Body Image and Issues after Weight Loss - Has anyone 300+ female lost weight and had skin shrink back?




going2bskinny
01-27-2011, 02:26 AM
I am very curious to know if it is possible. I don't want surgery after my weight loss I'm going to try to do everything I can to see if it will go back on it's own. I know it will take time and a lot of work. A lot of people I see who were overweight and say they have extra skin are either still overweight or not toned enough or to a low enough body fat percentage that I have seen anyways. Just wondering has anyone done this? I am using oils and scrubs and taking baths using lofah and skin brushing before showers, after I lose my weight I want to try the derma roller also to see if that helps tighten it up or get rid of stretch marks has anyone tried that out with any kind of good results. When my weight gets down lower I am going to start high intensity interval training also and follow an even stricter diet. I will also be doing some fasting to make sure all the fat gets off my body.

Has anyone here had good results with their skin that has been overweight a long time and had alot of stretch marks I know some people have good skin and dont get alot of stretch marks and then their skin goes back pretty good but I have them like everywhere almost so I think it will be pretty bad unless I find something that helps I can't afford surgery. :(


nelie
01-27-2011, 07:27 AM
Hi!

I weighed a little less than you at my highest weight and I'm still considered overweight as I hover above 200. I will say that the first year was the absolute worst year.

I have loose skin on my upper arms, inner thighs and belly. I will say that loofah and what not is good exfoliation but it won't tighten the skin. The only thing that will tighten your skin is time and/or surgery. How much it tightens depends on genetics, how long you were morbidly obese and your age. I am actually amazed that things still improve gradually even though I've been at my current weight for 3 years.

I also wouldn't try fasting. I think the best thing you can do for your body is to keep it nourished. I do recommend all forms of exercise including weight lifting. I've been weight lifting for quite a few years along with other types of exercise.

I'd also recommend reading through our Skin Faq sticky in this forum. One perspective shared by those of us that have lost 100+ lbs is that the loose skin is better than being at the weight we were.

guamvixen
01-27-2011, 01:00 PM
I agree with nelie! Great answer! I've lost a total of 134 lbs, and as much as I would LOVE to NOT have loose skin, it's still there. On my belly, arms, thighs, and bum. But, I was still able to go from a size 20W to a size 2. And I currently weigh 116 lbs. I'm sure if I were to get the excess skin off, I'd probably weigh less, but that isn't an option for me.

HOWEVER...on the plus side, I just had a baby 8 weeks ago, and i didn't get any new stretch marks when my belly was growing!

You will be fine, don't let this discourage you. Sometimes I'm down on myself because I can never wear a bikini, and I get really insecure around my fiance', but I can still wear a one piece, where before I couldn't/wouldn't, and I would feel more insecure around my fiance' if I was still heavy. And most importantly, I can shop at any store! :)

Best of luck to you, and I'm looking forward to tracking your progress!


Dagny18
01-27-2011, 01:04 PM
I wouldn't fast either...I know I've read alot of articles on how food actually improves our body/beauty. Like low fat diets can affect the health of our nails, hair and skin leaving them dry...thus I always try to eat so much healthy fat in a day instead of cutting it all out. I think I've read that strawberries are good for our teeth?
Thus, I aim to eat keeping all of that in mind. I see food as nourishing my body and not only making it healthier but also beautiful!
And I started at 312 and am now 170...I still have loose skin too. Its been over a year since I've been around the 170s-180s. With clothes on, you would never know!
However, I have what I think could be skin or just cellulite on my butt & thighs. My stomach is pretty much flat but if I bend over it hangs down and you would realize I have extra skin there. Lastly I hate my arms. However, my arms were "bat wing" like when I was at my heaviest, so I don't really think weight loss really caused all of that.

going2bskinny
01-28-2011, 07:02 AM
thanks you guys I know I am hoping for something that probably won't ever happen just I'm so very depressed by it it makes me sick and suicidal really all day everyday pretty much because I know after I lose all this weight I am still going to hate how I look and no one is ever going to really like me.

It goes deeper than that someone in my life is really stressing me out over this issue if I don't look perfect afterwards I know he wont love me anymore. I know I shouldn't care and then he's not the one for me and all that, but I just can't take it I don't think. I don't have any friends in real life besides him and he is the only one I ever talk to if he leaves I am going to be crushed. And I know I am doomed for that to happen after all this but I just keep trying hoping that somehow I get some miracle or something. I know I won't. Makes me suicidal everyday worrying about this. feel like just getting it over with

nelie
01-28-2011, 08:11 AM
I know this isn't what you want to hear but I urge you to seek counseling. Love doesn't happen because someone has a perfect body and if it did, no one would be loved. I started dating my husband after I lost 70 lbs and I had a bunch of loose skin since I had just lost the weight. He loved me then, he loves me now. I was always a bit skeptical about having the kind of love I have with my husband, but we truly are partners. Please don't let one person dictate how you feel about yourself.

And yes, I've had relationships end where my heart was broken, shattered but if I had let those stop me, I wouldn't have found my husband. A relationship ending isn't the end of the world.

Lori Bell
01-28-2011, 08:46 AM
Oh wow. I'm not really quite sure how to say this without sounding preachy or "motherly", so please bare with me and know I am not trying to sound holier than thou. I am concerned for you.

Suicidal thoughts need to be addressed quickly. I'm just hoping you are using the word loosely as an expression, but it sound more severe than that. This guy you are so afraid to lose will be gone if you are so needy and clingy that he can't breath. Do you know what I mean? If you are constantly needing him to reassure you, and telling him you can't live without him and all the things that go with obsession, there is a good chance you'll lose him just because of your "neediness" and I guarantee you that it will have nothing to do with your weight. On the other hand some men want desperate women, and love to control them for their own narcissistic needs. So please keep that in mind. No person, man or woman is worth mental torment.

As far as loose skin. I've lost 193 pounds to date. The day I reached "goal" my skin didn't look so great. The longer I STAY at goal the better it has gotten. So far it's been almost 19 months since I reached goal and because I am continuing to nourish my body with nutritional foods and treating it with respect, (most of the time) my skin has responded positively. I look much better today than I did 19 months ago, even though I am the same weight.

So many people fear loose skin mostly because they have experienced it in past diet attempts, or they watch TV programs that depict rapid weight loss. But the sad truth is MOST people regain every pound they lose plus more, so the loose skin become a moot point, the least of your worries. MOST people don't give their bodies a chance to respond naturally. It takes time. A LOT of time. Super-morbid obesity is a life threatening disease, it kills people every day. And just like other diseases, there is no quick fix. Side effects, as in loose skin, may never heal completely, but thankfully loose skin will not kill you like morbid obesity will.

Hang in there, and if you are seriously thinking of suicide, please call your local suicide hot-line. Nothing is worth death. Hang in there honey.

Crystalx5
01-28-2011, 09:20 AM
He's not worth the emotional baggage. Please, please, please talk to somebody about this! I had an ex husband (he was the father of my two oldest kids). He was horribly abusive both mentally and physically- let me tell you- the MENTAL TORTURE is quite often WAY WORSE than the physical. I'm not saying he's mentally abusive to you, but that is the undertone I am getting from your message. If I am wrong- my deepest apologies. If it's you who feels insecure int he relationship because of how you look, then you need to talk to him and have him help make you feel better- that's what he is supposed to be there for. If not, LEAVE HIM. Start going out to meet new people and friends. It's hard, especially as adults. Do you work? Maybe there is someone there you could invite out for a coffee. I'm having huge body issues at the moment. My current hubby and I talk about it all the time. He can't always make me feel better (because of the stupid **** stuck in my head sometimes) but he TRIES SO HARD. If your man can't do that for you, then he is not worth your time wasted. I bet you are beautiful. I have lost a few people to suicide. It's the most selfish act a person can commit. Although you might not be thinking it at the time, there are a LOT of people out there who LOVE YOU just for BEING YOU!!! DON'T take YOU away from them. People sometimes show love in odd/weird ways, but I bet if you stop and think about it for a moment you will see there are many people who would be beyond heartbroken if you did something like that. I don't know where you live, but please call and talk to someone- is there a suicide hotline in your area? My brother is large guy, always looking for love. He gets too clingy to girls (once his one and only long term relationship ended), but somehow he still manages to find new ones lol. He plays online games, meets these people in real life. Also, he uses a free website I believe called plenty of fish- maybe that's a great way to start meeting new friends. Worry about YOU right now, no one else. Get your self esteem up. Make friends. Get out in the community, you'll be surprised to see how many people you can meet. Go join an aerobic swim class for overweight people. It just might help. Get pro active and you will start to feel better with yourself and life and realize that suicide should NEVER be an option. Please keep us all updated. I don't know you, but I CARE ((hugs))

Dagny18
01-28-2011, 01:51 PM
thanks you guys I know I am hoping for something that probably won't ever happen just I'm so very depressed by it it makes me sick and suicidal really all day everyday pretty much because I know after I lose all this weight I am still going to hate how I look and no one is ever going to really like me.

It goes deeper than that someone in my life is really stressing me out over this issue if I don't look perfect afterwards I know he wont love me anymore. I know I shouldn't care and then he's not the one for me and all that, but I just can't take it I don't think. I don't have any friends in real life besides him and he is the only one I ever talk to if he leaves I am going to be crushed. And I know I am doomed for that to happen after all this but I just keep trying hoping that somehow I get some miracle or something. I know I won't. Makes me suicidal everyday worrying about this. feel like just getting it over with

First I'd say I totally understand. I feel/experienced some of what your saying, though maybe not to that extent.
I was once 312 pounds and no one liked me. My boyfriend at the time and his family thought I should lose weight, get the lap band...I was pretty, smart but not good enough at that weight.
I wanted to change so I started into this without telling him. Nonetheless, a week later we fought and broke up....it was summer though and I stayed on my path. We went to the same college and that fall I went back lighter. I was maybe 250 and there was a little difference...guess what? He wanted me BACK! I told him NO! I kept dropping the weight all the while I was at college and he continually wanted us to try again, I never gave him that chance! At the time I graduated, he wore clothes that were bigger than mine, I am a large he was probably an XL...
Now, I am dating again and I am super scared I will never find someone accepting or understanding of my body and why it is the way it is. I see it as not normal.. I compare it to unrealistic pictures I see in magazines or people I see on television that don't represent the norm :(
But you know...I started working at this new place and I have met some beautiful women. I think they are my age (I am not sure really their age) but they are all probably the same size I started weight and size wise. But you know what? They are beautiful. I think they are beautiful...even at the size/weight I once was. The one girl has the most gorgeous color of hair. I am not sure if she highlights/dyes it or what, but it is the coolest shade of red and it just goes well with her complextion and face. The other girl has the prettiest eyes and I like it when she wears her hair down...(no I am straight, but I just notice these things ;))
Well, anyhow I work with skinny girls too, but I really think that even though they are not skinny, do not represent the beauty norm as shown on tv or magazines, I think they are gorgeous....
So, I think you should think about that. I still think about it...it shows me that my size or weight does not automatically make me ugly or beautiful but other characteristics that make me me can make me beautiful to others. It might be my hair color, eyes or other characteristic. Make sense?

Wildflower
01-28-2011, 03:27 PM
thanks you guys I know I am hoping for something that probably won't ever happen just I'm so very depressed by it it makes me sick and suicidal really all day everyday pretty much because I know after I lose all this weight I am still going to hate how I look and no one is ever going to really like me.

It goes deeper than that someone in my life is really stressing me out over this issue if I don't look perfect afterwards I know he wont love me anymore. I know I shouldn't care and then he's not the one for me and all that, but I just can't take it I don't think. I don't have any friends in real life besides him and he is the only one I ever talk to if he leaves I am going to be crushed. And I know I am doomed for that to happen after all this but I just keep trying hoping that somehow I get some miracle or something. I know I won't. Makes me suicidal everyday worrying about this. feel like just getting it over with

This guy may or may not still be around when you get to your goal weight...but even if he is, as you said, someone like that is not the guy for you. Please, please, please don't think he is the only one who will ever love you - he's absolutely not. There are plenty of guys out there who will love you for YOU, not what he wants you to be.

Trust me, you don't want to end up with someone who doesn't fully love you. I spent a decade with a jerky guy I knew didn't love me, but I loved him so I thought it was "good enough" since he stuck around. It wasn't, I deserved better. You might feel crushed at first, but you will get over it and move on and be so much happier! Please trust me on this one...8 months after I left that guy I met my fiancee. These things can and DO happen!

And as others have mentioned, try looking online at dating sites, etc. You never know who is out there looking for someone just like you. You are good enough NOW to have a guy love you, you don't need to wair until you are at your goal to see if that other guy is still around...

milmin2043
01-28-2011, 05:04 PM
I just wish I could reach right through this monitor and hug you. I really do. You have lost 81 pounds! My gosh, that is a huge accomplishment! If no one else has said it, you are doing a terrific job my dear. Every single one of us who has lost weight understands that every pound lost is a huge accomplishment. I am not just blowing smoke up your you-know-what either! You've done great.

I agree with other posters here that you should immediately call the suicide help line in your area if you are considering suicide. You deserve to live your best life, not to feel this way. There are people who can help you.

This person in your life, who you feel you will never be good enough for, sounds like a not very nice person. When a person loves you, they love you for everything that makes you YOU. You should be enjoying your journey and praising yourself every day for all of your terrific, hard-fought weight loss. You have chosen this guy to be in your life. Chose to NOT have him in your life. If he is not your biggest cheerleader and supportive of you 100%, why are you allowing him to take up your valuable time?

You wouldn't have been able to lose all of the weight that you've already lost without a huge amount of determination and will to change your life for the best. I feel that you are not giving yourself enough credit for the great person you are, no matter what your size. Maybe it would help to think about every positive quality you have. I'm not talking about qualities tied to your weight or appearance. Think about your heart, your soul, what you do for others, etc.

Please don't allow someone else to dictate how you feel about yourself. Why would you give someone else that much power over your life? I will be your friend. Please message me personally and I will do anything I can to help you. I am very concerned about you and for you. :hug:

going2bskinny
01-28-2011, 11:55 PM
thanks guys I'm really not clingy to him like that I don't let on about it. That's the problem I'm just holding it all in too scared to tell him for some reason he doesn't realize my body won't be perfect after I lose weight I try to tell him but I don't really because it is too embarrassing to talk about with him. I tell him I am depressed sometimes about my weight and body and he just says lose it and I tell him I am and he is just like well what is the problem then. I say my body won't be perfect after and he just says why not and I don't really want to say it so I don't tell him. I told him I have stretch marks now and he said where and I just said my sides, but they are like everywhere I don't want to tell him that, I'll never show my body to him. I don't know why he doesn't realize I won't go back perfect but he just doesn't and I really don't want to explain it all to him. He says my face is pretty and everything and when I lose weight I can wear a bikini and everything I won't never be wearing no bikini. I'm just so worried about telling him and for him to find out what my body really is gonna look like I know he will be grossed out and leave. everyday I am worried and sick about it I know I should just tell him but I just can't I keep hoping I won't have to and it will all just fix itself.

It is making it a lot harder for me to stick to my diet I do good for a while then the worry and depression and sickness makes me binge eat still sometimes then I try to starve myself for a few days or a week to make up for it. I know if he leaves maybe someone will actually like me but I don't think I will ever like myself ever either. I won't ever be comfortable with anyone enough to actually live with them and everything. Going to be alone and miserable don't really see the point in life much.

Thanks very much for all the nice replies means a lot to me you are all very nice. He is a very nice guy it's just my fear about it and his just not knowing about it I guess. I am too scared to tell him.

imperialistic
01-29-2011, 03:57 AM
Just my two bits: A friend and I both lost the same amount of weight (we went from 200ish to 140ish) and she had way more excess skin. I think partly the reason for that is because she lost it all within 4 months whereas I took around 16 months. I find that people who slowly take the weight off have less weight in the end as opposed to those who go on low-cal/fat diets. Of course, that doesn't mean that we should take forever but unfortunately, it looks looks like you can either have rapid weight loss or tight skin. Can't have our cake and eat it too... which is a bad metaphor since we can't have cake either :(
As for your insecurities, I agree with everyone here. I'm proud of you for losing 80 lbs and I know it's freakin tough. We all go through it on a daily basis- but losing weight won't give you the love that you're looking for. I thought being smaller was going to solve all my problems- I'd have the great figure, great job, great boyfriend, I'd be set... well, surprise surprise, it turns out that it didn't solve all my problems. I could have been just as happy at 200 lbs if I stopped to examine myself and my insecurities. Nelie is right, you should talk to someone (I wish I did while I was going through the process) and if it's worth anything, guys aren't half as picky as we think they are. Once the weight comes off, he'll be so amazed at how great you'll look, he'll ignore all the stretch marks and the other things that you'll drive yourself crazy over- that's almost a guarantee. No one is as hard on you as yourself... and other women. Unless they are fitness trainers, guys couldn't care less. And I know you don't believe me but you'll be okay with or without him and with or without the excess weight.
I wish I could give you a hug too. Please don't beat yourself up too much about it. God, if only it was all as easy as losing the weight, right?

nelie
01-29-2011, 07:49 AM
I will reiterate that I think you need to seek counseling. I never wanted to show guys I didn't trust my body so I pushed guys away for the most part. Until there was a guy I trusted and I definitely trusted my husband. Whenever I point out my loose skin, he says 'it is just a little bit, you are perfect how you are'. I know you are young but I think you'll understand that there are plenty of guys out there and they'll love you for you, not for you because you have some 'perfect' body. And I'll reiterate again, there is no such thing as a perfect body.

going2bskinny
02-01-2011, 04:33 AM
Thanks you guys I would like to get counseling but I am just not able to right now. I feel too dumb calling the suicide hotline, it would probably take me 10 years anyways to explain everything that is wrong, and I doubt anyone really wants to listen to that. Even if I was able to I would just have to call again the next day I'm sure. I can't call even if I wanted to, given the environment I'm in. Sorry I vented on here thanks for all the nice replies. I'm not doing that great on my diet anymore the past few days think I gained 10 lbs back. :(

rachael
02-01-2011, 09:47 AM
The people on suicide hotlines are there to listen. They volunteer their time and that is what they WANT to do with it. They want to listen and help you. Seriously.

You said you can't call given the environment that you are in. Can you go to the emergency room? Does your area have a crisis line? A lot of crisis places have places you can stay overnight if need be. The fact that you're sharing stuff on here indicates that you do want help. It's hard to think that anything will make anything better when you're in a dark place, but it does. Really, though, what is the worst that can happen if the help doesn't help? You're in the same situation you're in right now. I really hope you'll try and get some help.

Lori Bell
02-01-2011, 10:11 AM
Thanks you guys I would like to get counseling but I am just not able to right now. I feel too dumb calling the suicide hotline, it would probably take me 10 years anyways to explain everything that is wrong, and I doubt anyone really wants to listen to that. Even if I was able to I would just have to call again the next day I'm sure. I can't call even if I wanted to, given the environment I'm in. Sorry I vented on here thanks for all the nice replies. I'm not doing that great on my diet anymore the past few days think I gained 10 lbs back. :( I guess that is a way to keep your skin tight. :(

Food isn't going to help you in this situation. Food isn't going to fix your broken heart, or your loneliness, or your depression and definitely not your financial situation. Some how, some way you have the ability to get this under control and get help. You have lost 70 pounds, that is no easy task. MANY have tried to do that and have failed. YOU have done it, and you can keep doing it if you choose to. It is a choice. Fight for this, damn it. FIGHT FOR IT! You can turn this around and get physically and mentally in a good, (or better) place. Leave any and all baggage and excuses at the door and just get this ball rolling again. I'm begging you. :hug:

specialk85
02-01-2011, 09:49 PM
Hey...I just wanted to chime in...I have read in the past that it is indeed possible to lose the excess skin...it was an article regarding body fat % and muscle tone...even if the number on the scale is low your body fat % needs to be low enough for the skin to shrink back...I wish I could remember the link...but I just wanted to offer that little bit of insight that I have read its possible :)

With that being said...I do believe there is a much deeper issue here then just excess skin and I have to repeat others here in saying that finding someone to talk to is a good way to go. There are other support groups online as well that can assist you with these emotional issues. In order to be truely healthy you need to be healthy on the inside (mentally) and out (physically)...if you ever want someone to talk to please feel free to pm me :hug:

sisypheanme
02-01-2011, 10:20 PM
Going2bskinny,
I lost a lot of weight and yes I do have some loose skin on my arms, belly, and upper thighs. It has shrunk though! It is most noticeable to me and I doubt it is noticeable to others unless they were really looking. I think the key to having as little excess skin as possible is by weight training and exercise. I have to be very careful with what I do because I have asthma but even walking and lifting some light weights can help. Regardless, you will be healthier weighing less, even with excess skin.
If your man does not stand by you after your successful weight loss, then I highly doubt it was a relationship that would stand well at all. When you lose weight YOU WILL GAIN MORE CONFIDENCE...and that is what you need. You are a valuable person and need to treat yourself that way.
Hugs,
Sissy

going2bskinny
02-02-2011, 03:25 AM
I'm really sorry you guys thanks for all the nice replies it really helped. Was having a very bad week I guess. And a bit of a pity party. I'm not giving up my diet or anything I weighed myself today and I was only 5lbs more so I think I maybe only gained a couple pounds and the rest is water weight. So that is good I was binging on bad food for a few days there, I'm getting back on track now. I know it's really not an option to give up and stop anymore even after I lose weight so that won't be happening.

I read that too specialk85 I really hope it is possible to work it off in the end I am really going to try and see what happens.

I'd really like some diet buddies if anyone wants to be mine, I don't have anyone to talk to about it who are actually nice to me. I do have very low self esteem I never had a nice friend or even any family that was not mean to me. Not just mean horrible. It is really hard doing it all on my own while everyone around me puts me down, treats me bad and tries to sabotage it, among other things. But I am still doing my best. I really don't talk about my life much to anyone at all, it is just shock value for anyone that hears it, just trying to get this weight off and get out of here in the shortest amount of time possible.

Thanks everyone for the messages it really helped, good to see nice people really do exist for a change :hug:

beccabutterfly
02-03-2011, 12:07 AM
I agree about the counseling or hotline....
but I'd also like to ask you,is your body perfect now?
he's with you now right? so maybe you're more worried about perfection than he is,and he is just uninformed about weightloss.
must be some reason he's there...maybe it's YOU. ;)

fillupthesky
02-03-2011, 02:56 AM
going2bskinny- i'm sorry that you're having a hard time. but like everyone has said- focus on the good. you've lost a lot of weight! you're doing something really good for yourself. something that a lot of don't fully grasp- and you're doing it, day after day.
also, i know you're really worried about what your body will look like after, but try not to focus on that right now. try to focus on being healthy, and treating your body with kindness and respect by putting in the fuel it needs and giving it activity :)
be in the moment. spend your energy working on yourself and your self esteem, seek counseling...you'll deal with the "what ifs" of the future when they come.
again, you're doing a great job, keep your head up, and be in the here and now.

much love:hug:

martinimouse
02-21-2011, 11:43 AM
When we have such a massive amount of weight to lose, it is so hard to know what to expect at goal. When I was younger, I lost 120 pounds and while I got to my goal weight, it seemed to take about a year for everything to settle, for my body to take a shape that stayed. The remaining fat seemed to shift, the loose skin firmed up.

I am much older now and I panicked when I had lost about 70 pounds and saw the sagging skin! But amazingly, it has gotten less loose over the last few months. It gave me hope that eventually I will be able to deal with the realities of my body and be ever so grateful that I am no longer dealing with the issues of obesity.

Relationships, body image are all tied up in the weight loss journey and I think that we all have to step back a bit and explore our feelings about it. I know that I lost weight so fast before that I felt like i had suddenly stepped out into the spotlight and didn't know how to handle the attention I received. I was use to being invisible by being obese. Take it one step at a time, getting to know your body, building up ideas about how you will want to dress, what you want to accomplish when obesity is no longer a hindrance.

Because you have anxiety over the future with what may happen, I think you should find a support group. Have you considered Overeaters Anonymous? There are no fees and there will be people there that will know what you are going through and they set you up with a sponsor so that you have one on one support too.

While I am not in the situation to attend one regularly (I am on the road) I am considering attending a weekly meeting when I am home for a month so that I can have support when I feel vulnerable to sneak eating when alone for so long.

Hope you seek the help you need. We ALL need support in the weight loss journey, we ALL need to work through the changes that happen. Often we find that what we fear most never happens.

ParadiseFalls
02-21-2011, 12:31 PM
Everyone else has already given you great advice, and I agree that you need to talk to someone about the emotional side. We're all here for you, too, of course.

About your boyfriend, though...you say you know he'll leave if you don't look perfect after you lose the weight. Do you believe he loves you now and will stop loving you if you don't look perfect later? Or do think he doesn't love you now and will only start loving you if you look perfect? Sometimes men say things they think are encouraging and just come out wrong. A few years ago when I was on a diet, my boyfriend said something about a bikini, but it was because he thought that's what I wanted. Not because he cared. Is it possible your boyfriend is just trying to encourage you?

Forgive me if I'm way off base and he is emotionally abusive. I just thought I'd throw that out there because I have absolutely horrific self-esteem, like you, and for a long time I thought my boyfriend had to hate my body despite all the evidence to the contrary.

Hart
02-21-2011, 08:45 PM
I had more loose skin last year than this year! Some of it did bounce back over time (stomach and boobs got better, arms slightly but more due to building muscle to "fill" it in a bit). I will always have loose skin, unless I have surgery. I have learned to love my body however and to accept it for what it is instead of looking at it like a punishment for all those years of treating it badly. It WILL get better, as in- your outlook.

going2bskinny
02-24-2011, 10:38 AM
Thanks you guys yes he is really nice it is mostly me and my horrible self esteem and depression I think. I can't really get to any meetings right now either. Thanks for sharing your stories with me I really appreciate it. I guess I'll worry more about it later when I get more closer to my goal weight. I still have a long way to go. Thanks everyone you are all so nice :hug: