Chicks up for a Challenge - Husband Has Donned The Title "temptor"




Lippy100485
07-13-2010, 02:23 AM
So, my husband is trying to "help" he says. This week, this is what he has added to the kitchen (Keep in mind we usually only make 1 dessert a week... and NEVER buy them!) It's amazing how differently our counterparts brains' work.

Freezer: FlavorICE, Firecrackers, 3 TUBS of ice cream
Breakfast Cabinet: 2 Boxes of Choc and Powdered Donuts
On the counter: Lemon Cake with Lemon Icing
On our nightstand: Oreos
In our spice cabinet: Smores ingredients bundled together (with the GIANT marshmallows... not the normal ones... not the mini ones... the GIANT ones),
4 bags of chocolate chips for cookies, and 2 bars of Ghirardelli chocolate for a cake I like to make
In the baking cabinet: 2 Chocolate Fudge mixes with Marshmallow Creme
In snack cabinet: 2 Humongous Bags of Chips
And on top of the fridge: A huge bag of candy

WTHeck? :frypan: I'm dying here. Baking is my life... well a good part of it at least. It fills me with joy to bake and see and taste and share and eat and bake some more the goodness that can come out of my oven. Now he's turned my kitchen into purgatory. :devil: *Returns to biting nails - few to no calories involved* lol :club:


GoldenLeaf
07-13-2010, 02:31 AM
Does he know about your weight loss goals? If he does, have you asked why is he buying this kind of food?

I know how much of a struggle it can be to have a partner that is happy to eat junk... my partner was like that for a long long time and it made my life miserable. Things really only turned around for me when he decided he wanted to get healthy too. He used to say "if you don't want to eat it, then don't, just have some willpower, but I want it so please keep buying it." GRRRRRRRRRRR. Sounds really insensitive, right? I think he was really just CLUELESS though, because NOW he says to me he realises what he was doing was really wrong.

Lippy100485
07-13-2010, 02:46 AM
Rereading my post... I meant to convey my message in a lighthearted smack him upside the head funny kind of way... he's trying to help me learn to resist things at home, so I can do better while we're away.... (I had said something to him about eating over somebody's house)... He is a sweetie and has also stocked me up on some health food stuff (although compared to the rest... it just doesn't look as good lol...) He just has a weird way of helping lol... He and the kids won't even eat half the stuff he brought in... He doesn't bake lol) I think I need to edit my post lol


LLH2010
07-13-2010, 06:03 AM
Show him how good you're doing by throwing it away and calling yourself the "Cleaner"! :)

TornadoSiren
07-13-2010, 05:24 PM
I have to comment..cause it made me giggle.

My husband and children love ice cream. So it is always in the freezer, but for the last 4 months, while he refuses to give up his ice cream, even to make my life a little easier, he always makes sure to buy flavors that I don't care for much, but that they all enjoy. It helps. For mother's day, he went out and purchased a small, single serving of my FAVORITE ice cream (peanut butter and chocolate) opened it..put a spoon it in, and brought it to me. He told me to take 4 bites, then give it back to him..I did..relishing every bite like it was my last meal. Then he proceeded to finish the little dish for me. :dizzy: I guess I can call this support.

Lewisempire
07-13-2010, 07:35 PM
I think I would pack it ALL up and donate it to a local food bank, church, or old age home! No way that could stay in my house. LOL my husband Knows I a an ice cream-aholic, and an Oreo Pirate! He buys and eats his stuff in the truck, or his shop, and I only occasionally see an old wrapper! Good luck, If you can't donate it, find a deep dark recess of your cupboards, one you rarely have to open!

kaplods
07-13-2010, 08:31 PM
he's trying to help me learn to resist things at home, so I can do better while we're away.... (I had said something to him about eating over somebody's house


This makes bout as much sense as hiding landminds on your property, so that you're prepared to encounter them elsewhere. Or bringing hookers into the house so that a philandering spouse can practice fidelity. Filling the house of a drug addict with cocaine.

The most successful tactics for resisting temptation are those that remove you a few steps from the temptation. Learning to resist temptation in a high-temptation situation by pure willpower is actually the least effective strategy (I learned that way back in graduate school for my psych degree in the early 1990's).

Even experiments using kids with candy, found that the kids that resist temptation the best used strategies that removed the tempation from sight (they hid the candy under something so they couldn't see it, or they turned their back on it). Endless variations of temptation studies have been done, and repeatedly the results are the same - the most effective strategies are those that remove either the temptation or the temptee in some way - not those that increase the temptation to provide "practice."


It's an easy mistake to make, so I'm not judging you or your hubby for thinking that "practice" might make sense, but there's so much research proving that this strategy doesn't tend to work very well for the vast majority of people.

I'm sure it's possible to learn that kind of willpower, but willpower (in this sense) expends energy - a lot of it. It requires a super vigilance that takes energy away from other things. Most people do better if they can create an environment in which it takes more energy to succumb to temptation than to resist it. For example, if you have no ice cream in the house, when you get a craving for ice cream, you've got to get dressed, drive to the grocery or ice cream shop.... It's "easier" to stay home - so that's what you'll usually do. However, if three tubs are a few yards away at all times - it makes yeilding to tempation easier than resisting it.

Unless everyone's on the same way of eating, the more people you live with the more temptations you have to live with - but there's no justification for living with more temptation than you have to.

I recently had my husband put all of the foods I have trouble resisting in a large soup pot, and we put it on the top cupboard of the
pantry. I can get it down if I want to, but I'd have to get a step ladder out to reach it - or ask my hubby to get it down for me.

It's worked a lot better than any other "live with it" solutions we've tried before. We tried a lot of other tactics, and the one that puts the foods the furthest out of easy reach work the best. It's not like it's new information to me, I've known this about "temptation" studies for at least two decades, but even so in the back of my head I still think I "should be able to resist." Somehow I should be different than everyone else, all the other people in all the studies I've read?

Nope, I'm as normal as the next person. It's easier to keep from falling when I clear my path of obstacles rather than throwing marbles in front of myself so I can learn how not to fall.