General chatter - I gotta vent.




View Full Version : I gotta vent.


LovebirdsFlying
03-28-2010, 10:08 PM
It seems I can't go anywhere nowadays. I'm not even safe in my own home, thanks to the internet and TV.

I understand people cursing and swearing when they are mad. I'll say a few colorful words in that situation too. But dropping f-bombs and g--d--grenades all over the place, and you're not even angry, I don't get! Why? Certain words are designed to have punch, and if they are used excessively, it takes the punch out of them.

But "free speech" interferes with my right not to have my ears assaulted, it seems. I can't read a news story, watch a funny video on YouTube or Facebook, or watch a crime drama on TV without it. Do I have to become a technology-free hermit and drop out of society altogether to get away from it?


astrophe
03-28-2010, 10:30 PM
I know how you feel.

I'm not a hermit. But I did ban TV, most magazines, the newspaper etc. I get my stuff on the internet when I choose, and this help keep my kid's exposure to it down.

A.

LovebirdsFlying
03-29-2010, 12:26 AM
I just wanted to say, I'm not talking about any one person or event. I'm talking about in general. I've seen comments on websites like Facebook and YouTube, where people can't even say "I like that," without throwing in an f-bomb. After a while I start to wonder if they know any other words.

You know, I just remembered. When I was something like 12 or 13 I used to curse a lot. Because I was trying to show how big I was now, and I was going to talk like that without getting my mouth washed out with soap. But guess what? I wouldn't have said those words with my mother in the room, so how mature was I, really? "I'll do what I want--as long as Mommy doesn't catch me." I think most of the people who do that kind of thing online are just unsupervised youth, trying to show what big boys/girls they are.


ParadiseFalls
03-29-2010, 01:53 AM
I think it's my age group that's the cause of it (20-somethings and college students). I noticed my language starting to change after high school, and most of the people I knew in my first year of college used pretty bad language. Now mine is bad, too. I work at a newspaper, and I've never heard language like newspaper people's! Myself included. I understand not wanting your kids to start cursing when they're young, but I guess I don't really see why it's such a stigma among adults. They're only words! I'm sure it's just to do with my age, but I never had a problem with people cursing even when I didn't.

VermontMom
03-29-2010, 07:17 AM
If I hear someone cursing alot, I guess I just feel sorry for them, to me it's a reflection of poor education, and just poor language skills and lack of social skills.

LovebirdsFlying
03-29-2010, 09:20 AM
I don't go for "it's just words." Words can be powerful weapons, and they do make a difference.

ParadiseFalls
03-29-2010, 09:37 AM
I don't know. Like I said, I see where you're coming from with the kids, and I don't curse in public because I know when it isn't appropriate. But if you were to overhear me talking to a friend and I said "sh*t" instead of "crap," and you thought I was unintelligent because of it, you'd be wrong. I shouldn't have to censor myself or carry a sign with my SAT verbal score for you to not think I'm an idiot. If I have good diction and the things I say are intelligent, why should a few words change your image of me? It's the same as thinking someone's a delinquent because he has tattoos or lazy because he's fat.

LovebirdsFlying
03-29-2010, 09:57 AM
Paradise, if I heard you in one isolated incident say "sh!t" instead of "crap," I wouldn't think a thing of it. I only call intelligence into question if someone, for example, throws seven f-bombs into a single sentence (I've heard it done) and they aren't even angry; it's just the way they talk. After about the second time, it starts to be annoying rather than effective communication.

To clarify: It's not that ANY and ALL profanity offends me. I'm not calling for a cessation of cursing. I do it myself. It's when the words are overused, and when there is no real reason for it, that I have a problem. You, Paradise, have indicated that you know when certain language isn't appropriate. Therefore my beef is not with you. It's with people who either don't know, or don't care, about being appropriate.

nelie
03-29-2010, 12:28 PM
I used to cuss a lot in college, like a lot a lot :) I'm not sure why but mostly because I was surrounded by it. I didn't think it was a big deal but I don't any more and it wasn't really a conscious change, it just happened naturally.

What I don't like is people cussing and yelling or maybe just yelling but that bothers me but as part of normal speech, it doesn't bother me.

EZMONEY
03-29-2010, 07:20 PM
someone even said the F-word was a powerful word....

wow!

powerful?

LovebirdsFlying
03-29-2010, 07:48 PM
someone even said the F-word was a powerful word....

wow!

powerful?

It is to me. I've been known to duck and cover.

ParadiseFalls
03-29-2010, 07:56 PM
EZMONEY, Maybe forceful sounds better to you? Whether or not it offends you, it's a word with power. I'm just saying we shouldn't fault someone for using a particular word to suggest that passing the health care bill was a HUGE deal, which it was.

I'm not trying to be contentious. And I agree that it's distasteful to constantly curse and/or do it to impress people. But if something slips out, I don't think people should make a big deal of it. :shrug:

lizziep
03-29-2010, 08:00 PM
words are words are words. the only time i have a problem is with racial or sexual/sexuality based slurs. or if it's directly thrown at me. it's one thing to say the f-word it's another thing to call me an f-ing something...

then again- i'm checking in as someone who is both intelligent and has a tendancy to talk like a dirty old sailor so... what do i know? :)

LovebirdsFlying
03-29-2010, 08:10 PM
EZMONEY, Maybe forceful sounds better to you? Whether or not it offends you, it's a word with power. I'm just saying we shouldn't fault someone for using a particular word to suggest that passing the health care bill was a HUGE deal, which it was.

I'm not trying to be contentious. And I agree that it's distasteful to constantly curse and/or do it to impress people. But if something slips out, I don't think people should make a big deal of it. :shrug:

And on that we agree. I'd have a problem if he kept on using that word, in ordinary circumstances, without being emotionally overwhelmed or anything. But I do think too much has been made of one little slip.

I've been in that situation myself. I'm overwhelmed, the word slips out, and someone says, "Will you tone down your language, please?" This peeves me off because I'm usually so careful about it. I think everyone is entitled to a "whoops" every now and then.

What does offend me is the neighbor who inserts the f-word at every available opportunity. "I lived there for f-ing three years." The word served no purpose.

And the word that bothers me even more than f- is the g-d one. Damn doesn't affect me in the slightest, but put God in front of it, and I cringe.

A bit of insight: Someone on another board was talking about how much she hates the smell of alcohol on someone's breath, because she had been an abused child, and that smell always meant Daddy was in a drunken rage, and she was about to be beaten. I think it's the same way with language. I was an abused child also. The other day I flinched momentarily when my husband was getting undressed for bed, and took his belt off. Just pure muscle reflex, you know. I heard the zzzip of the leather clearing the belt loops, and just for one split second, I....

Profanity is the same kind of signal. Maybe that's why it bothers me so much.

ParadiseFalls
03-29-2010, 08:10 PM
the only time i have a problem is with racial or sexual/sexuality based slurs.

I feel the same way.

VermontMom
03-29-2010, 08:13 PM
But if you were to overhear me talking to a friend and I said "sh*t" instead of "crap," and you thought I was unintelligent because of it, you'd be wrong. I shouldn't have to censor myself or carry a sign with my SAT verbal score for you to not think I'm an idiot. If I have good diction and the things I say are intelligent, why should a few words change your image of me? It's the same as thinking someone's a delinquent because he has tattoos or lazy because he's fat.

oh gosh, not what I meant at all! so I was at fault for not being more specific. I meant when one overhears someone who uses "f-ing" instead of "really" or "so" in multiple sentences, in ordinary, calm situations. As in - "this check out line is so f-ing long! What's the f-ing holdup? oh hey, look at that puppy picture, that is f-ing cute! Wasn't that pizza last night f-ing good?" F-yeah!"

LovebirdsFlying
03-29-2010, 08:20 PM
oh gosh, not what I meant at all! so I was at fault for not being more specific. I meant when one overhears someone who uses "f-ing" instead of "really" or "so" in multiple sentences, in ordinary, calm situations. As in - "this check out line is so f-ing long! What's the f-ing holdup? oh hey, look at that puppy picture, that is f-ing cute! Wasn't that pizza last night f-ing good?" F-yeah!"

And we're on the same page!

nelie
03-29-2010, 08:23 PM
I don't see how that makes someone uneducated. I think it is more their environment and the fact that they are around others who speak that way.

Aclai4067
03-29-2010, 08:41 PM
I curse a fair bit. I think I probably cursed more in high school than in college, but really it's always fluctuated based on my surroundings. I curse more around friends who curse, don't curse at all at work, and only curse when the situation warrents it around my parents. That said, I don't really mind cursing 99% of the time. If it were acceptable to curse at work, I'd probably do it. I'm of the "they're just words" philosophy. Yes, words can be very powerful IF you give them power. Frankly, you're going to have to do a lot better than drop F-bombs if you want to offend me. I do try to limit my use of G-D, because I know that one bugs a lot of people on a religious level (Southern Baptists are notoriously passionate and I'd rather avoid the lecture/debate that ensues). And as far as that 1% of the time when cursing does bother me: well, I have a friend who is one of those who severely overuses the F word, and it's really embarassing when she leaves extremely profain comments on my facebook that can be read by my rather conservative family members.

ParadiseFalls
03-29-2010, 09:55 PM
I meant when one overhears someone who uses "f-ing" instead of "really" or "so" in multiple sentences, in ordinary, calm situations. As in - "this check out line is so f-ing long! What's the f-ing holdup? oh hey, look at that puppy picture, that is f-ing cute! Wasn't that pizza last night f-ing good?" F-yeah!"

I agree with that.

EZMONEY
03-29-2010, 10:31 PM
I will walk away from my political vent and say....

I use the F word way too frequently...I am in construction...I am 56 years old...I remember using the word in front of my mom when I was 16...she was flabbergasted...my dad said "honey...don't worry about it...all the men around him say it, it isn't a big deal anymore"...that was 40 F'n years ago...

To tell you the truth I am embarrassed that I have used the F-word so much in my life w/o even thinking about it!