100 lb. Club - ARGH I hate my skewed mental body image




vicolisted
07-30-2010, 02:01 AM
I was looking at....


salsa chip
07-30-2010, 06:31 AM
I don't know, but I can definitely relate :hug:

People tell me I look so much better now than a year ago, but often I just don't see it!

I guess it'll get better with time :)

Eliana
07-30-2010, 07:19 AM
So many of us struggle with that. I was the same way and am trying not to have that mindset this time. I've always managed to drop a few pounds, like 30, but I've never seen the difference until after the fact. AFTER I regain the 30 pounds I see that I was actually looking pretty good and AFTER I lose the 30 pounds I see that I was getting pretty fat. It's insane.

This time I'm realizing that at 170 pounds I'm looking pretty good and what I have achieved IS so worth maintaining. If I stop here there will be no shame in my accomplishment. But I have to work on that because yeah...I see the fat thighs especially and the fat tummy pooch. But I also no longer have an enormous rear end or bosom.

Pictures help a lot and I'm no longer hiding from them.


kallismom
07-30-2010, 07:21 AM
I don't know either, but I am the same way. Hopefully, once we reach goal weight and maintain it for awhile we will be able to see with open eyes!

Zinger
07-30-2010, 07:28 AM
Body image is so tough to overcome, to see, and to acknowlege. I struggle with it all the time. We took a vacation last summer and there were a couple of pics in there with me, and I didn't like the way I look. Now I always told myself, that I'm okay in my skin, but when I see the pictures, I don't like what I see. My husband wants the 120 girl he married back, which I look at and say, 'thats too small', yet, I still don't know. I just want the 140 goal right now.

Zinger~

Essa415
07-30-2010, 11:00 AM
I can totally relate. Back when I was 190 I was contantly scrutinizing myself (my BF at the time didn't help the situation). I am back up to almost my heaviest, but lots of time I will put on a cute outfit and feel like a million bucks, but then look back at pictures and cringe. I know self confidence is a good thing to have but sometimes I feel like I may feel too good sometimes and I should come to realize that I am a lot bigger than I think I am and "scale" back. I would kill to have my self confidence I have now with the 190 lb body I had a few years ago.

Coondocks
07-30-2010, 11:20 AM
Im still trying to figure the whole thing out. I still see myself as over 200 lbs, I dont think I look like im at 187 at all, but at the same time there are days when I don't see myself at 187, I think i'm smaller than I am some days then like everyone else, i see a picture and I'm just not happy.
I get like that too when I see other ladies my height at the same weight, to me, they seem to look so much smaller than I think I am and I can't for the life of me figure out how i'm going to look 'normal' with 43 lbs left to go, it doesnt seem like it'll make a difference at all since I'm still not seeing the difference after 62 lbs gone.

Its a back and forth, back and forth kind of mentality

Eliana
07-30-2010, 11:33 AM
Im still trying to figure the whole thing out. I still see myself as over 200 lbs, I dont think I look like im at 187 at all, but at the same time there are days when I don't see myself at 187, I think i'm smaller than I am some days then like everyone else, i see a picture and I'm just not happy.
I get like that too when I see other ladies my height at the same weight, to me, they seem to look so much smaller than I think I am and I can't for the life of me figure out how i'm going to look 'normal' with 43 lbs left to go, it doesnt seem like it'll make a difference at all since I'm still not seeing the difference after 62 lbs gone.

Its a back and forth, back and forth kind of mentality
I relate to this so much! And yes, I see others at the same eight and weight and wonder what my problem is. But I see NUMBERS of measurements and my numbers are smaller...so why is my perception so skewed?

Screwy isn't it?

girlonfire
07-30-2010, 11:55 AM
So many of us struggle with that. I was the same way and am trying not to have that mindset this time. I've always managed to drop a few pounds, like 30, but I've never seen the difference until after the fact. AFTER I regain the 30 pounds I see that I was actually looking pretty good and AFTER I lose the 30 pounds I see that I was getting pretty fat. It's insane.


YES! This is how I feel to a T. The two previous times I have been successful losing weight(20-30 pounds) I felt HUGE and fat. Once I regained that weight I looked at a picture of me with size 14s practically falling off and I'm like "yes please. Can I be like that again?". I think part of it has to do with my self-esteem and body image: when I'm smaller, my mind tells me "No, you are fat there is no way you can be anything else" and when I'm bigger I don't notice it as much because its like my mind is telling me "Yes, this is how things are supposed to be". It's pretty messed up! Overcoming body image issues is on of the greatest challenges for me during this journey. Good luck to everyone overcoming their body images problems :hug:

P.S. Yay! I just figured out how to quote heh...

starbrite
07-30-2010, 12:41 PM
I think this is the crux of the problem. The way we see ourselves is so influential, and I totally relate to thinking myself smaller, when actually I was fatter, and beating myself up when I was around 180, for the fact that my tummy was like jelly and my arms wobbled !! Somewhere in between that I have begun to think I want to like my body, and be proud of it - whatever size, shape or weight I am. This has really helped in my current weight loss journey, and has made the difference between succeeding and failing.
Good luck - just remember you are beautiful :)

bright83
07-30-2010, 02:58 PM
I feel the same way most of the time...especially what Essa415 said! Everyone keeps saying that its all about self confidence...that I just need to feel like I am hot and pretty. Except when I do...I look at a picture of myself afterwards and realize I looked horrid! That just embarrasses me so much to think I thought I looked hot when I really looked like crap!!!

FannyMae
07-30-2010, 03:32 PM
I think maybe it is because you have worked so hard and spent so much effort and time on getting thin again. I mean think about it in school the paper that you spent the most time one was never perfect but the one you did at the last minutes was fine. We have devoted ourselves so much to losing weight that we want everything to be perfect but all we can see are areas we need to improve where before when we were heavy we weren't as body consciences so we didn't see these areas. Well at least that is the way I think of it. Plus it is easy to gain weight but hard to lose it! Also I don't think it helps that I look back at old pictures and think man what an idiot I am, I thought I was hot stuff right there but look how gross I look, I wont be making that mistake again.

SarahD140
07-30-2010, 11:39 PM
I was delusional about my weight on the ride up. It was fast and I still thought of myself as sexy and curvy. When reality sank in I was 260 ish, got depressed and got bigger, lost, gained, lost gained, gave up and spent at least 3 years on a roller coaster. And even now I have to remind myself that a 5'7" girl at 253 is big, I am proud of my weight loss, but I'm still big. I will keep doing this until I'm no longer huge as to avoid those silly photos... the ones where I think I rock, but I'm more like a blob.

dragonwoman64
07-31-2010, 10:32 AM
Maybe it would help if we took the time to really make a mind-body connection through lots of photos and actually looking at ourselves?

I have been trying this, I look at pics of myself on the computer at different sizes. How I see myself is so all over the place, even when I stay at the same weight. I'd like to find a place where I'm more at peace with it, instead of judging myself by it all the time. I can read other comments where women put down how they look because of their size and realize they shouldn't and that it isn't true, but then I go and do it to myself :o

LitChick
07-31-2010, 12:41 PM
Wow, I didn't realize this was such a common issue. I felt so abnormal about my body image issues for the longest time! When I was extremely overweight, I saw myself as smaller than I really was (I used to joke that I had 'reverse anorexia' - not to make light of that serious disorder) and now that I am approaching a more 'normal' weight, I find myself looking at my body and thinking I am fatter than I really am. Honestly, sometimes I look at myself and wonder how I could have lost 100+ pounds when I still see it. There are times when I look at myself in the mirror or see photos that I really see the changes, but it's definitely my standard mental image.

Mandaloef
07-31-2010, 12:46 PM
I think that this is something that affects most of us that are overweight. I had a previous weight loss journey during my teenage years where I went from 210 to 130. When I finally got down to 130 I still thought I looked huge. Now that I'm 175, I look back at those pictures and can't believe how skinny I used to be. Sadly, even if I got back down to 130 I would probably feel the same way again. We always are the most critical ones when we look at ourselves. My husband says I'm beautiful now, but when I look in the mirror all I can see is a fatty. I guess that we have to retrain our thinking patterns.

Ciao
07-31-2010, 12:46 PM
I think the same thing at times and I
really have to remind myself that I'm still
growing and my body is still changing.

solo
07-31-2010, 11:44 PM
I can so relate to everyone's posts here: I am shocked when I see photos of me right now, because "no way can I look that big!" yet when I was 150 - 185, I thought I was HUGE... The only way I feel good these days is when I take a walk at certain times of the day and the shadows are long and lean...