Weight Loss Support - The feeling of embarrassment keeping me from exercising?
05-21-2010, 11:55 PM
I feel like someone is watching me when I exercise and I just think of people making rude jokes and it stops me from exercising! It doesn't matter if my parents/siblings are home or not when I run on the tredmill but I just feel so embarrassed! Why is this and how can I get over it?
05-22-2010, 12:07 AM
This was my biggest problem when it came to excercise. Bigger than just not wanting to get off my butt and get in gear.
When I was younger, in an effort to help me loose weight, my mother used to force me to run on the treadmill every morning before school. While now I realize that she was trying to help, I also realize that for me, excercising became the same thing as emotional eating for other people. Being at home and excercising with family around was an emotional trigger.
I would excercise in secret and I didn't want anyone seeing me do it. I was really self conscious and I actually still have a hard time with doing it when people are home or when I'm at "the house".
The way I turned it around was by getting out of the house. I go to a gym to work out and while I was initially terrified, once I got there I realized that everyone was there to do their own thing. Most of the people hardly pay attention to anyone but their workout buddy or what they're focused on. While I may occasionally get a glance, it is always a good one. ;]
I also go running occasionally around the neighborhood, and that REALLY helped me stop being so self conscious at the gym.
So, try finding your trigger for embarassment. See what it is (like mine was at home in front of family) and try and break out of that (I go to the gym or away from the house).
You CAN do this. It will be hard at first and you may have to talk yourself through it or tell yourself to grit your teeth and bear it. Once you do it, it starts to get easier. Try using logic with yourself. If no one's home, who is there to be embarassed from? If it's yourself, pep yourself up. Give yourself encouragement.
Trying to figure out why is the first step!
05-22-2010, 12:13 AM
This was a huge problem for me when I started!!! I didn't even want my husband to glance at me when I was on the treadmill. What I did is I would get on the treadmill when everyone else was doing something else, usually late at night when my kiddos where asleep and my husband played his xbox or a computer game. Or I'd do it early in the morning, before anyone woke up, until I was confindent enough with myself, yet I still tend to work out at these times because it turned out to be very convvienent for me. I think we worry about ppl saying things or looking at us because of how we feel inside, self concious!! Try talking with your family and see if that can go to another room while you are on the treadmill, or just tell them about your feelings, chances are they are probably very PROUD of you for taking steps to lose weight. Good luck sweety! Best wishes!
05-22-2010, 09:17 AM
I work out at home. If I do the treadmill at the apartment complex, I leave if someone comes in (rarely, though, because of the time at which I generally exercise). The short time I went to a gym, I was able to put on my iPod, engross myself in an audiobook, and push aside my anxiety. But there was no way you were getting me to do free weights at a gym. I might never be able to, but I always have this image of "when I get to x weight, I'll be fine" when it's probably not going to be that simple.
05-22-2010, 04:52 PM
ugh yes, this is so embarrassing. when i first started walking, these kids up the street would make loud noises to go with every step i took, as if i was shaking the earth with my fat ***. you just have to power through. i know it totally sucks and i cried the first few times, but now i see them walking and they don't do anything, so i won. lol.
05-22-2010, 05:24 PM
I have this feeling all the time. I have never gone to a gym for that sole reason. Most of my exercise is walking, which I can do on a treadmill or around my neighborhood and I do strength training with the weights at my house or being creative (weight lifting full laundry baskets, lol). Do what makes you feel best. The gym isn't for everyone.
05-22-2010, 05:30 PM
Here's the thing: almost no one notices, and those who notice, don't really care. Or they think positive things, like, good for her. But if you are getting embarrassed when you KNOW you are alone, then that's a different story. This probably indicates a bigger issue with either yourself or your plan. Do you feel silly about the other weight loss moves you've made? Do you perhaps feel like you're doomed to fail, like there's no point in trying?
I wonder if you need to accept yourself as you are NOW. Accept that you are overweight, accept that you are out of shape, accept all of you that you don't like. Accept that you feel like an idiot on the treadmill and then say, "So the freak what? I'm doing this dang it!"
05-22-2010, 05:35 PM
I've had the same problem for years. When I go on the treadmill at home, my mom mocks me and goes "you need to run faster."
When I go for walks, it's always at night because I don't want people to see me. I'm risking my safety to save myself from embarrassment :/ I've already encountered a bear and a vicious dog.
And the only gym I can go to is the one on an Air Force Base because it's free.... and, needless to say, the people there are usually really fit men. It's intimidating and embarrassing as ****.
However, recently, I had a pep talk with myself. I said "April, yeah, you're big now. And yeah, it's embarrassing to have people watching you exercise. But it'll be far more embarrassing to deal with this your entire life than to deal with a few months of people watching you."
So... just try to tell yourself that the end result is worth the pain.
Remember: "tough times don't last, tough people do" :)