Weight Loss Support - Why am I not losing anything!!!??




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HermersSis
11-16-2010, 11:35 AM
I've been doing 40-50 minutes of cardio for the past few days. That burns a lot of calories, I check on one of those sites. And I have been sticking to my diet.

The scale won't move! Not one ounce! What's the problem??????

When I just dieted the weight was coming off. Why is it like when I exercise nothing happens....?


sacha
11-16-2010, 11:40 AM
It can take several weeks to see a shift in the scale, for some it can take a month or more. What you are doing is great, but to see the results, it will take much longer than a few days. Keep at it!

gottadoit2010
11-16-2010, 11:45 AM
Patience is a virtue! :) It sucks, but that's one of the keys to the game.


asparagus4sale
11-16-2010, 11:47 AM
I think there is this assumption that your body immediately reacts to any changes. That's not necessarily true. Why do we assume that the cupcake we ate at 10pm the night before explains the 1 pound weight gain the next morning? Your body has to digest it and then store or expel it - that is not a 5 minute operation. Chances are your weight may still be a result of your eating a couple of days ago and the changes you are making now will show up in a couple more days.

cornellchick
11-16-2010, 11:50 AM
Sometimes exercise can cause temporary weight gain due to water retention, etc. If you keep it up and are eating well too, then don't worry - the weight WILL come off... just be patient! :)

beerab
11-16-2010, 12:02 PM
You also might be consuming too little now that you are burning an additional 500 calories? How many calories are you eating a day?

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 12:09 PM
I swear this makes no sense whatsoever!

Every time I DIET. The weight FLIES OFF.
When ever I add EXERCISE. NOTHING HAPPENS.

How can this make sense?
I dropping the exercise mostly and relying on diet, but I just thought it'd be nice to exercise as well, to tone up and get heart healthy.

I just want a logical explanation as to why my body takes DIET as lose weight and Diet AND EXERCISE...hmmm nah, weight stays on. :?:

carter
11-16-2010, 12:13 PM
You've only added the exercise for a few days, right? That is simply not enough time to see the difference.

Your body will take a week or two - perhaps longer - to adjust to a big change in the workload you give it. Try to be a little more patient, keep the exercise up for a month, and then see how your weight loss is.

The time scale for this process is just longer than several days. No way around that.

sacha
11-16-2010, 12:17 PM
Your body isn't going to defy physics - give it a lot more time, keep the right calories, and it will work. Either you aren't giving it enough time (a few days is nothing - it can take weeks, MONTHS, to see solid results) or perhaps you are eating more. But it will happen.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 12:30 PM
You also might be consuming too little now that you are burning an additional 500 calories? How many calories are you eating a day?

Probably around 1000, not trying to eat low. But I'm eating all this vegetarian stuff and I'm just not to hungry lately.

I am an avid calorie counter too so I can average the numbers pretty fast and I average them out with a higher average. So If I think it was around 160 calories for breakfast. I just average out 200. I've been eating in the 1000-1200 area.

Nola Celeste
11-16-2010, 12:31 PM
There is at least one logical explanation for why exercising heavily over the past few days has created a "stick" on the scale: water retention.

What happens when you get a bruise, strain, or bump? The tissue in the immediate area swells with fluid as part of your body's "repair kit." What happens when you work out? You often get sore because you're creating micro-tears in your muscle fiber (don't worry, that's not a bad thing, it's part of the building process that gives you strength). All those little micro-tears mean your body's going to divert some fluid to the area, meaning that a few days of heavy exercise often reads as more poundage on the scale.

We can't control what our bodies do; we can only control what we put into our bodies and the amount of work we get out of them. Focusing solely on results--especially when those results are condensed into one number which may or may not represent fat loss--sometimes leads to disappointment over stuff we can't control.

Try focusing on the things you DO control: staying with your plan, being patient, being realistic about your goals, exercising for greater health instead of just as a means to weight loss. Focus on the "NSVs"--non-scale victories--like fitting better in your clothes, walking farther, lifting more weight, finding a new food you like.

Losing weight is a marathon, not a sprint. Looking at the results of a few days' changes is like saying that you'll never be able to finish all 26 miles because you can only see three blocks ahead.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 12:33 PM
Your body isn't going to defy physics - give it a lot more time, keep the right calories, and it will work. Either you aren't giving it enough time (a few days is nothing - it can take weeks, MONTHS, to see solid results) or perhaps you are eating more. But it will happen.

I'm not eating more and it should not takes WEEKS to lose an ounce. I'm sorry, that's ridiculous. My body is defying logic because exercise seems to stabilize my weight for some crazy reason. But waiting weeks and months to see a change is not an option. If you're going to lose the recommended 1 lousy pounds a week at the least you should be burning a little over an ounce a day.

Like, I said, I'm quitting the exercise. I'm just trying to find a feasible reason why exercise makes me not lose weight.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 12:35 PM
There is at least one logical explanation for why exercising heavily over the past few days has created a "stick" on the scale: water retention.

What happens when you get a bruise, strain, or bump? The tissue in the immediate area swells with fluid as part of your body's "repair kit." What happens when you work out? You often get sore because you're creating micro-tears in your muscle fiber (don't worry, that's not a bad thing, it's part of the building process that gives you strength). All those little micro-tears mean your body's going to divert some fluid to the area, meaning that a few days of heavy exercise often reads as more poundage on the scale.


That makes sense.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 12:36 PM
You've only added the exercise for a few days, right? That is simply not enough time to see the difference.

Your body will take a week or two - perhaps longer - to adjust to a big change in the workload you give it. Try to be a little more patient, keep the exercise up for a month, and then see how your weight loss is.

The time scale for this process is just longer than several days. No way around that.

Then, I won't exercise.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 12:36 PM
Sometimes exercise can cause temporary weight gain due to water retention, etc. If you keep it up and are eating well too, then don't worry - the weight WILL come off... just be patient! :)

Lol, I missed the quick answer. Thanks.

sacha
11-16-2010, 12:39 PM
I'm not eating more and it should not takes WEEKS to lose an ounce. I'm sorry, that's ridiculous. My body is defying logic because exercise seems to stabilize my weight for some crazy reason. But waiting weeks and months to see a change is not an option. If you're going to lose the recommended 1 lousy pounds a week at the least you should be burning a little over an ounce a day.

Like, I said, I'm quitting the exercise. I'm just trying to find a feasible reason why exercise makes me not lose weight.

Well, I wish you luck with your weight loss journey but a little bit more patience will go a long way because when you start to lose more and head closer to goal, it's not going to happen as fast. Plateaus occur, you may even gain one week, lose a little the next - or none at all at times.

The difference between the maintainers and the ones who are endlessly in a cycle of gain, lose, gain, quit is one thing - patience and acceptance that there will be highs & lows in the journey. I've been around 3FC for a while and I maintained for 6 years - without patience, it does NOT happen.

Iianae
11-16-2010, 12:42 PM
We can ALL totally understand your frustration but you seem awfuly defensive with every explanation given to you. Why? You gain some weight when you introduce exercise...it happens. You don't have to exercise if you don't want to but frankly why would you STOP? You said yourself you wanted to be healthier and have a stronger healthier heart...isn't that worth waiting a few weeks for your poor body to adjust to the new activity? Seriously...what good is being thin if the first time you fall you break a hip or worse?

My vote? Have patience and CONTINUE to exercise...but in the end it's your call...we'll all be here to help motivate you.

Good luck

Macomom
11-16-2010, 12:47 PM
I empathize with you.
I have been working out at the gym 3 times a week (with all my heart) for an hour with a personal trainer. I have not seen the scale go down at all. (3 weeks in a row...)
However, today I did the buttons up on a shirt that I have not worn in a year. You will get confirmation that you are shrinking :)
I am taking a leap of faith. It is my heartfelt desire to get this weight off, but in the end the exercise will matter- it will help your metabolism, your energy and your weight loss.
It is counter intuitive to keep exercising when the reward is so delayed- it is almost scarey. I wish you luck- please update us when the scale finally drops :)

Nola Celeste
11-16-2010, 12:47 PM
Why choose not to exercise instead of continuing to exercise, then seeing where you stand in a month once your body's adjusted to a higher activity level? You may have a week or so of being stuck, but as your body adjusts (and as your mind adjusts to seeing the same annoying number for a week :) ), you'll lose more rapidly with exercise than without it.

Burning more calories equals losing more fat. That equation is as much of a sure thing as Pythagoras's theorem. It may not always look like you're burning more weight in the short term, but you'll definitely burn more fat.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 12:51 PM
Well, I wish you luck with your weight loss journey but a little bit more patience will go a long way because when you start to lose more and head closer to goal, it's not going to happen as fast. Plateaus occur, you may even gain one week, lose a little the next - or none at all at times.

The difference between the maintainers and the ones who are endlessly in a cycle of gain, lose, gain, quit is one thing - patience and acceptance that there will be highs & lows in the journey. I've been around 3FC for a while and I maintained for 6 years - without patience, it does NOT happen.

I have no problem with patience. There's a big difference between patience and knowing something isn't going to work the way you want it to.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 12:53 PM
Seriously...what good is being thin if the first time you fall you break a hip or worse?

I'll be in love. I'd rather have a life and be thin with a broken hip, then stay trapped in my room fat and waiting. Still. I just wanted an explanation as to WHY that happens. Several people told me, some did not.

Eliana
11-16-2010, 12:54 PM
Your body isn't going to defy physics - give it a lot more time, keep the right calories, and it will work. Either you aren't giving it enough time (a few days is nothing - it can take weeks, MONTHS, to see solid results) or perhaps you are eating more. But it will happen.

I know it's hard to hear, but she's right. ;)

I was saying all the same things when I came here. I was broken. There was something wrong with me. I could lose weight with diet but exercise stalled me out. I wasn't like other women. I packed on muscle like no tomorrow.

I was wrong.

Weight loss is 80% diet and 20% exercise. Exercise because it is good for you. Know that when you lose weight as much as 40% of what you lose could be muscle instead of fat. Lift weights to RETAIN muscle. That equation right there explains why adding exercise messes with the scale, at least in my mind. To me, the scale slows down about 40% because I'm losing FAT, not muscle. I'm ok with that. But I had to research that and fully understand that before I could accept it.

And that recommended 1-2 pounds per week is utter hogwash. ;) I prefer to recommend 4-8 pounds per month. It's the same thing but far more accurate! Some of us do lose routine 1-2 pounds every week, but very, very few of us. I have a tendency to lose big in one week and stall the other three. I started weighing daily and have been tracking daily weight loss for a good nine months or so and have a really good record of my body doing this.

Take heart, pull up some patience and settle in for a the long haul. Keep exercising! It's so good for you! But the scale does not accurately reflect what you are doing here and now. It's the trend you want.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 12:55 PM
Why choose not to exercise instead of continuing to exercise, then seeing where you stand in a month once your body's adjusted to a higher activity level? You may have a week or so of being stuck, but as your body adjusts (and as your mind adjusts to seeing the same annoying number for a week :) ), you'll lose more rapidly with exercise than without it.

Burning more calories equals losing more fat. That equation is as much of a sure thing as Pythagoras's theorem. It may not always look like you're burning more weight in the short term, but you'll definitely burn more fat.

Because, I don't have a lot of time to goof around. I have to do what I know works. I've tried adding exercise several times and I did it perfectly this time and the same thing keeps happening. I can't waste anymore time.

beerab
11-16-2010, 01:03 PM
So you are eating 1000 calories a day AND exercising? That's why it's stopped. If you are going to exercise I'd add more calories- you already shouldn't be hitting under 1200 calories and you weigh 255- you could probably exercise and eat 1800 calories a day and still lose.

Remember it's not always about eating as little as possible, your body needs to get enough nutrients and calories to want to let go of the fat.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 01:05 PM
I wish you luck- please update us when the scale finally drops :)

Now, that I'm going to stop exercising everyday it shouldn't take too long.
Thank you. :)

Nola Celeste
11-16-2010, 01:06 PM
I have no problem with patience. There's a big difference between patience and knowing something isn't going to work the way you want it to.

What is it you know isn't working the way you want it to, though? You haven't exercised enough to know if it's working as intended; you've seen a mini-stall on the scale as your body hangs onto a little more fluid, but you haven't seen what a solid month of it will do for you.

Believe me, I can empathize with wanting the weight off quickly. Over the past month, I have wished I could just get a kitchen knife and carve the excess off my haunches like I'd do to a pork roast. I've called myself things that I would hate another person for saying to me. I've even had dreams in which people DO say them to me, so even my subconscious mind is a Mean Girl.

You control how well you construct a plan, how faithfully you adhere to it, how much you exercise. You do not control genetics, age, the precise number on the scale, or the speed at which your body decides to let go of its fat. If it gets too frustrating to look at the stuff you can't control, refocus yourself and set your sights on the stuff you can control.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 01:09 PM
So you are eating 1000 calories a day AND exercising? That's why it's stopped. If you are going to exercise I'd add more calories- you already shouldn't be hitting under 1200 calories and you weigh 255- you could probably exercise and eat 1800 calories a day and still lose.

Remember it's not always about eating as little as possible, your body needs to get enough nutrients and calories to want to let go of the fat.

I thought of that as a possibility. I've read I shouldn't go under 1050-1200. So I don't know. There are a lot of conflicting sources out there.

I can not fathom eating 1800 calories WHILE eating healthy. I don't even know how to physically do that without eating too much.

It's kind of crazy too. Once I stopped being a calorie **** and just kept track of what I ate, I went back and did the calories and they're naturally low. It seemed impossible to stay so low when I TRIED though. Weird huh? Mentality is a powerful thing.

What is it you know isn't working the way you want it to, though? You haven't exercised enough to know if it's working as intended; you've seen a mini-stall on the scale as your body hangs onto a little more fluid, but you haven't seen what a solid month of it will do for you.

Believe me, I can empathize with wanting the weight off quickly. Over the past month, I have wished I could just get a kitchen knife and carve the excess off my haunches like I'd do to a pork roast. I've called myself things that I would hate another person for saying to me. I've even had dreams in which people DO say them to me, so even my subconscious mind is a Mean Girl.

You control how well you construct a plan, how faithfully you adhere to it, how much you exercise. You do not control genetics, age, the precise number on the scale, or the speed at which your body decides to let go of its fat. If it gets too frustrating to look at the stuff you can't control, refocus yourself and set your sights on the stuff you can control.

I can't control much. I sit in a room all day.
Being able to control how much food I eat does absolutely nothing for me. None of those simple things do anything for me because if they don't prove they're helping me get out of this godforsaken room I couldn't care less about them. I said, somewhere, I've tried adding exercise multiple times and this always happens. I'm either going to have to go off of anecdotal evidence or empirical and I'm choosing empirical. I like exercising, but it's not helping me at this point.

Nola Celeste
11-16-2010, 01:46 PM
We all know ourselves best, and I definitely believe we need to take our idiosyncracies into account. Empirical evidence is always important to consider.

I look forward to hearing about your progress! :)

mkroyer
11-16-2010, 02:16 PM
i thought your response to Sacha was very disrespectful.
She (and everyone) was trying to help, in a logical, objective manner

fitkristi
11-16-2010, 02:30 PM
Just so you know, we started out at the exact same weight, and are nearly the same height and I stalled out in the mid-250's too - for over a month. It had nothing to do with the exercise I was doing, nothing to do with what I was eating. It was just a stabilization period for my body.

That said, don't give up on exercise. It's good for you!

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 02:32 PM
i thought your response to Sacha was very disrespectful.
She (and everyone) was trying to help, in a logical, objective manner

That's too bad. It's not.
I didn't swear at her, call her a name, yell at her or anything "disrespectful". I disagreed and said I think it's ridiculous to wait weeks to lose an ounce. Any medical professional would have to look into my health if I couldn't lose an ounce of weight in weeks with diet and exercise.
So I don't know what you want from me, but I'm not in the mood. I wasn't being disrespectful. You have no idea of the intent or emotion behind my LETTERS.

Just so you know, we started out at the exact same weight, and are nearly the same height and I stalled out in the mid-250's too - for over a month. It had nothing to do with the exercise I was doing, nothing to do with what I was eating. It was just a stabilization period for my body.

That said, don't give up on exercise. It's good for you!

That's weird. You stayed at 250 for a month?

nelie
11-16-2010, 02:39 PM
The scale doesn't measure just fat, it measures fat, water, tissues, muscle, bone, etc. Our bodies are composed mostly of water. Our fat cells after they empty also fill with water which means that we can lose fat and stay the same weight. It is also why many people report the whoosh effect where they don't lose or don't lose very much and then lose a lot at once.

I have to say that there were many weeks while I was actively losing weight with a food deficit and exercise that I didn't lose a pound on the scale. I ended up with a major whoosh after that though. I think it is normal to plateau for weeks.

Also, at your weight, I would recommend upping your calories to something closer to 1600 calories.

fitkristi
11-16-2010, 02:39 PM
That's weird. You stayed at 250 for a month?

I gained and lost the same 2-3lbs for over a month, yes. I weigh myself daily, though, so there were normal fluctuations with bloating, etc. I didn't start to go back on a downward trend until after about 5 weeks. I just stuck with it, and knew that I was doing what I needed to do.

In my opinion, I don't think you're eating enough calories to support any intense cardio at your weight. I was eating at least 1500-1600 calories at that weight & activity level when I began losing again. What cardio are you doing?

midwife
11-16-2010, 02:42 PM
That's too bad. It's not.
I didn't swear at her, call her a name, yell at her or anything "disrespectful". I disagreed and said I think it's ridiculous to wait weeks to lose an ounce. Any medical professional would have to look into my health if I couldn't lose an ounce of weight in weeks with diet and exercise.
So I don't know what you want from me, but I'm not in the mood. I wasn't being disrespectful. You have no idea of the intent or emotion behind my LETTERS.

Some people's weight loss occurs in a nice, predictable trend. Other people lose in more of a stair-step pattern. Finding the optimal balance of nutrition and movement can take some practice and experimentation. Clearly you have an idea in mind for what works for you, which is great. But when you ask a question on a forum like this, you will get a lot of varied opinions, some of which are based on years of experience.

It is true that typed responses on the internet can be interpreted differently by different people, so let's all try to take a nice deep breath together and remember that this forum is about support.

Eliana
11-16-2010, 02:43 PM
i thought your response to Sacha was very disrespectful.
She (and everyone) was trying to help, in a logical, objective manner

:yes: ...as much as I'm itching to just stay out.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 02:43 PM
The scale doesn't measure just fat, it measures fat, water, tissues, muscle, bone, etc. Our bodies are composed mostly of water. Our fat cells after they empty also fill with water which means that we can lose fat and stay the same weight. It is also why many people report the whoosh effect where they don't lose or don't lose very much and then lose a lot at once.

I have to say that there were many weeks while I was actively losing weight with a food deficit and exercise that I didn't lose a pound on the scale. I ended up with a major whoosh after that though. I think it is normal to plateau for weeks.

Also, at your weight, I would recommend upping your calories to something closer to 1600 calories.

Logical. Wow you lost a lot of weight so far!
Why do fat cells fill with water? O_o

I can not eat that much an eat healthy. I don't know why. In fact, I think I reached this critical point where I'm too worried to eat. You know that sound when the clock is ticking on 24? I hear that, all the time.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 02:44 PM
Some people's weight loss occurs in a nice, predictable trend. Other people lose in more of a stair-step pattern. Finding the optimal balance of nutrition and movement can take some practice and experimentation. Clearly you have an idea in mind for what works for you, which is great. But when you ask a question on a forum like this, you will get a lot of varied opinions, some of which are based on years of experience.

It is true that typed responses on the internet can be interpreted differently by different people, so let's all try to take a nice deep breath together and remember that this forum is about support.

Thanks. I like opinions but not if I can't give my own back.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 02:47 PM
I gained and lost the same 2-3lbs for over a month, yes. I weigh myself daily, though, so there were normal fluctuations with bloating, etc. I didn't start to go back on a downward trend until after about 5 weeks. I just stuck with it, and knew that I was doing what I needed to do.

In my opinion, I don't think you're eating enough calories to support any intense cardio at your weight. I was eating at least 1500-1600 calories at that weight & activity level when I began losing again. What cardio are you doing?

Jumping roping or running in place for about 40 to 50 mins. I really can not physically eat a lot right now. I've been trying to hold down my breakfast for two hours, on an off.

fitkristi
11-16-2010, 02:49 PM
Are you ill? I don't understand why you can't hold food down?

nelie
11-16-2010, 02:49 PM
Logical. Wow you lost a lot of weight so far!
Why do fat cells fill with water? O_o

I can not eat that much an eat healthy. I don't know why. In fact, I think I reached this critical point where I'm too worried to eat. You know that sound when the clock is ticking on 24? I hear that, all the time.

I have read that it is a temporary state in part of emptying the fat cell. Also, someone else mentioned it but your muscles also need water as part of their recovery process so they can also fill with water.

You might want to look at something like adding almonds or avocados. They contain healthy fats but can also give you some extra calories during the day.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 02:51 PM
Are you ill? I don't understand why you can't hold food down?

I'm very stressed. I have IBS and when I get freaked out my stomach bothers me.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 02:52 PM
I have read that it is a temporary state in part of emptying the fat cell. Also, someone else mentioned it but your muscles also need water as part of their recovery process so they can also fill with water.

You might want to look at something like adding almonds or avocados. They contain healthy fats but can also give you some extra calories during the day.

Interesting.
I have some avocado here. I didn't know they had a lot of calories, hmm.

fitkristi
11-16-2010, 02:53 PM
Ahhhh, yes. I have IBS too so I understand! All I ask is that you give it a little more time - maybe try adding in some fun exercise. Running in place for a hour sounds sooooooo boring to me!! Do you have other exercise options?

beerab
11-16-2010, 02:55 PM
I can not eat that much an eat healthy. I don't know why. In fact, I think I reached this critical point where I'm too worried to eat. You know that sound when the clock is ticking on 24? I hear that, all the time.

I'm not sure what you are eating but I think it's very easy to eat 1500 calories and eat healthy.

I eat pretty healthy and my calories are usually around 1500/day.

Yesterday my breakfast was 1 whole wheat bagel thin with 1 egg and 2 laughing cow wedges (I was hungry I usually do 1 wedge) and that was over 300 calories.

My lunch wasn't as healthy cuz I didn't plan ahead but it was a lunchable and around 350 calories.

I had a snack of peanut butter with celery was around 200 calories.

Dinner was whole grain pasta with peas and alfredo sauce: 500 calories

That made 1400 calories (I think it came out to 1385 yesterday).

That wasn't a perfect day for me but I'm able to get in 1400-1500/day.

It's harder if you are vegetarian but protein is the easiest way to up your calories IMO.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 02:56 PM
Ahhhh, yes. I have IBS too so I understand! All I ask is that you give it a little more time - maybe try adding in some fun exercise. Running in place for a hour sounds sooooooo boring to me!! Do you have other exercise options?

Actually, I love it. I just watch TV that makes me laugh (which makes me happy amped) or MMA/Reality TV competitions (which makes me motivated amped). I was strength training with a band. I thought maybe that might of had something to do with the not losing anything aspect.

fitkristi
11-16-2010, 03:00 PM
Muscles need water to rebuild - so its entirely possible that you're retaining water while your body recovers. Give it time!

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 03:00 PM
I'm not sure what you are eating but I think it's very easy to eat 1500 calories and eat healthy.

I eat pretty healthy and my calories are usually around 1500/day.

Yesterday my breakfast was 1 whole wheat bagel thin with 1 egg and 2 laughing cow wedges (I was hungry I usually do 1 wedge) and that was over 300 calories.

My lunch wasn't as healthy cuz I didn't plan ahead but it was a lunchable and around 350 calories.

I had a snack of peanut butter with celery was around 200 calories.

Dinner was whole grain pasta with peas and alfredo sauce: 500 calories

That made 1400 calories (I think it came out to 1385 yesterday).

That wasn't a perfect day for me but I'm able to get in 1400-1500/day.

It's harder if you are vegetarian but protein is the easiest way to up your calories IMO.

Actually, I do eat a lot of vegetarian stuff. I'm not a vegetarian I just, don't like to eat too much meat. I average a 200 cal breakfast, snack...maybe an apple. Lunch is usually a salmon burger, or veggie burger/meatballs/nuggets with a side of broccoli and cauliflower. Dinner is usually a mixture of stir fried (I don't use oils) veggies and some grilled chicken or fish.

I don't variate too much. I'm not a picky eater, but I know what I like, if you get what I mean.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 03:02 PM
Muscles need water to rebuild - so its entirely possible that you're retaining water while your body recovers. Give it time!

My bf told me to not exercise for a couple of days. I WANT to exercise. I really like it because it helps with my mood. I didn't exercise today and I feel cruddy, but I'll try not exercising for a couple of days and maybe my muscles will repair and stop being jerks, or whatever is happening.

Actually my boyfriend suggested I exercise sporadically.

19Deltawifey
11-16-2010, 03:06 PM
Didn't read any of the other post sorry

If you are doing the cardio at a steady pace this could be the reason why you aren't losing weight. Try adding some intervals and lift heavy weights if you haven't already. Also make sure you are getting enough protein

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 03:10 PM
Didn't read any of the other post sorry

If you are doing the cardio at a steady pace this could be the reason why you aren't losing weight. Try adding some intervals and lift heavy weights if you haven't already. Also make sure you are getting enough protein

NP, heavy weights? That's a different one. Isn't that for building muscles?
Ooooo storm. What is that sign about?

pammi2003
11-16-2010, 03:18 PM
You are awfully defensive in this thread. They are only trying to help.
Maybe you should reconsider to help elevate your mood a bit ;)

And, your calorie burn comes from muscles. The more muscle you have. The more you burn. Weight lifting is a MUST. I went from curling 2lbs to 20lbs.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 03:25 PM
You are awfully defensive in this thread. They are only trying to help.
Maybe you should reconsider to help elevate your mood a bit ;)

And, your calorie burn comes from muscles. The more muscle you have. The more you burn. Weight lifting is a MUST. I went from curling 2lbs to 20lbs.

Actually, a pound of muscle only burns a handful of calories and to lose weight and gain muscle you have to do two opposite things. You can't do both effectively at the same time.

And this defensive thing is really getting awfully annoying. I don't know what the heck you're talking about and at this point I don't even care anymore. I've thanked and held conversations with multiple people in this thread but somehow that makes me defensive. Whatever.

pammi2003
11-16-2010, 03:34 PM
Actually, a pound of muscle only burns a handful of calories and to lose weight and gain muscle you have to do two opposite things. You can't do both effectively at the same time.

And this defensive thing is really getting awfully annoying. I don't know what the heck you're talking about and at this point I don't even care anymore. I've thanked and held conversations with multiple people in this thread but somehow that makes me defensive. Whatever.

There is also the after burn effect (or EPOC) when it comes to weight lifting.

Good luck on your weight loss journey!

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 03:41 PM
There is also the after burn effect (or EPOC) when it comes to weight lifting.

Good luck on your weight loss journey!

I don't know what you're talking about.

Thanks.

Kaonashi
11-16-2010, 03:50 PM
Your muscles are getting little "rips" in them from exercising, and they knit themselves back together stronger and smaller. Muscle also weighs more than fat so the scale might not budge for a while but you'll see results elsewhere--like your clothes getting looser, or being able to fit into something 1 size down, feeling better emotionally, etc.

I think a common mistake is to get hung up on what the scale says and not how we FEEL or look. The scale doesn't tell us how much muscle we've gained vs the fat we had, and it sure doesn't do much to elevate our moods, lol. If you want to stop exercising in favor of dieting that's your decision, but exercise has a lot of benefits that have nothing to do with losing weight IMO.

joyfulloser
11-16-2010, 03:56 PM
In the end we will all be skinny (actually skeletons...really:o)...

With that said, what matters is our health. For many years I've focused on "how I look" and that is why I went from skinny to fat...from fat to skinny..and repeat...several times:(

What matters most is how you feel..so if you feel good when you exercise..then DO THAT...

I agree with some of the posters who say up your calories...adding nuts, beans, lentils, heck...a protein bar (atkins choco-peanut butter for me;)) it would be pretty easy to add another 400-500 healthy cals to your diet.

Exercise is not only heart healthy, but its nature's perfect mood stabilizer...releasing natural endorphins and giving us an overall sense of well being. In addition, it keeps us firm. Remember when Oprah first lost all that weight by DIETING on that liquid diet? All that was left to her was hanging flesh, sagging skin and she looked extremely AGED!:o Exercise keeps our skin tight while we loose, and builds muscle to reshape us...it is invaluable...and I could go on and on about the benefits...

In any event, if you decide to stop exercising...I hope you get back to it soon. Who knows...maybe you need a break? Only you can decide. I strongly believe if you continue with regular exercise and up your calories a little bit as advised above, AND GIVE YOURSELF 2 more weeks....you'll be happily surprised.:)

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 03:57 PM
Your muscles are getting little "rips" in them from exercising, and they knit themselves back together stronger and smaller. Muscle also weighs more than fat so the scale might not budge for a while but you'll see results elsewhere--like your clothes getting looser, or being able to fit into something 1 size down, feeling better emotionally, etc.

I think a common mistake is to get hung up on what the scale says and not how we FEEL or look. The scale doesn't tell us how much muscle we've gained vs the fat we had, and it sure doesn't do much to elevate our moods, lol. If you want to stop exercising in favor of dieting that's your decision, but exercise has a lot of benefits that have nothing to do with losing weight IMO.

Like what?

pammi2003
11-16-2010, 04:01 PM
I don't know what you're talking about.

Thanks.

http://www.weightlossforall.com/epoc.htm

Here ya go.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 04:01 PM
In any event, if you decide to stop exercising...I hope you get back to it soon. Who knows...maybe you need a break? Only you can decide. I strongly believe if you continue with regular exercise and up your calories a little bit as advised above, AND GIVE YOURSELF 2 more weeks....you'll be happily surprised.:)

If I had a year to lose the weight I would have no problem with that, but I don't and people don't realize that. Those two weeks mean a lot to me. What am I supposed to do if they go by and still no change? I might as well start on being a skeleton because it's over for me.

And Oprah is old. :P

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 04:04 PM
http://www.weightlossforall.com/epoc.htm

Here ya go.

That says cardio or weight lifting. I would assume that if you wanted to lose weight with this in mind you'd veer towards cardio and not weight lifting.

SouthLake
11-16-2010, 04:05 PM
I may be a broken record but I'm going to echo what a lot of these ladies have said.

Try upping your calories. When I lost weight a few years ago I was starting from around 185. I was eating 1500 calories and exercising for an hour each day. Scale barely moved for a month. Dropped down to 1200. Scale didn't move at all for three weeks. Went to the doc to get all checked out- she encouraged me to up my calories to 1750. I did it, and started consistently losing 2+ lbs per week. (if only I could have kept it up then!) Our bodies need a certain amount of calories to work efficiently. Even though logic says lower calories = faster weightloss, it doesn't usually work out that way for most of us. Try adding a small snack like a handful of nuts, or some avocado to your stirfry. A tablespoon of olive oil with your stirfry, or an extra egg to your morning eggs. Don't look at it as trying to add 500 calories at once, but 50-100 calories here and there.

A few weeks ago, I started adding pretty good cardio into my plan. My weightloss slowed down to a crawl. I added weights and I gained weight! I went up two pounds even though I hadn't been eating more. I got those off, but then didn't lose any weight, and sometimes bounced up, for over two weeks. I almost quit. Good thing I didn't- I would have missed a 4.5 pound loss. Since then, I have consistently lost more weight on weeks that I have exercised than weeks that I haven't. Exercise causes our bodies to retain water. It sucks, but, quitting exercise will help you feel like you're "losing" more weight in the next week or two. Continuing to exercise will help you lose more weight (and even more importantly-inches!) over the rest of your life.

pammi2003
11-16-2010, 04:05 PM
I know you want to lose weight quickly. But the best way to keep the weight off is to do it gradually.
Also, can you live on just 1000 calories a day?
By adding exercise, you can eat more and have more variety.

That says cardio or weight lifting. I would assume that if you wanted to lose weight with this in mind you'd veer towards cardio and not weight lifting.

Cardio does promote faster weight loss than weight training. But I know you have said that it's not giving you the results you want. What about adding High Interval Training to your routine?

This is what I do.

Mon, Wed, Fri= I lift weights (1 hour a day)
Tues, Thurs, Sat= Cardio (Around 2 hours a day)

I know I do a lot, But I am currently training for a marathon next year.

Macomom
11-16-2010, 04:17 PM
You need to get this all accomplished in under a year?

pammi2003
11-16-2010, 04:18 PM
I may be a broken record but I'm going to echo what a lot of these ladies have said.

Try upping your calories. When I lost weight a few years ago I was starting from around 185. I was eating 1500 calories and exercising for an hour each day. Scale barely moved for a month. Dropped down to 1200. Scale didn't move at all for three weeks. Went to the doc to get all checked out- she encouraged me to up my calories to 1750. I did it, and started consistently losing 2+ lbs per week. (if only I could have kept it up then!) Our bodies need a certain amount of calories to work efficiently. Even though logic says lower calories = faster weightloss, it doesn't usually work out that way for most of us. Try adding a small snack like a handful of nuts, or some avocado to your stirfry. A tablespoon of olive oil with your stirfry, or an extra egg to your morning eggs. Don't look at it as trying to add 500 calories at once, but 50-100 calories here and there.

A few weeks ago, I started adding pretty good cardio into my plan. My weightloss slowed down to a crawl. I added weights and I gained weight! I went up two pounds even though I hadn't been eating more. I got those off, but then didn't lose any weight, and sometimes bounced up, for over two weeks. I almost quit. Good thing I didn't- I would have missed a 4.5 pound loss. Since then, I have consistently lost more weight on weeks that I have exercised than weeks that I haven't. Exercise causes our bodies to retain water. It sucks, but, quitting exercise will help you feel like you're "losing" more weight in the next week or two. Continuing to exercise will help you lose more weight (and even more importantly-inches!) over the rest of your life.


I agree!

Also, when I started to add weight training to my schedule, my scale did not move for one whole month!! You bet I was mad. Especially when the first 2 months I was losing weight on the rate of 2-3lbs a week.

I almost quit. But I decided to stick with it longer and see if I had any results. Well, after one whole month of no weight loss, the scale moved down 4 lbs on the 5th week!

Weight training broke my plateau :carrot:

cornellchick
11-16-2010, 04:20 PM
If I had a year to lose the weight I would have no problem with that, but I don't and people don't realize that.

I am wondering... what is your hurry? Losing weight and keeping it off requires a life change, and it takes time... this is a journey with twists and turns, not a linear sprint.

Those two weeks mean a lot to me. What am I supposed to do if they go by and still no change?

It isn't about what you're supposed to do - it's about what you want to do, about what you WILL do. What will you do? Give up? Or keep going?

If you have set a goal to weigh X pounds by a certain date, I have to tell you that you might be disappointed. We can't control what the scale says. But we CAN control diet and exercise.

Best wishes on achieving your goals. :hug:

sacha
11-16-2010, 04:30 PM
You (and me, as well, in the past) seem to have a very all or nothing approach to this whole weight loss thing. I know you've said in the past that you were a long-time dieter and the extremes didn't work before. So, how will the extremes suddenly be working now? You're still eating far below your weight loss calorie range (and even below your BMR), you are going to stop exercising (even if it is detrimental to your health) because of a few days that didn't show major loss, and you say you MUST lose fast.

So, how is this all or nothing approach going to work this time? I wish you the best by the way, I just have never seen such extreme approaches work in the long-term.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 04:39 PM
I may be a broken record but I'm going to echo what a lot of these ladies have said.

Try upping your calories. When I lost weight a few years ago I was starting from around 185. I was eating 1500 calories and exercising for an hour each day. Scale barely moved for a month. Dropped down to 1200. Scale didn't move at all for three weeks. Went to the doc to get all checked out- she encouraged me to up my calories to 1750. I did it, and started consistently losing 2+ lbs per week. (if only I could have kept it up then!) Our bodies need a certain amount of calories to work efficiently. Even though logic says lower calories = faster weightloss, it doesn't usually work out that way for most of us. Try adding a small snack like a handful of nuts, or some avocado to your stirfry. A tablespoon of olive oil with your stirfry, or an extra egg to your morning eggs. Don't look at it as trying to add 500 calories at once, but 50-100 calories here and there.

A few weeks ago, I started adding pretty good cardio into my plan. My weightloss slowed down to a crawl. I added weights and I gained weight! I went up two pounds even though I hadn't been eating more. I got those off, but then didn't lose any weight, and sometimes bounced up, for over two weeks. I almost quit. Good thing I didn't- I would have missed a 4.5 pound loss. Since then, I have consistently lost more weight on weeks that I have exercised than weeks that I haven't. Exercise causes our bodies to retain water. It sucks, but, quitting exercise will help you feel like you're "losing" more weight in the next week or two. Continuing to exercise will help you lose more weight (and even more importantly-inches!) over the rest of your life.

You make a lot of sense but I'm way too scared of wasting time. It took you a long time to figure it out right? I don't have that kind of time.

I know you want to lose weight quickly. But the best way to keep the weight off is to do it gradually.
Also, can you live on just 1000 calories a day?
By adding exercise, you can eat more and have more variety.

I don't want to eat more. I'm eating like that naturally (oopsie* typo). I don't have much of an appetite these days.

You (and me, as well, in the past) seem to have a very all or nothing approach to this whole weight loss thing. I know you've said in the past that you were a long-time dieter and the extremes didn't work before. So, how will the extremes suddenly be working now? You're still eating far below your weight loss calorie range (and even below your BMR), you are going to stop exercising (even if it is detrimental to your health) because of a few days that didn't show major loss, and you say you MUST lose fast.

So, how is this all or nothing approach going to work this time? I wish you the best by the way, I just have never seen such extreme approaches work in the long-term.

No, I never said that. I said I tried dieting with exercise before and it never worked.

My extreme diets always worked, they're just hard to stay on. I ate 500 cals a day for a month and lost 20 lbs, never gained it back either. I just can't do that because I was in a daze for a month. I KNOW my diet works. I didn't understand why exercise wasn't helping it work more. But evidently that has something to so with the muscles needing water. I'm going to go back to exercising. But I'm going to hold off for awhile.

I am wondering... what is your hurry? Losing weight and keeping it off requires a life change, and it takes time... this is a journey with twists and turns, not a linear sprint.


I want to be with my boyfriend.

It isn't about what you're supposed to do - it's about what you want to do, about what you WILL do. What will you do? Give up? Or keep going?

I'm not going to give up, not at all.

If you have set a goal to weigh X pounds by a certain date, I have to tell you that you might be disappointed. We can't control what the scale says. But we CAN control diet and exercise.

Best wishes on achieving your goals. :hug:


It's more like a range. I want to be around 170-180 by June.
More like, I have to be. :(

nelie
11-16-2010, 04:48 PM
That says cardio or weight lifting. I would assume that if you wanted to lose weight with this in mind you'd veer towards cardio and not weight lifting.

I believe both cardio and weight lifting are important. I actually favor weight lifting over cardio myself. Muscle does increase your metabolism and you lose muscle as you lose weight. Best way to maintain your muscle is weight lifting.

Throughout my weight loss, I have struggled with cardio but I love weight lifting so I tend to focus more on weight lifting.

Nola Celeste
11-16-2010, 04:49 PM
I don't mean to offend or step on your toes here, but what happens if your body doesn't cooperate with you and you don't lose the specified amount of weight in the specified amount of time? Do you give up? Does your family disown you, your boyfriend leave you, your boss fire you?

Also, if you're giving yourself a year in which to lose the weight, why are you sweating the past few days of scale immobility so much? You deserve to take it a little easier on yourself, because it sounds like you're working hard and highly motivated. :)

Someone who needs to lose weight to have a scheduled surgery or who wants to look svelte for his/her wedding, for example, has good reason to set a "lose by" date. Deadlines can be motivational. They can also be tyrannical and set people up for doing dangerous things or developing disordered eating in an attempt to do what they have told themselves they MUST do.

Again, I don't want to butt into your business, but the all-or-nothing thinking, the difficulties you're having with going out and living life (I inferred that from your post about being stuck in your room, but correct me if I'm wrong), and the sense of dire urgency you seem to have about weight loss might be reasons to seek some professional advice. Whether that's counseling to deal with the feelings of "I MUST get skinny NOW" or a dietician to help you realize your year-long goal, someone who can take a good, hard, objective look at the overall picture can be a major help.

Oh, and Oprah may be "old," but when you consider that eventually, everyone's options boil down to "old" or "dead," aging doesn't seem like such a bad thing. (I can only hope to be so rich at her age, too!) :D

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 04:50 PM
I know you want to lose weight quickly. But the best way to keep the weight off is to do it gradually.
Also, can you live on just 1000 calories a day?
By adding exercise, you can eat more and have more variety.



Cardio does promote faster weight loss than weight training. But I know you have said that it's not giving you the results you want. What about adding High Interval Training to your routine?

This is what I do.

Mon, Wed, Fri= I lift weights (1 hour a day)
Tues, Thurs, Sat= Cardio (Around 2 hours a day)

I know I do a lot, But I am currently training for a marathon next year.

I was going to reply to that part before but I guess you deleted the other post and added this. Lifting weights for an hour?! O_o
That sounds like a lot. My bf, suggested I change it up like that and work out sporadically, not on a schedule nor everyday.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 04:56 PM
I don't mean to offend or step on your toes here, but what happens if your body doesn't cooperate with you and you don't lose the specified amount of weight in the specified amount of time? Do you give up? Does your family disown you, your boyfriend leave you, your boss fire you?

Also, if you're giving yourself a year in which to lose the weight, why are you sweating the past few days of scale immobility so much? You deserve to take it a little easier on yourself, because it sounds like you're working hard and highly motivated. :)

Someone who needs to lose weight to have a scheduled surgery or who wants to look svelte for his/her wedding, for example, has good reason to set a "lose by" date. Deadlines can be motivational. They can also be tyrannical and set people up for doing dangerous things or developing disordered eating in an attempt to do what they have told themselves they MUST do.

Again, I don't want to butt into your business, but the all-or-nothing thinking, the difficulties you're having with going out and living life (I inferred that from your post about being stuck in your room, but correct me if I'm wrong), and the sense of dire urgency you seem to have about weight loss might be reasons to seek some professional advice. Whether that's counseling to deal with the feelings of "I MUST get skinny NOW" or a dietician to help you realize your year-long goal, someone who can take a good, hard, objective look at the overall picture can be a major help.

Oh, and Oprah may be "old," but when you consider that eventually, everyone's options boil down to "old" or "dead," aging doesn't seem like such a bad thing. (I can only hope to be so rich at her age, too!) :D

My boyfriend will leave me, yes.
Then I won't be able to leave my terrible home life.

Actually, I don't have a year. I'd feel A LOT better if I had a year but I only have until June to get at least (ugh) to 180.

I don't really think anyone I see can help with this. It just it what it is.

And lol, I only mentioned her being old because I think her skin and age lead to her weight loss making her look not too great. I'm hoping my skin will be a little more bouncy.

luckymommy
11-16-2010, 04:57 PM
To the OP, I don't believe you're trying to offend anyone...I believe you're just trying to get information. However, based on how most people on here post, your comments may be misinterpreted. When posting in black and white print, it's nice to add some comments to help people understand your intentions. So, rather than saying that what someone says is ridiculous, you may say, "I really do appreciate your comment, but I find it hard to believe that x, y and z is true." See what I mean? That way, you could let the person know that you're not insulting them but don't necessarily agree with their comment. I have to be honest that when I first read your comment, I found it quite harsh but then I saw a trend in your posts that indicated that this is just how you communicate....at least in print.

Also, I know you meant your comment of "Oprah is old" as a joke, but we have members here of all ages and that can be an insensitive comment as well.

I hope you don't slam me, but I really am just trying to help. As Rodney King once said, "Can't we all just get along?"

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 04:57 PM
I believe both cardio and weight lifting are important. I actually favor weight lifting over cardio myself. Muscle does increase your metabolism and you lose muscle as you lose weight. Best way to maintain your muscle is weight lifting.

Throughout my weight loss, I have struggled with cardio but I love weight lifting so I tend to focus more on weight lifting.

I prefer weight lifting. I've often said I wish I were a guy then I could pump weights all day. But I've always read and heard that if you want a lean body you have to focus more on cardio.

JayEll
11-16-2010, 04:59 PM
Hi. You do sound awfully frantic, angry, and stressed. Did you know that stress can cause your weight loss to stall and even reverse?

So that's one of the benefits of exercise. It reduces stress. :)

Another benefit is that it strengthens your muscles and gets them in shape so that they can burn fat. Muscle is the primary fat-burning tissue.

Another benefit is that it helps stabilize blood glucose, so if you are diabetic or pre-diabetic, exercise can reverse that.

It also helps lower blood pressure.

I think that if you are going to exercise, you'll need to increase calories. Otherwise, you won't have enough nutrients to support the exercise. I also don't think it's a good idea to eat below 1200 for an extended period of time. You can't get enough nutrients for sleeping that way, let alone exercising.

I would suggest that you take a moment or two to chill out and breathe a bit, and then evaluate what help you might get and where. A registered dietitian might be able to give you a program on which you could succeed. A counselor or therapist might be able to help you feel less desperate and unhappy. :)

I hope you succeed! Lots of people have given you feedback here. It seems like you don't like what anyone has said, so we're sort of at a loss... :dunno:

Jay

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 05:01 PM
To the OP, I don't believe you're trying to offend anyone...I believe you're just trying to get information. However, based on how most people on here post, your comments may be misinterpreted. When posting in black and white print, it's nice to add some comments to help people understand your intentions. So, rather than saying that what someone says is ridiculous, you may say, "I really do appreciate your comment, but I find it hard to believe that x, y and z is true." See what I mean? That way, you could let the person know that you're not insulting them but don't necessarily agree with their comment. I have to be honest that when I first read your comment, I found it quite harsh but then I saw a trend in your posts that indicated that this is just how you communicate....at least in print.

Also, I know you meant your comment of "Oprah is old" as a joke, but we have members here of all ages and that can be an insensitive comment as well.

I hope you don't slam me, but I really am just trying to help. As Rodney King once said, "Can't we all just get along?"

Alright, thank you. No I wasn't trying to be harsh or anything. That is just how I type because I type like I would talk but I wasn't trying to put anyone down there's just a lack on infliction.

Sorry about the Oprah comment. I was basing her being old on her skin elasticity. Not a dig.

nelie
11-16-2010, 05:03 PM
I prefer weight lifting. I've often said I wish I were a guy then I could pump weights all day. But I've always read and heard that if you want a lean body you have to focus more on cardio.

I would say what you read was wrong from my experience. I don't have a lean body, yet. I do know many weight lifters who do though. There are many ladies on this forum who have lifted heavy weights throughout their weight loss and have resulted in very lean bodies.

ValRock
11-16-2010, 05:04 PM
Ok, wait a second... I'm not trying to butt into your business but since you put it out there... your boyfriend will leave you if you don't lose weight? Is this really the kind of person you want to be with?

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 05:06 PM
Ok, wait a second... I'm not trying to butt into your business but since you put it out there... your boyfriend will leave you if you don't lose weight? Is this really the kind of person you want to be with?

Yes, it's not his fault. I lied to him. He never said he would leave. I know he would leave me or at least would want to.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 05:07 PM
I would say what you read was wrong from my experience. I don't have a lean body, yet. I do know many weight lifters who do though. There are many ladies on this forum who have lifted heavy weights throughout their weight loss and have resulted in very lean bodies.

With increasing weights? I usually use a band. I don't think I made that clear.

ValRock
11-16-2010, 05:08 PM
Yes, it's not his fault. I lied to him. He never said he would leave. I know he would leave me or at least would want to.

I really don't understand this at all... but best of luck with your goals.

If I'd put a timeframe on my weight loss with these kinds of consequences I would have set myself up for miserable failure....

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 05:10 PM
I really don't understand this at all... but best of luck with your goals.

If I'd put a timeframe on my weight loss with these kinds of consequences I would have set myself up for miserable failure....

Thanks....

Nola Celeste
11-16-2010, 05:16 PM
Wow...has he actually said that to you? "Lose weight or I walk?" If he hasn't, you may be assuming a bit much about his attitude toward your weight. He sounds like he's trying to be supportive in talking with you about it--that's at odds with the callousness of a "lose it or lose me" ultimatum.

It sounds like you have a lot of worries already if you have a difficult home life. Additional pressure--whether it's from your own belief that you'll be boyfriendless if you don't lose or from his telling you so (although that'd be cruel)--sure doesn't help, I'll bet. I'm sorry things are so rough right now and hope that they'll improve, not just on the weight front but in general.

And if your boyfriend hasn't actually issued such an ultimatum, don't assume he would. The good ones are happy to see you whether you're skinny, fat, or anything in between. :)

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 05:18 PM
Wow...has he actually said that to you? "Lose weight or I walk?" If he hasn't, you may be assuming a bit much about his attitude toward your weight. He sounds like he's trying to be supportive in talking with you about it--that's at odds with the callousness of a "lose it or lose me" ultimatum.

It sounds like you have a lot of worries already if you have a difficult home life. Additional pressure--whether it's from your own belief that you'll be boyfriendless if you don't lose or from his telling you so (although that'd be cruel)--sure doesn't help, I'll bet. I'm sorry things are so rough right now and hope that they'll improve, not just on the weight front but in general.

And if your boyfriend hasn't actually issued such an ultimatum, don't assume he would. The good ones are happy to see you whether you're skinny, fat, or anything in between. :)

Okay, you're being really nice so I'm going to try to explain the whole story. But there's so many conflicting things going on here right now and half the people in here think I'm being a jerk and I'm not trying to and it's giving me a headache, so I'm just can I PM you if you don't mind. Yours are disabled.

vdander24
11-16-2010, 05:23 PM
You have every right to find the best way for you to be more healthy and lose weight. I just have one question.
What happens with your goals the day after your event?
For me, there is an event coming up that has served as inspiration for me to start, but I have 100lb still to lose. I have had to look past the one event, so I can really be as healthy as possible long-term.
In the end it is your body, your health, your choice. I hope the information you have received can help with your decision. Good luck.

Hey!. Just read some more posts. For what its worth, your plan seems aggressive but achievable, even if you chose to give yourself some "testing" time. (I hope so, because I am aiming for approximately the same range... see my numbers. )
Not cool enough to pm yet, but would love to chat some more. I probably can't give any advice, but would love to learn what you are doing.
Again, Good luck!

nickilaughs
11-16-2010, 05:34 PM
I was going with others on the not enough calories. If you cut too many calories your body changes to "starvation mode" and decides to hoard all the calories you do consume as well as drastically lower your metabolic rate.
The best combination of exercise that I have learned is cardio with interval training. That means...jog at a slow pace for a minute and a half. Then do 30 seconds of just full on running as fast as you can. And repeat.
Weights are an excellent edition, because while they do build muscle, they also help burn fat and replace that fat with muscle. Muscle also does require more calories daily as opposed to fat.
If it's been more than a month with no reduction in weight, I would then contact a physician to perform thyroid testing to see if your thyroid is causing issues.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 05:40 PM
You have every right to find the best way for you to be more healthy and lose weight. I just have one question.
What happens with your goals the day after your event?
For me, there is an event coming up that has served as inspiration for me to start, but I have 100lb still to lose. I have had to look past the one event, so I can really be as healthy as possible long-term.
In the end it is your body, your health, your choice. I hope the information you have received can help with your decision. Good luck.

I don't really know. If I don't lose enough it'll still be good because I would have lost a lot. I wanna try to lose 10-15 lbs a month. Higher end but I don't think it's waaaayyy out there.

Nola Celeste
11-16-2010, 05:44 PM
Sadly, my PMs are disabled because I'm still a relative newbie. I'm sorry; I can't enable 'em for a bit yet. :(

I don't want to poke my nose where it doesn't belong, but if it's an online or long-distance thing, I understand--I watched a friend do something similar and then panicked when the time came to meet the guy in person. (Theirs was a happy ending, by the way; they both fudged a little on their weight, had a good laugh about it, and lived happily ever after on his apple farm in upstate NY. )

People generally lie for one of two reasons: to conceal some rotten thing they did or to make themselves look better. The former is vastly worse than the latter and you haven't done that, I gather. He knows you're working on your weight and sounds supportive; a guy like that is unlikely to be superficial. Give him some credit and yourself some slack. :)

As for people thinking you're a jerk, I'm sure forum regulars have read the same stuff I have about how as much as 70% of what people write in e-mails or on message boards can get misinterpreted. I was once accused of "aiming for Dorothy Parker, but coming off like Nancy Grace." (That one stung a little. :D)

Someone in a previous post (was it JayEll?) made a really good point: stress can cause weight gain or retention and diets can cause stress, so you're kind of caught in a feedback loop here. I'm glad you're deciding to pick up exercise at a later date if not right away; I'm finding it's a huge stress relief.

vdander24
11-16-2010, 05:48 PM
I know that feeling. Hang in there! :-)

rockinrobin
11-16-2010, 05:50 PM
.

cherrypie
11-16-2010, 05:51 PM
if you have only been exercising a couple days it is likely just water retention. Sore muscles are swollen muscles. Doesn't mean you aren't still losing fat though. Just that the water is hiding the loss. Also you've lost a lot of weight. Your body is going to go through some plateaus and adjustments. You aren't going to lose weight at the same rate all along.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 05:51 PM
I was going with others on the not enough calories. If you cut too many calories your body changes to "starvation mode" and decides to hoard all the calories you do consume as well as drastically lower your metabolic rate.
The best combination of exercise that I have learned is cardio with interval training. That means...jog at a slow pace for a minute and a half. Then do 30 seconds of just full on running as fast as you can. And repeat.
Weights are an excellent edition, because while they do build muscle, they also help burn fat and replace that fat with muscle. Muscle also does require more calories daily as opposed to fat.
If it's been more than a month with no reduction in weight, I would then contact a physician to perform thyroid testing to see if your thyroid is causing issues.

Interval exercise sounds intriguing. I don't think there's anything wrong with my thyroid though. I don't know how it goes exactly, but it was checked years ago.

You're really pretty, btw.

rockinrobin
11-16-2010, 05:53 PM
The fastest, while still being healthiest way to lose weight, is to stick with your plan. No cheat days, no cheat meals.

And you don't have to do anything extreme - just stick with your plan.

The best way to stick with your plan is to make it stick-able to. Adhering to a calorie allotment of 1200 - 1400 calorie of highly nutritious, satiating foods -lots of veggies, proteins, some fruits. Walking 30- 45 minutes a day. Use that resistance band every other day. Given your starting weight, nothing more is needed.

It's all in the consistency.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 06:01 PM
Sadly, my PMs are disabled because I'm still a relative newbie. I'm sorry; I can't enable 'em for a bit yet. :(

I don't want to poke my nose where it doesn't belong, but if it's an online or long-distance thing, I understand--I watched a friend do something similar and then panicked when the time came to meet the guy in person. (Theirs was a happy ending, by the way; they both fudged a little on their weight, had a good laugh about it, and lived happily ever after on his apple farm in upstate NY. )

People generally lie for one of two reasons: to conceal some rotten thing they did or to make themselves look better. The former is vastly worse than the latter and you haven't done that, I gather. He knows you're working on your weight and sounds supportive; a guy like that is unlikely to be superficial. Give him some credit and yourself some slack. :)

As for people thinking you're a jerk, I'm sure forum regulars have read the same stuff I have about how as much as 70% of what people write in e-mails or on message boards can get misinterpreted. I was once accused of "aiming for Dorothy Parker, but coming off like Nancy Grace." (That one stung a little. :D)

Someone in a previous post (was it JayEll?) made a really good point: stress can cause weight gain or retention and diets can cause stress, so you're kind of caught in a feedback loop here. I'm glad you're deciding to pick up exercise at a later date if not right away; I'm finding it's a huge stress relief.

I think you're getting the jist...gist...? I don't know how to spell that. :D
I did lie for the latter. It's just because it came natural because this weight thing is always temporary in my head. I came sorta clean but aside form old pictures he doesn't know the full on brunt of it. I'm hoping to be an acceptable fat when the time comes I get to see him so I don't have to go to that bad place of failure because I know what he likes. He's a Marine (yeah, that doesn't help!) and he's really sweet. He had just seen something on exercise (because I texted him distraught this morning) and called me promptly to try to help me and has been texting me all day about it. He IS supportive but, I just can't be this big when I get to see him. He deserves a better looking chick than fugly me. I don't want to be settled for either. That's kind of worse than being dumped....:(

Ouch on the Nancy Grace. It just bothers me that people think I'm being rude and disrespectful when I'm not trying to at all. I'm stressed, but I'm not attempting to be mean in anyway. I am naturally blunt though. I get right to the point.

Yeah, it seems like everything is against you when you're trying to lose weight. It's so weird. :?: I wish I could stress myself into being skinny!

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 06:02 PM
The fastest, while still being healthiest way to lose weight, is to stick with your plan. No cheat days, no cheat meals.

And you don't have to do anything extreme - just stick with your plan.

The best way to stick with your plan is to make it stick-able to. Adhering to a calorie allotment of 1200 - 1400 calorie of highly nutritious, satiating foods -lots of veggies, proteins, some fruits. Walking 30- 45 minutes a day. Use that resistance band every other day. Given your starting weight, nothing more is needed.

It's all in the consistency.

I agree with you, consistency.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 06:03 PM
I know that feeling. Hang in there! :-)

Thank you!

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 06:03 PM
if you have only been exercising a couple days it is likely just water retention. Sore muscles are swollen muscles. Doesn't mean you aren't still losing fat though. Just that the water is hiding the loss. Also you've lost a lot of weight. Your body is going to go through some plateaus and adjustments. You aren't going to lose weight at the same rate all along.

Yeah, I know. :(
This is weird though. I've read about a lot of this stuff and this water retention thing seems to be common knowledge. Never heard of such a thing. Thank you!

rockinrobin
11-16-2010, 06:08 PM
Yeah, it seems like everything is against you when you're trying to lose weight. It's so weird. I wish I could stress myself into being skinny!

Everything is not against us. Except ourselves perhaps.

WEight loss is not an instant gratification type thing. It takes time to nail down a plan. To find foods that you like that are lower calorie. To start implementing good, lasting habits. For those habits to become ingrained in us.

WEight loss is not meant to be uncomfortable and painful. It does though take some time to switch from not so good habits to good ones.

It's not about some quick fix. It's about learning to eat in a mature, responsible manner. Which for decades I didn't do. I was responsible with everything else - but not my food. It was time for a change.

Slow down. Breathe. You can't *fix* this over night. You've got to take it one day at a time, making the most of each day. Patience, perseverance, brutal honesty, determination - that's what's needed to get the job done.

pammi2003
11-16-2010, 06:26 PM
I was going to reply to that part before but I guess you deleted the other post and added this. Lifting weights for an hour?! O_o
That sounds like a lot. My bf, suggested I change it up like that and work out sporadically, not on a schedule nor everyday.


No. I didn't delete my post.
Yes. An hour weight lifting is a lot, but like I said, I am in training mode right now :)

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 07:43 PM
No. I didn't delete my post.
Yes. An hour weight lifting is a lot, but like I said, I am in training mode right now :)

Yeah, I know. :)
Actually, a number of my posts combined into one huge posts. I don't know if that's done automatically or if a mod is here and did it for us. Fine be me though. :)

rachael
11-16-2010, 08:52 PM
How old are you? You said you can't leave yout bad home life without him? Unless you are under 18, you absolutely can and you don't need to rely on a man to rescue you. Your posts sound very fatalistic, which makes me worry about what you will do if you slip up. Not saying that you will, but if.

Can you just come clean with your boyfriend? You may be pleasantly surprised. You seem to be projecting your ideas onto his actions without giving him a chance to prove otherwise to you. It sounds like you are assuming he will leave you if he finds out you are fat, but unless he says exactly that, you don't know.

Good luck.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 09:18 PM
How old are you? You said you can't leave yout bad home life without him? Unless you are under 18, you absolutely can and you don't need to rely on a man to rescue you. Your posts sound very fatalistic, which makes me worry about what you will do if you slip up. Not saying that you will, but if.

Can you just come clean with your boyfriend? You may be pleasantly surprised. You seem to be projecting your ideas onto his actions without giving him a chance to prove otherwise to you. It sounds like you are assuming he will leave you if he finds out you are fat, but unless he says exactly that, you don't know.

Good luck.

I'm over 18. I really can't. I don't make any money and any job I find now will not be enough for me to leave home. I either have to get to go with him or wait until I finish my BA, then find a job with my BA.

I can, but I'm really scared to. He knows I want to lose weight, but really not that much.

nelie
11-16-2010, 09:19 PM
With increasing weights? I usually use a band. I don't think I made that clear.

My experience is with weight lifting ie barbells, dumbbells and body weight exercises. The girls at my gym are amazing and can lift lots of weight (well over 100 lbs, some over 200 lbs), do pullups, pushups, etc. Bands are good, I like bands but they aren't my preferred exercise.

19Deltawifey
11-16-2010, 09:31 PM
No. I didn't delete my post.
Yes. An hour weight lifting is a lot, but like I said, I am in training mode right now :)

Off Topic but Pammi, your arms look amazing! I Love lifting weights also and time seems to fly when I'm lifting weights.

Princess of the KING
11-16-2010, 09:35 PM
I can not fathom eating 1800 calories WHILE eating healthy. I don't even know how to physically do that without eating too much.



I wanted to say that I weigh 216 and have to eat between 1,600 and 1,800 calories to lose. I would highly suggest eating more calories. It has helped me imensely. Keep working out it will pay off in the end. It isn't magic- You didn't gain the weight overnight so it will in turn take time for it to go away.

Weight training has helped me a lot too. I do weights at least 2 times a week. It helps build muscle! (I have noticed sometimes I don't lose on the scale but rather in inches)
Another thing is you need to lose the weight for you not a man. Girl you don't need a man! If he doesn't love you for who you are then that's not fair to you! Take your time with the weight loss it isn't healthy to lose that much so fast.
Lastly.....GOOD LUCK! Keep us updated :)

Princess of the KING
11-16-2010, 10:08 PM
Okay so I just read all the posts...I know I need a life...anyhow.
You should for sure just come clean- It will give a lot less stress on you! I'm sure he will like you no matter how you look :) Looks shouldn't matter anyhow!

FreeSpirit
11-16-2010, 11:00 PM
I think you're getting the jist...gist...? I don't know how to spell that. :D
I did lie for the latter. It's just because it came natural because this weight thing is always temporary in my head. I came sorta clean but aside form old pictures he doesn't know the full on brunt of it. I'm hoping to be an acceptable fat when the time comes I get to see him so I don't have to go to that bad place of failure because I know what he likes. He's a Marine (yeah, that doesn't help!) and he's really sweet. He had just seen something on exercise (because I texted him distraught this morning) and called me promptly to try to help me and has been texting me all day about it. He IS supportive but, I just can't be this big when I get to see him. He deserves a better looking chick than fugly me. I don't want to be settled for either. That's kind of worse than being dumped....:(

Ouch on the Nancy Grace. It just bothers me that people think I'm being rude and disrespectful when I'm not trying to at all. I'm stressed, but I'm not attempting to be mean in anyway. I am naturally blunt though. I get right to the point.

Yeah, it seems like everything is against you when you're trying to lose weight. It's so weird. :?: I wish I could stress myself into being skinny!

My husband is a marine, so I'm really not appreciating the implication that comes along with your post. Not all marines will put an ultimatum on their relationship.

I can see so many reasons why your weight would be stalling out. Starting a new exercise regime, the very low amount of calories, the stress. They are ALL contributors to weight stalls.

To be honest, I cannot wish you good luck on your plan because everything about it is unhealthy. The physical AND the emotional.

You are a woman deserving of love and happiness, from others and from within yourself. You deserve a happy and healthy body. So many of your posts talk about how this weight is temporary but you are making it anything but. Yeah, it's coming off now, but with the way you're going about it the first time you fall off the wagon, or when you get to a more "comfortable" weight, and start to increase your calories... it will come RIGHT back on. I can promise you that. What happens when you meet your boyfriend? What if you're still not good enough? What about when you get to goal, and you have loose skin? What about scars from getting a tummy tuck? What if you guys get married and have children and you gain weight again? You deserve so much more than what you're giving yourself.

Like I said, I will not wish you luck on your plan. However, I do wish you luck on this journey. I hope that through this experience you find love for yourself and you find a path to true health and happiness.

HermersSis
11-16-2010, 11:19 PM
My husband is a marine, so I'm really not appreciating the implication that comes along with your post. Not all marines will put an ultimatum on their relationship.

I can see so many reasons why your weight would be stalling out. Starting a new exercise regime, the very low amount of calories, the stress. They are ALL contributors to weight stalls.

To be honest, I cannot wish you good luck on your plan because everything about it is unhealthy. The physical AND the emotional.

You are a woman deserving of love and happiness, from others and from within yourself. You deserve a happy and healthy body. So many of your posts talk about how this weight is temporary but you are making it anything but. Yeah, it's coming off now, but with the way you're going about it the first time you fall off the wagon, or when you get to a more "comfortable" weight, and start to increase your calories... it will come RIGHT back on. I can promise you that. What happens when you meet your boyfriend? What if you're still not good enough? What about when you get to goal, and you have loose skin? What about scars from getting a tummy tuck? What if you guys get married and have children and you gain weight again? You deserve so much more than what you're giving yourself.

Like I said, I will not wish you luck on your plan. However, I do wish you luck on this journey. I hope that through this experience you find love for yourself and you find a path to true health and happiness.

What are you talking about? Why don't YOU calm down and actually look at what I said. I mentioned he was a Marine because that means he's IN GOOD SHAPE, which makes me insecure. I NEVER said him being a Marine gave me any ultimatums and I NEVER said he actually gave me one. I think you need to chill out and get off your high horse..... and I'm rude.

Thanks for the tirade of assumptions, mostly wrong ones, like:

"Not all marines will put an ultimatum on their relationship."
Never said any one single one did.

"the first time you fall off the wagon"
Pretty sure I mentioned in my first post how this has happened multiple times, so that doesn't even make sense.

"and start to increase your calories... it will come RIGHT back on"
Doubt it, because it never happens. I have to go back to eating fast food every day. Pretty sure I mentioned that too.

"What about scars from getting a tummy tuck?"
WHAT? Projection?

"I hope that through this experience you find love for yourself"
Mhm, I don't love myself right now because I'm not dieting the way you think is right. Sure.

Yeah, I'm tired of this. This post really pissed me off, done here.