[kellost]

So, my husband and I have lost this weight together. We gained all the weight together, and have lost it together, and he has lost just about the same amount as I have. We talk about food, weight loss, exercise, and our desire to stay healthy pretty often. Over the weekend, while talking about keeping the weight off, we were trying to brainstorm and think of ANYONE we knew who lost this much weight and kept it off. ANYONE. We thought of NO ONE!

We had known plenty of people who lost weight, but gained it all back. We honestly don't know too many people who have dropped 80 pounds or so, though. So this was a very scary thought! No one we know has been able to maintain weight loss! We know nobody who has lost this much weight, which makes us kinda rare, I guess. I told my husband that the only people I "know" who have kept the weight off are some of you here on 3FC! That's it!

I know all the stats about the small number of folks who can keep weight off long-term. Heck, I've even hit my goal this summer, only to go on vacation and gain a few pounds back. It's tough! But when I look at the facts, it's also scary! How can NO ONE I know have gone through this? You feel kind of alone in your journey when you see it this way. But at least I have my husband, and at least I have these boards!

Anyone else ever feel this way? Like you are a freak of nature that you've been able to lose the weight and keep it off? Or like you are just destined to gain it all back, because the stats show it to be nearly impossible? I am so determined to keep this weight off....and I will, but against what odds???

[miamimelting]

I know...I've been battling the same thoughts! 95 out of 100 people gain the weight back. I really believe its because they do not wrap their hands around the psychological aspects of over-eating. If you don't figure out why you do it then how can you stop it from happening again? I think most of us know how to eat correctly, but end up choosing not too. You've got to figure out your triggers! The 5% who take the time to dig in psychologically will win the fight.

[mandalinn82]

You know, 95% MAY regain the weight...but it isn't as though those people are chosen by random lottery, with fate deciding who the "lucky 5%" might be. Those numbers include people on fad/crash diets, they include people who go "on a diet" with the intention of going back to their old ways as soon as they hit a goal, etc.

The 5% who keep it off aren't random. Just look at the National Weight Control registry...there are consistencies between people on the registry that show what leads to long term success - regular exercise, regular weigh-ins, eating breakfast, and continuing to consume a low calorie diet.

So yes, the numbers can be intimidating if you look at them like a lottery...but it isn't. It's a choice to continue the habits that are common among that 5%.

[kaplods]

Even if the statistics are accurate (95 to 98% do not keep the weight off, and of those with wls the odds are perhaps 50 to 60% and getting better with better procedures). So the odds are that you do know people who have done it and will continue to meet people who have done it, or will do it.

But people aren't going to introduce themselves to you with "Hi, I lost 80 lbs and have kept it off for x number of years." They're not going to wear a t-shirt with their before picture on it (but hey, that would be kind of cool).

The stats don't talk about the people who've struggled with their weight all their lives - but have managed to start the struggling before they became overweight or even obese - so they never get included in the weight loss studies.

Also the weight loss statistics don't count the people who've done it at home - they only count the people in programs (because you can't count the people at home - they're not offering themselves up to be counted).

Also statistics tell you (approximately) how many people do it, not how many CAN do it.

About 92% of people in the USA do not have master's degrees (I do, so if I've beat that statistic, weight loss isn't much behind).

About 97% of people in the USA do not have a doctorate degrees (I certainly don't see that as impossible for myself, so why would I consider weight loss beyond my grasp).

The odds are against you only if you do what most people do (and when it comes to weight loss, what most people do is give up).

Are you planning on giving up because it's what everyone else does? Or do you know that you can choose to be different from the rest? Do you know that as long as you monitor and work at controlling your weight, the pounds can't sneak onto your body without you noticing? Are you going to gain it all back and some extra for good measure before you do something about it? Or are you going to have an action in place, and begin it immediately when you see a small regain on the scale?

I don't think weight loss is impossible - and I don't think the statistics lead that way either. The statistics don't tell us anything we (those of us who've struggled with our weight for years) don't already know, and that isn't that weight loss is impossible, it's that the way it's usually done doesn't work.

So to a degree you do have to be willing to be unusual. I would like to get my doctorate degree - but that wouldn't make me a freak (of nature or otherwise), and I don't think losing weight does either.

In some ways I've already beat the odds in terms of how long I've maintained some of my weight loss. I've definitely broken my previous record (but a huge degree) in terms of how much weight I've lost, and how long I've gone without regaining.

It is important to remember that you're using a skill that most people don't (whether it's because they can't, won't, or don't know how), only you can decide whether to keep using that skill or to give up.

"Keep doing what you're doing," isn't that imposing or impossible a skill is it?

[nationalparker]

The 95% figure that's commonly used about people who lose weight and cannot keep it off was covered in depth in a New York Times article more than a decade ago. This figure, from 50 years ago, is not accurate - it was based on a study of only 100 people by one clinic. Link:
http://www.nytimes.com/1999/05/25/he...r-do-they.html

So don't stress about that figure - don't worry about other people and what they can/can't do. Just eat as healthy as you can and be as active as you can. That's what you're in control of.

[Eliana]

I have always been very optimistic and feel like I'm unique. So why not in weight loss too? I will beat those odds!

BUT...I also have a plan. How many people in the midst of weight loss have a maintenance plan? I've learned a lot about how I put this weight on and the biggest lesson learned was that I was more sedentary than I thought given the calories I was eating. It really was about calories in vs. calories out.

I will weigh every day. I don't see how I can bury my head in the sand if I weigh every day.

I will exercise at my base of 3 days cardio and 2-3 days of strength training. It just feels good.

I will restrict my calories.

[Hickory0305]

Yeah, I agree that statistic is a lot of fad dieters. We are people who are changing our lives and have maintenance plans, so we WILL succeed and we'll make that percentage start to grow!

[kellost]

Originally Posted by kaplods

About 92% of people in the USA do not have master's degrees (I do, so if I've beat that statistic, weight loss isn't much behind).


"Keep doing what you're doing," isn't that imposing or impossible a skill is it?

Thanks for all the comments, Kaplods! I, too, have a master's degree, so this is something I'm going to remind myself of next time I'm having doubts! I can beat odds! LOL.

There are a lot of positive things that my hubby and I have going for us, but it sometimes feels overwhelming when you realize hardly anyone else has done what you have done. I need to be confident in the skills I've learned, but cautious, too, because I absolutely could gain it back if I'm not careful. I know that I can never, ever, go back to the unhealthy eating I was doing for years and years before losing this weight. I know I can never ignore my scale again (because there were YEARS where I refused to face the facts of the scale). I know I need to keep being active, and keep watching what I eat. I know that I will probably have food issues, FOREVER!

I think I've become almost over-informed (if there is such a thing) about the ins and outs of weight loss. But reading new healthy recipes and researching about health, in general, has become a new passion of mine. Which is good, I guess. Having the support of my husband, and me supporting him, is probably the biggest positive in our lives. Neither one of us wants to lose what we have done, so we are helping each other to beat this thing!

Just want to say thanks to everyone for the positive thoughts. Self-esteem and self-belief has always been a struggle for me, and it's no different now. I need to just believe I can do it. I already know what to do, so I need to keep on doing this thing. I will never give up...that is something I know for sure. I'm too stubborn and too determined this time.

[Eliana]

My only problem with the master's degree analogy is that once you earn it...you can't lose it. Just saying. We have to be more vigilant with the weight loss maintenance. It's good to know these statistics and even better to vow to beat them.

[Karen925]

Howdy,
When I was losing, I made 3 promises
1. Weigh every day I am at home
2. Measure what I eat
3. Record everything I eat
4. Plan what I eat. This is particulary important if I am traveling or in the midst of a social whirlwind.

If I do these things, the weight cannot sneak back on me. Isle of denial is not my friend. I gained my weight not doing these things.

[Lori Bell]

I know what you mean, totally. Though, I actually know many people who have lost a lot of weight...via wls (several) , WW, Jenny Craig, and TOPS. Anywhere from 50 to around 160 pounds. Only one of them have kept off ALL of the weight (75 pounds), and she just met her personal goal about a month ago, which is several more pounds than her WW goal... Not one of the rest have kept it all off, and just a few are still holding on to that last couple of pounds that they haven't found back. Most have gained it all plus. It really is scarey, and sad to tell you the truth. I've lost weight tons of times before this time and I always gained it back...PLUS many more.

We were at an annual golf tournament on Saturday for the volunteer fire dept. in our area. My hubby is a fireman and I'm on the auxillary. During the golf tounmanet I helped serve lunch again, as I did last year. Last year I was at goal and I recevied tons of compliments and wow's from the player, who hadn't seen me since the previous year. Many did not reconize me until they saw me with my husband. THIS YEAR, still at the same weight, you should have heard how many people commented again...but this time in TOTAL amazement that I had kept it off. You would have thought they thought I did win the lottery. So even though I don't personlly know anyone who has lost a huge amount of weight and kept it all off for over a year...THEY DO! And I plan to keep it that way! And yeah...I do kind of feel like a freak being one of the thinest women instead of THE FATTEST!...NOT!

[losermom]

I too worry about gaining some or all of this weight back. The statistics do not give me much hope. But like others I did work really hard at learning about maintenance and establishing healthy habits for the rest of my life. I do weigh myself everyday. I do exercise 9-10x a week for 6 days a week. I do drink lots of water. I do get plenty of rest. I do plan my meals. My focus is to continue to feel good. By doing of of these things I will continue to feel good.

Also, I have to remind myself that I did maintain a 65 lb weight loss for ten years prior to regaining 15 lbs, which kick started this final journey to the here and now. I maintained that weight loss by somewhat regular exercise and eating pretty much whatever I wanted. This time around I exercise more, eat better and feel better all around. Every day is the opportunity to treat my body the very best that I deserve.

[sacha]

There are other factors too. I also "gained it all back" when I was pregnant (I gained 40lbs), I'm now 13lbs from goal and that original weight.

Most of the times we slip up, sometimes we can't help it (pregnancy, medical issue, medication), the important part is that you remember how you got there in the first place and get back.

Of course, the best thing to do is to not gain back - of course. But if it happen, it's important not to forget that you've done it before. It can be done again. It's when you gain a little back and go "whatever, I give up!" ~ is when the problem begins.

[Robin41]

I never even considered that statistic when I was losing. Statistics tell you what will happen to large groups of people, not to individuals. I just have to worry about me and that I continue to take the right steps to keep the weight off; the other 99 are not my problem even if I do wish them all well.

[Onederchic]

Originally Posted by Brown

I think this is exactly why it's important to choose a way of eating that you can maintain long term, and NOT look at as "being on a diet".

I agree.