100 lb. Club - I can't believe I'm this big




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thewronggirl
09-15-2010, 01:45 PM
I'm new to posting, but am a habitual lurker around these parts.

Most of my life I've lived around the 170 mark (excluding childhood)...I always felt enormous, but when I look back on photos I actually look pretty healthy at that weight and it kills me that I've let it get this far out of control. I got married 6 years ago and over the course of the first two years the lovely combination of Depo and fast food led me to the 240'ish range. I got down to 220 lbs. and stayed around that weight for a couple of years. Within the last year I piled on an extra 30 pounds. For some odd reason I've been in size 22 since I've been in the 220s. Weird.

Anyway, something finally clicked...I realized I was going to be 30 in August and I refuse to be fat on my 30th birthday. So I spent a month and a half gradually cutting back on fast food and sodas until I was ready to cut them out completely. I started a food journal and keep my calories around 1200 to 1500 and really started losing weight. I've been journaling (i.e. seriously changing) for 4 weeks and I've lost nearly 10 pounds. I have goals and intend to be my high school weight of 150 by my birthday in August. Ultimately I want to be smaller, but I think 150 is a reasonable first goal.

Last night I had my husband take some photographs as semi-before images so that when I reach goal I can post here and hopefully inspire others. But the problem is...I'm devastated. I had no idea I was so huge and disgusting. Now, it is TOM so it could be adding to my state of mind, but I'm having a really difficult time. I'm one of those who is obsessed with the idea of loose skin...it has literally stopped me from moving forward in the past. I know everyone says it's better than being obese, and I agree...but, I don't know. I just cannot get the idea out of mind--especially now that I've seen what I really look like. I'm not going to let this loose skin fear stop me, but I'm having a really hard time. I could deal with a tummy tuck and boob job, but not a lower body lift or the arm skin thing.......This is coming off as completely whiny and stupid, I know, and it's a **** of a way to introduce myself. I'm just feeling so down and hopeless right now.


neonwildflower
09-15-2010, 01:59 PM
That's why we're here, to listen when you're whiny and stupid and cheer when you knock some sense into yourself ;) I hear you, though... I always looked at pictures of myself at my highest weight and thought "wow that's a really unflattering picture" because when I looked in the mirror I didn't see myself the same way. Then I got honest with myself and took some pictures from all angles and realised that no, the pictures weren't necessarily bad... I looked bad. Period. I was being swallowed up by my fat. I still am, to be fair, but I now look at pictures of myself with the hope and faith that every time I take them they'll get a little better.

Loose skin is a scary thought! However, like everyone says, it's a whole lot better than morbid obesity! Lucky for you, you already have a husband who loves you and will find you sexy no matter what... or at least he should! Lol. Ultimately your health is the biggest priority, and then you can look into toning, giving yourself time for your skin to shrink back a bit, and possibly even plastic surgery if it comes to it.

One day at a time, right? Focus on the fact that you've done well so far, and make a plan for the future... how you'll keep doing it, what you'll do to reward yourself as you go, and so on. And keep posting! We'll have your back, no matter what.

sept15lija
09-15-2010, 02:28 PM
It sounds like you're doing awesome! Progress pics are great to have - so keep snapping away. I'm not sure what to tell you on the loose skin front, as I feel exactly as you do. I'm really worried about it, and upset that I allowed this to happen to my body. I feel like I'll always wonder what might have been had I not allowed food to control me. I have no doubt that not being obese is worth the loose skin (the difference I feel already is incredible - mind you I have been obese a LONG time, since early teens) but still the thought of all that extra skin sucks, big time. Anyhow thanks for giving me a chance to complain too! ;)


Lnoelparis
09-15-2010, 02:38 PM
OH HEY! Are you my twin? OMG...everything you just said is almost exactly what I posted in my intro today.

Depo? Oh gosh...THE WORST! I can totally relate to you! It sounds like we are also doing similar things to lose the weight. I think you are doing great so far and you are also on the right track.

I understand your fears about the loose skin! :( I hate to think about it too, but I also have seen my body tightening up with exercise and I think that it wont be as bad as I thought! I know I wont look like a Playboy model, but that's okay, I have had kids and my body is stretched out, my boobies are saggy...I thought about surgery, but I want to see what I can do first!

It's okay to whine here, you have lots of support! Just keep going, you are doing great with the changes you made so far!

Vixsin
09-15-2010, 04:14 PM
:hug: Whine away!!! that's what this place is for! I personally think you are doing great!

:welcome3: Welcome aboard. We're glad you're here!

stephanieg
09-15-2010, 05:47 PM
I've known I need to lose weight for a long time. Every once in awhile I would be mortified by a photo, but since I generally avoid photos as much as possible, it wasn't a common occurrence. THEN...last month we took our family to a hotel, and I took the baby swimming for the first time. My husband shot the photos, and since he is very technologically averse he didn't really zoom in or anything (here I was thinking he'd zoom in on the baby and all you would see would be a little strip of my swimsuit). Nope...photo after photo after photo of me IN A SWIMSUIT. It was nothing short of horrifying. Right up there with those moments when I catch a glimpse of myself in a window and for a moment I ask myself "who is THAT fat person?" only to realize in the next moment that the fat person is me.

It's a hard, harsh, difficult reality to face, but we are here to face it together, and move past it one day, one pound at a time.

katec
09-15-2010, 07:51 PM
I am right there with you. In fact, you and I are pretty much at the exact same weights - start, current, and goal. The way I see it is that, like others said, loose skin is so preferable to being as big as I am right now. I will deal with what my body looks like when I get there, and in the meantime I'm going to counteract the effects as best I can with strength workouts and dry brushing (it may or may not help, but my skin feels great, at least!) For me, at least, this is a mental battle more than anything - me vs. food and my emotions and my self-esteem issues. For once, I'd like to win. You can do it, and I'm right here with you!

dreamerchick
09-15-2010, 10:01 PM
I'm with you! Just gotta keep thinking "man, one of these days I'm going to be thin and gorgeous!" Plus, all these wonderful people supporting doesn't hurt either!
keep on keepin' on! :D

Shmead
09-15-2010, 10:35 PM
Right now you are used to hating your body, so you think having lose skin will feel like that. But it really doesn't. After you lose the weight, you love your body. You're amazed at what it can do--you're proud of your body like it's your child who just won the Nobel Prize. When you feel like that about your body, you don't mind the minor flaws because they are insignificant in the big picture.

My body WORKS now. It can do things. It can run up stairs, go over a fence, jump up on a counter, lift and carry a box of paper. It can slip between two tightly parked cars and negotiate a crowded room and slide into a booth. It can pick up a dropped pencil without a second thought and curl up into a ball on the couch. It can run errands all day and come home to clean house. This may be TMI, but it can **** for as long as it wants to and in exotic positions, and it has regular monthly cycles for the first time ever.

Furthermore, it looks great. It rocks a pair of size ten pants and a medium shirt, and looks pretty hot in a tankini with boy shorts. It does amazing things to a negligee.

Does it have some loose skin? A bit--if you saw me naked, you'd know I lost weight or think I had a baby. But there's so much to like about my body that the things I don't like get drowned out. The same will be true for you, too, I promise.

I started much bigger than you--300 lbs (at least) and a size 28. I am sorry that the pictures were so hard for you. I've honestly never seen such a picture of myself because I worked HARD not to (for ten years, I closed my eyes every time I approached a mirror or plate glass door). But
really, honestly, you can do this, and it's the most amazingly wonderful thing that will ever happen to you. The loose skin is just a slight wrinkle in the midst of a million joyous changes.

Jelbelle
09-15-2010, 11:24 PM
I know what you mean, definitely. It's so hard to look back on old pictures and think "why didn't I stop myself?" you know? I wish I could go back in time and tell myself to take it easy, that I could have gotten in shape before I lost all my self-esteem. I feel like I just blew up, I really do. There's no better way to describe it. But you know what? We are young. And 30 is still young in my opinion, and you can put in the effort, put in the time, work it off, and you're going to have so many years where you are thin and happy. I always have to remind myself that it isn't too late, and I think that's very important!

thewronggirl
09-16-2010, 12:59 AM
Wow. Y'all are amazing. And you're all right.

Yes, I'm so mad at myself for allowing this. Mad as ****. There are so many what ifs on this journey...what if I'd never let this happen, what if I get loose skin, what if I don't get loose skin, what if I never get the body I really want, what if I get to my ultimate goal and my self esteem is blown to smithereens because of what I look like...why why WHY did I get this way? It's frustrating, but I'm moving forward. I'm not going to let it stop me this time.

I'm definitely doing ALL I can that's thought to possibly combat the loose skin (dry brushing, moisturizing, drinking 100 oz. of water per day, taking MSM internally and using it topically in soap and lotion, alfalfa supplements) so I'm hopeful, but not particularly optimistic...LOL...as if you couldn't tell from this thread!

But thanks everyone. It's so amazing to know you all are going through or have gone through the same thing. It's so nice to know I'm not alone. Husbands just don't get it.

Last night while I was boo-hooing about my photos to my husband, he said "well you took them in the most unflattering clothing possible" (jersey gaucho pants and a tight tank top)...I had to laugh...Isn't that the point? To get the REAL idea instead of covering all the lumps, bumps, and uneven boobage with a giant t-shirt? ha...men!

graciegoose13
09-16-2010, 01:09 AM
I can definitely relate to having days where you look in the mirror or see a photo that makes you cringe and it makes you feel totally defeated. In fact, this is a problem that really hindered me from losing weight in the past. However, in the last couple of months, I tried to adjust how I see myself. When I'm having a "fat day," I promise myself to eat healthy and go exercise, because as long as I keep doing what I'm doing, the weight will come off eventually.

It usually works too! Weight loosing is a total emotional and physical rollercoaster, so when you're feeling yourself at a low, just remember you'll be at a high in no time provided you keep doin' what you're doin'!

PDXgirl
09-16-2010, 01:25 AM
Well, your husband and all your friends and family see you at the size you are everyday, and they love you!!
Seeing the full body pic after a long time of avoidance can be a pretty shocking thing, though. I know exactly how that is! Don't be angry at yourself, be proud of yourself for working on making a change!
As far as hang-y skin, my mom and a few of her friends have lost a good deal of weight and they got these sort of compression body suit things. It has really helped keep things together while they firm up and these women are in their 50s!
Do your best and deal with new challenges as they arise.

carter
09-16-2010, 11:13 AM
I am right there with you. In fact, you and I are pretty much at the exact same weights - start, current, and goal. The way I see it is that, like others said, loose skin is so preferable to being as big as I am right now. I will deal with what my body looks like when I get there

Same here, I have similar stats to the OP as well (though in my case it's not wanting to be fat when I turn 40, not 30 ;)).

I'm going to say something a little harsh, please forgive me: letting fear of "loose skin" keep you from losing weight is really lame. It's a lame excuse to keep eating whatever you feel like eating, to avoid having to drag your butt to the gym, to avoid giving yourself the healthier body you deserve. It's just another way to undermine yourself, just like "I'm too busy to work out" or "I don't have time to cook two meals so I'll just eat this fried steak I made for my partner" or "I'll start after the holidays" or any of the other myriad excuses we make for ourselves that keep us fat.

Loose skin? When you look at the gorgeous "after" photos of the people on this board who have lost a lot of weight successfully, do you think "wow, she'd look great if it weren't for all that loose skin?"

Loose skin doesn't increase your risk of heart disease or cancer. It doesn't leave you out of breath after climbing the stairs or chasing your kids around the park. It doesn't make potential employees judge you (even unconsciously) as a lazy or undisciplined person. Etc, etc, etc all the reasons why being thin with a little loose skin is preferable to being fat.

It's time to pull up your big-girl panties and stop letting fear of loose skin justify shoveling cupcakes into your mouth. ;)

LiannaKole
09-16-2010, 11:47 AM
I don't think you sound "whiny and stupid" at all. Not at all.

I understand the mentality of seeing myself one day and realized how big I'd become. It's one of the least fun things I've ever experienced. What's good to remember is that with work and new habits on, it won't always be that way. You can do this.

Also, with the loose skin, it's definitely a concern of mine as well. But even if I do get it, that's a heck of a lot easier to cover up with clothing. And apparently the pictures of the enormous amounts of loose skin I googled are from people who have had weight loss surgery and lose weight super fast. Eating right and working out, cardio and weight lifting, should help a lot from what I've read.

You're doing amazing so far!

Lyn2007
09-16-2010, 11:48 AM
I have had worries about loose skin too. In fact I just posted about that on my blog. But the bottom line is, you can always gain back the weight. Give it a try, lose the weight, give your skin time to adjust. It probably won't be as bad as you think! I would never go back!

thewronggirl
09-16-2010, 12:08 PM
Same here, I have similar stats to the OP as well (though in my case it's not wanting to be fat when I turn 40, not 30 ;)).

I'm going to say something a little harsh, please forgive me: letting fear of "loose skin" keep you from losing weight is really lame. It's a lame excuse to keep eating whatever you feel like eating, to avoid having to drag your butt to the gym, to avoid giving yourself the healthier body you deserve. It's just another way to undermine yourself, just like "I'm too busy to work out" or "I don't have time to cook two meals so I'll just eat this fried steak I made for my partner" or "I'll start after the holidays" or any of the other myriad excuses we make for ourselves that keep us fat.

Loose skin? When you look at the gorgeous "after" photos of the people on this board who have lost a lot of weight successfully, do you think "wow, she'd look great if it weren't for all that loose skin?"

Loose skin doesn't increase your risk of heart disease or cancer. It doesn't leave you out of breath after climbing the stairs or chasing your kids around the park. It doesn't make potential employees judge you (even unconsciously) as a lazy or undisciplined person. Etc, etc, etc all the reasons why being thin with a little loose skin is preferable to being fat.

It's time to pull up your big-girl panties and stop letting fear of loose skin justify shoveling cupcakes into your mouth. ;)

You know, while I completely agree with you...that it's not an excuse...it clearly IS a concern for many many people. And the fact that it's vain doesn't make it any less valid. A lot of people on this forum seem to be able to deal with this issue much more easily than others. I don't really understand the reasons why, but it's obvious that there are many people here who have trouble with the concept.

Obviously the loose skin would be preferable to being obese and having health problems, but that fact doesn't make me wake up one day and think "wow, when I'm 150 pounds I'll be at much less risk for heart disease"....Instead I wonder if I'll like the body I'll have at 150 pounds. Vain? Probably. But it's my reality. I'm not letting it get in my way this time, but it still weighs on my mind quite a bit.

And if we're being 100% honest here, I do look at the photos of loose skin and wonder if the people are happy with it because I know I would not be. I don't think they are unattractive in any way and they look incredible, but I'm losing weight for myself, not for others, and I want myself to be happy with me.

Ultimately I don't really have much control over this particular issue. I'm doing what I can to prevent it and I'm always looking for new research and methods to combat the possibility. I do, however, have control over my weight loss and I'm focused on reaching that goal.

kbj0123
09-16-2010, 01:43 PM
Right now you are used to hating your body, so you think having lose skin will feel like that. But it really doesn't. After you lose the weight, you love your body. You're amazed at what it can do--you're proud of your body like it's your child who just won the Nobel Prize. When you feel like that about your body, you don't mind the minor flaws because they are insignificant in the big picture.

My body WORKS now. It can do things. It can run up stairs, go over a fence, jump up on a counter, lift and carry a box of paper. It can slip between two tightly parked cars and negotiate a crowded room and slide into a booth. It can pick up a dropped pencil without a second thought and curl up into a ball on the couch. It can run errands all day and come home to clean house. This may be TMI, but it can **** for as long as it wants to and in exotic positions, and it has regular monthly cycles for the first time ever.

Furthermore, it looks great. It rocks a pair of size ten pants and a medium shirt, and looks pretty hot in a tankini with boy shorts. It does amazing things to a negligee.

Does it have some loose skin? A bit--if you saw me naked, you'd know I lost weight or think I had a baby. But there's so much to like about my body that the things I don't like get drowned out. The same will be true for you, too, I promise.

I started much bigger than you--300 lbs (at least) and a size 28. I am sorry that the pictures were so hard for you. I've honestly never seen such a picture of myself because I worked HARD not to (for ten years, I closed my eyes every time I approached a mirror or plate glass door). But
really, honestly, you can do this, and it's the most amazingly wonderful thing that will ever happen to you. The loose skin is just a slight wrinkle in the midst of a million joyous changes.

I love this post, it encourages me so much.

kbj0123
09-16-2010, 01:49 PM
Don't let fear of lose skin cripple you, weight loss comes with so many other benefits, you just may not have the time to focus on the skin. I started at 272 and i absolutely hated how I looked naked, now it gets better as I get smaller, I am very proud of myself and I know my body will not be perfect, but I know I will love being able to fit in certain sizes and do so much more with my body. I know you will too.

Terre
09-16-2010, 01:54 PM
I started here on Jan 18th 2010 and changed my lifestyle. It has been 8 months and I have lost 92lbs. My hubby has lost 65lbs my oldest daughter has lost 65 lbs and my youngest daughter has lost 10lbs. So as of today 232lbs for all of us.

I was a size 24 and weighed 255 when I began. I now weigh 163lbs I walk 3 miles a day (leslie sansone dvd) Monday-friday
I eat 1200-1300 calories a day
we quit eating anything fried
Changed to wheat products no white flour
switched to sugar free products instead of sugar
I quit drinking pop and switched to water and green tea
I weigh daily. Makes me understand what I eat and drink affect me.

I couldnt believe how big I had gotten either. I actually had shrunk and since I have been loosing weight I have got 2" back. SO now I am 5'4" yea!!

Do I have loose skin??? yes I do. But that's ok. My boobs have gotten smaller and alot saggier but thats ok...Bras do wonders. The skin is hidden from anyone but hubby :) and its better than the fat that was also there under it.

Good luck. I know you can do it. I was basically bedridden when I started. If I can anyone can :)

carter
09-16-2010, 02:26 PM
You know, while I completely agree with you...that it's not an excuse...it clearly IS a concern for many many people. And the fact that it's vain doesn't make it any less valid. A lot of people on this forum seem to be able to deal with this issue much more easily than others. I don't really understand the reasons why, but it's obvious that there are many people here who have trouble with the concept.

Obviously the loose skin would be preferable to being obese and having health problems, but that fact doesn't make me wake up one day and think "wow, when I'm 150 pounds I'll be at much less risk for heart disease"....Instead I wonder if I'll like the body I'll have at 150 pounds. Vain? Probably. But it's my reality. I'm not letting it get in my way this time, but it still weighs on my mind quite a bit.


There is nothing wrong with a little vanity - heck, I am as vain as anyone. But if you will forgive me, I don't get the impression you are so happy with the body you have now, either.

All I am suggesting, without any flippancy now, is that if worries about a little loose skin outweigh all the obvious (your word) benefits of losing the weight, then perhaps your priorities do need some re-evaluating. It's not productive to let the dread of hypothetical body features make you cling to the unhealthy and definitely not hypothetical body you have right now.

Whether it's "valid" to worry about loose skin isn't really the issue. The issue is whether that worry is worth staying fat over. To me, that seems like a no-brainer. The hypothetical worry about a purely cosmetic problem that I might not even have, or that might mostly correct itself in a year or two, does strike me as a weak excuse not to take on the hard work of not being fat anymore. There are all kinds of benefits to staying fat - being invisible, getting to eat whatever you want, not having to make time to go to the gym, and now you can add not having loose skin to that list - but at some point every one who successfully loses weight decides by force of will that the benefits of being thin outweigh all of those advantages of being fat.

I guess if these factors weigh differently for you, you can go right on being fat, and then you won't have to worry about the possibility of loose skin any more. That's not the choice I would make, but I think being fat sucks and I'm sick of it. As you point out, other choices are valid. Maybe I am sounding harsh again, but it seems like that's what the choices boil down to.

thewronggirl
09-16-2010, 07:59 PM
I think we're having a bit of a misunderstanding.

I don't agree that it is worth staying fat over. I've never once suggested anything like that. But it is, to me, worth worrying about...and obviously a lot of other people worry about it as well and no amount of people saying it's not something to bother ourselves with makes it go away. (However, Shmead's post was quite inspiring.)

Do I spend every single minute thinking and obsessing about it? Of course not. But this seems to be a place where people understand my fears about it--clearly some more than others--and thus this thread was born. Some of you are at a different place in your journey and you feel differently about the loose skin issue, and then some seem to not even care if they get it. That's fantastic, but it's not me. I'm not there and I probably won't be.

However, like I've said in each post, I'm not letting it deter me. I am worried about it and my concerns and my feelings are valid. I don't, as you continue to suggest, plan on staying fat because of the possibility of loose skin. Clearly this is a place where people are concerned about that topic and I feel like I have a right to express my mental stumbling blocks without receiving a lecture.

I've made my choice. I'm losing the weight and I'm being successful at it. But I can still lose the weight and be upset over the loose skin issue--the two aren't mutually exclusive.

Shmead
09-16-2010, 08:19 PM
I've made my choice. I'm losing the weight and I'm being successful at it. But I can still lose the weight and be upset over the loose skin issue--the two aren't mutually exclusive.

Absolutely. Let me try to explain why you are getting this reaction:

As you will learn when you lose a lot of weight, one of the weird things that happens is that people--people you hardly know--begin to have this urge to explain to you why it is they can't lose weight like you have. It's like they think you lost weight to make them look bad and they have to justify themselves. What's frustrating is that they always have lousy excuses, but you can't say anything about it, because that would be rude and tacky. So you just have to smile and say "That really sucks. I'm sorry", when you are really thinking "I didn't care what weight you are, but now that you've brought it up, that's a silly reason".

Of all the silly justifications people give for not losing weight, "I'm scared of loose skin" is perhaps the silliest (though "I'm an emotional eater" is a close second. Who isn't?). You are not one of these people--you are losing weight--but I think you are catching some heat really aimed at them.

thewronggirl
09-16-2010, 08:44 PM
I completely understand that. I was one of those excuses people for a few months while trying to battle through the issues with the loose skin. But I pushed through them enough to move forward with my weight loss and not let it impede progress.

But, like you said, I'm not one of those people now and I don't think I could make it more clear that I'm here to reach my goal weight. Period. I'm perfectly honest when I say that the loose skin issue still weighs heavily on my mind; though more in an "I can't believe I did this to my body" kind of way. It won't stop my progress, but I can't choose what does and doesn't bother me. If others can, that's awesome. I'm not built that way.

Maybe this place needs a "Loose Skin" support group. LOL

neonwildflower
09-16-2010, 08:55 PM
Maybe this place needs a "Loose Skin" support group. LOL

Lol! Love this.

I'll be honest, I misunderstood your first post and got the impression that your motivation was lacking due to a fear of loose skin. I see now that it's not the case, so that's for clarifying your position. I'm nervous about it too, but it's not my biggest concern. I am more concerned about my face changing. My whole life everyone has said what a pretty face I have, and while that's something that people say to fat girls to give a compliment without commenting on their weight... it's also true. I do have a pretty face. I have a nice smile, big dimples, and sparkly blue eyes. I worry that as I lose weight I won't be as "pretty" at a glance, that my dimples will disappear or my smile won't look right... it's a concern. Like you said, not enough to outweigh the health benefits of losing weight, or even the overall impression of my body/looks... but it's a concern, and as you said, it's valid too. I think if I thought about loose skin more I would probably start to be very worried about it too, but in the meantime I just try to be as nice to my skin in the hopes it will be nice back to me. I give it lots of tasty water, rub it down with major moisturizers, and don't burn it up in the hot hot sun. Hopefully it appreciates these things and shrinks along with me! *Fingers crossed!*

carter
09-17-2010, 12:05 AM
I think we're having a bit of a misunderstanding.


All right. I do apologize for remarks that were out of line or unnecessarily harsh. Thank you for clarifying, and best of luck to you in your process.

thewronggirl
09-17-2010, 12:11 AM
Well thank you Carter--that's very nice of you. :) Good luck to you as well. I wish I was at 226!

shannonmb
09-17-2010, 09:06 AM
OP, you are totally right about people being in different places on their journey, and in different mindsets based on what their motivation is in the first place.

Even though I'm not quite 40 (getting there quick!), I still think of myself at 30 as young! I was 250+ pounds at that age, but still, I didn't have high blood pressure, didn't have any problems getting around, no pain in my joints, could fit in a restaurant booth no problem, could go for a walk in the park to see the fall leaves, could party like it's 1999 with my friends, in general felt pretty good. My weight was pretty much a cosmetic issue at that time, and I guess it would have almost been a toss-up whether I'd rather be fat or have a bunch of disgusting hangy skin. Probably why I wasn't sufficiently motivated at that time to lose weight. Oh, I did a couple starvation diets here and there, and actually got under 200 once, but obviously it was unsustainable and oh well, I'll just be fat then. I have an awesome boyfriend, tons of friends, a good job, etc.

Fast forward 10 years and 100 lbs, and at 350 and almost 40, my knees hurt all the time. I needed to carefully scope out where to sit at a restaurant, my doc wanted to talk about BP meds, my legs were swollen unrecognizably and were even starting to get that discolored, OMG look to them, I wanted to sleep every chance I got, my house was a disaster area, my 9 year old daughter was living with a substandard mother. My hubby basically had to forget about bedroom festivities, ****, I couldn't even wash myself properly!!!! That comfortably fat girl I was when I was 30 was gone, and it was pretty gradual, so I don't even know how it happened. I was still the same person inside, and still doing all the same things, but it finally caught up with me -- something I guess I didn't expect to happen!

Obviously based on that perspective, loose skin seems like a very small price to pay to lose weight. I will go as far as to say that I can't wait till I'm flapping my loose skin all over the place! Loose skin, bring it!!! :carrot: I already feel 150% better after losing just 40 lbs, and I can't WAIT to feel how much better I will be feeling after 50, 100, 150 more!

You are so right about perspective. And congrats on owning your feelings about it and pushing forward now! You can do it, and it will be SO worth sparing yourself what some of us have had to go through to finally wise up! ;)

thewronggirl
09-17-2010, 12:08 PM
Thanks Shannon. And you know, one of the things that unconsciously triggered this final move to lose weight (and I've since realized) was sitting down in a recliner and realizing it was difficult to get out of it. I felt like the girl in Willy Wonka who turns into a blueberry (I think it was a blueberry)...just a giant ball trying to get a rolling start to get out of a chair. It was horrifying! My joints do hurt and I do want to spare myself that and actually be able to live while I'm young. And by live I mean be happy with who I am and what I look like...the entire package.

Regardless, I'm feeling much better about the situation, though I do expect to have a relapse of self pity on a regular basis. LOL...I'm fine with that as long as it doesn't get me off track. As of today I've officially lost 10.2 pounds so I'm well on my way!!! :)

I admire your (and others') perspective about the loose skin so much. It does help me work through this even though I am nowhere near that type of acceptance.

ma26
09-17-2010, 12:23 PM
Something to think about. Your still young enough that your akin should still have plenty of elasticity and collagen. So likely it will do a good job of bouncing back. Now maybe this will will motivate. But the longer u wait to lose the more likely you have more stretched skin issues!