Weight Loss Support - 2nd week in and I have anger issues




marie81
11-08-2010, 05:38 PM
Hi all I am on my 2nd week and even though I lost 6lb then added 1lb over the weekend due to having a bottle of wine and dinner out on Saturday I am feeling really angery today, not something that I tought would be tied in to dieting.

My husband eats and eats and eats and is very slim, so i am angy at him. (he is eating his 2nd dinner as i type)

My secutary is *****ing about her weight when she is 2 stone lighter then me and scoffing treats at her desk so I am angry with her, I did suggest we dieted together, havent had an answer yet

Everything is just getting me down today I am not hugry so i dont know whats going on and its not PTM

Has anyone else had this in the 1st couple of weeks? and what can i do to subside this?

Could this be linked to suger withdrawl?

All advice welcome please

Thanks

Marie x


Shmead
11-08-2010, 06:27 PM
For me, that kind of anger means I am hungry past the point of hunger pangs. How much are you eating?

beerab
11-08-2010, 06:35 PM
Are you doing low carb or something? I know for me I was CRANKY the first few days- anything you could say even "hello" probably would make me mad lol.

It does wear off- but if you are very hungry you may want to eat a bit more calories.

I learned a long time ago some people can just eat more- does your husband work a physically demanding job? My husband's job is more physical than mine and he eats more than I do- but he can afford to because of his harder workload. It's better to just let it go and work with what you do have :)

I'm sure there is someone else thinking why do you think you are fat and annoyed with you too lol- just cuz she's thinner than you doesn't mean she's okay with her weight or that she should be.


Pudgebrownie
11-08-2010, 08:09 PM
When you restrict your body from what it has previously been used to chowing down on, your body sort of protests and as a result, you get cranky and angry. I went through the same behaviour a few months ago when I first started my weight loss journey. I was just plain mean. I recommend you reevaluate what you're consuming (or lack of) and how much you're consuming (or lack of) to help pinpoint what's going on within your body. Just as a note, I found that my first 4-5 pounds that I lost was just water weight. It's not actual weight-weight. So it's easy to lose and regain that. So keep this in mind.

skylinedrive
11-08-2010, 08:12 PM
i have that problem. it's been pretty bad lately to the point i get so frustrated i start crying. today i blew up at my boyfriend because all he does is lay on the couch and he won't go to the gym or workout with me. i need a buddy to exercise with or else i will just give up.

Sunshine73
11-08-2010, 08:49 PM
Uh, yeah, the 2nd week in was about the time I turned into a raging witch. My poor hubs. It was like having nonstop raging PMS and everything annoyed me to the point where I was ready to snap everyone's head right off. Personally I think it was sugar/junk food withdrawal because I was certainly acting like my hubs had acted when he quit smoking. :dizzy:

The good news is that after a rough few days the feelings started to subside and I was back to normal. You can do this, just hang in there and ride it out. :hug:

marie81
11-09-2010, 05:25 AM
Thanks girls I do feel alittle better today but still not great, I have been a bit extreme with cutting back I have cut out all suger and lowered carb and fat intake massivly hopefully its just my body fighting against it.
The cravings for sweet things has gone completely but I do feel hungery quite alot but thats not when I get angry its just after I have eaten I am worse, I think its the guilt of eating

I lost another 1lb when I weighed in this morning so has lightened my mood a little, i hope it lasts.

Marie

gingernut
11-09-2010, 05:58 AM
I discovered that I get like that when i have to much sugary foods , I also get very low if i eat milk chocolate and the wine can also make me very moody
Try keeping a diary and see if that helps , if you recognise the foods / drinks that make you feel like this then it is worth avoiding them
Second week can also get you down as in the first you have been so good and feel deprived in the second week
What programme are you following does it restrict you in the foods you like and maybe need a little of
Try eating six small meals a day and plenty of fruit and don't worry about the hubby the day will come when the roles are reversed trust me mine was the same and he now has a weight problem. also if your friend doesn't want to join you then fine you will be the one laughing when you are nice and slim and she is still overweight

marie81
11-09-2010, 09:47 AM
Thanks honey, the thing is I dont eat alot normally its wine and fizzy drinks that have added all this weight on mixed with no exercise I have gotten bigger :(
I am cutting out the fizzy drinks and limitting wine to weekends and even then avoiding where possible along side lowering fat intake to no more then 30g per day

If this anger keeps up i will go and see my GP, I have been a mightmare at work today snapping all the time and my poor husband got the full force last night, it cant be nice for him

Thanks for all your thoughts and advice girls xx

MadameZombie
11-09-2010, 10:29 AM
I just want to say that you should NEVER be hungry losing weight! First of all, don't be cruel to yourself, you can't expect that starving throughout the day is going to get you to your results faster. If you are feeling hungry, try eating more low calorie snacks between meals. If you are starving by the time to get to lunch you are only going to gorge or feel unsatisfied and it could also be an indicator that you aren't getting enough to eat. It's easy to get discouraged if you're constantly hungry and we want you to be healthy and successful!

beerab
11-09-2010, 12:06 PM
I agree you shouldn't be very hungry- if you are doing low carb you need to eat more protein and some more fats- unless you are eating only veggies and fruit it's hard to do low carb and low fat. Even with south beach you concentrate on good fats. If you are famished have a snack.

sacha
11-09-2010, 12:21 PM
Sorry, I have to disagree. A little bit of hunger is certainly normal when you are eating less calories than you burn.

The need to never have hunger is what gets a lot of us in this predicament. It's okay to be hungry. Now, being ravenous is usually not a good idea when it can be prevented, but a little hunger is ok and normal.

Part of this journey is a mind game.

TornadoSiren
11-09-2010, 03:07 PM
Sorry, I have to disagree. A little bit of hunger is certainly normal when you are eating less calories than you burn.

The need to never have hunger is what gets a lot of us in this predicament. It's okay to be hungry. Now, being ravenous is usually not a good idea when it can be prevented, but a little hunger is ok and normal.

Part of this journey is a mind game.

I have to agree with this. ^ A little bit of hunger never hurt anyone. about 70 percent of the time my breakfast holds me till about 11:30 or so when I start to prepare my lunch, but the other 30 percent, I start to feel those hunger pangs sometimes as early as 9:30. If I grabbed a 100 calorie snack everytime I started to feel a little bit of hunger, i can guarantee you I would be at least 5 pounds heavier than I currently am. This would not necessarily be a bad thing, but it would be an unnecessary thing.
Now, this is different from a constant hunger because you are depriving yourself, but being hungry is natural, and not going to hurt anyone, nor derail a diet plan. If you find yourself hungry right after eating, or can never quite get rid of the hunger pangs, then it is definitely time to reevaluate your intake, but having some hunger pangs in between meals is pretty much a natural thing.
My first thought when I get a bit hungry in between meals is not to grab a snack, but to find a project or something to do for an hour or two till next meal time to keep myself occupied.

marie81
11-09-2010, 03:19 PM
I have been hungry ALOT today but I have not eaten until the times i planned am my moods have been funny real lows and the like this evening real hyper highs (witch i quite enjoyed)
i have had my quota for today so i am going to kick back and watch holby then an early night I have my weigh in tomorrow morning and i am feeling positive

Anger hasnt been to bad today but still there under lying I hope it passes soon

Marie xx

chubbyhipster
11-09-2010, 03:46 PM
Just a quick question- How many calories a day are you eating and are you eating snacks between meals?

I know that some people think that being hungry is normal, but if you're hungry to the point of snapping at people that's different. Just be sure that your eating is realistic :) Being thin and grumpy is just as bad as being big and bummed out :^:

marie81
11-09-2010, 04:56 PM
its not the hunger thats making me snap its normally just after i have eaten that i turn in to a monster
I am having 1000 cals a day and Tangerines as snacks inbetween

JoJoJo2
11-09-2010, 06:03 PM
Just eating 1000 calories per day is a pretty low calorie intake. That's much lower than what I lost weight on. If I ate just 1000 calories per day I would be munching on the furniture.

seagirl
11-09-2010, 06:35 PM
A lot of times people use food as a coping mechanism, and when that's taken away they have to actually deal with the uncomfortable feeling of feeling your feelings.

You might want to find some new coping mechanism like journaling, walking, yoga, meditation, etc. Something healthy.

Arctic Mama
11-09-2010, 07:03 PM
When I get hungry between meals and I know I am not really needing a substantial snack, just munchy, I drink some tea. I still, make sure to eat within an hour or so, but sometimes a little liquid takes the edge off (I get hunger and thirst confused easily).

If I am having gnawing, gut hunger that is my signal I need to eat more calories. Adding in a healthy snack (like an apple) with a fat to help my brain signal hunger is being satiated helps a lot. So some cashews or cottage cheese with that apple? Great, substantial, healthy snack that tides me over the few hours until the next meal. Eating frequently also helps me thwart the hunger monster.

airbear
11-09-2010, 07:29 PM
Sorry, I have to disagree. A little bit of hunger is certainly normal when you are eating less calories than you burn.

The need to never have hunger is what gets a lot of us in this predicament. It's okay to be hungry. Now, being ravenous is usually not a good idea when it can be prevented, but a little hunger is ok and normal.

Part of this journey is a mind game.

I agree! I won't lose unless I'm a little hungry.

marie81
11-10-2010, 06:15 AM
the anger gets worse today I weighed my self and the scales are not moving, so I went mental at my husband as he feeds me!!!
Last night he sat there munching cookies asking me if i wanted some, but I was good and said no. he just winds me up. I think i am going to have to deal with the fact my marraige needs working on, along side the dieting

As for the low cals its not food thats my problem its drinks I have to have a drink in my hand all the time, I am trying to get it to be water and thats not going to bad I have been 8days with out a coke so I please with this.

Sorry to rant and go on, I am finding this very hard and the results are not fast enough, If i dont lose enough weight by march I am going to not go on my holiday to Aus as there is NO WAY i can put on swim wear this size. I was also put on anti depressants last year because i cried when the doctor weighed me, thankfully I am off these now as the bloody things made me GAIN weight. I feel like i cant win

Shmead
11-10-2010, 06:31 AM
I really think you should try upping your calories by 200-300 a day and see if that fixes the problem. What you are describing is exactly what used to happen to me, and I also never thought I was all that hungry. When you are really starving, the body gives up on hunger pangs but hunger still affects you.

That anger/frustration is what ruined every diet I ever went on before this time--and this time I've lost 135 pounds. I couldn't be a raving ***** 24/7 and I eventually would snap.

Trust me when I say that an extra 300 calories a day for 5 days is not going to pack the weight back on, and it's worth the experiment to see if it helps with the moods.

mkendrick
11-10-2010, 10:09 AM
You've gotten lots of good replies, and I don't have the time to read through them all...Pardon if I'm repeating.

I did and still do feel anger and frustration though the weight loss and maintenance process.
- I feel anger at our culture in general that constantly dangles fast food, sweets, etc in my face. Shoot, it doesn't even dangle, it smears unhealthy food in my face.
- I'm angry at the culture that smears bad food in my face but tells me I'm only beautiful if I'm thin.
- I'm angry at naturally thin people who eat whatever they want and don't gain (*cough*myfiance*cough*)
- I'm angry at people who can so easily walk away from food when they feel full. Lord knows I wish I could leave french fries on my plate just because I was full!
- I'm angry at myself for NOT being able to quit when I'm full.
- I'm angry at my parents for not teaching me better eating habits when I was younger.
- I'm angry and frustrated that even though I've gotten to my goal, I will have to be obsessive about my eating habits and what goes into my mouth for the rest of my life or else I'll gain it back.
- I'm angry that I will never just be able to eat. I know that's kind of a "duh" statement, but yea, I'm ticked off that I can't just eat all of the bad foods that I want and not worry about it. While I am not "hungry," and if I'm honest with myself, I am very content and satisfied to stay on plan for the rest of my life. But sometimes I feel like I'm condemned to a life of being "hungry" because I can't eat McDonalds and go out for ice cream and eat cookies like everyone else.

There are many more. Buuuut, having lived a lifetime of being overweight and "fat and happy" as one might say, eating all that junk whenever I wanted, I can confidently say that it wasn't worth it. Sure, I could eat whatever I wanted, but I was overweight, insecure, constantly coveting a healthier slimmer body, constantly wishing I had more self control. I was FAR more miserable when I was "fat and happy." So yes, now I am thin and I have to constantly watch what I eat and I can't indulge whenever I want to and sometimes that infuriates me...but overall, I am so much happier. I'm proud of my accomplishments, proud that I have learned to take control, and proud of my body. In the end, I'd rather be thin and not have a second dinner than fat and eat a second dinner.

Also, on a more physiological note...as others have said, sometimes our bodies have a physical reaction to not getting as much food (or carbs/sugars or unhealthy fats or whatever) as it's used to and we have a physical response that makes us irritable. Our bodies are programmed to WANT sugar/carbs, fat, etc and to WANT to maintain weight. When we deprive it of those things, we often feel agitated. But as the body adjusts, those feelings subside.

marie81
11-10-2010, 12:04 PM
wow Megan you have done so well!!!!

I agree with you on all of the points above, sometimes its a no win situation, as for the blaming my parents i couldnt agree more my mother is a very large woman she wont tell us her weight but she is dubble me she should of stoped me and my sister eating like her when we where young I am definatly not making the same mistake with my girls

I am hoping my body ajusts soon I am starting to get headaches with the diet the last 2 days have been bad but I am slugging back water to try and clear it

19Deltawifey
11-10-2010, 01:16 PM
Thanks girls I do feel alittle better today but still not great, I have been a bit extreme with cutting back I have cut out all suger and lowered carb and fat intake massivly hopefully its just my body fighting against it.
The cravings for sweet things has gone completely but I do feel hungery quite alot but thats not when I get angry its just after I have eaten I am worse, I think its the guilt of eating

I lost another 1lb when I weighed in this morning so has lightened my mood a little, i hope it lasts.

Marie

Since you have lowered your carb and fat intake, are you eating high amounts of protein? I read your other post where you said that you keep your fat grams under 30g a day. I didn't read the whole thread just bits and pieces but you can't have very low carb as well as very low fat, look up "rabbit starvation". What does your protein intake look like?

I personally can't stick to a diet where I am hungry and grouchy the whole time. For me I had to find something that I could stick too and not something I had to white knuckle my way through. Maybe you just haven't found the right diet yet. I've lowered my carbs but they are not eliminated, try eating a moderate carb level between 100-200g a day, you can stick to low fat but you do need some fat and 30g seems kind of low. Also up your protein this will keep you satisfied longer. For me the key is I can't do low carb, I've tried it in the past and was miserable (some do well on it). Also if I eat too many carbs I feel tired and usually 1-2 hours later my blood sugar would crash, so for me a moderate carb level works. Eating protein at every meal stabilizes my blood sugar as well as makes me feel better. For breakfast I ate fiber ceral with milk and I forgot my protein and sure enough a hour later I had a headache, ate some protein and headache was gone.Good Luck it took me years to find out what works for me, just find what works for you. :hug:

marie81
11-11-2010, 05:24 AM
Thanks Calry I have just looked up rabbit starvation and I think thats why I am getting headaches last night my headache was so bad I went and stayed in a dark room I didnt sleep very well waking up every hour was horible as I have to be up at 5am for work
I am going to have some lamb and veg for dinner tonight so hopefully a little fat will help.
I am still grumpy but I am starting to think maybe that is just how I am :)

mkendrick
11-11-2010, 08:27 AM
One more thing, since we're discussing cranky-ness as a result of hunger. I agree that it's normal and expected to feel "hungry" when we're eating less calories than we're used to and also creating a calorie deficit (burning more than we eat). Our brains evolved mechanisms to shout out "um, excuse me, we're running on empty here...what are we gonna do when you can't find the next mammoth to kill? Eat something!!!" Weight loss goes against every instinct that we likely aren't even aware of, so, yes, that will make us cranky. Especially at the beginning of our lifestyle changes when we aren't used to the "hunger" feeling. For me, my "hunger" was the fact that I couldn't completely feast and stuff myself every meal. I felt "hungry" and deprived. I legitimately mourned the loss of some of my old favorite foods, I was truly sad about it.

That being said. It's SO important to have a plan that we can and will and are happy to stick to. Sure, on any given day I'd rather have Chinese buffet if I could eat it and not gain weight, but, I am very content to eat on plan. Why? Because I like what I'm eating, I am eating enough, I am eating foods that fill me up, I have an eating schedule that keeps me happy, and I have stuck with it long enough to realize that the results of staying on plan are so worth giving up my old habits and favorite foods for.

Perhaps you're simply not content with your current plan, and it needs to be tweaked. When I first started, I figured I'd have to devolve into a rabbit to lose weight. I ate salads every meal because, well, people on diets eat salads, right? You don't think I was cranky!? Shoot, I would have murdered for some real food. Diet confessional #23526: I hate salad. I don't mind it if there's so much meat, cheese, nuts, dressing, etc with a few pieces of lettuce thrown in, but for that amount of calories, I'd rather just eat something else. So, I gave up on salad. Then I tried eating the 6 mini meals per day because that's what so many diet advice tips will say. I ate itty bitty "meals" of lean protein, fiber, and complex carbs every few hours. I was never really hungry, but I was absolutely never satisfied. I was obsessed with watching the clock, waiting for my next mini meal. I tried it for 6 weeks, but I was nearly crazy by the end of it. Food obsessed, hyper focused on the clock, constantly desperate for the next snack. And yes, very very cranky.

Finally I said to heck with it, I'll eat what and how I want. I now eat a small lunch in the middle of the afternoon, a MASSIVE dinner, and I snack all night. And I eat delicious things like a huge veggie omelet over 4 pieces of toast, pumpkin pie oatmeal, cinnamon toast crunch popcorn, and so on. I eat warm comfort foods and a truck load of it. I still stay within my calorie limits for the day, I just tweaked my plan to find exactly what I like to eat and when to eat it. I am no longer cranky :)