to the same high school, his sister was in my class. The date lasted 13 hours. We thought going to breakfast was a safe easy thing. Easy to bail if we hated one another. :) I moved in with him 2 weeks later. I was there 24/7 anyways... I was 19. We married on our 1 year anniversary of that first date. We stayed together til he died 6.5 years later.

My bf and I met at my appt about 9 months after my husband died. I was throwing an impromptu get together for my neighbor. She lived with her parents and it is kinda hard to socialize with old people around. :) He had come by, being a friend of the guy she was dating. I really didn't think much of him except that he made me laugh. I had a crush on another one of their friends. A week after valentines day, we were trying to avoid a scene from a couple who was drunk, so we sat outside and talked and talked. That night I ended up giving him a back scratch, the next night we had a one night stand. Or so I though... It had been a long time for me :) Sure, what could come out of a fling with a guy 10 years younger. WE have been together ever since. It will be 6 years on Feb 22.

VelvetCyberpunk
12-01-2002, 05:56 PM
Wow Terri! That is an awesome story! I am one of those girls who has given up on finding someone and I too am in my early to mid 30's. Your lovely story has given me hope. Thanks for the great thread, and story!

barefootgrrrl
12-01-2002, 06:16 PM
ok Ellis..... are you going to let us know those exact magic words or are they a personal secret? ( If so, that's ok - it just sounds romantic, like a movie or something!)

You are so right. It is more work than I ever realized and some days I look at him like he's an alien, but overall I think it's a good thing - if you're willing to do the work - it must be work worth doing .

flower - it's wonderful that you found love again - you have to love 6 year flings :)

oh Velvet! thanks! I am so glad - that was one of the things that made me think of it.

It sounds like a cliche I know, but often love finds us when we least expect it.:love:

Terri

sabrina
12-01-2002, 06:17 PM
Hi Terri,

You asked:

"Sabrina - I've heard of so many people meeting online. Outside of personals, does it happen in chat rooms? ( I guess I ask because I've only been in one chat room and that was enough for me! lol)"

I've been in a few chat rooms myself (not romance related) and haven't been back to any in years. Most of them were rife with weirdos.

I actually met my fiance' on a political Web site's message board! We're both left-leaning, and have almost identical views on things, and that's what got us talking. We started out being in love with each other's minds first, and then after six months of emailing and telephoning, met in person and just clicked.

We've been together here in Portland for almost 4-1/2 years now, and I can't imagine ever being happier with anyone else.
We suit each other to a "T" right down to our fondness for bathroom humor (Beavis and Butthead, anyone???).

Just proof that sometimes the best things happen to you when you least expect it ...

S.

VelvetCyberpunk
12-01-2002, 06:28 PM
Hi Sabrina! Welcome to alternachicks! I should have done this in the intro thread but I'm a bit of an airhead today. Nice to meet you!

sabrina
12-01-2002, 06:43 PM
Velvet,

Thanks for the welcome. I look forward to getting to know all of you.

I guess we're all "oddballs" in our own little ways, and so perhaps that is why this forum is so tolerant/accepting.

S., who never really felt all that different until her friends started having babies and she knew didn't want any part of that!

VelvetCyberpunk
12-01-2002, 06:50 PM
I think it's great that you aren't having kids if you don't want them. It's much more selfish and thoughtless to have kids because everyone thinks you are supposed to, then to be brave and stand up and say I don't want to be a mother. People who have kids because they are "supposed to" are often abusive, and it's not the kids fault they weren't wanted, so I say right on sister! Not everyone is meant to be a mother, just like not everyone is meant to be a nurse, or a writer.

squeaker
12-01-2002, 07:40 PM
First - welcome to Sabrina. :)

Second - I love everyone's stories :)

Third - he may not be my husband, boyfriend, significant other, or even a fling any more, but I do love the story of how my best friend and I met.

I had just gone back to college after being out for a year. I had left to go to work so I could afford to finish. I had been in for 3 years, so when I went back most of the people I knew had left. I had signed up through a campus office to be placed in an apartment. I was suppose to live with a girl & 2 guys I think. One of them had dropped out before it was time to move in. Both of the 2 remaining people went and found another roommate. So they called and asked me if I minded being placed some where else. I said no problem. I hadn't know any of them so it wasn't like I had any attachments to it. So I ended up in Apt 32 with 3 girls who I now love dearly. One of which knows everyone and thier brother. :) (I know you are thinking where is she going with this)
Well Miss Chick, as I always like to called her, had been a RA (residance advisor) on a freshman floor the year before. One day, about a week after I moved in, this guy comes home with her. It was one of the guys who had lived on her floor the year before. They had run into each other on campus and he came back to the apt. to catch up on her summer. I said hello, when they came in, but I was watching something on TV and was making dinner so I didn't pay too much attention right away. Well, my dinner finished and I was sitting at the island that seperated our kitchen from the living room. My roommate got a phone call. The boy was also sitting at the counter while she was on the phone. I said hello again and asked how he was and such since he was just kind of sitting there. I figured I would be polite. I don't remember exactly what got us started on real conversation, but my roommate's phoen call ended she said a few more things to the boy and got ready to go out. It was a Thursday night, the phone call was from some of her friends that were going to a club. They were leaving in a few minutes. The boy was only 19 so he could not go too. he and I had been talking for 20 minutes or so now. It was around 10:30pm when she left, and told him to stay as long as he wanted and she would call him tomorrow.
Well we really hit it off. We stayed at the counter until 2:30am when my roommate came home. During the night we woudl keep saying "Its getting late, I have class in the morning", but niether was willing to really end it. When Miss Chick walked in the door and saw us still there, the look on her face was priceless. You could see the wheels in her head turning trying to figure out what was going on. She later told me we had both had looks like we had gotten caught doing something we weren't suppose to. She asked him what he was still doing there. The 3 of us ended up playing Trivial Pursuit until 4am when he left.
He wasn't out the door for more then 20 seconds when she started grilling me about the whole thing. He first question - "So do you like him?" I told her yes. I also told her I knew I didn't care what happened between me and him but I did not want that to be the only night he and I talked. I told her that "I knoew I want him in my life some how". I left that morning for home. I spent the weekend at home, went back to school Sunday, and worked Sunday night. I came home and found out my roommate had given him my screen name on a chat program. He had left me a little message. Just a hello. On Monday night he and I started talking on-line and ended up talking until 4am again. But during that time he had asked me on a date. That whole process was so silly. He had been talking to both me and my roommate. She would show me what he was saying about me. So I knew he had a thing for me. She kept trying to get me to ask him out. I wouldn't. I was a big :chicken: Then all of a sudden she came running into my room to watch my reaction. She knew he was going to ask me for a date. I of course said yes.

We were only together for 3 months. It was in the middle of a really rough time for me. And ironiclly, I wouldn't talk to him about it. I just pushed him away with no explaination. He was really hurt. We didn't really talk or see each other for about 6 months after. Then he had gone through some stuff and apologized to me for how HE acted! I did the same. Told him a little about what had been going on. We have since become very close. We have known each other for a little over 3 years now.

Ok that was very very long. Sorry! :o

:mouse:squeak

Wildfire
12-01-2002, 09:02 PM
I met my hubby (second installment) online in a....chat room :sssh:

This was oh...seven years ago...when there were actually chat rooms out there with much the same atmosphere as this board....meeting friends, hanging out, chatting, laughing, crying, etc., together. We were having a pyjama party in a private room (probably 30 of us there) and I invited him in from the lobby, as we'd chatted a few times prior. It went from there...chatting more and more and late into the wee hours of the night, then phone calls, and exchanging pictures, and snail mail, and little surprise gifts. I was on the east coast of Canada and he was on the west coast of the States.....on complete opposite sides of the continent, nevermind different countries!

I was offered a job in Ontario and he was finishing out his contract with the US Navy (did 7 years on the Nimitz) and didn't want to renew. He has family in PA, and made the trip to Toronto a few times until I got my own place (initially I stayed with an uncle when I first arrived here), and then he was here more than there. We went through 2 hellish years of waiting for his Permanent Residency to be approved. :censored: Government red tape :censored: Really...what would Canada want with an educated ex-Navy man when there are so many less enticing people sneaking into our country every day??? Grrrrr. Anyhooo......We were married on Hallowe'en 1998, and I can't imagine ever being with anyone else. I trust him completely, and that's no small thing.

dentrassi
12-01-2002, 11:07 PM
WELL!! I met my hubby through some college housemates. He had gone to highschool with two of them, came up to visit them and VOILA!! Okay, the FIRST time I met him I tolerated him (I was coming out of a men are scum phase), and the next time I described him as "This guy with big brown eyes" to a friend. The NEXT time he came to visit I lured him up to my room by playing music he like LOUD. When he came up I rubbed Tiger Balm on his temples and the next morning we had our first date!! (He slept on the couch over my objections!!) At the young age of 21 I had already decided I would never meet anyone I wanted to spend my life with, and he proved me completely wrong!! We decided within 3 months that we wanted to get married, but kept it "secret" and actually got married about 2 years later. By the time we told everyone we were engaged the USUAL response we got was "DUH!" OH! With the exception of one friend who said, "You two deserve each other." And we still do 21 years (married) later!!!:cloud9:

ellis
12-02-2002, 12:19 AM
What lovely stories.... :)

Terrigrrrl, it's not very romantic...
He said, "I was wondering if you'd care to take in a show with me?" I mean really.... most people just say, "Hey, do you want to go and see a movie sometime?"
It was like a voice from ... from... you know. Too bizarre. :lol:

soozie
12-02-2002, 04:17 AM
Okay...since I'm already up this late I'll try to do this...I've always thought of publishing this story someday so this will be my first draft...also, forget confidentiality because anyone who knows us well will recognize this story.

My partner and I met at a lesbian camping weekend. It's called the Sisterspace Lesbian Feminist Pocono Weekend! or the LFW...can you even believe that?
It was started over thirty years ago by a small group of women and just grew and grew...but, kept the name.

I planned to go with my older sister who is also a lesbian. I had been to the LFW a couple of times before. This time I was single. I was recovering from some wounds from the past two loves. Work had been a little stressful and I just wanted to go and relax. My sister was meeting her partner up at camp. Her partner was working there and had gone up early. My sister and her partner were camping in tents. No way for me...six summers as a girl scout camp counselor had more than supplied my quota for tent sleeping. I wanted to stay in a cabin...with running water and flush toilets.

One of my friends was staying in a cabin with a group of her friends. She welcomed me to bunk in with them. Now, being a lesbian event you had a choice
of signing up for a "quiet" cabin or a "chem-free" cabin. I wanted quiet and chem-free. I didn't want to be around a bunch of drunk or high loud people. I was concerned that I wouldn't be able to get enough rest. Afterall, I was going there to be quiet and meditative...to relax and recooperate from life, surrounded by alot of trees and alot of chicks.

I was disappointed and nervous because my friend was signed up for a regular cabin. Oh great, they'll keep me up all night and be partying and obnoxious, I thought. But, I went anyway.

My sister and I drove up together and got ourselves settled in. We decided to go to a play late Friday afternoon...they have all sorts of stuff going on up there. When it was over we were walking outside. I commented to my sister that one of the actresses looked like an old friend of ours. We were speculating about whether or not the old friend was a lesbian. I said, "well she was pretty butch." From behind this woman comes up between us, puts her arms around both of our shoulders and says..."butch, who, where, do you like them that way?"

We stopped and started conversing with her. We told her that we were sisters and she said, "sisters... really?" I said, "we're ALL sisters here." Then we introduced ourselves. My sister and I cracked up when she told us her name...ironically, she had the same first name as our mother. When we explained why we were laughing she said, "oh, you really are sisters...are you together?" She meant...TOGETHER! We were totally disgusted and said "NO!"...my sister mentioned that her partner was working on the steering committee for the weekend and I said that I was single. The woman replied, "hmmmm single, ahhhh, that's a shame, well, we'll see about that..."

Skip to later that night at the dance. One of my friend's friends who was sharing our cabin asks me to walk out of the dance with her. We walk down to the pool and sat on a bench. She starts to tell me how she and her partner aren't doing well and next thing you know she's kissing me...it feels nice but, I think about her partner and how slimey this is, I stop her, she protests...I get up and walk away annoyed. My friend finds me and says...so and so's girlfriend is pissed because you two left the dance together and someone saw you kissing by the pool. I say, tell her partner not to worry, it will never happen again, at least not with me!

I say to myself, sis is off in her buggy and uncomfortable tent with her partner, I'm stuck here with my friend and her friends... why did I come here with this group of women? They're a mess. They want to party all night and fight with each other and I don't want to get involved in other people's messes. I go back into the dance by myself. I notice this incredibly attractive young blonde. I say to myself...she is the hottest woman here, but unfortunately, she thinks so too. (I'll come back to her later!)

I sit on a chair...wallflower...and feel sorry for myself for awhile. I scan the crowd for a familiar face, someone to talk to, dance with...I see the wild funny woman with my mother's name, she is dancing with two of her friends...I think...hmmmm...three is an odd number for dancing. Totally out of character, I get up, walk over, and start dancing with them...with her...the woman with the name.

We try to talk over the volume of the music. She asks me if I would like to "go out somewhere" later. I laugh. We're in the middle of the woods. Our cars are
parked in. We're not going anywhere until Sunday morning. She's asking me out on a date! Too cute.

Then she remembers she has to do her work shift. Remember, lesbians. All attendees have to do a two hour work shift. You know the whole cooperative communal deal. So, her work shift is "security" from 11:00pm to 1:00am. She asks me which cabin I'm in and says she'll come "pick me up" at 1:00am after her work shift.

I say okay, but, getting nervous, I add an out that I am a heavy sleeper so if I'm sleeping when she arrives she should just catch me another time. Afterall, I don't even know this woman and I'm the one who ISN'T going to be up partying all night. Before she leaves the dance she tells me that her assignment is to "guard" the campfire...she makes a comment about putting out a fire "down there" with a part of her anatomy. Who is this woman? Then she leans over and lays an amazing kiss on me! Open mouth! Hey, we just met! I'm totally taken aback...and intrigued.

I tell my friend. She says, "whoa...what are you going to do when she comes by at 1am?" I say..."ummmm....I don't know. Pretend that I'm sleeping?" My friend is totally amused as we walk back to our cabin. This is so not my style...I'm the conservative one...I have never had a one night stand, never picked anyone up in a club, nothing of the sort.

I go into the cabin thinking that I made a mistake. I decide that I'll hurry up and fall asleep to avoid the wild woman. My friend and her friends are on the porch smoking. My friend comes in..."there is someone here to see you". I walk out onto the darkened porch. There she is. Early. Two hours early. She is passing something back to my friend. She looks at me and says, holding her breath, "you smoke?" "No", I say firmly. She turns her head to exhale away from me and turns back quickly saying..."me neither".

And so the date begins. She tells me that her friends got rerouted to patrol the tent area and that she has to gaurd the campfire area by herself. She is armed with a flashlight. She is scared really and wants me to come with her. I do. I tell her not to worry, I'm a girl scout.

She keeps forgetting my name...calling me different names...she keeps telling me how adorable I am...I keep telling her how adorable she is...she keeps asking me if her friends put me up to this...if they're paying me to hang out with her...she is funny...and flirtatious...and flattering...she's using all the worst lines that I've ever heard...I'm smitten.

She asks me if I know why women come to this weekend, she asks me if I know what LFW stands for. I say, "of course, Lesbian Feminist Weekend" She says, "no, Let's F*** Weekend" I say, "I'm not that kind of girl". She says "me either".

Two hours go by and the work shift is ending. She says to me..."I don't want to pressure you. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. Really, no pressure. You decide what you want to do. After this work shift,you can come back to my cabin with me. Or, you can go back to your cabin...and I'll come with you." No pressure. She made me laugh so much. I invited her back to my cabin.

We start walking away from the campfire and the cocky wild woman gets nervous and asks me to come to her cabin instead. I comply. Ironically, her cabin is right next door to mine. We fall into her 24inch wide cot and I'll say no more...except that I was a total hypocrite...thinking that I needed to be in a quiet cabin. We spent the night there. In the morning we could hear my friend and her friends next door speculating as to where I was. We went back to sleep, slept through breakfast and went to lunch.

After lunch we went back to my cabin and continued what we had started the night before. Then we split up, vowing to get together again later...but, later, Wild came to tell me that her ex-girlfriend (the gorgeous blonde from the dance) had seen us at lunch. The ex wanted to spend some time with her to "talk". I deferred to the ex-girlfriend and saying, "we just met, you and she have history, do what you have to do."

On Sunday Wild stopped into my cabin before she left camp. She was headed for the airport to visit a friend in the mid-west. As she sat there, handing me a little piece of paper with her name and address and telephone number on it, I couldn't take my eyes off of her eyes. I couldn't wipe the grin off of my face. There we sat...staring at each other and smiling until her friends called to her for a third time that they had to leave.

She called me twice from her trip to the mid-west and sent me a postcard. When she got home we went out on our first date. My first one night stand turned into fifteen years! and counting! She does remember my name now.

(The story of the final ending between her and her blonde bombshell ex is in chapter two!)
Love, Soozie

VelvetCyberpunk
12-02-2002, 06:09 AM
Arrrgh! A cliffhanger! Why would you do that to me! LOL!

What a great story! I love it! I think that's so great, and to be together for 15 years too! How romantic! *sigh* Maybe one day I'll find someone, and have my own great story to tell.

Hurry with the rest! I'm dyin' to know about the gorgeous blonde!

Ruthxxx
12-02-2002, 07:12 AM
I am sooooo boring.
I met the first one bowling! The second one at a family wedding!
Conservachick

barefootgrrrl
12-02-2002, 09:52 AM
me too! I am dying ova heya to know the rest of the story! he he


Ok, now I did I follow the story correctly? Wild is your DP?

Sorry I was getting confused!


Terri

Lamorgan
12-02-2002, 01:57 PM
What a wonderful thread idea...

I met my hubby at college in 1982, I was 19. We married in '84. Started reproducing in '87. Didn't stop until '96. Moved around a million times. Somehow managed to grow up together, and stay together. Sometimes I feel very restless, it's a 40 thing, I think. I am married to my best friend, and can't believe my luck, and he has given me happiness for half my life. I wasn't very happy in my first half, so all in all I feel that life is pretty good.

I do believe that there is a lot of love and potential for love out there. I don't think that there is only one love, but many.

Limitless.

When I first met him he really irritated me. Sometimes he still does... I must irritate him too. :)

Lois

soozie
12-02-2002, 04:46 PM
Yes, Wild is my DP.

I'll try to make this one brief so I won't be late for work.

Cut to two months later...Gorgeous Blonde is out of the picture...they had broken up but she was jealous when she saw DP and I together a the LFW so she wanted to get DP's attention.

DP and I have been dating but there has been no discussion of exclusivity or monogamy. DP tells me that ex, ie. gorgeous blonde wants to take DP out to dinner for DP's birthday and to put some "closure" on things. I ask DP if she plans to sleep with ex. DP says, "I don't know". I say, "How can you not know?" "That is a decision you make." DP thinks that her genitals will determine this...not her mind.

So, I assume, yeah, they'll probably have one last go at it. Whatever. We're not married but I'm not thrilled about it.

I make plans to visit my friend Eric and his partner that night...so I won't be sitting around wondering. When I get to his house he has invited some other people...my ex, (we had been apart two years at that point) her brother, and another mutual friend of ours. My ex and her bro both live in the city so they walked to Eric's house.

We all talk for awhile and then decide to get some pizza for dinner. Eric's partner goes out to pick up the pizza and sees my DP with some gorgeous blonde going into a nice restaurant in the neighborhood. He comes back to Eric's house with hot pizza and hot gossip. He tells everyone but me that he saw the woman that I'm dating with another woman. (obviously, I hadn't mentioned to them that the woman I was dating was going out with her ex that night)

At the end of the evening I offer to drive my ex and her bro home to their places because it is dark and cold outside. They both accept. Bro lives further West so I'll drop ex off first and then her bro.

Last minute bro says he wants to walk home. So, I drive ex to her apt. She says in car that she isn't feeling too well and wishes someone was waiting upstairs to make her a cup of tea. I say, "I'll come up and make you a cup of tea. No problem."

I go up, make her a cup of tea, spend the night...oops....:^:

Next day I'm at work. Get a call from DP. She is still in the city...(I worked in the city and lived there but DP lived in New Jersey) So, I figure she spent the night with ex. I say, "did you sleep with ex? I mean, I hope you did, because I did." DP comes over to my office and meets me for lunch. She lets me sweat it for awhile since I confessed first. Then she admits to sleeping with ex.

We both further confess that sleeping with ex and ex solidifies our conviction that we only want to be with each other...being with someone else just didn't cut it...for either of us.

So, instead of being a problem it actually made us feel more intimate...more bonded. And we were both amused at the plethora of coincidences...my ex was at Eric's that night, her bro decided to walk, she didn't drive her car...Eric's partner saw my DP and the blonde when he went out to get the pizza...

the end...the beginning...
Love, Soozie

ellis
12-02-2002, 05:01 PM
Good grief!! This is so graphic!!!
please, tell us more...

VelvetCyberpunk
12-02-2002, 08:18 PM
:joker:

Ellis you are so funny!

Yeah Sooz! Tell us more!!!!

dentrassi
12-02-2002, 10:48 PM
Lots of great stories here!!!

Sojourner
12-03-2002, 02:42 AM
Its 1993 and I have just finished college and went back to my dinky hometown for a few months. I get a job at a local bookstore while trying to figure out what to do next in my life. So there is this hot... really hot... out of my league hot guy working there who is friendly and funny and smart. He has just finished college with a teaching degree and is thinking about the Peace Corps. Being the gutsy and ambitious alternachick that I am, I decide to pursue him.

Its October and I manage to arrange our schedules so we worked a few shifts together and we start to get to know each other. Out of the blue he asks me out for coffee... with heart racing I say yes. So we meet at a local diner and drink bad coffee. He talks about himself for a couple hours and I'm thinking, give me a break. I point this out and ask if he is interested in learning about me. Looking slightly stunned, he seems to really look at me for the first time. I think that was the moment, the moment I captured the first bit of his heart and that he realized I was different than "the other girls".

So he went out of town that weekend and his car breaks down in a parking lot. We haven't spoken and then he calls me Saturday and I offer to drive him to the city where the car is stalled. His piece of crap Pontiac was a catalyst for our relationship... the thing was so old you literally had to hold two wires together to start it! :lol: But I had him as a captive audience the hour drive there. We talk and laugh and enjoy the autumn day. I tell him he has a nice *** when he is looking in the hood of the car. He doesn't stand a chance.

He asks me if I want to go out dancing on Halloween and I agree, this is obviously a date. So this hunky guy shows up at the door dressed as a Chippendale! I am shocked at his audacity but totally smitten. He has huge muscles and is shockingly handsome. Strange women are shoving dollar bills down his pants all night at the club. We dance too close and I whisper in his ear "You know that once you get to know me you are going to fall in love with me." He looks at me and just smiles. That night I go home and announce to my family that I have met the man I am going to marry.

We spend every day together... but he wants to take things slowly. I am completely in love with him. I can't get enough of his mind, his body, his gorgeous green eyes, his kisses. Many men have fallen in love with me right away and here is the man of my dreams taking his time! He tells me he wants to be sure this time. He actually wants to wait to have sex... he completely respects me and says he wants our first time to be meaningful. This is definitely not your average guy. On Valentine's Day he drives me up to a cliff overlooking our hometown and reads me a poem he wrote and tells me he loves me for the first time. He's sure.

In March he makes plans for dinner and tells me to dress up and meet him at the bookstore after closing. When I get there he pulls out this little plastic box with a corsage in it and asks me to wear it to dinner. I open the box and attached to the roses is this stunning diamond engagement ring... when I look up in shock he is down on one knee and asks me to spend the rest of my life with him. I cry, I say yes, he looks relieved, and we are married in June... after only eight months together. We make love for the first time on our honeymoon. He is amazing and wonderful and beatiful. We just celebrated our eighth wedding anniversary this June and we have an incredible marriage. I am so very blessed.

VelvetCyberpunk
12-03-2002, 04:12 AM
Oh my God! What a beautiful story! It made me a little teary just reading that! Wow, how great to be that in love. Thanks for sharing that with us Sojo!

Wanttolosealot
12-03-2002, 09:51 AM
Soozie,
That was the greastest love story. You and your DP are a match made at LFW. I had never heard of it before, however, my friend Pam keeps telling me about the weekend camping trip her and a group of Lesbian friends used to go on every year. SHe has not gone in a while but wants me to go with her this summer. Sounds like a lot of fun!
Sojo,
Your story was beautiful! You sound like a perfect match. All of your stories are great.
Virginia

Ruthxxx
12-03-2002, 11:03 AM
You mean that you can have sex with someone and not be married to them? Wow! What interesting stories you youg chickies have!

Anybody into interspecies dating? I may try that after my sex change is complete. (The wrist stories are just a cover-up - although I do believe that wrist operations are the first step in conversion to male - just in case the new "man" doesn't get lucky.)

soozie
12-03-2002, 12:41 PM
Is that Ruth the self-titled conservachick or some sleeze-ball who is sitting at her computer...an imposter! Yes, it must be that evil alterego who always eats so much junk food...Ruth, fight back, run towards the light, don't let her stay in control...she's EEEEEEEVIL....I'll try to channel an exorcist...I'll be back.....

soozie
12-03-2002, 12:45 PM
and...oh you Ellis! graphic indeed...all I said was genitals! and sleep with! enough to get me booted from anything that screens out porn but really girlfriend, I know that you want details, but, as i said to DP so many years ago...
(again, use that Scarlett O'Hara accent)
I'm just not that kind of girl!!!!!

ellis
12-03-2002, 12:47 PM
Yeah, it's Ruthless. She's freakin' scary, man.

barefootgrrrl
12-03-2002, 12:51 PM
come on Ruth......it's the other way around!

You can be married and NOT have sex with them


:lol:


PS to Sojo - luv your story :) It should be on that cable channel...what's it called TLC - life stories? :)


Terri

katrinabgood
12-03-2002, 01:15 PM
Ohmigod, what GREAT stories!!

Mine seems kind of boring now...

DH's brother in law is from the same town I'm from, in NJ. He joined the Air Force and was stationed in CA, where he met and married dh's sister. DH met his BILs sister and became smitten...so much that he moved 3000 miles to be near her. She worked at the same hpspital as I. He got a job there as a security guard and met ME! :love: Started hanging around my desk a bit more than hers. We became friends but within a group that would hang out together and go to football games, parties, out drinking. (SHE did not join us...didn't like our "rowdy crowd!") DH and I discovered that we could talk and talk and talk for hours and hours about anything and everything under the sun...eventually he became engaged to that girl, but I believe it was more out of a sense of obligation to her. They were SO different! We remained friends but it was becoming apparent that we felt more than friendship for each other. When we finally acted on those feelings, I was wracked with guilt, didn't want to be "the other woman" and told him we couldn't see each other ever again...(so sad...so very sad)...It didn't last long. He finally broke thier engagement, but AGAIN I was racked with guilt and didn't want to be the cause so I pushed him away. I must say he was persistent and eventually got what he wanted! ME!

That was a L*O*N*G time ago...we will be married 20 years in July...and we still haven't run out of things to talk about!

Keep those stories coming...they're all great!!

dentrassi
12-03-2002, 01:41 PM
Ruth-I'm confused. Are you the GRANDMOTHER of those puppies or the FATHER????!?

Well!! My actual engagement was far less romantic than Sojo's!!! We had been talking around it for a month already (this was 3 months after our first date!) and I knew that this was the person I wanted to spend my life with. We were lying in bed with DH on top of me....TALKING (We did this quite a bit), and out of the blue he asked me to marry him!!! I was so freaked out that I said, "NO!" He asked,"Why not?" in a very hurt tone. As I was trying to explain to him that I loved him but wasn't ready yet, this little voice inside me started screaming, "SAY YES YOU F@CKING IDIOT!!" So I said yes!! Then I went on to explain that I KNEW he was the one I wanted to spend my life with, but I hadn't expected us to decide that quickly. I also told him I wanted to finish college first. He wanted to get married right away!!! Funny though! BOTH of us started out thinking marriage was just a piece of paper and we'd live together with whoever, and yet we wound up doing the formal thing!!
As formal as we get anyway!! Nice non-religious ceremony in DH's Aunt's backyard!!! (The minister was a co-worker/friend of my Dad's who said he'd feel like a hypocrite marrying us in his church. We said, "That's okay, we'd feel LIKE hypocrites getting married in your church!!") It was great. Friends, family, a ceremony and then good food under a big tent. We had fun at our own wedding!!!

Sojourner
12-03-2002, 04:07 PM
I love everyone's stories... but Soozie definitely wins for hottest relationship! I have to laugh because normally my previous relationships were MUCH different than my relationship with DH. Lets just say my nickname should have been "wild" up to that point. :s: (yeah, ok, maybe I sort of was that kind of girl...) It was all so different with dh, I just knew he was the one.

ellis
12-03-2002, 04:21 PM
Den, that's so much like us. :lol: About 3 months after we met, DH said, "I love you" (he wasn't on top of me at the time... you girls are just too graphic for delicate little moi), and my head just about flew off. LOVED ME!!?? After 3 months!? Naturally I lied and said I loved him, too. (****, when you find a guy as good as mine and he falls for you right away, you've gotta figure... "****, I'll fall in love with him LATER!"
As of course I did. :D

Kat, your story is beautiful. :)

I love all of your stories...

mauvaisroux
12-03-2002, 09:38 PM
What great stories you all have!


I met my DH at a record store in the late 80's. A mutual friend worked there and we had both dropped by to see her. He had long black hair tied in a pony tail and icy blue eyes.

She introduced us and we said "hi" then went our seperate ways. One Saturday night a few weeks later the same friend, another friend and I went to a local new wave/punk club and there he was there with two of his friends and we joined them for a drink. He had his hair all spiked up like Robert Smith and was wearing jeans and a black leather jacket (drool!)

DH and I started talking and discovered that we had the same sense sarcastic sense of humour. I went up to the bar to get a drink and when I came back he told me the zip was coming down a bit at the back of my mini skirt. I said " oh, checking out my *** were you?", he flushed and said yes and I just laughed.

His friends wanted to go to another club in another part of town and he asked where me and my friends where were goingto be later. I said that we would probably be there later since that's where we usually ended up at the end of the night anyway(me trying to play it cool :lol: )

Later on at the other club we talked more and danced (ah the "80's :cool: ) and at the end of the night he left with his friends and I left with mine.

The following Monday afternoon at work (I worked in a clothing/jewellry store), I had just finished serving a customer when I turned around and a white carnation was in front of my nose~he was on the other end of it!

He had remembered where I worked and came to see me on his lunch hour! We chatted a bit and then he asked if he could call me some time, I said yes. The dingbat thought that I was blowing him off and started to leave when I said "hey, if you are going to call me don't you need my number?" :lol:

We arranged to meet that day afterwork for coffee. That coffee date lasted 6 hours! I thought that he was just another pretty boy but he turned out to have a brain too-I was smitten.

We were both seeing other people but not in a serious way and so we went out on a few more dates. One night when we were walking home from a date he stopped dead in his tracks and turned to me and said "So what do you want?" I just looked at him blankly ~I didn't know what to say. "Do you want to make a go of this?" he said. "Sure, if you want to" was my reply.

So we broke off with the other people we were seeing and saw each other exclusively.

A year later he bought me promise ring, then a year after that we moved in together. The following year he proposed~total surprise to me and he picked out the ring himself!

We will have been married 10 years in May 2003.

soozie
12-04-2002, 01:54 PM
Oh, I so love everyone's stories! It feels so good to read about LOVE!!!!!
Sojo, you and I are like opposites...I was boring and then...and you were....well, ahhhh, let's say naughty and then wifely. (I'm sure you're not totally un-naughty now but don't respond to that because we're trying to shelter Ellis.)

Mauvais, can we ban Ruthless from this website...you see, those stories weren't written by me at all...in fact, my partner and I didn't even kiss until the sixth date...and like Ruth suggested we're not going to have sex until we're married...and who knows how long that will take. Well, that's the story that I wrote but somehow Ruthless got in here and edited in her obscene version of my very slow moving and tender love affair with my DP. That Ruthless is......ruthless!!!!!

Love, Soozie

choci
12-05-2002, 03:39 PM
I have a successful chatroom on-line romance story! I used to frequent a chat room that was on a small, indie music label's website (the website was Tweekitten and the chat room was called the Cutie Club, believe it or not!). My BF was one of the first people I chatted with there, but only as friends since we were both sort of occupied otherwise for quite a while... in fact I started going to the CC because the girl I was dating at the time frequented there, and it was cheaper than calling Canada!

Anyway, shortly after we first chatted, he sent me one of those pass-along questionnaires, and I remember thinking that he sounded like my perfect boy based on his answers! We continued to be friendly on-line, and he even called me a few times (the girlfriend was no longer after two months). He seemed really nice, and I liked his southern accent -- he's from Tennessee. But nothing happened romantically at all, except harmless flirting, for about two years!

I had gone through several boyfriends and girlfriends over the course of our friendship, and he had one person he was focused on (but not really dating). Eventually, there came a time when neither of us was involved, and we just clicked. It was like we just decided, OK, let's try this. About two weeks after that I had a crisis -- too much work, school, life -- and called into work and school and drove down to TN to meet him.

He was very shy at first, and we spent the evening that I arrived listening to music and talking... I didn't really know what he was thinking. I thought he was sweet and nice, but it wasn't fireworks initially. All I can say is, by the time I left a few days later, we were both very unhappy that I had to leave.

Almost three years later, we're still together, and he's lived here in upstate NY with me for most of that time! We bicker a lot (it's mostly me being a drama queen), but I can't imagine life without him, and he insists he's not going anywhere despite my moodiness! I love him soooo much. And he's since grown his hair really long and has a cool bushy beard! CUTE!

So, yep... it can happen!

dentrassi
12-05-2002, 10:34 PM
ooh!!! I love long hair on guys!!

ellis
12-06-2002, 08:13 AM
Duh! No kidding, Den!! :lol:

mauvaisroux
12-06-2002, 10:53 AM
Yeah...long hair...My DH had shoulder length hair when I met him and grew it to almost waist length which he kept up until about 3 years ago. His hair was so thick and wavy that it looked like a rope when you braided it. He had the kind of hair a lot of women wish for- damn it was annoying! I was so envious.

When we were in Cuba women stared at him every where we went and kept coming up to him and touching his hair. Most of the Cuban men had short hair so this apparently was something very intriguing to these Cuban women. Good job I don't have an insanely jealous streak or I could have caused and international incident ! :lol:

dentrassi
12-06-2002, 10:08 PM
At its longest my DH's hair was down to the small of his back...and he has a Looong torso!! His used to be SUPER thick too, but he has been shedding. He still has a lot of hair, but it isn't as thick as it used to be. (When his hair was at its longest it would burn out motors in vacuum cleaners!!! Instead of breaking it would wrap around the roller in the vacuum cleaner, and BOOM!!
I lost 2 of them that way, and then got smart and went out and bought a canister vacuum!!!)

He ALSO has LONG THICK dark lashes!!!

Mauvais-You lucky thing you!!! I would LOVE to go to Cuba!!! Love the music, love the food, love the people, am going to put Castro on my sexiest people list........(Okay, the last one is a lie)

sabrina
12-07-2002, 01:30 AM
I guess I'm the oddball here - I don't like long hair OR facial hair on men. I like the clean cut look. :)

Truth be told, I'd prefer a smooth chest as well, but don't
tell my fiance. Sssshhhhhhhhhhhhh ...

LOL!

S.

mauvaisroux
12-08-2002, 03:21 AM
I don't like facial hair much either. It's okay if it is a neatly kept goatee but when it starts to grow outward and away from the face and starts approaching ZZ Top territory...YUCK!!!!!!

dentrassi
12-08-2002, 09:49 AM
I don't mind SOME facial hair, but when it is long and stringy and has yesterday's dinner in it........(blech!)

ellis
12-08-2002, 09:57 AM
I like my DH with a beard. He looks very handsome. Besides, when he's clean-shaven, he looks younger than me. (that will NEVER do!) And all the women look at him. That will never do, either. ;) He usually shaves it off in the summer. Although he hates shaving, so most of the time it's either a beard or a "rough look".
He DOES have a problem with getting food on his nose, though. Eating ice cream or perogies with sour cream... there's always a blob on the tip of his big handsome nose. Naturally if we're out in public I don't tell him. I don't like him to look too good. :lol:

dentrassi
12-08-2002, 10:12 AM
SNEAKY!! Maybe I should try that too!!! (tee hee)

ellis
12-08-2002, 10:16 AM
Uh huh... once we're sleek and beautiful again, they can look as pretty as they want, right Den?

mauvaisroux
12-08-2002, 11:58 AM
Er...don't you mean they can look as pretty as WE want?
:lol:

ellis
12-08-2002, 01:57 PM
Yes, that's EXACTLY what I meant, Mauvais. ;)

dentrassi
12-08-2002, 07:04 PM
Other women used to try to pick him up right in front of me!!!! The thing that's funny is he didn't even REALIZE it until I pointed it out!!! (And then he'd say, "I thought she was acting kinda strange."!!)

ellis
12-08-2002, 11:49 PM
Yeah... tell me about it, Den. :rolleyes:
Some women are pure *****es.