100 lb. Club - Ok, this is not the way to cross the 100 lbs. lost goal




caryesings
08-10-2010, 11:18 PM
I just got home from 2nd date with new guy. Both Saturday night and tonight we had dinner for 3 hours. I've done reasonably well with the entree that I had decided on ahead of time by checking out menus on line, but sociably shared an appetizer and dessert with him both times. Didn't lose my head, but definitely no calorie deficit by end of Saturday or tonight.

Ah well, extra time at the gym tomorrow. This guy so far seems worth a little extra sweat time.


ubergirl
08-10-2010, 11:50 PM
Nice! Glad you had fun!

Windchime
08-10-2010, 11:55 PM
Excellent! He must be a pretty nice guy....two dates in less than a week. :)


tryn2bfit
08-11-2010, 12:06 AM
woohoo for dates! you can make up for it in the gym :)

Cglasscock1
08-11-2010, 12:16 AM
Sounds like he's worth a little extra workout time!
Dating at age 50 --- is it very different than it was at age 20? Share -- if you dare!

caryesings
08-11-2010, 08:48 AM
Dating at age 50 --- is it very different than it was at age 20? Share -- if you dare!

You're not kidding sister, and the last time I dated was in my 20s.

First, how to find a date has changed. There was no internet dating services then and now it seemed like my only option to find single 50-somethings.

The things about it I like:
- the way you can screen for the things that are most important to you before getting infatuated with someone.
- rejections are gentler, both when I wasn't interested or when man on the other end decided not to go any further in the process (but I did notice that even like real life 25 years ago, if I decided not to go any further I would tell the person I was corresponding with that I wasn't interested in taking process further where the men, with one exception, just stopped chatting).

What I don't like about internet dating:
-Feels a bit like catalog shopping so both myself and a potential date can keep looking for a "better" match rather than working at making a connection.
-I've always found talking to someone socially a bit difficult and was afraid that after chatting on line, then phone calls, then finally when meeting face to face that I would have nothing left to say.

How the actual date has changed since I last dated 20 years ago:

- I was able to tell my date how talking on a date was a bit stressful for me.
- Better body confidence. I'm currently the same size I was in my 20s when I remember being very self conscious about my fat parts. Now I'm still aware of the fact I have parts that could be better, not a worry that date will reject me because of them.
- I'm dating the men they've become at this age rather than their potential they had in their 20's.

So anyone else want to share their midlife dating experiences? I don't have anyone else in my real life that is dating now. They are all either married or given up on the process.

paris81
08-11-2010, 03:59 PM
That's awesome! This is the problem with dating and losing weight--they say that you're supposed to eat on a date because men don't like women who just eat salads, but if you go out a lot, it gets tricky!

motivated chickie
08-11-2010, 04:24 PM
Caryesings, I'm not part of this sub-forum, but I wanted to pop in and say I'm 40 and dating. And, wow, is it a learning experience. It's pretty easy to find dates, but not one of them have converted into a relationship.

I find dates online mostly. I never seem to encounter single guys my age out in the world. I know they exist, but I never meet any. I'm on a free dating site, which has a reputation for attracting odd ball types. I think that's true, but people are odd in interesting ways- artists, activists, free spirits, etc.

There does seem to be a good number of men in their 20s looking for older women. I don't like the term cougar, but I have had a great time dating younger guys. But it can't lead anywhere so I don't seek it out.

In the old days, I used to meet a guy at a party and we'd spark. Nowadays, I don't have that experience. I get a sense that the guys I meet online are a little jaded. Nobody has ever tried to win me with charm and humor. Or maybe they didn't like me and weren't in the mood to be funny.

A long time ago, I decided not to have children. But 75% of the guys I date have kids. So, I may have to amend my childless commitment to being open to being a step mom.

One of favorite parts about modern dating is texting. I have grown to love texting.

Those are my impressions of modern dating at 40.

caryesings
08-11-2010, 06:16 PM
I do admit the fascination with older women has been good for my flirting muscles. I get more inquiries from guys in 30-35 year range than any other group. Now that I think about it, haven't gotten a single inquiry from a 50-something guy. The man I am now dating is 49.

lovemyboy
08-11-2010, 08:30 PM
Enjoy yourself!

JustBeckyV
08-12-2010, 03:37 PM
woot woot - congrats to you!