Chicks in Control - desperate

I am new to this site. I've been trolling it for a few days. I have been so impressed by everyone's strength here. I just wish I could do the same. I cannot stop bingeing. I binge in the middle of the night, right when I wake up from a sound sleep. It just feels completely out of my control. When I have PMS it's very bad (which is now). My sister is getting married on August 14, and I'm in the wedding. I had really wanted to lose the rest of my pregnancy weight by then (just 10 or 12 lbs.) but now, most of all, I just want to stop this horrid bingeing. I am so exhausted, depleted, depressed, and hopeless. I have been getting heart palps really bad each day too. I have a 23-month-old daughter and it's SO hard to get up each day (at the crack of dawn, I might add) and provide her with a fun, normal day after I've been up at night stuffing myself. It seems like nothing I do helps--I've hidden food, locked food up, tried other strategies. I'm currently in CBT therapy but it's really hard for me to get to the appts. lately (long story--going through a divorce & have little $$ and little childcare). I desperately want to go to OA meetings, but I don't have the $$ to hire a sitter. Right now I just need supportive words and advice and hope. Thank you for reading my depressing situation. I'm so sick of feeling depressed and desperate and physically sick and uncomfortable. I just want to feel normal and give my daughter (and myself) a good life.

Welcome! I hope you find what you're looking for here. Check out the forums. I think you'll find that you are definitely not alone in your feelings and struggles. It's hard now, but it doesn't always have to be. Good luck to you, and stay strong (you ARE strong, ya know :o))!!!

You CAN do it. I always thought that I couldn't, either, but if I just take it day by day (and sometimes, minute by minute), it is possible.

When you get the urge to binge at night, resist it for 10 minutes, then another 10 minutes, and keep going. I've read that if you can resist it for 10 minutes, the urge will go away--but in my experiance, that isn't true...so you just have to be strong for one night, and that one night will give you the confidence to go one more night.

What foods to do you typically binge one? I would get them out of the house--because if they are there, you will eat them. There's no reason to have to actively resist that kind of temptation. It doesn't get rid of the urge, and it's not a guarentee, but it's much easier to resist if your go-to binge foods aren't in the house.