General chatter - People Who've struggled are Happier

11-14-2010, 04:17 PM
Published in the latest issue of the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology a study found that people with a history of some life-time difficutiles showed less distress and had a greater satisfaction with there lives when compared to people who cruised through life with minimal challenges.

People who experiaced adversity have fewer symptoms of post-traumatic stress and are able to handle new stresses easier then there counter-parts. Although the article also said that those who have been overwhelmed with adversity can develope long term feelings of hopelessness. It really does depend on how an individual interprets there situation.

Anyway I know this sounds boring but I just thought it was interesting. When I read it I got jazzed that because I have gone through some hard times it just means I'm more resilient having gone through it.

Also I thought of my grandmother who was held in a work camp for 6 years in Poland during WWII. After she was liberated from the camp she came to America and started a whole new life. She rarely looked back to mope about what happened and focused on improving the lives of her children and grandchildren. When I read this study I thought wow even though my grandmother was overwhelmed by adversity she did not lose hope that things can change and improve for the better.

So everytime I face a new challenge or adversity I think to myself, "There is always hope for a posative outcome."

11-14-2010, 05:07 PM
I think that's really interesting, too. That's so cool about your grandma.

I think of DH and me. I had a much rougher childhood than he did with a lot more challenges. He's just sort of cruised through. I don't think this makes me more well-adjusted, but I do not sweat the small stuff. Flight delayed? I'll walk laps around the airport. Flat tire? Take a deep breath and watch for traffic. DH doesn't handle stuff like that very well. I'm trying to get him to take things more in stride. On the other hand, he is easier to please. God forbid you mess up my Starbucks order. But for the most part, I know there are worse things in life than a delayed flight. I think I've just realized that getting worked up or flipping out actually changes very little, so why waste the energy?

That's a thinker, isn't it?

11-15-2010, 12:16 AM
I can believe it. I'm with you Junebug, My husband had a really horrible childhood..but he is one of the happiest people that I know. He knows how to handle difficult situations. I, on the other hand..had a great childhood, and cannot deal with stress at all.

11-15-2010, 12:36 AM
I wonder where they found people who had never faced challenges. lol

11-15-2010, 12:43 AM
I wonder where they found people who had never faced challenges. lol

Haha!! Celebs?

11-15-2010, 12:46 AM
I wonder where they found people who had never faced challenges. lol

oh, they are out there- believe me! haha!

yea- i had a really hard childhood, and my adulthood has also been really difficult. i do believe i am able to have a more carefree attitude about things, and also find humor i most situations as a result (coping mechanism)- but sometimes i feel so beaten down that i really do border on hopelessness- when the hits keep coming and don't stop it's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel, so to the past, food was my coping mechanism, but now that i don't eat over things, it's both easier and harder.

but i do find that i appreciate little things so much more than the average person, i have a lot more patience, and overall my perspective is much wider. i don't get upset easily, and am able to handle tough situations much easier than most.

still, though- even though i do think my struggles have made me a stronger person overall, i would still prefer to have not had those experiences. there are some things that a person should never have to endure...for me, the worst thing i have gone through recently is giving birth to two stillborn babies (identical twin daughters) very late in pregnancy (due to a problem with the placenta)- in addition to miscarrying a different pregnancy the year before. that trauma really sent me into the food, and even though it's been over two years now, it still is really really hard for me on a daily basis...especially being able to relate to other people.

11-15-2010, 01:20 AM
I'm really sorry to hear about that, socalfelicity. A lot of people would never come out of that sort of trauma. *e-hug*

I'm not sure about that study. I've had what can be considered an extremely easy breezy life - stuff just falls into my lap, loving happy family etc and I've found that since I've not had a lot of stress to deal with, I don't let things bother me and when emergencies/trauma strikes, I deal very calmly and effectively without panicking.