General chatter - Sexy or Cute? Which are you?




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guamvixen
08-02-2010, 03:00 PM
So...I am at that point where I feel pretty good about myself. My self esteem is where it needs to be, I can resist things that need resisting. However I find myself wondering how the heck do I become "sexy?" I've always been told I was cute. Which is great, cute is fun, but something about "sexy" just seems so inviting. First off, I have no idea how to be sexy, I've done the whole lingerie thing, and felt silly in it, I'm incredibly clumsy, and I seem to make a joke out of everything, being overweight for a while tends to bring out that characteristic in someone so they can learn to laugh at themselves. Maybe I should stop that?

The problem with "cute" is, in my experience, you come off more innocent to other people. Does anyone else have that experience?

Do you ladies consider yourself sexy or cute? What is it about you that classifies you as either? Elaborate please. ;)


momto2girls08
08-02-2010, 03:24 PM
I think I'm cute...I have been told I have a baby face..

hairchick40v
08-02-2010, 03:43 PM
Gotta go with cute too!!! I have wondered too, at what point in your life does that transition happen... I am scared I am gonna go from cute to OLD!!! I am already 38, almost 39 and I have never been sexy!! Even when I look and dress like one of the sexy girls, I just feel uncomfortable and exposed!!! Seriously, I can put on the cleavage showing shirt the high heels, and I will be called pretty, or cute, but never sexy!! I think you are either one or the other... My sister is more of the sexy!! It is something about how you carry yourself... Good luck to you!!! I hope you find your sexy!! I hope I will find mine one day too!!


ChubbyBun
08-02-2010, 03:47 PM
I'm gonna go with cute. Personally I'd rather be cute than sexy anyway. :D

I think people consider me cute because I have small petite facial features and a babyface. And people are weird about my nose. I had a random woman I've never met smile and crack up hysterically at me and then tell me I had the cutest nose ever. Then she asked me if it was mine or if I had it done. lol

I think cute is usually classified as looking and/or acting youthful and pretty. And yeah, people think I'm younger than I am. Which is good!

ps. I've been to Guam and I LOVED IT!

ThicknPretty
08-02-2010, 03:57 PM
Well, it feels kind of weird to say this about myself...but of the two, I'd have to say sexy. I don't think anyone has ever referred to me as cute (as a teen and adult). I don't have small, dainty facial features...or a small dainty anything, actually. I have prominent cheek bones and dark features and a big everything (seriously...big lips, big nose, big forehea, big boobs, big butt...sigh). I just don't think I would qualify as cute.

So, I guess I'm the first to vote herself sexy! Lol.

CrystalZ10
08-02-2010, 03:58 PM
Sexy! I got curves that my husband loves and it makes me feel totaly sexy. You don't need lingerie to feel sexy either. Just being comfortable in your own skin and happy with who you are makes you feel more sexy than any kind of skimpy jammies could. :)

getnslim
08-02-2010, 04:07 PM
I've always been "cute" at best, never sexy. I wouldn't even know where to start in trying to be "sexy".

Eliana
08-02-2010, 04:11 PM
Guam, dear...you are sexy! :D When my husband has happened upon your picture, like your avatar there..I hear "Oooh-lah-lah". ;)

Me? Cute all the way. When I dress up with cleavage and heels, I feel like a little girl playing dress up. :dizzy: Not what I'm going for. I can not pull off sexy.

But my husband thinks I'm sexy...so it's all good.

guamvixen
08-02-2010, 04:26 PM
What great perspectives! Thank you all for the feedback! I wish I could know what "sexy" feels like. Maybe I need a lil more confidence. When men check you out, does it make you uncomfortable? I'm still trying to figure that one out. I'm not used to some of the attention I get, and compliments make me feel a little uncomfortable at times, but I guess I'm still a work in progress. :)

Slim CB
08-02-2010, 04:28 PM
Sexy for me....up to yesterday my BF told me that I was sexy. I suppose its the way you carry yourself. I dont wear revealing clothes but at times I send off this confidence vibe that I guess makes me look sexy.

TJFitnessDiva
08-02-2010, 04:32 PM
I think a woman can be both :)

kaplods
08-02-2010, 04:47 PM
Cute and sexy are NOT mutually exclusive. A lot of guys find cute very sexy. Cuteness is sexy, silliness is sexy, dramatic is sexy, bossy can be sexy, out-of-character can be sexy (if you're usually serious about sex, switching once in a while to silly - or vice versa can be sexy).....

I have a lot of facets to my personality (and most of them are sexy). I can use makeup and clothing to go in many different directions, and I like the variety. I'm comfortable in many different skins.

I did learn, though that cute is often underated. My husband responds to cute and silly more than dramatic/serious sexy (maybe too much pressure? I'm not sure).

I was a little disappointed at first, because I do like sexy lingerie and seductive drama, but it doesn't float hubby's boat. With him cute and silly wins every time. I once did a silly naked dance in only tennis shoes (yes, fat, naked me). I was undressing and while I usually remove my shoes first. I didn't this time. I still had my shoes on when hubby walked in and started laughing because I was wearing nothing but socks and tennis shoes, so I did a silly dance - and he said it was the sexiest thing he'd ever seen (and even though he was laughing, it was so true. Nothing gets him in the mood like me wearing nothing but bulky running shoes).

Hubby and I are kids at heart, so our sexy tends to be funny, silly, big-kid, "cute" stuff. I once brought washable Crayola markers to bed, and we drew "tattoos" on each other.

Sexy comes in many flavors, and cuteness is definitely one of them. If you do cute well, then rock that cuteness.

saggzz
08-02-2010, 04:58 PM
Back in the day when I was thinner-like during college--I was sometimes referred to as "the vixen" by a few boys. So, I guess I'd have to say sexy.
I'm still not sure why they called me that, but I think it's kind of funny.

funnycanadiangirl
08-02-2010, 05:03 PM
I definitely would say cute. And I'm definitely good with that. The other day, one of my oldest friends (who happens to be a dude) was trying to help me feel a little bit better about myself by telling me I was sexy, but it just sounds funny. I'm all for the heels and the hair, but I don't feel sexy, I just feel like me, but with heels on. :)

So I put myself in the comfortable, girl-next-door, approachable cute category with a smile!

guamvixen
08-02-2010, 05:04 PM
Looking back, I'd have to say that my fiance' responds more to my "cuteness" rather than the times I've sported some sexy lingerie outfit. I guess I never noticed that he prefers cute to sexy. So you all are absolutely right, I need to work my cuteness, and I guess I'd only have a problem if he preferred sexy to my cute. haha, Who needs therapy when I've got you ladies!?!? Thanks for opening my eyes!

ncuneo
08-02-2010, 05:08 PM
Gosh, I just don't know...if I had to take a guess, I think I'm a little bit of both. I've gotten comments in both arenas. I'd say I'd kinda rather be cute because that is less threatening to people. Guys tends to be threatened by women that are overly sexy, IMO.

saef
08-02-2010, 05:21 PM
Not cute.

My personality & likely my age just don't lend themselves to that. I get "elegant" or "attractive." Which I interpret to mean "sexy but not easily accessible -- in fact, somewhat formidable."

They want to thaw the ice princess, pretty much.

That's what scares them. I seemed far more accessible before. Men have told me as much.

DaughteroftheKing
08-02-2010, 05:23 PM
Cute and sexy are NOT mutually exclusive. A lot of guys find cute very sexy. Cuteness is sexy, silliness is sexy, dramatic is sexy, bossy can be sexy, out-of-character can be sexy (if you're usually serious about sex, switching once in a while to silly - or vice versa can be sexy).....

I have a lot of facets to my personality (and most of them are sexy). I can use makeup and clothing to go in many different directions, and I like the variety. I'm comfortable in many different skins.

I did learn, though that cute is often underated. My husband responds to cute and silly more than dramatic/serious sexy (maybe too much pressure? I'm not sure).

I was a little disappointed at first, because I do like sexy lingerie and seductive drama, but it doesn't float hubby's boat. With him cute and silly wins every time. I once did a silly naked dance in only tennis shoes (yes, fat, naked me). I was undressing and while I usually remove my shoes first. I didn't this time. I still had my shoes on when hubby walked in and started laughing because I was wearing nothing but socks and tennis shoes, so I did a silly dance - and he said it was the sexiest thing he'd ever seen (and even though he was laughing, it was so true. Nothing gets him in the mood like me wearing nothing but bulky running shoes).

Hubby and I are kids at heart, so our sexy tends to be funny, silly, big-kid, "cute" stuff. I once brought washable Crayola markers to bed, and we drew "tattoos" on each other.

Sexy comes in many flavors, and cuteness is definitely one of them. If you do cute well, then rock that cuteness.

Awesome! I love your confidence!!

Redredrobin
08-02-2010, 05:30 PM
I have never been "cute". I was never "sexy" until I hit the 30s....I think it has something to do with something on the inside. More of a self confidence than how I look. But that self confidence leads to better outer beauty (clothes, hair, makeup) which make you more sexy! LOL it is a cycle. I have had more heads turn (not a lot, but more) now that when I was a teenager or in my 20s. It also helps to have a boyfriend that tell you that your sexy, but we have only been dating one year. Sexy is from the inside...but its good to be cute, too...

guamvixen
08-02-2010, 05:41 PM
Not cute.

My personality & likely my age just don't lend themselves to that. I get "elegant" or "attractive." Which I interpret to mean "sexy but not easily accessible -- in fact, somewhat formidable."

They want to thaw the ice princess, pretty much.

That's what scares them. I seemed far more accessible before. Men have told me as much.


Hooray! You commented on one of my threads! I love reading your responses! Some are funny, some are too awesome for words! Needless to say, you always make sense! Ice Princess! HA! I love it!

LLH2010
08-02-2010, 05:50 PM
I'm cute Monday through Friday and sexy on the weekends! :) Just kidding, I think I'm a little of both, just depends on the situation. And I think guys like a litte of both. To me sexy is more serious and cute is more playful. I'm mostly cute from what I hear!

Passionista
08-02-2010, 05:54 PM
Do you ladies consider yourself sexy or cute? What is it about you that classifies you as either? Elaborate please. ;)You must think you're a bit sexy, I mean you've called yourself a VIXEN! ;)

Sexy is as sexy does...no need to have props or such...a woman who enjoys herself and her partner is sexy, as is!

I'm gonna go with cute. Personally I'd rather be cute than sexy anyway. :D

I think people consider me cute because I have small petite facial features and a babyface. And people are weird about my nose. I had a random woman I've never met smile and crack up hysterically at me and then tell me I had the cutest nose ever. Then she asked me if it was mine or if I had it done. lol

I think cute is usually classified as looking and/or acting youthful and pretty. And yeah, people think I'm younger than I am. Which is good!

ps. I've been to Guam and I LOVED IT!People think I am much younger than I am, but I don't get "cute" from people really...except about my nose too! :D

Well, it feels kind of weird to say this about myself...but of the two, I'd have to say sexy. I don't think anyone has ever referred to me as cute (as a teen and adult). I don't have small, dainty facial features...or a small dainty anything, actually. I have prominent cheek bones and dark features and a big everything (seriously...big lips, big nose, big forehea, big boobs, big butt...sigh). I just don't think I would qualify as cute.

So, I guess I'm the first to vote herself sexy! Lol.I think that I'm too big (even when thin) to be called "cute" by most...Don't think I've been referred to as "cute" overall, really...Sexy, yes...even as a "big girl" I'm frequently told that I'm sexy. ;)

ChubbyBun
08-02-2010, 06:11 PM
People think I am much younger than I am, but I don't get "cute" from people really...except about my nose too! :D

Your nose is cute too! "Is it real?!" haha I'm jk. I just think it's weird when total strangers ask you if your nose is real now days. It's flattering, but strange lol.

And yeah, people shouldn't under-rate cuteness. It keeps you looking younger than you are, which is great when you're edging closer to 30 haha. I embrace my cuteness. And like some people said already, cuteness can definitely be sexy as well. I think confidence and personality are the real keys to sexiness. Not so much looks.

kaplods
08-02-2010, 06:37 PM
I think confidence really is key. I do think there's a biological aspect to confidence, but I think it can be learned too. I think I've always been more confident than average. Although I'm not sure it was confidence as much as a lack of fear for the consequences. I am a person who leaped before I looked. I was punished a lot for that lack of self-preservation, but I was also rewarded.

I didn't have as much problem with bullies as even normal-weight peers, because I could think on my feet. I didn't think it through, more often than not, but I responded quickly. In sixth grade a class bully pulled on a necklace I was wearing (imitation ivory elephants) asking if they were my relatives, and I punched him in the eye, and he fell backwards into the class garbage can. If I had thought it through, I probably wouldn't have done it, but it worked. Not only did he stop bullying me, we became sort-of friends (I never could hold a grudge for very long, so I don't know if that's just something I was born with, or something I learned because it's the way my family interacted. Passionate arguments one minute, and going shopping or to lunch 5 minutes afterward).

Confidence attracts people. There was a study done of "following" behavior, and they found that people were more likely to follow the most confident person - even when they knew the person's information was wrong. It doesn't seem to matter if you know what you're talking about or not, as long as you believe it. Even people who know you're wrong, will still follow you.

I've always been luckier in relationships than many of my much more attractive friends, and I can only credit confidence. And it's not so much that I think things will always work out for me, as much as I think that I can handle whatever life throws at me. Although my strength is a weakness too, because I often don't anticipate problems because I wasn't cautious enough to expect them.

I know I'm off-track of the topic of sexiness, but I think "the laws of attraction" are the same for sex as other human interactions. Confidence is extremely sexy, and people are drawn to it, and respond to it.

Crystalynnn
08-02-2010, 06:45 PM
im cute but get me in the right outfit and make up and i feel sexy.

its hard to be sexy for me because im a very quirky and clumsy person as it is. but sexy is about confidence ive been told so ill just try to go with that :]

dragonwoman64
08-02-2010, 08:59 PM
I heard Angelina Jolie say she feels sexy when Brad gets the urge for her form. I had a hard time believing there could ever be a moment when she *didn't* feel sexy, but go figure.

I'd say sexy over cute for me. I think part of that is internal mindset, how I'm looking at men and the world. Being comfortable with my sexuality. Though I have my moments of body hang up.

Ciao
08-02-2010, 09:01 PM
It depends for who. I've been told I'm
always adorable, which I'm fine with. I like
being adorable and cute. I don't like acting
hot, sexy, etc. around my friends (basically,
I don't wear skimpy clothing nor do I reveal
much of my skin).

But towards my fiancÚ I'm sexy. I switch
into a totally different mode when it comes
to him. Mostly because he knows I'm not
the innocent girl my friends see. But he also
likes that I can be adorable and cute as well.
I don't want to be sexy or seen as sexy for/by
anyone else BUT him.

JennieLovesKisses
08-03-2010, 12:44 AM
I have ALWAYS been called "cute". People say I have a "baby" face...even that I look like a little anime character because I have big eyes and a little nose and mouth. I don't mind it too much. I'd be nice to be called sexy once in a while though haha

lolcat
08-03-2010, 12:54 AM
Well, I certainly don't feel either at this weight, but I've been called both.
I've been told I have a cute smile, or I'm cute when something pleases me.
When I'm small, I feel so much better about myself that I carry myself differently. I've been called sexy then (and I've felt sexy then!!

SarahD140
08-03-2010, 01:16 AM
I'm totally both. I like it that way. :)

Cglasscock1
08-03-2010, 02:28 AM
I think cuteness or sexiness emanates from the inside and is expressed by a person's choice of the way they present themselves to the world through their appearance and personality. If you think about actors, they change personalities for each role by varying their hair, weight/build, makeup, choice of clothing and the way they act.
When I need to, I can look very professional and tone down my act. But left to my own choices, I'll always choose sexy. My hair is very blonde, I wear red lipstick and eye makeup every day, higher heels and boots, animal prints and flowy floral blouses, leggings, and lots of jewelry that I design. I seldom do sporty clothes unless I'm going to the gym. My outward appearance is a reflection of my artistic talents and my confidence in myself. It's who I am and changing my ways would surely suffocate me.
But I've always thought being petite and cute has its charms as well ... and I think athletic is another type that is very attractive in women.

guamvixen
08-04-2010, 02:15 PM
I think cuteness or sexiness emanates from the inside and is expressed by a person's choice of the way they present themselves to the world through their appearance and personality. If you think about actors, they change personalities for each role by varying their hair, weight/build, makeup, choice of clothing and the way they act.
When I need to, I can look very professional and tone down my act. But left to my own choices, I'll always choose sexy. My hair is very blonde, I wear red lipstick and eye makeup every day, higher heels and boots, animal prints and flowy floral blouses, leggings, and lots of jewelry that I design. I seldom do sporty clothes unless I'm going to the gym. My outward appearance is a reflection of my artistic talents and my confidence in myself. It's who I am and changing my ways would surely suffocate me.
But I've always thought being petite and cute has its charms as well ... and I think athletic is another type that is very attractive in women.

Excellent explanation. I'm getting me some red lipstick!! Thanks!

PinkHoodie
08-04-2010, 05:36 PM
I'm both! I can be cute, but I can also be sexy. I really think a lot of it is your attitude and how you portray yourself. I have to say I usually reserve sexy for hubby, but I think accepting who you are, the shape you are, your heart and soul, and maybe showing off the parts of your body you love the most lead to sexy. But I am way more often cute then sexy because its just my personality.
Is this even making sense?? LOL