I don't know excatally where to put this, but I just needed to get this off my chest, and I know you all here would understand.
I had a co-worker come up to me today and tell me about a conversation that went on in the lunch room and wanted to talk to me about it.
One of the ladies at work (who is fairly overweight) was complaining about losing weight and mentioned me. She complained to the other teachers that sure I lost weight, but I starved myself. Now, the teacher that told me about it defended me in conversation and mentioned how she really didn't think I starved myself, how she had seen plenty of facebook accounts about the food I was eating (I like to eat, and get really excited when I get to eat something special ) and didn't think that I starved myself at all.
Now of course I didn't starve myself, I simply ate less. And I remember the conversation that I had with the origional teacher that sparked this. She asked how I lost weight, and I told her I ate less. She replied, "Oh, but you excercized!" And I said, of course I excercised, but I at a LOT less.
It really drives me crazy that people do not want to admit that food is the problem. Nobody wants to eat less. But it's a simple fact that you cannot eat the way that made you overweight in the first place and think that excercise will fix it. That outlook will NEVER get you at a normal weight. I think excercise is very important, and it is a vital component to a healthy lifestyle, but it won't fix it. As it's said here, "You can't out excercise bad eating habits." But not very many people will accept it.
Ok, I'm going to stop now, this is my soap box and I need to let it go. It was just really frustrating and I needed to get it out to people who would understand!
Well, for this woman, who is probably on the couch at night stuffing herself with XL bags of chocolate bars and eating over 4000+ calories per day (I was there, BTW) eating 1200-1500 calories does seem like "starvation". Even though we know it is not.
Sounds like a lot of people I've encountered. They want to lose weight, but aren't committed to actually do the work. They create excuses. I think the thing that made it click for me was that I wanted to lose the weight and I was willing to do WHATEVER IT TOOK.
I'm not sure why your coworker who was privy to this conversation wanted to talk to you about it. My off the cuff reaction is that she might be a gossip?
Don't let this get to you. You know that you did this by being healthy, and eating healthy. If others make excuses regarding your healthy weight loss, that is their problem.
O wow! That is crazy insane and very disrespectful. I think she is just jealous of your success and wishes she could get to where u are WITHOUT the work. You are complete right about the eating less. Until i started counting calories i didnt even realize how much i was putting into my body! We live in a super size world and its really too much food.
I started this journey 10 weeks ago and the first challenge i had was to train my stomach to prepare for less food. It's not starving yourself but just giving your body the appropriate amount that it needs. Of course when you are use to over eating every single meal, eating whats appropriate will be a huge difference lol. The idea is training your stomach lol. I eat 6 small meals a day and I stay pretty full most of the day.
I think that you should approach the teacher about how you feel because its DEFINITELY not fair to you. You worked super hard to drop the pounds and deserve good credit. Dont let her taint it! If it makes you feel any better, i consider you to be a true inspiration!
When you're heavier and you see a thinner person, it's easy to convince yourself that they are just 'naturally thin'. BUT when you work with someone that was heavy and everyone has seen the metamorphosis of them losing weight and becoming lean, you can no longer depend on the crutch that they were just born that way.
It's an unspoken challenge, to challenge them to be better people.
There is an old saying that 'great people hang out with great people'. That is very true. We chose to either hang around people that challenge us to be the most we can be OR we hang around people that allows us to settle for whatever we become.
It's very motivating for those that want to change their lives, and can be depressing for those that are choosing not to.
Awesome for you for, perhaps unwittingly, becoming that role model.!
The fact is that you were able to restrain yourself by eating less, combined with excercising, was so ridiculous to her because she can not bring herself to do it as well.
Every person that has had trouble with weight, or is having trouble goes through a rough period of time where they just can't bring themselves to do it, and stick to it.
Starving yourself is not a way to lose weight. In fact when you starve, yourself your body can go into starvation mode. Therefore keeping the fat, instead of burning it off.
You have to eat food to lose weight. Eating a reasonable amount, cutting back from normal amounts, and introducing fruits and veggies are all part of it.
The thing is, you did it, you struggled, you survived. You don't have to prove anything to her. People say what they want to say, for whatever reason they say it.
From high school to the workforce, these things tend to be apart of our lives. Its just something that happens..
When you're heavier and you see a thinner person, it's easy to convince yourself that they are just 'naturally thin'. BUT when you work with someone that was heavy and everyone has seen the metamorphosis of them losing weight and becoming lean, you can no longer depend on the crutch that they were just born that way.
It's an unspoken challenge, to challenge them to be better people.
There is an old saying that 'great people hang out with great people'. That is very true. We chose to either hang around people that challenge us to be the most we can be OR we hang around people that allows us to settle for whatever we become.
It's very motivating for those that want to change their lives, and can be depressing for those that are choosing not to.
Awesome for you for, perhaps unwittingly, becoming that role model.!
Don't let this very sad person have any power over how you feel. You look wonderful, you worked hard and made sacrifices to attain your goal and you should feel proud of yourself. Congratulations on your accomplishment!
I haven't read the replies from others but I would approach the person who whined about you having starved yourself and I would tell her that if she has anything she would like to discuss regarding your weight loss, she is welcome to discuss it with YOU directly, without going behind your back. Tell her you will be more than happy to address all her questions and concerns.
By the way, congrats on your weight loss. You look GRRREAT!
Definitely don't feel frustrated by this. I agree with everyone above who says that someone who is unable/unwilling to do what you have done -- eating sensibly and exercising -- is going to have to come up with SOME excuse why you were successful and they can't be, so they can sleep at night. Until she faces the reality of the situation, there's no sense in YOU getting frustrated over HER frustrations. I'm sure the other people you work with know you don't starve yourself, and more importantly, YOU know. Maybe someday she'll face that fact, or maybe not -- important to remember it's definitely not YOUR problem!
Ok, whining lady is whining. But why is gossiping lady sharing this with you? What's the point? To annoy you? She could have just not mentioned it and spared you some "Ugh!" moments.
I'm glad you are putting this behind you and moving on. Some people!
Honestly, the woman who was talking about you is likely very jealous first of all, and secondly, saying that you starved yourself gives her an excuse (to others and to herself) as to why she can't lose weight. YOU know you didn't starve yourself, and that is really all that matters. Additionally, even if in fact you DID starve yourself - it is of no one's business BUT YOUR OWN! I am so amazed and in awe of your success - do NOT let anyone take away one iota of your fabulous success!!
I haven't read the replies from others but I would approach the person who whined about you having starved yourself and I would tell her that if she has anything she would like to discuss regarding your weight loss, she is welcome to discuss it with YOU directly, without going behind your back. Tell her you will be more than happy to address all her questions and concerns.
By the way, congrats on your weight loss. You look GRRREAT!
I wouldn't do this unless you are 100% sure that the person who came to you about the gossip is telling the absolute truth. I've been burned too many times, confronting a person only to be told that the person who claimed to have defended me, was actually the person who initiated the gossip in the first place.
Whenever someone says "I defended you," and then lists all the scandalous things other people are saying about me, it raises huge red flags to me. I know human nature - When you defend someone to a hostile gossip, 99% of the time, the gossiper shuts up. If someone is able to tell you a whole bunch of horrible things that someone else said, they did not defend you, they participated wholeheartedly in the gossip (and there's a good chance they started it).
This make sense to me as well, and would cause red flags to come up for me too. Sometimes I find that people who come up to you to tell you what so-and-so said about you are being instigators. Where I came from, and maybe this term is common, we call this type of person a "sh!t disturber", someone who manipulates other people to create drama and cause trouble. I'm not saying your friend is doing this, but from what I've seen, that is sometimes the case.
As for your weight loss, congratulations, you look great, and yes, the other coworker is probably jealous and justifying the reasons she's not losing weight. At school I am learning the stages of change, and it sounds like she is in the "contemplation" stage -- she is admitting she needs to lose weight, and wants to do something about it, BUT: she has no time, it's too hard, she can't afford a trainer, etc, etc, etc.
Really frustrating!
) and didn't think that I starved myself at all.
