Weight Loss Support - Do you or will you tell people...




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ncuneo
07-21-2010, 03:54 PM
...that you've lost weight? When you meet people for the first time, if the situation is appropriate do you or will you tell people you've lost weight? It's obviously something I'm very proud of but at the same time not so much. Sometimes I want to pretend like that person never existed, and sometimes I want to tell every stranger on the street. Just curious how others feel.


successfulhannah
07-21-2010, 03:58 PM
I LOVE telling how much weight I have lost it feels great and also inspires other people to do the same.

Zing
07-21-2010, 04:14 PM
Not when I'm meeting someone for the first time I don't think. Probably, thinking about it, because I don't want them to think of me as fat.
At the moment however, where I'm almost half way through my weight loss journey, I do like to drop into conversation that I've lost five stone, but that's with existing friends and family for the most part. And because quite often some of them don't notice otherwise!


Rosinante
07-21-2010, 04:28 PM
I didn't and won't tell people unless asked. Then I'll very happily share but for one thing, part of my 'normal', which is my dream, is that no-one would suspect I'd ever been anything other; for another thing, unless I knew the other person's situation, I would be very cautious of anything that might sound like a boast. Not AT ALL saying you'd be boasting, not at all; neither would I be - but if the other person was having a really bad day, my weightloss joy could just be the last straw for them.

Ask me though - and you won't be able to turn me off!

Eliana
07-21-2010, 04:32 PM
It depends...I've told cashiers at clothing store. :D I almost feel compelled to do so. I've wanted to tell people at the gym, but I've held my tongue. Other than that, I don't meet a wide range. ;) (If anyone is familiar with "Into the Woods" I now have lyrics in my head. :rofl:)

I don't know. That's a part of me that I wouldn't mind just fading into the background.

men7al
07-21-2010, 04:33 PM
My family and some of there friends are rude and comment when I am fat or too skinny.I am naturally thin..So,I welcome the haters when I do lose the weight without there DIET pills..and When I lose it..I don't need to tell ppl..they know by how your dressed.Who cares what ppl think in the end of day..is what you feel about ur looks..I say if you lost the weight go and get some cute outfits and celebrate it.

astrophe
07-21-2010, 04:43 PM
I doubt I'd tell. Unless it is medically pertinent somehow for a doc to know.

I just don't see the point in broadcasting it -- esp socially to new people I'm just meeting?

A.

goodforme
07-21-2010, 04:44 PM
I don't meet very many new people these days, but when I first started this job I was much smaller than I am now. I never had the urge or inclination to tell anyone, "Well, you should have seen my fat behind last year!" I don't want to be ashamed of fat-me, neither do I want to draw attention that this is not normal-me, this is just right-now-me.

People who knew me then may be thinking on the inside about how I let myself go, but I'm not really into discussing my weight (except on here :o ) so I'm not a big help to you.

I'm a waffler :p

motivated chickie
07-21-2010, 04:49 PM
I've started dating recently and I don't tell anyone I've dated that I used to be much heavier. I mention that I care about fitness and eating healthy, but leave it at that.

guamvixen
07-21-2010, 04:49 PM
I only tell those who are close to me. I don't advertise it right away. I feel like that part of me died, and she's better off left buried and in peace.

saef
07-21-2010, 05:32 PM
In general, no. With these exceptions:

I've told the manager at the gym that I frequent nearly daily, because we often chat together.

I've routinely told medical providers that haven't had an ongoing relationship with me -- it comes up with regard to the diabetes question.

It's not that I'm keeping it a secret, it just usually isn't pertinent & isn't something I'd share in casual conversation.

JayEll
07-21-2010, 05:35 PM
The only person who needs to know is my new doctor.

Of course, some people saw me lose weight, so they know I did. But I moved just after I got to my lowest weight, and haven't told anyone in my new community. It's great! I don't get the questions, people don't watch me eat and ask about it, they just treat me like I'm a "normal person." Love it. I don't consider my weight anyone else's business.

Jay

Shmead
07-21-2010, 05:39 PM
As a teacher, I will be meeting a lot of new people here in a month or so. It'll be a few years before I start getting students who never knew me fat, but there will be new teachers and administrators. Part of me really, really wishes that no one would tell people that I used to be fat--not because I am ashamed of it, but that I hate that it's now officially the most interesting thing about me--like if I'd had triplets, or won the lottery, or was related to someone really famous.

ubergirl
07-21-2010, 05:50 PM
...that you've lost weight? When you meet people for the first time, if the situation is appropriate do you or will you tell people you've lost weight? It's obviously something I'm very proud of but at the same time not so much. Sometimes I want to pretend like that person never existed, and sometimes I want to tell every stranger on the street. Just curious how others feel.

I'm so glad you asked this question! I have a move in the offing and I've been wondering the same thing myself....

I know that when I went on a job interview luncheon with two women, one of the women, who was obese, ordered a reuben with fries and the other, like me, ordered a chicken ceasar-- when the other woman asked if they had light dressing, I indicated that I wanted that too. Then, suddenly, I felt disloyal to the obese woman-- so I blurted out that I had lost (at that time) almost 100 lbs....

It wasn't until later that I realized that I did not need to "explain" to these near strangers why I wanted light dressing on the side. LOTS of women order like that every day of the week.

I find it really hard not to mention it to people-- being fat is still such an integral part of my conception of who I am that it seems strange to me that people could see me as a normal weight person, not a "fat person who lost weight."

I'm going to try to think about it before I blurt it out to every new person I meet.... but especially with obese people, I feel a certain solidarity with them, and I feel like saying, "actually, I'm fat too, you just can't see it any more."

luckymommy
07-21-2010, 06:17 PM
Great question! Well, I've gained and lost the same 50-70 lbs. many times now and I always have blurted out how much I've lost to people I know and even those who I don't know as well. Sometimes, they've asked me too, so that makes it easier. However, now I'm getting back on track (only in the last 4 days) and I've decided to keep this to myself. I kind of think that I've become addicted to the attention that I get from my weight loss. People's reactions to me matter too much and I need to back away from that as much as possible. I'm not going to hide my body but I'm also not going to tell people that I'm counting calories (unless they ask) or that I'm losing x amount of lbs. a month (as if I'm hoping they'll still be my friends and wait for me to look good....sad....but true). So, rather than make announcements and predictions, I'm going to stay low key and focus on my own feelings and journey and stop thinking so much about what others are thinking. :)

Ciao
07-21-2010, 07:12 PM
If it's someone I just met, then no.
But my friends know I've lost weight.
I actually like showing them that for
teenagers you DON'T have to be
bulimic or starve yourself to lose weight.
But I know for young teenagers like
myself they just don't want to exercise
and diet. They don't have that determination.

Lori Bell
07-21-2010, 10:32 PM
As a teacher, I will be meeting a lot of new people here in a month or so. It'll be a few years before I start getting students who never knew me fat, but there will be new teachers and administrators. Part of me really, really wishes that no one would tell people that I used to be fat--not because I am ashamed of it, but that I hate that it's now officially the most interesting thing about me--like if I'd had triplets, or won the lottery, or was related to someone really famous.

Oh Honey, I know EXACTLY how you feel.

"HI, this is my daughter-in-law, she's lost 190 pounds!"
"Hi, this is my sister-in-law, she's lost 190 pounds!"
"Hi, this is my best friend, she's lost 190 pounds!"
"Hi, this is my wife, she's lost 190 pounds!"

Why can't they just say, "Hi, this is Lori, isn't she HOT!!" :D

To nc...I don't need to tell anyone, everyone else does it for me. :o

LitChick
07-21-2010, 10:51 PM
I have the urge to tell people when it's in a situation where weight or fitness is an issue. Like in an exercise class at the gym, and I'm still the heaviest person there, and I get the feeling like everyone else is wondering what my fat butt is doing there, or if I'm out running and people see me and think 'who is she kidding? what is that fat chick doing?' - that's when I want to yell out how far I've come and what I've done. But of course, I don't. And I'm looking forward to the day when I'm no longer the heaviest person and can just blend in. Then I don't think I will feel the need to justify myself to others.

girlonfire
07-21-2010, 11:02 PM
I don't really want to tell anyone. When it was obvious my first go around that I was trying to lose weight, I don't want people to know this time. Puts too much pressure on me. My aunt updates her Facebook status every day with her weight loss and what she is eating for dinner. I don't want to do that.

thundahthighs
07-21-2010, 11:22 PM
Actually, someone I respect and admire is currently embarking on a fitness journey, and she only knows me as a vaguely pudgy fitness fanatic... and I am wondering if I'll ever have the nerve to tell her I started about 5 years ago with 30 minutes of gentle yoga and about 110 more pounds than I have now. If I knew it would help her achieve her goals, I'd tell her in a heartbeat. ****, I'd fly a plane over Coney Island. But I don't know if it would help her, and I don't know if it would be appropriate.

I don't normally tell people that don't know, but it doesn't really tend to come up. I'm also a pretty private person in general...

skygirl
07-21-2010, 11:26 PM
i probably won't tell people. it's really no one else's business, and i am private, and would not like to have attention called to this. exceptions to this might be if someone i trust and feel close to is struggling and i feel like my experience might help them. otherwise, it will remain mine.

Cglasscock1
07-22-2010, 01:44 AM
I would probably choose to not bring it up with new people. In the couple of times that I have told a person that I have lost weight, the first question is always "Really? How'd ya do it?!" Then, I feel compelled to try to summarize one year plus of dieting adventure into a simple sentence, which really is not a good answer. Although I would like to help anyone, I'd probably have to take them to lunch to explain THE ENTIRE TRANSFORMATION THAT I ACTUALLY UNDERWENT. So, unless they're buying me a low cal lunch, I just don't bring it up anymore! :D ;)

kaplods
07-22-2010, 02:11 AM
I'm an open-book, probably WAY TOO OPEN. I share personal information at the drop of the hat. It's a quirk I've had since very early childhood.

I was adopted as in infant (only 1 month old), and I did NOT learn it from my adoptive family, and My loose-lips has been a source of family amusement for as long as I can remember. I don't remember ever not knowing that I was adopted and what that meant - my parents tell the story that from the ages of 3 to 8, I would tell people, especially strangers at almost every opportunity that I was 'dopted - and what that meant (including the part about where babies come from - and that I didn't grow in my mommy's tummy like "regular kids.")

In kindergarten or first grade, I got in trouble for telling my classmates where babies come from - and I filled them in on the details from my "How Babies are Made," book at home (of course most of them didn't believe me).

I haven't really changed much. Just this morning, I met a woman at the warm water therapy pool, and we got to talking. And I shared all sorts of personal details with the woman, including some of my health history, and my weight loss so far. And she shared equally personal information.

And the weirdest part about being an "open book," is how much my open-ness opens other people up. I naturally went into the field of psychology, because even as a teenager, when I shared "too-personal" information, it was in a way that encouraged others to share their personal information too.

I never understood why complete strangers would spill their guts and life stories after only a few minutes of conversation, until I learned that I was opening that door.

I'll probably always open that door. I'll probably always share too much, and it will probably continue to be an asset most of the time, and a drawback some of the time.

Glory87
07-22-2010, 02:21 AM
I moved after I hit maintenance. I tell very few people. My dear friends know, of course.

Natasha1534
07-22-2010, 04:50 AM
I plan on moving in the next year so I will be in a new place where nobody knows me and won't know me as the "fat girl" I have been most of my life. But until that happens, I am going to have to deal w/ everyone talking about it. In my line of work people are always talking about SOMEONE...and I'm just gonna be happy that it's something positive...or at least it SHOULD be!!! My luck the rumor will be that my weight loss is due to a cocaine addiction. LOL

catherinef
07-22-2010, 05:16 AM
Unless there's a specific reason to mention it, I don't. I do tell bra fitters, for example, because that's kind of relevant to them, for example, and I've flat-out told sales clerks in clothing shops that I've lost a lot of weight, and have no idea which size to start with in trying stuff on, and when we get a new doctor, I will tell him or her, because, again, it's relevant, but other than that, unless it somehow comes up and seems important, I do keep it to myself.

Serbrider
07-22-2010, 05:55 AM
When I lose the weight... I'd rather have my fitness and ability and old pictures and friends speak for themselves. I might, if they ask, say HOW much I lost... but as for just telling someone I just met "I lost 70 lbs"... probably not. :p

(not that I think that's exactly how you meant that you'd tell people... ;) )

hope for recovery
07-22-2010, 06:25 AM
I would. Especially somehow friends who are overweight because it might be motivational to them. I do however worry that it might sound a bit pushy or arogant if i do that. Well the people who know know me already are starting to see it and to say to me that i have. Sometimes I will say it with fit people as well because i am sharing my joy with them. I won't just bring it up when i meet someone new but if we start talking about food and weight, I would mention it.

I do however try to hide the fact that I am on a diet, it is a bit like I am ashamed of it. Which is not the case. For once in my life I am actually surrendering to an eating plan that was not created by myself and I commit to sticking with it because I admit that eating on my own accord failed. And this is difficult for me to do but the food abuse has got to stop coz it left me carrying more weight than i deserve. And I am challenging myself and I am willing to do something good. So I think I would share about it if brought up in a conversation. It might help someone.

Sharing with friends about my eating problems got them sharing back with me and we felt closer.

TJFitnessDiva
07-22-2010, 07:29 AM
Oh Honey, I know EXACTLY how you feel.

"HI, this is my daughter-in-law, she's lost 190 pounds!"
"Hi, this is my sister-in-law, she's lost 190 pounds!"
"Hi, this is my best friend, she's lost 190 pounds!"
"Hi, this is my wife, she's lost 190 pounds!"

Why can't they just say, "Hi, this is Lori, isn't she HOT!!" :D

To nc...I don't need to tell anyone, everyone else does it for me. :o


Yeap :lol: I don't need to do it...if they are around one of my family members or friends, they usually out me before I can do it. If new people happen to not run into one of my people then I just enjoy the moment knowing that they don't know :)

foxxy511
07-22-2010, 12:31 PM
I usually don't like talking about it with people because I don't want to make that the definition of who I am, "the fat girl who lost a bunch of weight." I just want to be seen as normal! Like Tanee and Lori though, if I'm with my mom, she'll announce it to people as an introduction. I know she does it because she's proud of me, but it's more embarrassing (for me) than anything else. Because then come the seemingly forced comments of "Wow, you look great."

Funny story, I've recently been hanging out with a new friend from school and she never knew me when I was obese, she's only ever known me at my current size. First time she came over to my house, my mom asked if she knew I used to be fat and then asked if I showed her pictures of me when I was fat!! It was awkward all around, I felt embarrassed and quickly tried to change the topic. She's a very thin person, who is blessed with genetics that allow her to eat whatever she wants and not gain weight. Weight has never been an issue for her, so I felt it was an awkward topic to discuss.

I'm starting a new job in August. One lady there knew me before I lost weight, but it was more of an acquaintance, so I don't think she'll go around telling people!

Beach Patrol
07-22-2010, 12:33 PM
If the conversation "leads" to it, I would. But I wouldn't just blurt it out for no good reason. :dizzy:

losermom
07-22-2010, 05:13 PM
Like others, I'm kind of a private person especially regarding weight issues. I don't bring it up unless others do and generally try to keep it private. I have had people introduce/announce my weight loss to total strangers--awkward! I am about so much more than my weight. I will never deny or hide that I was at one time 115 lbs heavier than I am now, but I don't lead with that information. And I will discuss how I did it if asked.

Now talk to me about food, recipes and cooking and I'll talk your ear off...