Age 50+ - Need guidence from my big sisters here on FiftyPlus.

Hermit Girl
07-20-2010, 11:15 AM
Hi kids, I"m not quite 50, but here's the deal : I've got to come up with a plan for life, and in 17 months I will be 50. I am committed to learn how to live healthfully in a 50+ body, starting now, because I have a goal of turning 50 feeling and looking my best.

I have a few things I'm doing right ; I eat mostly whole foods and am doing a SuperFoodsRx make-over in my eating (not into formal diet programs) , and doing a lot of hiking in the woods with my dog where I live, so I'm pretty fit. I have had a recent checkup (pap, mammogram & bone density) last spring, and all is good, have good blood pressure and nothing in particular seems to be wrong ~ However ~ overweight by at least 35, and at the most 55 pounds (not sure where my ' happy weight' is). I am still faced with achey body, mind, and spirit, and grumpy and relationship with DH is stressed to the max. My fat is bringing my whole life down, have done nothing but gain weight since turning 40, (did lose a couple of times but gained back plus more) , I have a very fragile sense of confidence, chronic low self-esteem, horrible physical self image, and I need to change that.

I would like to expect that by the time I am 50, I can have this fat gone for good, and that is less than a year and a half. I have hiked mostlyfor fitness in recent decade, also bicycle a little, and that is all, no weight training or floor exercises (wait, I did try yoga a couple of years ago and strained my back really bad so I'm skittish about it now).

Also, my attitude needs a major overhaul ~ from fatalistic & frumpy... to hopefull and healthy and happy. I know for many menopausal women, it's more than difficult on even the best of days, and I am in the middle of perimenopause. I know that has something to do with why I feel so out of control, but really, I am ready to FaceTheMusic and Own Up (*just want to mention I do not intend to take hormones for my menopause, but am persueing diet-based estrogens like flax, soy, etc). This is where I call on your wisdom and support. Today I am not feeling very hopeful, and I need a hug. :( (my husband doesn't do much of that lately, and I feel so lonely).

I just need someone to grab me, face me in the right direction, and give me a little shove.

07-20-2010, 01:26 PM
Last year, a year before my 60th birthday, I decided to lose weight and tone up before that landmark birthday. I lost about 20 pounds and I can tell you, I really felt rejuventated in mind, body and spirit. I hope you will do this for yourself as well. I got a world of great info here on 3FC and I am on here every day for support. I also read a lot of books on nutrtion and exercise and that gave me a lot of guidance as well. (Especially like the Beck Diet for Life books). If your husband is not supportive, turn to 3FC. You can turn your life around and be happier than you have in a long time. Good luck!

07-20-2010, 09:04 PM
You came to the right place for hugs, understanding, friendship and support. Seems to me that you are headed in the right direction already, or you wouldn't be here, and you even have a plan! Please pop in to the Daily Chat thread, or the Golden Girls thread, and join us. We will help you. :hug:

Hermit Girl
07-22-2010, 08:20 PM
thanks Ladies ! I've discovered the great pampering affect of manicure & pedicure. Oh my gawd. I don't do it for the polish, I do it for the aaaaahhh's. This may sound really weird, but these days since I don't get touched much in an affectionate way by my DH (working on that, in therapy) that the affect of having a pedicure or manicure seems to really make a huge difference !

07-22-2010, 08:29 PM
Hermit Girl, pampering is great! How nice that you did that.

I know people who go for therapeutic massage for the same reason. I've started pampering myself more, and am enjoying that I'm taking better care of myself.

Sending you lots of good thoughts. :goodvibes

08-14-2010, 08:46 PM
Hermit girl, Im also new to this forum and really dont know what im doing. but i have been reading all the stories on weight loss and it helps me to stay focused. i see im not alone. i read your storey and my heart felt for you. i just started counting calories 1000 -1200 a day and i have been getting on my treadmil for a hour everyday. this is my second week. i just wanted to say hang in there girl. im sending you a big hug...

Te Mimiha
09-11-2010, 05:32 AM
Hello Hermit Girl,
I have read some of your posts (there are too many to read them all) and you sound so much like me. I don't know if there is anyway to contact each other directly for some kind of support via this forum, but if there is I think it could be helpful.

I have never read a person's posts and reconised so many of the same issues and same kind of swings before. I have now turned 50 and have been saying all the same things you have. Weight is wrecking my life!

Like you, I am not tall enough to carry any extra and I have slowly gone from a bit chubby, to a bit tubby, to really rather fat. It takes me forever to get dressed in the morning as I can't fit into most of my clothes.

But "times are a changin'".... I don't believe it is ever too late (it can't be, or my future isn't going to be much fun as I can't accept the way I am). Perhaps it would be good to support someone in such a similar position? I can't work out how to PM hence posting.

09-11-2010, 06:30 AM

Read your first post and I can relate. How`s it been going since your last post here?

Here`s a big hug (((((HermitGirl))))))

Hermit Girl
09-15-2010, 10:12 AM
Wow, thanks everybody, especially for the hugs ! I was gone a while, and returned to find my post was fluffed and got attention. Thank you ! Recently I've gotten some interesting ideas as to approach to losing weight, but I'll explain that later, maybe after I've lost two pounds.

My Question : How many calories per day, (also your activity level) do you think is going to work for you to lose weight?



Ti MImiha, thank you especially for making an effort to speak out. PM-ing is fairly easy when you get the hang of it. I tried to PM you, but it's as if you don't have the personal messaging on the site enabled. Maybe check your settings?

09-19-2010, 02:58 AM
I`m trying not to go over 1200 calories a day. It`s hard for me to calculate my activity level because I hate exercise and am not reliable with it but being a "type A", I run around all day and can`t sit still so I think I use up a lot of nervous energy.

In the last month I`ve lost 6lbs - and at 58 with a thhyroid condition and menopausal, I think that I did well. It was only my first month, so I imagine that my weight loss will slow. I will be thrilled with even 1-2lbs a month hereafter (but I will try for 3 LOL) I will continue to do what I did the first month and see how it goes. I think a lot of it is trial and error. Our bodies do change over time and what worked 10 years ago doesn`t work anymore.

The one thing I do find that keeps me focused and on track is to log everything I eat. The first weeks I used a chart that I printed from another member but now I bought an attractive book with blank papers (one that I don`t mind keeping exposed in the kitchen), the scale is right next to it. I make it easy for myself not to get away with laziness to write it down.

I read your other post and saw that you lowered your calorie intake. Keep experimenting, you`ll find what works for you.

10-04-2010, 06:24 PM
Hi Hermit Girl, Well done for making the decision to get things in order now as I can tell you that the older you get the harder it becomes to lose the weight.
I am now 76 and because of the meds I am on I find it horrendously difficult to get the pounds off. Now witha very bad back and virtually totally disabled I rue the days that I have neglected to to get a hold of things, Still, never too late,she says hopefully!!:yes: