100 lb. Club - 65 LBS....IN Three MONTHS ?

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05-20-2010, 06:51 AM
:rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes: My daughter has gone from 260 to 195 simply, she says, by "NOT EATING"...what a concept ?!?! While I have been taken since late September to lose 35 lbs...and now, even gained back 5 of them.
I am amazed at how great she looks and feels, but I must admit, I am a little envious. Guess there IS something to calorie restriction after all.

05-20-2010, 06:54 AM
What exactly do you mean by "NOT EATING"? i'm lost

05-20-2010, 07:03 AM
I mean, she just snacks a little from time to time. She's 31 and doesn't live with me, so I don't know exactly what she is eating (and, yes, I have advised her to make sure that she is getting proper nutrition). I have been getting pictures by email, and she looks really great.... and healthy.

05-20-2010, 07:59 AM
You may not be getting the whole story--and even the part of it you are getting may not be accurate. I don't know what kind of relationship you have with your daughter, but if my mom asked me about my diet and exercise habits, I would be really guarded with her. Although we get along for the most part, there's just so much history there about diet, exercise, and body image that I would share information very cautiously. (I'm older than your daughter, if that matters.)

05-20-2010, 08:28 AM
Well, I do know my daughter very well, and athough I am sure there are areas of her life where she is not likely to be up-front...this is not one of them. From what I can tell she is actualy re-inventing herself after a long time (and not so great) relationship tanked....and making some positive changes.... besides the weight loss.

05-20-2010, 08:56 AM
Looking healthy and being healthy are not the same thing. Snacking from time to time is not nutrition it is starvation. 65lb in 12 weeks is ridiculous it's nearly 5.5lb a week average that's a daily deficit of over 2500 calories!

05-20-2010, 09:02 AM
i agree proper nutrition is key as well as exercise to keep the weight off. crash dieting is not only unhealthy but irregular eating/improper nutrition can lead to overeating and it can really make it difficult to maintain such a weight loss

05-20-2010, 09:24 AM
Could you have mis-heard her starting weight? I can believe 216-190 in 3 months, but I know people who have had WLS that didn't lose 65 lbs in 3 months (one lost close to that, but the other 2 slower).

05-20-2010, 10:05 AM
Don't know if its my place to peep up, but how old is your daughter?

Weightloss comes more easily to those who are younger (as a woman nearing the 30 mark I have to tell you, the last time I lost weight I was 18 and it nearly fell off on its own!).

If it helps, I'm a lil envious too. ;)

05-20-2010, 10:18 AM
31 says in the 3rd post why be envious of a 2500 deficit per day! It's unhealthy and probably destroying her
from the inside out

05-20-2010, 10:32 AM
Yeah that's not sounding very healthy at all! That's like Biggest Loser numbers, and the ones pulling those numbers start out much heavier than your daughter (and even then I dont' really see their losses as healthy).

Good for you for losing 35 pounds!!

05-20-2010, 10:39 AM
That's kinda scary actually. And, truly, do you think she can keep that up on a permanent basis? What happens when she starts to eat again? Or when her body's store of vitamins runs out? Will she be happy skinny... but with clumps of hair falling out, brittle skin, etc?

Losing weight slowly, carefully, and normally is the way to go for me!

05-20-2010, 10:45 AM
Losing weight slowly, carefully, and normally is the way to go for me! as it is for any normal sensible person!

05-20-2010, 11:34 AM
I know it sounds crazy....but she is very active ...working many hours on her feet in a city hospital. Alot of the doctors there were wondering if there could be something wrong because of the rapid weight loss...nope...the physical checks out OK. I have told her that she needs to make sure that she eats nutrient dense food. She isn't on diet pills either....just alot of coffee. She has never been on any diets before. The thing is she isn't counting calories, or carbs, or anything...she is just waiting till she is really hungry and then eating just enough to be comfortable. Personally, I am going to try that too.

05-20-2010, 11:51 AM
It truly sounds like she meant "not eating" quite literally. It is not outside the realm of possibility for an adult to develop an eating disorder. No matter how close a person is to their mother or their doctor for that matter if they have disordered thinking and eating, they aren't going to be truthful.

It's easy to envy people who seem to be losing weight quickly or easily. I can see where it would be tempting to think rapid, major weight loss is "success" and to be emulated. We do have a prevailing wisdom here though that fad diets, starvation or disordered eating isn't healthy.

Marigrace, of course you are an adult and we can't make you do anything but please be sensible! You have been successful in your weight loss, albeit slower than your daughter. You know studies have shown that slow, sane weight loss is the key to success in the long term.

I started dieting in 1986, weighing 165. I starved myself to get to 135 and there started my life of yo-yo dieting (lost 30, gained back 50!) I believe I permanently wrecked my metabolism and dieted myself to an all time high of 275 in Dec of 2009.

Slow and steady is going to help me repair my metabolism, learn to eat like a normal person, lose the weight once and for all. I can only wish for the same for you.

05-20-2010, 12:01 PM
It may not be healthy, but again, she might not be doing it intentionally either. When I started college I lived on the 3rd story and of course it was a large campus so I was walking a TON every single day. I also had to eat the cafeteria food as I was on a meal plan, and the cafeteria had to follow strict dietary guidelines (it was a state college) and portion sizes.
I was so busy all the time that I barely had time to eat and I was on the move none stop. I didn't do it intentionally but from the super increased activity (running half a mile to make a class to the 15 trips up and down the 3 flights of stairs) and from the lack of time to be stuffing my face (I ate three meals a day and generally a snack or two but they were small things in small amounts, a muffin at breakfast, a pre-wrapped sandwhich at lunch, a apple or cookie for a snack, etc) that I ended up dropping at an absurd rate. In 2 weeks I had lost 12lbs. Again, not intentional and probably not super healthy, but I wasn't depriving my body of food. Just really, really, reallly busy.

My advice, keep an eye on her. Praise her for her accomplishments and continue being a role model for healthy weight loss. If she continues the rapid drop in a month or two, intervene.

Lori Bell
05-20-2010, 12:03 PM
Oh heck, I lost 58 pounds in my first 3 months and I'm 12 years older and was not very active in the beginning. I was eating 1200 to 1500 calories a day, under doctor supervision. Heck, some Biggest Loser contestants lose that much in 3 weeks! I say good for her. I hope she continues to make herself healthy.

05-20-2010, 12:04 PM
No, I am sure it is not literal. She has gone from eating three meals a day in restaurants...to a minimal way of eating....It would be a bad idea to suggest that anyone literally stop eating....that is anorexia. I think it is more about determination than starvation, and I can see how I could learn from that example.

05-20-2010, 12:11 PM
Thank you Lori and Tara ! Yes I will keep tabs on her...but I don't want to get into the mother-daughter weight loss complexities...She wants to get down to 150 she is 5'4"....I say be careful, but go for it .

05-20-2010, 12:12 PM
no it doesn't sound crazy it sounds ridiculous. 1lb of fat = 3500 calories if she has lost 65lb of fat that is 227500 calories in 12 weeks. 18958 calories per week or 2708 per day. some people on here are on diet of max 1200 calories per day and your daughter is having a daily deficit of over 2x that without pills or couting carbs/calories.

however she hasn't lost 65lb of fat it will be fat and muscle at best 50/50. she is losing weight at the rate of around 260lb a year. that is highe than the rate of post op patients who eat such a small amount of food they have to have endless suppliments and pills.

i joined this board 7 years ago. back then it was a place of people who knew about healthy eating and exercise but just couldn't get it going and needed to vent to get through a bad patch.

Recently these boards have been overtaken by a tidal wave of crap. the being skinny at all costs attitude is firmly entrenched in the whole site. last week i reported an issue to a mod about a new poster who wanted to lose 20lb all everybody said was well done on coming i here i hope you make it you should be so proud of yourself etc. great? no, not a single person noticed that her BMI was healthy and her goal weight would have tipped her BMI on the verge of underweight. then there was the locked post on this board about the skinny girl "diet" or as it looked to me the concentration camp diet. people talking about a 1200 calorie a day diet that is the bare minimum needed to get all the basic nutriets without supplimentation, if your exercising you put extra strain on your body so it needs more or it will eat itself.

this is a support board for people who wish to lose weight and get healthy. i will refuse to support any ideas such as this nonsense about starving youself because someone else has done it and looks "healthy". if you want to starve yourself cos your so desperate to lose weight and look good then good luck to you but accept that you will damage your body and could lead to serious complications and future problems.

Rant over i shall now leave this board on a permanent basis.

Gourmet Bean
05-20-2010, 12:13 PM
It just sounds a little scary. Everyone here just wants to make sure your daughter is healthy and not unintentionally hurting herself.

05-20-2010, 12:16 PM
I have to agree with the others that it doesn't sound very healthy! I hope she is eating enough and not really starving herself! I have found for myself that this kind of "diet" always comes back to bite you on the ***.


Gourmet Bean
05-20-2010, 12:20 PM
Becky, that's so true... Studies show people who "diet" like this will eventually gain it all back plus some because they didn't really learn how to eat properly they just... severely restrict. So once the body actually has food it will hold onto every little bit possible thinking the person will again go on a rampage of hardly eating. It's a scary thought.

05-20-2010, 01:09 PM
Wow, such harsh words, Slimmings....sorry this doesn't meet with your ideals.

05-20-2010, 01:24 PM
Personally, I disagree with Slimmingsi and wonder where this perception comes from -- I don't see a "being skinny at all costs" mentality on these boards at all, and in fact many people provide information to remove that kind of mentality (without the hostility and name calling that slimming had in this thread).

We don't know that much about marigrace's daughter's diet, but consider this for a moment. Marigrace mentioned that she snacks a little from time to time and isn't eating. If the daughter were having 7-8 snacks a day at 150-200 cals per "snack" (which is EASY)...she's still consuming 1000-1600 calories per day without eating the traditional breakfast/lunch/dinner diet. If those "snacks" were healthy and nutritious,and she is getting in a lot of physical activity, it IS possible that she's losing a large amount of weight in a short amount of time and still doing it in a healthy manner. And a good part of her starting weight loss could be due to water weight loss -- she's gone from eating out many meals (can we say high sodium??) to eating small amounts of food over the course of the day.

Without knowing exactly what she's eating in her snacks and what kind of calories in/out, I think it's unfair to claim that she MUST be doing something unhealthy. She could be doing the same thing we are, but spacing her food out in smaller portions. And she may not be comfortable discussing it, as I've seen people mention in the past.

05-20-2010, 01:31 PM
SlimmingSI, I was not encouraging going extreme for weightloss or to do it in an unhealthy manner. I do not promote starvation, extreme calorie deprevation or extreme workouts to obtain a "healthy weight." I have never seen ANYONE on this board ever do so. Most of the time when people have had a slow start or not much weight loss I hear the opposite..."are you sure you have ENOUGH calories?"

It is possible, despite what you think, that by decreasing calories to a still adequate and healthy range, changing where these calories were coming from (nutrient dense) and a highly increased activity level will cause people to drop a good amount of weight. Your only looking, I think at what she's eatting, what the calories are that she's putting in, but what about whats shes expending.

Its not just about what you put in your body. There's your base metabolic requirement for weight maintence. The goal with weight loss is to burn more calories than you take in. At 260 pounds to maintain that weight being a complete lump on a log (i.e. breathing and blinking) you'd still have to consume almost 1900 calories a day. So if you go for a 1400 calorie diet there's an automatic 500 calorie deficit. Add in the extra walking around she does all day, which for the inital weight of 260 burns 300 calories per hour (she probably works at LEAST 8 hours, medical tends to be 12 hour rotations, but we'll go 8, if she was on her feet even half that time its be 1200 calories burned) plus the daily activities she'd need to do (even driving burns calories, brushing teeth, showering, etc) so even if she was lazy and didn't do housework that'd be another 500 calories burned easily, and if she worked out on top of work... well, that'd be more calories burned, but for our sake we'll say she was lazy... lets see, so shes already -500, the walking and daily activity, that's a 2200 calories a day deficit while still eatting a 1400 calorie diet. Your numbers say she was at a 2700 calorie deficit, well if she worked out half an hour, cleaned her house, ****, even walked a bit more at work, took the stairs... there ya have it. And if she was more active the math shows she would have been taking in more than just 1400 calories.

Her mother's stated here she's had a physcial, talked to a dr. Heck, even Lori stated she was UNDER a DR'S supervision and she'd lost almost as much!!

I guess I wonder, what would you like her to do? Tell her job she can't be on her feet as much, she has to slow down? Or grab a Big Mac instead of a turkey on wheat?

05-20-2010, 01:50 PM
My daughter has no history of dieting at all. I guess that's because she grew up watching me struggle with the issue so much. Now she is taking the weight off, has more energy,confidence and stamina....She is literally blossoming...I don't see anything wrong with that. If anyone should be alarmed it is me...but as far as I can see she is doing just fine.

05-20-2010, 01:51 PM
:wave::wave::wave: to slimmngsi.

You know we really don't know the EXACT circumstances to how she lost the weight. We talk about, at least some of us do, that it takes a 3500 calorie deficit to lose 1 lb. Thing is, that is not EXACT. It is not precise. Sometimes it takes more, sometimes it takes less. And someone mentioned that at that rate she would lose 260 lbs a year, that's provided that it came off at that same rate.

As for gaining it back, well I lost 60 lbs (just checked my weight journal) in my first three months. I did it eating VERY nutritious foods. I eat frequently, was never hungry. My hair got thicker and glossier. Nails grew like crazy. Never did I have more energy and stamina. I felt MARVELOUS. I did it by being EXTREMELY consistent. I exercised, and actually GAINED muscle. That was almost 4 years ago - ummm, I haven't gained it back -as someone mentioned that it was a given that she would. The rate at which you lose is not a determining factor in whether or not you keep it off. You keep it off provided you DECIDE to keep it off. You keep it off if you eat healthy foods in healthy portions.

I do hope your daughter is eating highly nutritious foods, and finding ones that she enjoys thoroughly - that's been key *for me* to my long term *success*, as I haven't felt deprived throughout my journey.
I do hope she's exercising to minimize muscle loss. I do hope she learns some great habits throughout, because that is what will really help her down the road.

05-20-2010, 01:57 PM
I count calories & I lost 33 pounds in my first 3 months ~i fI was healthy enough(meaning didn't have severe breathing probs) to have exercised a bit more I see it to be very possible.~And I ate decently healthy & still do ~But I take a vitamin just incase I do not eat perfect(recommeneded by my doctor) I eat 1400 calories a day(also okay'd By my Dr.)...I started at 259.9 so about the same as her. So I honetly see it possible.. & possible to be healthy with it also.

05-20-2010, 02:10 PM
OK...I just got worried enough to call her. She just worked a double shift and was falling asleep....but she did have a peanut butter sandwich when she got home. The End (I think) !

05-20-2010, 02:19 PM
Congrats on your 35lbs. Liquid fasting and eating something when ready to pass out will make anyone with a pulse lose weight. Oldest diet in the book, desperate measures. Not exactly deemed as "calorie restriction." Hope it works out in the end and best of luck to the both of you. Cheers!

05-20-2010, 02:31 PM
I think marigrace got the discussion she needed (and some she didn't). Going to close this up!

05-20-2010, 03:19 PM
Thank-you! Thank-you!