100 lb. Club - So far, so good

View Full Version : So far, so good

09-11-2010, 05:48 AM
I'm surviving the mother's birthday weekend!
Yes, I know I sound churlish, and I'll be sorry when she's gone ~ but headstuff is headstuff, and it's still a struggle.

Anyway, yesterday's meal of my meatloaf and carrots mashed with philly went down well. I was polite but firm in the face of repeated offers of shortbread or toffees.

Part of my headstuff is that she brought me up to be ashamed of being fat while at the same time stuffing me full of food and, when since ever I was old enough to have an opinion, being offended if I turned down any food offered.
Part of my headstuff is that I do not, not, not want to tell her I'm dieting. I can't describe why, beyond saying it would make me feel too vulnerable. Controlling my weight is my personal secret. Hm.

I did pray that God would sit on my lips, so that I don't say anything exasperated; and preferably in my heart, so that I wouldn't even feel exasperated. The former is working so far, the latter not so much. :dizzy:

I've forgotten (genuinely!) the yogurt for today's meals. This means I'll get a 30 minute walk in to get it, plus that's 30 minutes in my own space. Should be good.

Oh, and the weight is moving again, down to 182.7. I can just about see the foothills of the 170s on the horizon!

Have good days, all.

09-11-2010, 06:06 AM
Sounds good, Rosinante - I have no idea what's going to happen with me over the next couple of weeks weight-wise, so I'll watch and cheer you on. :)

09-11-2010, 07:26 AM
Sounds like you are making things go splendidly. :)

09-11-2010, 07:42 AM
Cheering for you from here.

09-11-2010, 07:43 AM
Hang in there Rosinante - you're doing great! It's difficult to turn down food from relatives (I have the same problem when I go to my Dad's in New Brunswick - every other house in town contains relatives, and they all want you to eat something!). Just oohh and aah about how wonderful it looks/smells, be firm in refusing gracefully and remember the big picture -- the one in which you get thinner and healthier!

09-11-2010, 10:42 AM
Thanks, guys.
Got a nice, long yogurt walk in.

My nerves are all jangly and braced, and I would normally eat a giant bar of chocolate. I'd prefer not to angst-eat at all but I've bought myself some cheese strings, less than 70 cal each, for if I get really desperate!

Lunch achieved. Phew.

09-11-2010, 01:06 PM
I am glad that things are going well. Having a plan can make such a difference. Your weight loss is going so well now. I am happy for you!

09-11-2010, 02:09 PM
Sounds like your planning is working for you. Nice bonus getting the walk in and the me-time!

09-11-2010, 02:12 PM
You're going to be just fine :) You've got a plan, you're prepared, and while you're only human you're obviously patient!

:hug: You can do this!

09-11-2010, 03:51 PM
I feel a bit guilty that it's such hard work ~ surely families should just be able to Be? However, getting there.

09-12-2010, 04:27 AM
Oh well done!

Is today a work day for you? Will that help at all?

Hope other members of the family are helping out.

09-12-2010, 04:54 AM
Yes, today's a work day, which does give me a breather.

The rest of the family are driving up country or down country accordingly to the Big Lunch at 14:30. At a carvery, so I can have meat and clean veg. I've downloaded their calorie listings, so might go to half a Yorkshire pudding!
Tonight: hearty soup and crunchy bread (me no bread) and birthday cake ~ surely they won't want much after a giant meal?

One branch is staying until tomorrow lunch time : steak casserole with dumplings; cassatta and end of birthday cake, which, again, takes the pressure off a bit.
Then Tuesday it's just me again, until Wednesday mid-morning.

I wish I were a good enough daughter Not to have all this headstuff but at least I'm a good enough daughter not to let it show! :)

09-12-2010, 07:09 AM
I wish I were a good enough daughter Not to have all this headstuff but at least I'm a good enough daughter not to let it show! :)

That's it. That's the bottom line. Avoiding the headstuff is not possible - not letting it show - that's the tricky part - and you are doing it masterfully. :smug:

09-12-2010, 07:55 AM
I find sometimes in hindsight that the anticipation stressed me out more than the actual family events. You're planning ahead and staying on track. Hang in there, and try to get in some more "me" time!

09-12-2010, 09:40 AM
Thanks, guys!

I'm having a me 5 minutes.

Just got in from church. hoovered the floors of dog hairs, fed and pooped dogs, done the spare washing up, rearranged sitting room back into a sitting room (mo. sleeps down there, her choice), just re-done the make-up, about to get dressed ~ but I can manage a 5 minutes.

Guess what I fell asleep doing last night? Running through my wardrobe of retrieved clothes, trying to decide what to wear for today's celebration! Wow! ;D

09-12-2010, 07:50 PM
Still plodding on.
Meal out - check! Lean beef, plain veg., 1 Yorkshire pudding and a Tbsp gravy. Fizzy water to drink (never keen to waste cals on alkyhol), black coffee after. Back home to the veg soup (virtually cal free) - others ate wedges of bread and butter, I didn't. They'd been snacking on cake all afternoon but I had my 2oz wedge then ~ so it looked like I was being as indulgent as the rest.

Ankles totally waterlogged - I usually put them up in the evening but no room tonight. Hope they go down overnight. Otherwise, all good. Now for tomorrow.

Night, all! :kiss:

09-13-2010, 04:27 AM
So the next day begins. Been up a couple of hours, fed the dogs, fed me. I'm not weighing today ~ it's too difficult with a houseful of guests. My pattern is bathroom, breakfast, BATHROOM, scales; and the scales bit involves taking off all the clothes I've just had to put on to move round the house with decency, and I might have to save the Big Bathroom Moment for later in the day when everyone else is up/gone downstairs: yes, another phobia is Bathroom Audibility.....

Never mind, even without the scales, I was so psyched by yesterday's weight that there's No Way I'll be cheating today! (Please remind me of this later! Today is the steak casserole with dumplings + cassatta day! :O )

09-13-2010, 12:30 PM
Food ok - delicious too - but to accommodate guest meals, which are more calorie dense than I'd normally eat, I've had to stick to just 3 meals, not smaller meals and snacks; my insides really don't like this, they just sit there going, Ow! I'm full.

All family gone now except mother. I'm dying to put my feet up for a little doze ~ but I don't do sleeping in front of her either. I know I'm weird. I only resolved the bathroom situation this morning - by going to church! I pretended I had to collect sthg .... goodness knows how I'm going to manage my Israel trip, where I'm sharing a room for a week!

09-13-2010, 01:07 PM
You're making me tired! LOL! I had family over yesterday just for the day and they about wore me out. I saw how silly I get when I watched my brother do something I often do. He and my husband were leaving to take the boys fishing, but their car was blocking our car. The decision was made that we would drive. He started pacing the kitchen and fussing over nonsense and finally muttered under his breath "but our car is in the way, we're going to have to move it and then we'll have to drive it back in." His wife said, "Yes dear, we can move the car. Relax." He was preplanning the "event" of moving the car. He probably thought about it longer than it actually took to DO it! That's so me!

I don't manage lengthy visits well and my mom and I definitely have some "headstuff" going on! Only she doesn't know it! :rofl:

09-15-2010, 09:35 AM
Phew. Family left Monday, took mother home today.

the visit was successful: everyone seemed to enjoy it, she had a great birthday, I stuck on plan. I finally had a mental shift, and instead of feeling guilty because *I* find her annoying (sometimes), I realized that she *is* annoying (sometimes) (aren't we all?) - I could deal with that, rather feeling this huge baddaughterness. Like Eliana, my mom doesn't know I have headstuff! She ate big meals, tons of cakes and sweets ~ on the one hand, she's 90, why not? on the other hand, she has really dodgy digestion, so I lose sympathy at self-induced upheavals.

She lost her temper once, when I refused the million calorie shortbread for the 45th time, so I put a piece up on the mantlepiece. The dogs enjoyed it when I got back.

All in all, it was much better than I'd expected. Phew.