100 lb. Club - Do You Think It's Possible to Lose 100 LBS by DEC. 31, 2010?




VickieLou
02-26-2010, 02:46 AM
Do You think it's possible to lose 100 LBS by Dec. 31, 2010? I did okay in Janurary but February gained back some weight. My Goal weight is 130 and Current weight is 236.8. Has anyone lost a 100 LBS in 10 months?


Arctic Mama
02-26-2010, 04:07 AM
Honestly, I think it's a bit of an overshot and quite optimistic. That is expecting yourself to maintain almost 2.5 pound losses every week, even once you get into the 160's and below. To create that much of a calorie deficit is extremely difficult at that weight, and having witnessed your recent struggles and recommitment, I think it would be more kind to yourself (and achievable) to aim for 50-70 pounds of loss this year, to make allowances for the slowed rate of loss in the lower weight groups.

This opinion is given with lots of love and support for you - I'd rather see you meet a goal with a smile than feel a failure for not making an unbelievably high bar. Whatever you choose, I wish you the best!

rockinrobin
02-26-2010, 07:35 AM
Anything's possible, I suppose. And yes, I've done it. 100 lbs and than some.

But I stayed on plan day after day after day, week after week, month after month - through holidays, stress, social events, birthdays, etc... I think I had about 5 off-ish days throughout and even those were not that bad - looking back they were nothing with nothing. And I'm not the only one around here who had done that. There are quite a few of us with similar experiences.

Are you prepared to do that? The truth is, even if you DO do that, you can't be CERTAIN of the results.

The only thing you can be CERTAIN of, are the things that you control. And make no mistake about it, you control what goes in your mouth - and what doesn't. The choice IS yours. You don't have to be fat if you don't want to be. It bears repeating - you don't have to be fat if you don't want to be. That is the bottom line. It's within your power, your control. You DO hold the key. Weight loss is available for anyone and everyone - yourself included.

Seems like you've been struggling as of late. What is it about your plan that you find most difficult? Maybe THAT is what you should work on and then the weight WILL come off.

Sweeten up that plan of yours, customize it, make it more appealing to you, find foods that you love, get rid of the junk, make some food laws and rules that you can abide to. And then get EXCITED about the changes you are about to make. Don't dread them. Find the joy in this!!! In other words - set yourself up for success. Stop thinking poor me, I can't eat this and I can't eat that. Remember - staying FAT is the poor me. Staying FAT is the deprivation here. You're depriving yourself of the best you possible. No deprivation involved passing up on some calorie laden foods. None what soever. Adhering to a healthy lifestyle is a joy and a blessing, it's no burden. REALIZE that. Because it's a biggie. Tell yourself that even if you don't believe it right now - eventually you will KNOW it.

And then of course the thing is, the big thing is - that you must be WILLING to implement these changes. Consistently. Because that's what it's all about. IF you want consistent, steady weight loss - you must be CONSISTENT with your plan - no matter what. Because you're now a health minded person. Who wants to get to a healthy weight waaaay more than she want "those foods". Because really, that's the only way that this can happen. Your desire to be thin, fit, slim and healthy MUST outweigh, overpower and overtake your desire for "those foods".

I would urge you to FOCUS on these HEALTHY behaviors. Really, really, REALLY FOCUS on the good eating (exercise) behaviors and the weight WILL come off. As long as you continue on and stop stopping the process, each and every excess pound WILL come off. The better you do that, the sooner it will come off.

Decide what it is you want the MOST out of life, resolve to pay "the price" to get it and than get out there and get it!!! :)


grrrkgrrrl
02-26-2010, 07:44 AM
i completely agree with the above posters.

from personal experience i can tell you i lost 40 pounds in 4 months (and i was starting at the 180's) but i was 100% focused and commited. no set-backs, no slip-ups. black and white.

so i guess, the answer is the same as always: it depends on you.

Shmead
02-26-2010, 07:48 AM
One thing to remember is that weight loss is full of incremental victories. Let's say, instead, that you lose 75 lbs in ten months--quite possible, as long as you are consistent. You'll weigh 155. You'll be wearing 8/10s. You'll look perfectly "normal" at that weight--someone no one would describe as even chubby or heavyset. You'll want to lose a little more, still, but you'll already love what's happened to you. You'll feel great. So don't get discouraged if it seems like it will take forever.

Barbara79
02-26-2010, 08:03 AM
Hi VickiLou,

I think maybe 100lbs in 10 months is pushing it a bit. You can guarantee it will be extremely difficult!

I was losing about 7lbs per month on average through SureSlim but, my friend lost on average 8 1/2 lbs per month on it. So that's nearly 90lbs in 10 months.

Based on those results, maybe you won't make 100lbs but, you'll be close.

What diets/clinics have you tried? Do you have any friends trying SureSlim at the moment?

Barb x

matt_H
02-26-2010, 08:11 AM
Its important to have multiple goals: a minimum, a "i'd be happy with that" and a "longshot".

You set your goals too high and then you feel like a failure for not meeting them. When in reality, any weight loss is a success.

rockinrobin
02-26-2010, 08:47 AM
Its important to have multiple goals: a minimum, a "i'd be happy with that" and a "longshot".

You set your goals too high and then you feel like a failure for not meeting them. When in reality, any weight loss is a success.

Yes.

BUT.

I say aim low, you get low. Aim High you get HIGH.

But I think 100 lbs is too far off of a goal. It's too far in the future. And then you keep pushing it off and pushing it off. I'll get to it tomorrow. And then I'll get to it tomorrow. And then I'll get to it tomorrow. And before you know it, you've tomorrow'ed away, I don't know a month, 6 months, 2 years...

Therefore I would set smaller more IMMEDIATE goals. Like I said previously, I think the most important thing to focus on is those behaviors, but when you set smaller goals, it puts a fire under you. It gets you moving. HELPS TO KEEP YOU FOCUSED ON THE HERE AND NOW. The TODAY.

Focus (again those behaviors first) on losing one pound. One pound. ASAP. As in "I want to lose one pound - NOW". What do I have to do TODAY to MAKE it happen? Lose that one pound - asap - and then repeat the process. And keep on repeating and repeating...

Trudiha
02-26-2010, 09:23 AM
I've just done it, so it is possible, as Robin says you will have to be quite focused on what you are doing. Additionally, you will need to be very thick skinned; folks will give you a lot of grief about 'obsession' and 'eating disorders'.

Best of luck and keep your eye on the goal.

Lori Bell
02-26-2010, 09:43 AM
Are you talking 100 pounds MORE, or 100 pounds total from your starting weight? If it's the latter, NO problem. If it's 100 MORE, than you will have to push harder and work harder than you did last month, that's for sure! ;) The only way you'll know is if you try it and find out....but you won't if you just sit around dreaming about it.

In my first 10 months I lost 140 pounds, but my starting weight was almost 100 pounds MORE than your current weight, and I didn't "cheat" EVER from March 4th until Christmas Day...

thistoo
02-26-2010, 10:00 AM
The thing is, you can't expect your weight loss to be consistent over time. I grant that I am an extreme example and I am investigating the situation with my doctor, but I hit 90 pounds lost and just stopped. Didn't change anything about my diet, increased my activity quite a bit, as a matter of fact, and still my weight has not budged from the 150s in five months. At five feet tall that is unreasonable, yet there it is.

So you can aim to stay on plan and exercise consistently for the next ten months. You can certainly lose plenty of weight in that time and feel 100% better about yourself than you probably do right now. Will you lose X amount of pounds by then? Maybe, maybe not.

Gracie789
02-26-2010, 10:04 AM
I'm like Lori Bell, I lost 100+ lbs in a little less than a year and I can count on one hand the times I slipped/cheated. Of course my starting weight was also that much higher. I think it is possible for you to lose 100lbs by the end of the year but it will be difficult and like everyone else mentioned you will have to make a plan and stick to it with zero slips. Stay strong and you'll eventually reach your goal! :)

Eliana
02-26-2010, 10:12 AM
I say go for it. Why not? But if after 10 months you've "only" lost 90 lbs, can you handle that mentally? If so, then why not. ANYTHING to motivate you right now, Vickielou.

I'd love to see you shooting for the stars! You're so worth it!

cmyhc01
02-26-2010, 10:12 AM
It also depends on the plan--I'm currently on a medically-supervised protein sparing modified fast and have basically lost the equivalent of a pound a day since I started (36 pounds since 1/18/10). I will be doing this until I reach my goal weight, reach a pleateau or get to a point where I just can't do it anymore. If the former wins out of these three options, I could potentially lose 144 pounds in about 5 months.

That being said, I realize how impossible that sounds and I'm definitely not going to beat myself up if that happens. I'd be happy if I got 75% of the way there in that amount of time (or even a little less) and then switch to a low-carb/high fiber program (i.e. WW). It's so much easier to set smaller goals for myself. Right now I'm a quarter of the way to my weight loss goal and my next goal is to get a third of the way there (48 pounds). But I'll even be excited when I reach 44 because that'll mean I *only* have 100 to go. It's amazing, because when I first started it seemed like an insurmountable goal but now I know that I will be able to achieve it.

Is there a specific event for which you want to lose 100 pounds by the end of the year, VickieLou? Or are you just setting an ultimate goal for yourself? You have to do what's best for you--both physically and emotionally. I just hope you choose to lose the weight in a healthy fashion and draw support from your friends, family and everyone here (not to sound preachy!!). Best of luck to you with whatever you decide--keep us posted!!

time2lose
02-26-2010, 10:15 AM
First, listen to Robin. She knows what she is talking about.

Orginially posted by Lori Bell
Are you talking 100 pounds MORE, or 100 pounds total from your starting weight? If it's the latter, NO problem. If it's 100 MORE, than you will have to push harder and work harder than you did last month, that's for sure! The only way you'll know is if you try it and find out....but you won't if you just sit around dreaming about it.

This is one of those things that I agree but disagree. Many people can lose 80 to 100 pounds in 10 months. But then there are the people like me, older and hypothyroid (or other issues) that lose much slower even when totally on plan. I don't know enough about you to even guess if you can lose that amount of weight that fast. Also, if you set a goal of 100 pounds in 10 months and lose 70, are you going to feel like a failure and be discouraged?

Everyone is right that you will have to consistently stay on plan! I think that you should develop a plan that you can live with and focus on that instead of x pounds in y amount of time.

Just my 2 cents worth.

LisaF
02-26-2010, 10:33 AM
Personally, I would not set myself a goal of a hundred pounds in ten months. My body's been perfectly happy crawling along at the pace of approximately a pound a week. More importantly, I've had a somewhat difficult time with my mental/emotional adjustment, and I don't think I would have managed nearly as well if I'd had to adjust twice as fast. But as you've heard, everyone's experiences are different.

I think it's important to have goals, and important to visualize yourself meeting those goals. But even if you only lose 50 pounds in a year, that's 50 pounds that you no longer have on your body, and it's a huge achievement. And it's not like you only have the one year, right?

More important than having the goal is recognizing that not meeting the goal is not failing. It's not a reason to give up, or think less of your accomplishments. So if you think 100 pounds by New Years is a reasonable goal for you, go ahead and set it. But if you start to realize that it was an unreasonable goal, don't be afraid to change your time frame.

Lisa

Nada
02-26-2010, 10:36 AM
I'm certainly no expert (my weight loss has been very slow---intentionally) but my question is: why 100 lbs and why 12/31?

I'm not very comfortable with date-based weight loss targets. I see weight loss as a by-product anyway. The behaviors are what I focus on ----eating sensible portions of healthy foods and getting in shape. I am constantly tweaking those things, of course, based on the eventual downward trend of the scale---but it is not my primary focus--healthy behaviors are.

Lori Bell
02-26-2010, 12:07 PM
You know, nothing ventured nothing gained. I truly think if Vicki loses any weight by 12/31 she'll be thrilled. If she aims for 100 and only loses 30 she will still feel better, look better and be healthier. I'm usually not a huge mega goal making person...my only goal when I first started out was to not gain back anything I lost. I farther I got, the better I felt, the more I tried, the more fun it became.

Slow is great, but some people just have had enough, they are tired of being fat and want it off like yesterday. I see nothing wrong with setting the bar high. If Vic only loses 1/2 the weight she'll be thrilled...we all are. Seriously, anything is better than nothing, and sitting and dreaming got none of us anywhere. With 100 pounds to lose it's going to take a long time regardless, so all those "new & healthy behaviors" that people say you learn from losing slow are still going to come. If a person only has 20 pounds to lose and takes it off slowly like in 4 months have they "learned" the behaviours better than someone who loses 100 in 10 months?

cfmama
02-26-2010, 12:22 PM
I lost well over 100 pounds in 10 months... 155 in 12 months to be exact. However... I was starting FAR heavier and I'll be honest... I was ON FREAKING PLAN day after day after day after day. I made good food choices for every single thing I put in my mouth. I RARELY faltered and if I did? I got BACK on that horse IMMEDIATELY.

I can count maybe 3-4 times I was off plan in those 12 months... maybe.

Shoot for it. Work your HARDEST. Realize that you CAN DO ANYTHING you put your mind to. But YOU have to do it.... talk it cheap. Let's see some action.

PeanutsMom704
02-26-2010, 12:40 PM
You know, nothing ventured nothing gained. I truly think if Vicki loses any weight by 12/31 she'll be thrilled. If she aims for 100 and only loses 30 she will still feel better, look better and be healthier. I'm usually not a huge mega goal making person...my only goal when I first started out was to not gain back anything I lost. I farther I got, the better I felt, the more I tried, the more fun it became.

Slow is great, but some people just have had enough, they are tired of being fat and want it off like yesterday. I see nothing wrong with setting the bar high. If Vic only loses 1/2 the weight she'll be thrilled...we all are. Seriously, anything is better than nothing, and sitting and dreaming got none of us anywhere. With 100 pounds to lose it's going to take a long time regardless, so all those "new & healthy behaviors" that people say you learn from losing slow are still going to come. If a person only has 20 pounds to lose and takes it off slowly like in 4 months have they "learned" the behaviours better than someone who loses 100 in 10 months?


I think it depends on how VickieLou thinks she will react if she tries and doesn't make it.

I know for myself, in the past, if I wasn't perfect, then I was off plan and kept going, and would gain back everything I had lost. This time, I'm not going for perfection, I'm going for changing my life, and seeing my weight change as a result of that, instead of the other way around. But I could see where I'd set myself up for failure if I focused too much on X pounds by Y date. I started off that way, and have had to work hard at adjusting. I still will do challenges and make short term goals, but my whole outlook has changed, and I'm happy with any progress I make, even if I don't make a specific target. However, the old me wouldn't have worked that way.

I do still have the big goal and am aiming high, I just don't have a timeframe around it. Maybe when I'm 20 lbs away from goal or something, I'll try to push myself by putting some time parameters on it.

rockinrobin
02-26-2010, 12:40 PM
I'll be honest... I was ON FREAKING PLAN day after day after day after day. I made good food choices for every single thing I put in my mouth. I RARELY faltered and if I did? I got BACK on that horse IMMEDIATELY.

I can count maybe 3-4 times I was off plan in those 12 months... maybe.

Shoot for it. Work your HARDEST. Realize that you CAN DO ANYTHING you put your mind to. But YOU have to do it.... talk it cheap. Let's see some action.

Sweetie, why of course, why WOULDN'T you be honest??? Staying on plan day after day, yada, yada, yada is nothing to be ashamed of!

I sometimes feel (obviously it must be in my head, a little paranoid ya think?) that that is looked down upon, as if it's "freakish". When nothing could be further from the truth. Well that's for another thread I guess.

And I'm with Lori, I lost 154 lbs in 10 months. Fast? I guess, kinda , a little bit. But it was MORE than enough time to customize my plan, find foods (healthy ones) that I ADORE, adapt strategies and coping skills to get me through all times, fall in LOVE with this lifestyle and DECIDE to STAY this way and never, ever go back....

If you want the weight off fast-ish, look at this as your job, your mission. Make it your priority. Make it your hobby. Embrace the lifestyle. Find the joy in this. Challenge yourself. Raise your standards. Require more from yourself. Push yourself. Reach new heights. Grow. Conquer something new. Make your dreams a reality. TRANSFORM YOUR LIFE. Find out who you were intended to be. :)

diyana
02-26-2010, 01:05 PM
I love all the above posts!! I agree it's possible. Though I've been "working at this" since June '09 and have lost 23 lbs. Admittedly, I wasn't 100% dedicated 100% of the time. Now that I am becoming more dedicated and actually working my program...I'm finding that it actually works! I really have to be determined, dedicated and find alternatives to unhealthy foods so I don't experience deprivation.

My biggest challenges have been health related...illness and injury that have sidelined me from exercise and slowed my progress...even to the point of gaining and losing the same 5 lbs for months.

Set your sights and goals high, but make sure you are happy with each success, small and large. And above all don't berate yourself if you don't only get halfway or 3/4 of the way there by the end of the year.

Rockin' - I love your signature lines...definitely true.

rockinrobin
02-26-2010, 01:34 PM
Okay. The original question is "is it possible to lose 100 lbs in under a year?". And the question is CLEARLY yes as it's been done by several of us.

Okay. Then many of us chimed in with time based goals and all that stuff.

HAving a hard time getting my thoughts typed out here, putting them down on paper. It's kinda hard to explain what I'm getting at....

If the answer would have been unequivocally no, would that then be a reason to not try? Or to not attempt weight loss at all, like if it were to take TWO years, would that not be *good*? If I can't get it off in so and so time than it's not worth it? Again, I could be waaaay off base here, but is that what I'm hearing from the OP? I don't know...

Hmmm... Really what is the difference whether or not once can lose 100, or 90 or 80 or whatever pounds in a year. The thing is stop worrying, and pondering, and wishing and thinking and hoping and longing and JUST GET STARTED TODAY. TODAY. This day. Take ACTION. MAKE IT HAPPEN. DECIDE to do this. TODAY. This day. And every day.

Gosh, I know this may come off as harsh, but thems' the facts. You've just got to do it. And yes it can be done. It can. Whether it's 100, 150, 200 lbs or more. It's not rocket science. It's not some crazy hare-brained out of this world, unattainable "thing". It's weight loss. Some of us have more challenges then others, but there are ways around each and every obstacle.

You can't wish the weight away. Hope it away. Ponder it away. You've got to WORK it away. You've got to be willing to work past the initial discomfort and you've got to be willing to do what is NECESSARY and what is REQUIRED. And then it will happen. It will. Because it IS a doable thing.

I know we're gonna hear (or many will at least think it) from the well the "just do it thing never works" and all that and I'm sincerely sorry if I've offended even one person, even slightly, but G-d willing it'll help at least one person gain back there life and find their way out of the hole. And then they too can sit back and wonder (like I have done) why they didn't START earlier. Why they didn't START earlier and never the heck stop. Just CONTINUE. :hug:

ETA: diyana, I love my signature lines too!! Wish I would have written them. Though I didn't write them, them really rang out to me...

Michelle98272
02-26-2010, 01:42 PM
Its important to have multiple goals: a minimum, a "i'd be happy with that" and a "longshot".

You set your goals too high and then you feel like a failure for not meeting them. When in reality, any weight loss is a success.

Great Advice, Matt! I second that. Also, for me this journey is a marathon not a sprint. I've lost 70 lbs in 6 months in the past with the help of the old diet combo phen /fen. I didn't learn how to eat like a normal person, I didn't have to exercise, I just took some pills and forgot to eat! This time, I'm taking my time...finding new foods I love, learning to cook all over again, finding activities that get me out of the house to "exercise" that are fun, not a chore...I'm treating myself kindly...taking bubble baths, painting my nails, calling a friend instead of eating when I'm needing something other than food to fill me...I'm relearning to be a "normal" person all over again. This is a lifestyle for me not a diet, it is a long term solution not a quick fix.

It is great to have 100 lbs in 10 months as your end all be all goal....and like Matt said...Have a good enough..is good enough goal.

One thing that got me in trouble with my eating/diet/lifestyle in the past was all or nothing thinking. This isn't about black and white, right or wrong, good or bad....For me if I set myself up with a goal like 100 lbs in 10 months...I'd quit rather early on ...say the first or second month that I didn't lose the 10 lbs. And when I quit something...I quit for a good long time. It took me 9 months to come back here after the last time I fell off the wagon.

Be gentle with yourself and your goals.

CLCSC145
02-26-2010, 01:43 PM
It will be a year for me on April 18th of this year, so I'm at 131 in 10 months. But I also was WAY fatter than you when I started. The less I weigh, the harder losing it gets. And the slooooower it gets.

I really like the idea of saying to yourself, "I'm going to stay on plan for the next 10 months, minimal slip ups, and see how much I can lose." 10 months of great habits, on plan calories, and exercise? That will be so good for you and your health no matter what the scale says in the end. And honestly, would you be bummed to lose, say, 60 pounds by the end of the year?

Don't set yourself up for failure by setting a "X pounds by X date" goal. Set a goal to be a pitbull about your plan and then enjoy your results, whatever they may be!

rockinrobin
02-26-2010, 01:47 PM
Don't set yourself up for failure by setting a "X pounds by X date" goal.

I don't mean to be snide or snarky, but honestly, is THAT what sets us up for failure? I don't think it was with me anyway...

Michelle98272
02-26-2010, 02:05 PM
I don't mean to be snide or snarky, but honestly, is THAT what sets us up for failure? I don't think it was with me anyway...


Just commenting, also not snide or snarky but yes...it would set me up for failure. All or nothing thinking doesn't work for everyone. :hug: Some people have to be 100% strict all the time for something to work others need to have more wiggle room. That is what is so great about 3FC, we are all on different plans, giving eachother support and feedback and doing things in ways which work for us.

Eliana
02-26-2010, 02:06 PM
Sweetie, why of course, why WOULDN'T you be honest??? Staying on plan day after day, yada, yada, yada is nothing to be ashamed of!

I sometimes feel (obviously it must be in my head, a little paranoid ya think?) that that is looked down upon, as if it's "freakish". When nothing could be further from the truth. Well that's for another thread I guess.


I feel like that too, like it's somehow "freakish" that you, CFmama and others (like me) are on plan every, every day. And that's odd, because isn't that what we're striving for?

Call me crazy, but each and every day I do this, it gets that much easier. It's not hard to be on plan, at least not my plan.

So I still say do it! I don't like time lines either because if I was on plan every, every day and did NOT lose the hoped for 100 lbs in 10 months, should I be disappointed? Heck no! BUT if I was on plan every, every day for 10 months I'd lose something and what a lot of good that does the body! I've set a goal for myself to be on plan for one year. Every day I am on plan no matter what...for one year.

mandalinn82
02-26-2010, 02:09 PM
OK, you know your personality better than we do, right?

So, if 10 months from now, you've lost 80 lbs, are you going to say "I'm a FAILURE, I didn't make my goal!"? Or are you going to say, "80 lbs, GO ME!"?

For me (and me alone!), I fell into the easily discouraged/did not meet my goal so I suck camp. What this means is that I had to structure my goals in a different way. I had a giant calendar for each month, and each month, I established a goal for different things (# of days between X and Y calories, # of days I did a cardio workout, # of leg, ab, and arm workouts). I put stickers on the calendar each time I accomplished one of those goals, and gave myself rewards when I met my monthly targets.

I probably lost close to 100 lbs in a year (I didn't actually ever calculate it, but my loss was pretty quick). This was particularly helpful for me in that no day was a "total loss", and even if I overate a bit, I was still motivated to get right back on plan because I could earn stickers for other good behaviors like workouts. And because I have some hormonal issues (and later, injury issues) that prevented my loss from being as fast as it might have been, it helped me see all the GOOD I was doing.

So in answer to your general question, it's totally possible. How you should structure your goals is something you have to consider and decide for yourself, taking into account your personality type and preferences.

diyana
02-26-2010, 02:11 PM
My weight loss has been slow - lots of ups and downs...and if I'd had a 100 lbs in 10 months goal, I might've gotten frustrated. Long-term rigid time based goals do sometimes set me, personally, up for disappointment. But they work for others. I use the timeframes as a guideline. If it takes me a month or two longer to get to my goal, at least I'll get there. And the other things I tell myself are: If I go back to my former habits, I'll go back to my former weight, size and health issues. And...I know that no matter how long this journey takes me, I can't quit, I can't stop, I can't give up, or I'll just go back to the way I was.

zabou69
02-26-2010, 02:12 PM
If you are on plan and exercising and feel good and know that you are not slipping up it shouldnt matter how much you lose and in what time frame. I too have at least 80 to lose and am happy to just stay the same some days and not gain. Just feeling good about yourself and having the " I can do this" attitude will help in your weightloss journey also.:)

diyana
02-26-2010, 02:17 PM
mandalinn82 - I couldn't have said it better myself. I used to fall into the all or nothing...I didn't meet my goal so I suck mode. Thanks for expressing my thoughts (and obviously yours) so eloquently.

rockinrobin
02-26-2010, 02:25 PM
Michelle,

CC said this:

Don't set yourself up for failure by setting a "X pounds by X date" goal.

I responded by this:

I don't mean to be snide or snarky, but honestly, is THAT what sets us up for failure? I don't think it was with me anyway...

then you responded with this:

Just commenting, also not snide or snarky but yes...it would set me up for failure. All or nothing thinking doesn't work for everyone.

But HOW does that fall INTO the all or nothing category???????????

matt_H
02-26-2010, 02:26 PM
I don't mean to be snide or snarky, but honestly, is THAT what sets us up for failure? I don't think it was with me anyway...

I think for some people it does set them up for failure. Like everything, everyone is different. I think having realistic mini-goals along the way works better for some people.

As an example, I know I'm not going to be able to run a marathon this fall. If I tried to do that, I'd probably fail and might get injured along the way. I do know I can run a half marathon and that is a very realistic goal for me based on my past training. I have measurable steps (mini-goals) along the way so I can track my progress.

If I attempted to train for a marathon right now, I'd probably be very discouraged with my progress and get depressed. Maybe even give up running all together.

Lyn2007
02-26-2010, 02:45 PM
About the 'freakish' thing...

It is not at all freakish to be on plan day after day after day until you meet your goals. I think it is wonderful!

However it is also not freakish to struggle and be unable to hang on and do it day after day after day. Lord knows I have fought tooth and nail for two and a half years to get 50ish pounds off and keep it off. If I could 'just' stay on plan every day and get the weight off I'd be doing that right now!

So I think neither way of 'being' is freakish at all. We are all different, we all have different issues (physical, mental, emotional) that got us fat so we all are not going to lose the weight in the same manner.

What I think everyone can agree on is that the weight CAN BE LOST and it is not impossible to do.

rockinrobin
02-26-2010, 02:46 PM
For me, and without a doubt we are all different, like a LOT different. But *for me*, there was lots more going into my "failure" then not meeting time based goals. I guess what set me up for failure was not taking the NECESSARY steps to at least TRY and MEET those goals.

THAT was where my problem was. I wasn't willing to put in the continual effort needed to get the job done. I wasn't willing to eat give up certain foods. I wasn't willing to rid my home of the junk. I wasn't willing to ADD in others. I wasn't willing to resist temptation. I wasn't willing to NOT give into cravings. I wasn't willing to make consistent, mature, responsible choices. I wasn't willing to give "this" the respect it so rightly deserves. I wasn't willing to commit FULLY. I wasn't willing to exercise. I basically wasn't wiling to do the work necessary.

Ya know, even though we are all different, and we know what works for us and what doesn't (or at least we try and figure it out), it is hard to pinpoint certain things even for ourselves. It's a complicated group of issues. :dizzy:

CLCSC145
02-26-2010, 02:49 PM
I don't mean to be snide or snarky, but honestly, is THAT what sets us up for failure? I don't think it was with me anyway...

For me, yes, that is exactly the kind of goal that makes me feel like a failure if I don't meet it - even when I did my absolute best. It's why when I was expecting to lose about 10 pounds a month and I "only" lost 8.6 in January I was so upset and frantic that the scale wasn't moving. A non-perfectionist might look at that and say, right on! I lost 8.6 pounds! I can only see the 1.4 pounds I didn't lose and kick myself for failing to do what I wanted to do, even though I stuck to my plan like glue the whole month. It's not logical, but it's how my brain works. So when I see others leaning toward that trap, I try to steer them away.

rockinrobin
02-26-2010, 04:01 PM
For me, yes, that is exactly the kind of goal that makes me feel like a failure if I don't meet it - even when I did my absolute best. It's why when I was expecting to lose about 10 pounds a month and I "only" lost 8.6 in January I was so upset and frantic that the scale wasn't moving. A non-perfectionist might look at that and say, right on! I lost 8.6 pounds! I can only see the 1.4 pounds I didn't lose and kick myself for failing to do what I wanted to do, even though I stuck to my plan like glue the whole month. It's not logical, but it's how my brain works. So when I see others leaning toward that trap, I try to steer them away.

Again, not meaning to be disrespectful or anything, but since this just has not been my experience and I'm plain old curious, what about it sets you up for failure? How could you have failed? Those 8.6 lbs didn't fall off miraculously. You WORKED to get them off. You put effort into getting them off. Okay, granted I hear that you *failed* to get the 10 lbs off, you've *only* taken off 8.6 - so then what happens??? What happens AFTER you've missed the mark by 1.4 lbs?

Again, not to be, well, not to be anything, but I find this fascinating. I'm wondering if the fact that I put forth such little effort in previous weight attempts is shining through.

ubergirl
02-26-2010, 04:06 PM
I have a really big meeting coming up in a couple of weeks-- part of the whole big breakthrough that made me kick start this journey in the first place.

I turned my life around on a dime on 6/19/2009 and since then, like some others, I stay 100% on plan, day after day after day. I went from being totally sedentary to lifting weights and running. I've lost, so far 77 pounds.

But here's the thing. If, back in June, somebody had said to me "Uber, on the day you go for your big meeting, you'll weigh 218 lbs," I might have been really discouraged and decided the whole thing was impossible, and not worth it. Because from the perspective of 295, I was thinking, "oh no, even if I lose 100 lbs, I'll still be fat..."

295 was big, but 218 is still big. Looking forward to the prospect of losing 100 lbs, not getting there seems like failure.

But looking back from the perspective of 77 lbs lost, I now know that 218 and 295 are COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. Of course it was worth it. I look better, feel better, dress better, and have a completely revised sense of myself and my possibilities now.

I don't think it's "freakish" to stay on plan, and I don't think it's "freakish" not to stay on plan. I do think it "feels" freakish when you DO stay on plan, and still don't lose weight, but the weight does come off eventually.

So, to me, the most important thing is remembering that you will have succeeded long before you get to 100 lbs, and that being less obese is definitely much better than being more obese-- it's not just a fat/thin all or nothing dichotomy.

mandalinn82
02-26-2010, 04:11 PM
Again, not meaning to be disrespectful or anything, but since this just has not been my experience and I'm plain old curious, what about it sets you up for failure? How could you have failed? Those 8.6 lbs didn't fall off miraculously. You WORKED to get them off. You put effort into getting them off. Okay, granted I hear that you *failed* to get the 10 lbs off, you've *only* taken off 8.6 - so then what happens??? What happens AFTER you've missed the mark by 1.4 lbs?


I know you didn't ask me, but I have a personal experience with this.

I set time-based goals for much of my journey. I usually met them. I got injured at one point (a rotator cuff strain), and missed my goal weight for the time period I had defined by 2 lbs. Since the total goal was 20, I made 90% of my goal (a success by any definition), but at that time, I read it as "failure", which became a justification in my head..."look how hard I'm working, I'm still failing, screw this, why should I work so hard?". And that was a main contributing factor to 3 weeks off plan and a 4 lb regain...more than I'd missed my goal by!

I am not saying that not hitting my target FORCED me off plan. Obviously, the choice to not eat on plan was still mine, and I take full responsibility for that and did eventually haul myself back up. But mentally, that perception of "failure" was very hard for me to deal with, and I wasn't fully prepared for the emotional complications of feeling that way. There were several factors that affected my going off plan, but I'd say that the biggest contributor to my actions, from a mental perspective, was the "failure" to acheive my goal.

It was this incident that prompted me to stop making time-based goals, and instead focus on behaviors. Interestingly, too, I've since learned from trial and error that the particular painkiller I was on for the shoulder makes me retain water like MAD...I can easily go up 5 lbs taking half the prescribed dose for 2-3 days. So most likely, my "failure" didn't have anything to do with my actions, other than taking my medications as prescribed. If I had been focusing on behaviors at that point, like I learned to do for myself, I would have seen that I was doing my very best, which might have prevented the slide.

Just my two cents.

BeachBreeze2010
02-26-2010, 04:28 PM
As someone just beginning her journey and reading through this thread, I am completely amazed at the number of you who have lost so much, so quickly! I find it incredibly inspiring that weight loss can happen that fast! I have changed so many behaviors since Dec and feel like a new person, but still haven't fully absorbed the idea that by next Dec I could be 150 or 140lbs. That blows my mind! It makes me wonder that when I put up my winter coat (whenever that happens! :D), maybe I will need a new one next year. The summer after next, I might be wearing a normal bathing suit instead of a "fat girl" suit. These things just seem so intangible to me.

I guess my point is that for me, I can't even think about long term results right now. Literally, it doesn't compute. I have never known myself as a slim adult. (The last time I was slim I was 22 and regardless of the number, NOT an adult. ;) ) I am going 10lbs at a time and week by week. Did I eat the best whole foods I could put in my body at this meal? Trying to absorb all of the things that my life might be like next year are too overwhelming for me. I will deal with each small change and stage as it comes.

I could set a goal to lose the rest of my weight by Jan 1, but it doesn't have any real meaning to me. Just like the goal weight I put down when I made the signature over there <----, it's just a vague concept. For me, I don't think it would lead me to failure necessarily, but I don't plan to do it. I do plan to eat the grilled chicken with shallots and mushrooms for dinner tonight and exercise for an hour.

I can't express enough, again, how inspiring all of you maintainers and significant losers have been to me beginning this journey. It really is because of you that I feel that this time I will keep these habits permanently and someday get to goal (whatever that is!). :hug:

Idealmuse
02-26-2010, 04:39 PM
For a great deal of us it's what you really put into it. People Like CF and Robin were consistently on plan, but it's not the only way to success or lofty goals. I think these women rock... but plans this strict would back-fire on me big time.

Other people like myself have more slips and slides but I still managed to lose 110 my first year also... but why it worked for me despite less then ideal choices at times is. 1) I did not STOP and 2) I gave exercise probably a little more focus then your average person trying to lose weight. Paying extra close attention to my daily calorie deficit.

CAN you do it? Most likely, but it takes a whole lot of effort and it will slow down as you get closer to goal.

Putting a time-line on it could be good if goals really get you focused, or could be setting yourself up for frustration.

PeanutsMom704
02-26-2010, 04:49 PM
I keep reading mandalinn's posts and nodding my head.

I can be a perfectionist - I once had a boss tell me to do LESS work! He said that if I put in 10% less effort on each project, I'd still be doing 110%, and I needed to find a balance between quality and efficiency. With weight loss, perfectionist tendencies do make everything look black or white. Either I was on a diet or I was off of it. And if I made a bad eating choice, well, then I wasn't on a diet anymore, so I might as well eat whatever I want! And you can imagine what happens from there. For me, setting a time based goal can trigger that sort of reaction too - if I didn't meet my goal, well, then, what is the point of it all, so why bother, and why not just be a physical slug and eat whatever I want?

So for me, a big part of this journey is reframing the way I look at everything. I am not ON a diet, so I can't fall OFF one. I have chosen to make different choices about the way I eat and how much I move. And those are choices I plan to make forever. I try to be mindful each day of making the good choices - the points challenge here is really great for me. Although I've fallen off track this week, I know that I can just as easily have a 4 point day tomorrow, if I make the right choices.

However, I don't expect perfection from myself. Not that I think it's "freakish" if someone manages to stay on plan day in and day out for a year or longer, although part of me does wonder how a person with THAT much self-discipline gets significantly overweight in the first place. But I'm not in a race with anyone, including myself. I try every day to make all the right choices, but if I miss one, that's ok - I just need to make a better choice the next time. The next day, the next meal, even the very next bite are all opportunities for me to make a better choice.

One interesting thing is that I don't even feel badly when I don't make great choices. I try to own that choice too, and say, ok, right now, I really wanted this food, so I'm going to enjoy it and move on. That really helps to limit any potential damage. One bad meal doesn't mean the next one is bad too. And in reality, I'm naturally limiting portions so even a "bad meal" ain't what it used to be! My hope for a maintenance lifestyle is to eat most days the way I do right now - up to 1500 healthy calories a day - and then allow the occasional meal or even day off plan. I try to look at my bad days right now not as "falling off a diet" but as "practicing maintenance." To keep doing what I'm doing and heading in the right direction is far more important than doing it perfectly.

YMMV.

thistoo
02-26-2010, 05:11 PM
So I think neither way of 'being' is freakish at all. We are all different, we all have different issues (physical, mental, emotional) that got us fat so we all are not going to lose the weight in the same manner.

It's funny, because those of you who are strictly OP all the time feel like everyone else thinks you're a freak, and those of us who just can't lose fast for whatever reason feel the same vibe coming from the other 'camp', if you will.

I often feel like a freak, because I just *can't* get past this plateau, and I get the feeling a lot of the time that people think I am secretly binging and just not owning up to it. (Is that all in my head? Maybe so. But one of the fast losers did call my current plateau 'self-induced' recently, and that wasn't helpful.) Truth is I work *hard* and nothing. So far no medical answers either. It sucks.

Does that make me feel like a failure? Big time. If I had started out wanting to lose 100 pounds in 10 months, only to discover that I could barely lose 30 in a year, I would have felt like an even bigger failure than I often do these days (since I can't seem to make it to 100 pounds lost no matter what I do.)

Time-based goals work great for some people. Maybe that would work great for VickieLou. I know it sure doesn't work for me, and I think the people here who sound like they're trying to discourage VickieLou are just sharing the fact that sometimes plans go awry, no matter how hard you work to make them happen.

VickieLou
02-26-2010, 05:12 PM
Thank You All for your response to my Question. From reading your responses
it's alot of work to lose this much weight. I will need to Plan, and Focus on my goal. I won't feel like a failure if I don't reach my Goal. I will be a little disappointed if I don't at least lose 50 LBS. But right know I'm going to strive to reach 100 by the end of the year. Maybe, in 6 month's I will revise the goal, when I see how much my average is per month. I know when I get closer to goal I could hit a plateau. I'm doing calorie counting. I don't have any special event I'm losing weight for, I just am sick of being Unhealthy.
I got back on plan today. I found out recently my Dad has Cancer. I have health problems of my own. I need to face reality and do something about my health now. Maybe, it's aimming a bit high but I'm hoping it will help motivate me. Thank You for Your Support and Advice. 3FC members are such an Inspiration to me.

rockinrobin
02-26-2010, 05:15 PM
For a great deal of us it's what you really put into it. People Like CF and Robin were consistently on plan, but it's not the only way to success or lofty goals. I think these women rock... but plans this strict would back-fire on me big time.


Differences yet again coming through. I didn't see my plan as restrictive. Not. Even. A. Little. Bit. What I saw as restrictive was my OLD way of life. I was so held back. So not participating in life. I was so RESTRICTED in what I could or could not do. I was choking. Dying in fact.

No, my plan was freeing and liberating and delightful and lovely. I LOVED (still do) everything about it. For the first time I truly found comfort in food. Never mind the wonderful over the top benefits to be had from my plan, but just staying on plan in and of itself brought my much happiness and joy.

weebleswobble
02-26-2010, 05:20 PM
I've been diet-compliant since mid-August, so that means I've lost 69 pounds in 7 months. But I had an unforseen glitch -- I've only lost 8 pounds since December 7 due to an injury (a serious burn) and the Dr. prescribed going-off-diet (he said "you need carbs, grrr!"), going off my rate of loss, I probably could lose another 25-30 pounds in 3 months...if I was really motivated and stepped up my exercise near the end. This is a life change, not a 10-month goal.

WarMaiden
02-26-2010, 05:27 PM
I no longer set true time-based goals, because I do not find them useful for my progress or my daily mindset. Focusing too far into the future leads me into wishful-thinking fantasy-land and away from what I need to do today, which is not fantastical at all, but rather quite simple. In fact, a time-based goal led me last year to do something drastic with my diet, which I shortly realized was completely unsustainable for me. Then I stopped "dieting" for about 6 months and just maintained, which did wonders for my mental health.

Sometimes I entertain thoughts like, "Wow if I could just lose 1.5 pounds per week, then I could be at X weight by Y date!" Then I kind of chuckle at myself and just look back again to what I'm doing today, which will (with ongoing adjustments as needed) eventually get me to where I want to be.

I lost 85 pounds in my first year of "dieting" and that was darn good enough, despite the fact that I began with the fantasy of losing 100. I was not disappointed in myself or my body. And I am still not.

Michelle98272
02-26-2010, 05:33 PM
Michelle,





But HOW does that fall INTO the all or nothing category???????????

All or nothing is...."I must lose 100 lbs in 10 months. period." All=100lbs
99lbs or less=nothing. All or nothing to me means anything less than 100% success is failure.

Idealmuse
02-26-2010, 05:40 PM
Thank You All for your response to my Question. From reading your responses
it's alot of work to lose this much weight. I will need to Plan, and Focus on my goal. I won't feel like a failure if I don't reach my Goal. I will be a little disappointed if I don't at least lose 50 LBS. But right know I'm going to strive to reach 100 by the end of the year. Maybe, in 6 month's I will revise the goal, when I see how much my average is per month. I know when I get closer to goal I could hit a plateau. I'm doing calorie counting. I don't have any special event I'm losing weight for, I just am sick of being Unhealthy.
I got back on plan today. I found out recently my Dad has Cancer. I have health problems of my own. I need to face reality and do something about my health now. Maybe, it's aimming a bit high but I'm hoping it will help motivate me. Thank You for Your Support and Advice. 3FC members are such an Inspiration to me.

Sounds like you have reasonable expectations... You can do this just make yourself important enough to do what needs to be done. The rest should follow. Dust off and keep going is always the most important bit. We look forward to reading about your success!

Arctic Mama
02-26-2010, 05:59 PM
If you're not going to be disappointed by not making your goal, should something happen, and a larger goal is more motivating for you, then I wish you the very best, Vickie!

I do better with slower, incremental loss that doesn't disallow certain foods or a more moderate approach, but everyone's mileage varies depending on their lifestyle and personality. We can only ever give advice from our own perspective, which may differ from yours :)

carter
02-26-2010, 06:04 PM
I am learning about myself that setting time-based goals (not just for weight loss, but for anything) is a recipe for procrastination.

If I tell myself I want to accomplish X in 10 months, then I am more inclined to think, well 10 months minus one day is still a lot of time, so I can worry about this tomorrow.

Lather, rinse, repeat, until suddenly I realize there's not enough time left to meet that goal and I either panic (if it's something I absolutely have to do for work) or bail (if it's something I can get away without doing, like losing weight).

I am starting to realize that the way my brain works, I have to live in the moment a lot more. I have to focus on what I am doing today, right now. For weight loss, that means make the best choice I can make each time I presented with a choice, and just trust that if I make the right choice every time (or, almost every time), then the weight will come off in time.

If I say "I'll do X by July," then I stop thinking about X today. I have to think about today today.

That's me. Your mileage may vary.

rockinrobin
02-26-2010, 06:06 PM
VickieLou, you do whatever you think may be the *answer* for you. But please be open to re-thinking, changing up and tweaking as you go along if need be. If you should find so and so is no longer working for you, don't give up - CHANGE it up. Whether it be your thinking, your plan, your goals - your whatever.

The surest way not to fail, is to be determined to succeed!!! :hug:

H8cake
02-27-2010, 03:32 PM
"I found out recently my Dad has Cancer. I have health problems of my own. I need to face reality and do something about my health now."

I was never able to get the weight off when my motivation was only to look better. When my mom died of complications from diabetes and I had all the symptoms of it, I finally reached the point where I was willing to do the work to lose. I love looking better, I love all the cute small clothes I have, but that wasn't enough to get me moving. When you realize your health and quality of life is in danger it takes on a whole different level of importance. I didn't lose 100 pounds in a year. I lost eighty-one pounds in one year, but I just kept going and hit 100 pounds lost in 15 months. I was determined, and stuck to my plan like glue. I felt awesome about the whole process. I was thrilled by my progress, I was completely changing my body and health. I didn't have a time goal when I started so I didn't even think about it not happening soon enough. I did get a little impatient when I hit 170 and things started slowing down. The last 20 pounds come off much slower, for me at least. But really, all the major health benefits had already come by that point. Then, I have to admit, I was totally loving the vanity side of the whole thing :D
Don't forget to stop and celebrate all the wonderful changes, those NSV's we talk so much about, along the way. It's important to see all the blessings that come with losing the weight and getting healthier. They come with each pound that you lose. Every time you exercise you are benefiting your body as well. Stop and smell the roses along the way. Getting to your goal is fabulous, but much of the benefits come before you reach that point. Once you hit goal you will be doing all the same things in order to stay there, so very little changes at that point. It's definitely a life change, not a temporary thing. You can do it, I'm anxious to hear of your progress.
I wish you much success!

momof5k
02-27-2010, 10:18 PM
It is possible but I would encourage you not to get TOO hung up on such a specific goal.

I lost 100 pounds in 10 months (barely...) but I started higher and the scale has been moving V E R Y S L O W L Y the last two months. I have learned that the closer to you get to your goal, the harder it is.

Rather than fixating on the 100 by year end, celebrate whatever you have lost...whether that is 100 or 70 or 50....you'll feel so much better no matter what!

catowned
02-28-2010, 09:54 AM
It will be a year for me on April 18th of this year, so I'm at 131 in 10 months. But I also was WAY fatter than you when I started. The less I weigh, the harder losing it gets. And the slooooower it gets.

I really like the idea of saying to yourself, "I'm going to stay on plan for the next 10 months, minimal slip ups, and see how much I can lose." 10 months of great habits, on plan calories, and exercise? That will be so good for you and your health no matter what the scale says in the end. And honestly, would you be bummed to lose, say, 60 pounds by the end of the year?

Don't set yourself up for failure by setting a "X pounds by X date" goal. Set a goal to be a pitbull about your plan and then enjoy your results, whatever they may be!

That is the point I reached a few months ago. I got rid of my scale. I've had some health problems to postpone my plans but this summer I reached a point where I decided I would do some kind of exercise every single day except when AF is here.